Ren Allen

"Although I work with my
kids and compromise and negotiate, I AM still the mom, and there ARE
times when
we ALL have to do something, whether we want to or not. "

Like what?
I'm being serious here...there is nothing in my life that I don't
CHOOSE to do. There are plenty of things that aren't my favorite
activities, but I choose them because I like the activity better
than the consequence. There is still choice involved.
I doubt the child that was "dawdling" (probably not wanting to go
somewhere he was forced to go) really chose to go to school in
pj's. "Natural consequences" is really just punishment in disguise.
True natural consequences happen all on their own. The natural
consequence of not eating is being hungry. The natural consequence
of my spending too much money is I'll have less.
Making a child go to school in pajamas is more about the parent
making a point in my opinion.

But I'm not here to find fault with your choices...truly.
I was simply pointing out that it wasn't a good example of how
unschooling works, or how we use unschooling philosophies to assist
our parenting choices.
A criticism of information is not a criticism of you as a parent.

If someone is using a school example to explain unschooling
philosophies, I'm going to question that at my list.

Keeping my child safe from impending danger IS my job as a mother.
That does not mean I use "natural consequences" to try and teach
them a lesson. Real life consequences will happen. But my children
trust me to help them when they need to get ready, to not force them
to do things they don't want to do and to keep them healthy and safe.

Whatever your choices were in the past, or whatever your parenting
situation, I believe you (just as myself) did the best you could at
the time. That doesn't mean we did great, we just did our best.
Hopefully our best keeps getting better.
I can certainly look back and see where I made tremendous mistakes.

I hope that at an unschooling list, we could admit that sending a
child anywhere in clothing they didn't want to be seen in, is not
the most respectful choice.

Ren