Amanda Horein

This isn't going to be a typical question, but we have had a few issues come
to the surface lately that I have been reflecting on today.

My oldest daughter is 7 1/2 and LOVES video games. We regulated her video
games up until about August 2007, right after she turned 7. Then we just
stopped regulating and for the most part, she gets to play whatever,
whenever and in general I have no problems with that. There are only a
couple issues where *I* need to change mindsets to be able to meet her
needs, but I am having a hard time doing so by myself.

First issue. Eating. She doesn't like to eat unless it is something that can
be eaten at the computer/game cube while she is playing. She waits until she
is "starving" before she realizes she is hungry and then she comes and wants
me to make her something, but it has to be like 5 minutes ago. I know that I
should be anticipating when she is hungry and offer her things in between
and I am working on that. My issue is that when I do make her something in
which she can eat at said gaming station she takes 2 or 3 bites and forgets
about it. Then by the time she realizes she is hungry again whatever I made
her is too gross to eat. What can I do? Smaller portions? That's all I could
think of. (Well, that and giving her the same old boring thing to eat every
time she wants something at the computer so that she will want something
else and come eat with us, but we gave that idea up because we felt that it
was too manipulative).

Oh, this eating thing happens in the "mornings" when she wakes up too. She
stays up late and gets up late which isn't a problem. She gets up about
11-11:30 in the morning and comes downstairs VERY hungry. Usually I am in
the middle of making lunch so I end up asking her to wait until lunch is
done, but she is too hungry for that, but I feel I just can't stop what I am
in the middle of (lunch is the main meal here at this house because dh works
2nds so it takes a few minutes and a good amount of my attention). She is
also not one to want to get things for herself. She wants us to do it for
her still. I think she still feels like she lacks the coordination or
something. Especially after busting open a full gallon of milk about a week
ago. I can't blame her for still wanting us to get it, so we do.

Second issue. She rarely wants to leave. It's almost like every time we
leave we are stealing away her time for gaming. We try setting a timer for
her and that helps. She complies. But only because she has to and I wonder
if that is why she is "holding onto" the video games "longer" in this
"deschooling process" or whatever it is. As far as leaving the house goes, I
know it isn't necessarily fair that we ask her to come with us, but
honestly, we are accustomed to doing things as a family. We have always gone
and did things, all four of us. Even running errands, grocery shopping, the
whole nine yards. She says going to the store is boring now (so we don't
typically take her anymore). Sometimes though, the errands have to include
both Roger and I. What do we do then?

On a related note, she hits yelling and near melt down mode if we ask to use
the computer for a minute while she is on. Generally, she has full rein of
the computer from the time she gets up, until she goes to bed at night, BUT
heaven forbid if we need to use the computer for anything. For example, I
did my SIL's taxes last year and she called me asking me to send them to her
by email. I told Marti that I needed to use the computer for a second and
got hostility in response. I don't know how to handle this hostility because
it just makes me want to revert back to my old parenting ways.

We even have two computers and her favorite games (mainly Furcadia) is
installed on both computers, but the files on the "good" (ie faster, so it
gets used the most) computer are not accessible from the Compaq (the "bad"
computer) because the network is not working properly even though we have
tried many times to fix that. So, theoretically she could go to the Compaq,
although I do know that is a lot to ask so I try not to.

I think that is it for her.

Now, just a quick question on the imaginary friends topic. My youngest has
this imaginary "friend" named Grandma-Aunt Shell (not sure whether this is a
grandma or an aunt, it changes from moment to moment, but that isn't the
issue). Now the past three days in a row she has told me that she wants me
to take her to this person's house. I don't really know what to say, so I
say "I don't know where she lives" and she tells me that she will show me
how to get there. Do I take her out and really try to let her show me where
this person lives or do you think... I don't know. What would you do?

Thanks a bunch everyone!

--
Amanda
Wife to Roger (together 10 years)
Mum to Marti (7.5) and Lilly (4)
Babysitter to Stella (3.5)
http://whatmykidstaughtme.blogspot.com/

My love to Uncle Jesse's family. Know that I love and miss him.


