Ren Allen

"I guess this is my fear. I don't want my daughter to be
without guidance because I see the irreversable dicisions I made
under this type of parenting. "

Stick around...you'll see many examples that show just how involved
and focused these unschooling parents are.:)

My children trust my guidance because it isn't offered up with
punishment. I DO believe in being an example and I don't control
anything that doesn't need controlling. They are free to be who they
are, but they also know I'm totally available.

I get a bit coercive if anyone is trying to harm themselves or
others....and occasionally the house is SO disgusting, that I'll be
a bit more forward than usual. "I have to have help today, when can
you help me out?" might happen if I'm feeling overwhelmed. Not "WILL
you help me?" but "WHEN will you help me?" :)
They have so much freedom and lead such happy lives overall, that
they're really very receptive when I reach that point.
I try to always help them with everything....bringing drinks and
food to each other (rather than the "get it yourself" that I often
got as a child or "your legs look healthy to me"), helping each
other clean or cook or many other kindnesses that help this family
be more peaceful.
There are crabby/tense moments, we're all human. But the unschooling
philosophies have changed our lives dramatically.

It's not about leaving kids to figure things out on their own, and
it's not about controlling their choices. Unschooling is the
opposite of neglect, it takes a ton of energy and time to make it
joyful and bubbly the way it should be. But as the kids get older, I
think it's the easier route...because the focus is on happy, strong,
respectful relationships and when you have those, everything else in
life just falls into place.

Ren

Katie

--- In [email protected], "Ren Allen"
<starsuncloud@n...> wrote:
> "I guess this is my fear. I don't want my daughter to be
> without guidance because I see the irreversable dicisions I made
> under this type of parenting. "
>
> Stick around...you'll see many examples that show just how
involved
> and focused these unschooling parents are.:)
>


Thanks, I needed to hear that. I can see that after reading more
the last few days. It's good to know that guidance is hugely there
and that the idea is to still step in when absolutely necessary.
I'm glad to be here!

Katie