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

wisdomalways5

--- In [email protected], "Amanda Horein"
<horein@...> wrote:
>
> Now, just a quick question on the imaginary friends topic. My
youngest has
> this imaginary "friend" named Grandma-Aunt Shell (not sure whether
this is a
> grandma or an aunt, it changes from moment to moment, but that
isn't the
> issue). Now the past three days in a row she has told me that she
wants me
> to take her to this person's house. I don't really know what to
say, so I
> say "I don't know where she lives" and she tells me that she will
show me
> how to get there. Do I take her out and really try to let her show
me where
> this person lives or do you think... I don't know. What would you
do?
>
> Thanks a bunch everyone!
>


I would try driving around and see where she takes you- do you
believe in past lives? I think it is a fascinating subject and worth
exploring with her- Try reading Sylvia Browne on the subject

Julie

Jodi Bezzola

Hi Amanda, Our family is really new to unschooling so I don't have much experience to offer you, but a few things came to my mind reading your email.

I read a story in Life Learning magazine about a family who decided to stop regulating their son's tv viewing. He spent 6 months straight just watching tv, with them trusting him and sometimes wondering if that's all he would ever choose to do again, then one day just didn't turn the tv on, and his tv watching has been off and on ever since. I really believe the whole dynamic of restriction can take a long time to work out of someone's system. My mom totally restriced sugar, and I'm 41 and still working on that one! :o)

Smaller portions with the food sounds ideal to me. And it sounds like she may lack confidence in the kitchen. Would she like to choose a recipe and cook it with you or her dad to have a 'success' in the kitchen? Perhaps something she really likes? Just a thought.

And I would certainly get in the car and get my child to show me where her imaginary friend lives. I would be *so* curious! I've heard some amazing stories about the inner lives of smaller children and their 'knowing'.

Like I said, we've only been unschooing a short while, but these are some of my thoughts.

All the best!

Jodi

Amanda Horein <horein@...> wrote:
This isn't going to be a typical question, but we have had a few issues come
to the surface lately that I have been reflecting on today.

My oldest daughter is 7 1/2 and LOVES video games. We regulated her video
games up until about August 2007, right after she turned 7. Then we just
stopped regulating and for the most part, she gets to play whatever,
whenever and in general I have no problems with that. There are only a
couple issues where *I* need to change mindsets to be able to meet her
needs, but I am having a hard time doing so by myself.

First issue. Eating. She doesn't like to eat unless it is something that can
be eaten at the computer/game cube while she is playing. She waits until she
is "starving" before she realizes she is hungry and then she comes and wants
me to make her something, but it has to be like 5 minutes ago. I know that I
should be anticipating when she is hungry and offer her things in between
and I am working on that. My issue is that when I do make her something in
which she can eat at said gaming station she takes 2 or 3 bites and forgets
about it. Then by the time she realizes she is hungry again whatever I made
her is too gross to eat. What can I do? Smaller portions? That's all I could
think of. (Well, that and giving her the same old boring thing to eat every
time she wants something at the computer so that she will want something
else and come eat with us, but we gave that idea up because we felt that it
was too manipulative).

Oh, this eating thing happens in the "mornings" when she wakes up too. She
stays up late and gets up late which isn't a problem. She gets up about
11-11:30 in the morning and comes downstairs VERY hungry. Usually I am in
the middle of making lunch so I end up asking her to wait until lunch is
done, but she is too hungry for that, but I feel I just can't stop what I am
in the middle of (lunch is the main meal here at this house because dh works
2nds so it takes a few minutes and a good amount of my attention). She is
also not one to want to get things for herself. She wants us to do it for
her still. I think she still feels like she lacks the coordination or
something. Especially after busting open a full gallon of milk about a week
ago. I can't blame her for still wanting us to get it, so we do.

Second issue. She rarely wants to leave. It's almost like every time we
leave we are stealing away her time for gaming. We try setting a timer for
her and that helps. She complies. But only because she has to and I wonder
if that is why she is "holding onto" the video games "longer" in this
"deschooling process" or whatever it is. As far as leaving the house goes, I
know it isn't necessarily fair that we ask her to come with us, but
honestly, we are accustomed to doing things as a family. We have always gone
and did things, all four of us. Even running errands, grocery shopping, the
whole nine yards. She says going to the store is boring now (so we don't
typically take her anymore). Sometimes though, the errands have to include
both Roger and I. What do we do then?

On a related note, she hits yelling and near melt down mode if we ask to use
the computer for a minute while she is on. Generally, she has full rein of
the computer from the time she gets up, until she goes to bed at night, BUT
heaven forbid if we need to use the computer for anything. For example, I
did my SIL's taxes last year and she called me asking me to send them to her
by email. I told Marti that I needed to use the computer for a second and
got hostility in response. I don't know how to handle this hostility because
it just makes me want to revert back to my old parenting ways.

We even have two computers and her favorite games (mainly Furcadia) is
installed on both computers, but the files on the "good" (ie faster, so it
gets used the most) computer are not accessible from the Compaq (the "bad"
computer) because the network is not working properly even though we have
tried many times to fix that. So, theoretically she could go to the Compaq,
although I do know that is a lot to ask so I try not to.

I think that is it for her.

Now, just a quick question on the imaginary friends topic. My youngest has
this imaginary "friend" named Grandma-Aunt Shell (not sure whether this is a
grandma or an aunt, it changes from moment to moment, but that isn't the
issue). Now the past three days in a row she has told me that she wants me
to take her to this person's house. I don't really know what to say, so I
say "I don't know where she lives" and she tells me that she will show me
how to get there. Do I take her out and really try to let her show me where
this person lives or do you think... I don't know. What would you do?

Thanks a bunch everyone!

--
Amanda
Wife to Roger (together 10 years)
Mum to Marti (7.5) and Lilly (4)
Babysitter to Stella (3.5)
http://whatmykidstaughtme.blogspot.com/

My love to Uncle Jesse's family. Know that I love and miss him.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]






---------------------------------
Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

BRIAN POLIKOWSKY

Hi Amanda,
I have many things to say about how I do it but I will try tomorrow!
have a good night!
Alex


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Alysia

"Now, just a quick question on the imaginary friends topic. My youngest has
this imaginary "friend" named Grandma-Aunt Shell (not sure whether this is a
grandma or an aunt, it changes from moment to moment, but that isn't the
issue). Now the past three days in a row she has told me that she wants me
to take her to this person's house. I don't really know what to say, so I
say "I don't know where she lives" and she tells me that she will show me
how to get there. Do I take her out and really try to let her show me where
this person lives or do you think... I don't know. What would you do?"


This sounds like it could be a lot of fun. Does she want to go for a drive or a walk?

Alysia


---------------------------------
Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

BRIAN POLIKOWSKY

My oldest daughter is 7 1/2 and LOVES video games. We regulated her video
games up until about August 2007, right after she turned 7. Then we just
stopped regulating and for the most part, she gets to play whatever,
whenever and in general I have no problems with that. There are only a
couple issues where *I* need to change mindsets to be able to meet her
needs, but I am having a hard time doing so by myself.

\=\=\=\=\=\=\=\=

Glad you get it that you can only change YOUR mindset!

\=\=\=\=\=\=\=



First issue. Eating. She doesn't like to eat unless it is something that can
be eaten at the computer/game cube while she is playing. She waits until she
is "starving" before she realizes she is hungry and then she comes and wants
me to make her something, but it has to be like 5 minutes ago. I know that I
should be anticipating when she is hungry and offer her things in between
and I am working on that. My issue is that when I do make her something in
which she can eat at said gaming station she takes 2 or 3 bites and forgets
about it. Then by the time she realizes she is hungry again whatever I made
her is too gross to eat. What can I do? Smaller portions? That's all I could
think of. (Well, that and giving her the same old boring thing to eat every
time she wants something at the computer so that she will want something
else and come eat with us, but we gave that idea up because we felt that it
was too manipulative) .

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Again glad you are not trying to manipulate her!!LOL;)

When my 5 yo ds is playing and really into the game I bring him food and drinks every 2-3hours. Most what I bring is a "goody's plate" as he calls it. I put in, apple pieces, cheese, Little bread squares ( any topping you want), chips, cereal, crackers, egg white, baby carrots you name it. All in little bite sizes.

I also bring him lunch and many times I just hand feed him while he plays. He eats , he is happy and I am happy . We also talk about how when you are hungry you don't play as good as you can because all your body and you head need the nutrients to do their best.

-=-=-=-=-=-===-=-=-=-=-


Oh, this eating thing happens in the "mornings" when she wakes up too. She
stays up late and gets up late which isn't a problem. She gets up about
11-11:30 in the morning and comes downstairs VERY hungry. Usually I am in
the middle of making lunch so I end up asking her to wait until lunch is
done, but she is too hungry for that, but I feel I just can't stop what I am
in the middle of (lunch is the main meal here at this house because DH works
2nds so it takes a few minutes and a good amount of my attention). She is
also not one to want to get things for herself. She wants us to do it for
her still. I think she still feels like she lacks the coordination or
something. Especially after busting open a full gallon of milk about a week
ago. I can't blame her for still wanting us to get it, so we do.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=--=

Have something ready for her then, or just fix something easy while you are making lunch.
I am not a chef ( but have several in my family ( including brother and BIL) but it is very doable to get something ready very quick WHILE you make something else.
You can do it. No excuses.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=--=--



Second issue. She rarely wants to leave. It's almost like every time we
leave we are stealing away her time for gaming. We try setting a timer for
her and that helps. She complies. But only because she has to and I wonder
if that is why she is "holding onto" the video games "longer" in this
"deschooling process" or whatever it is. As far as leaving the house goes, I
know it isn't necessarily fair that we ask her to come with us, but
honestly, we are accustomed to doing things as a family. We have always gone
and did things, all four of us. Even running errands, grocery shopping, the
whole nine yards. She says going to the store is boring now (so we don't
typically take her anymore). Sometimes though, the errands have to include
both Roger and I. What do we do then?

=\\=\=\=\=\=\=\=\=\


My ds gets like that too. Friday I wanted to go take them to play at out club ( awesome kids area) and his friends where going to be there. He did not want to. I stayed home. No big deal. DH went grocery shopping even thou I wanted to go to and got what we needed.
My ds also have a Nintendo DS that makes going out easier for him when he is in a video game mode.
Sometimes he will take his ds and play it only in the car. But I think because I have listened to him and d\stayed home many times when he asked he is more willing to come when we need to.
Because your dd had video games limited in her life ( my ds never had anything limited) it is probably harder for her to let go. Little by little she will begin to trust that you will not limit her again and she will be able to let go when you need. But there will be times when won't.


=-=-=--=-=-=-=-=--=-

On a related note, she hits yelling and near melt down mode if we ask to use
the computer for a minute while she is on. Generally, she has full rein of
the computer from the time she gets up, until she goes to bed at night, BUT
heaven forbid if we need to use the computer for anything. For example, I
did my SIL's taxes last year and she called me asking me to send them to her
by email. I told Marti that I needed to use the computer for a second and
got hostility in response. I don't know how to handle this hostility because
it just makes me want to revert back to my old parenting ways.

We even have two computers and her favorite games (mainly Furcadia) is
installed on both computers, but the files on the "good" (ie faster, so it
gets used the most) computer are not accessible from the Compaq (the "bad"
computer) because the network is not working properly even though we have
tried many times to fix that. So, theoretically she could go to the Compaq,
although I do know that is a lot to ask so I try not to.

-=-=-=-=-=-==-=-=-
Can YOU use the "bad" computer??? Can you get her another computer?
Also if she is concentrated in her game and you want her to stop so you can used it that can be frustrating to a young child. My ds just gave me a couple of minutes to write this e-mail. He has been very generous today but I know that if he was really into a new thing it would not have gone so smooth.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=--

I think that is it for her.

Now, just a quick question on the imaginary friends topic. My youngest has
this imaginary "friend" named Grandma-Aunt Shell (not sure whether this is a
grandma or an aunt, it changes from moment to moment, but that isn't the
issue). Now the past three days in a row she has told me that she wants me
to take her to this person's house. I don't really know what to say, so I
say "I don't know where she lives" and she tells me that she will show me
how to get there. Do I take her out and really try to let her show me where
this person lives or do you think... I don't know. What would you do?


=-=-=-=-----=-=-=-
Like someone said. Go drive to the friends house and see where it leads you. It may be a fun adventure.
My ds had two imaginary friends a long time ago. Jack and Sweeper. I treated them like his real friends. I actually miss them now that they are gone. <G>.


Alex




[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

BRIAN POLIKOWSKY

My oldest daughter is 7 1/2 and LOVES video games. We regulated her video
games up until about August 2007, right after she turned 7. Then we just
stopped regulating and for the most part, she gets to play whatever,
whenever and in general I have no problems with that. There are only a
couple issues where *I* need to change mindsets to be able to meet her
needs, but I am having a hard time doing so by myself.

\=\=\=\=\=\=\=\=

Glad you get it that you can only change YOUR mindset!

\=\=\=\=\=\=\=



First issue. Eating. She doesn't like to eat unless it is something that can
be eaten at the computer/game cube while she is playing. She waits until she
is "starving" before she realizes she is hungry and then she comes and wants
me to make her something, but it has to be like 5 minutes ago. I know that I
should be anticipating when she is hungry and offer her things in between
and I am working on that. My issue is that when I do make her something in
which she can eat at said gaming station she takes 2 or 3 bites and forgets
about it. Then by the time she realizes she is hungry again whatever I made
her is too gross to eat. What can I do? Smaller portions? That's all I could
think of. (Well, that and giving her the same old boring thing to eat every
time she wants something at the computer so that she will want something
else and come eat with us, but we gave that idea up because we felt that it
was too manipulative) .

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Again glad you are not trying to manipulate her!!LOL;)

When my 5 yo ds is playing and really into the game I bring him food and drinks every 2-3hours. Most what I bring is a "goody's plate" as he calls it. I put in, apple pieces, cheese, Little bread squares ( any topping you want), chips, cereal, crackers, egg white, baby carrots you name it. All in little bite sizes.

I also bring him lunch and many times I just hand feed him while he plays. He eats , he is happy and I am happy . We also talk about how when you are hungry you don't play as good as you can because all your body and you head need the nutrients to do their best.

-=-=-=-=-=-===-=-=-=-=-


Oh, this eating thing happens in the "mornings" when she wakes up too. She
stays up late and gets up late which isn't a problem. She gets up about
11-11:30 in the morning and comes downstairs VERY hungry. Usually I am in
the middle of making lunch so I end up asking her to wait until lunch is
done, but she is too hungry for that, but I feel I just can't stop what I am
in the middle of (lunch is the main meal here at this house because DH works
2nds so it takes a few minutes and a good amount of my attention). She is
also not one to want to get things for herself. She wants us to do it for
her still. I think she still feels like she lacks the coordination or
something. Especially after busting open a full gallon of milk about a week
ago. I can't blame her for still wanting us to get it, so we do.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=--=

Have something ready for her then, or just fix something easy while you are making lunch.
I am not a chef ( but have several in my family ( including brother and BIL) but it is very doable to get something ready very quick WHILE you make something else.
You can do it. No excuses.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=--=--



Second issue. She rarely wants to leave. It's almost like every time we
leave we are stealing away her time for gaming. We try setting a timer for
her and that helps. She complies. But only because she has to and I wonder
if that is why she is "holding onto" the video games "longer" in this
"deschooling process" or whatever it is. As far as leaving the house goes, I
know it isn't necessarily fair that we ask her to come with us, but
honestly, we are accustomed to doing things as a family. We have always gone
and did things, all four of us. Even running errands, grocery shopping, the
whole nine yards. She says going to the store is boring now (so we don't
typically take her anymore). Sometimes though, the errands have to include
both Roger and I. What do we do then?

=\\=\=\=\=\=\=\=\=\


My ds gets like that too. Friday I wanted to go take them to play at out club ( awesome kids area) and his friends where going to be there. He did not want to. I stayed home. No big deal. DH went grocery shopping even thou I wanted to go to and got what we needed.
My ds also have a Nintendo DS that makes going out easier for him when he is in a video game mode.
Sometimes he will take his ds and play it only in the car. But I think because I have listened to him and d\stayed home many times when he asked he is more willing to come when we need to.
Because your dd had video games limited in her life ( my ds never had anything limited) it is probably harder for her to let go. Little by little she will begin to trust that you will not limit her again and she will be able to let go when you need. But there will be times when won't.


=-=-=--=-=-=-=-=--=-

On a related note, she hits yelling and near melt down mode if we ask to use
the computer for a minute while she is on. Generally, she has full rein of
the computer from the time she gets up, until she goes to bed at night, BUT
heaven forbid if we need to use the computer for anything. For example, I
did my SIL's taxes last year and she called me asking me to send them to her
by email. I told Marti that I needed to use the computer for a second and
got hostility in response. I don't know how to handle this hostility because
it just makes me want to revert back to my old parenting ways.

We even have two computers and her favorite games (mainly Furcadia) is
installed on both computers, but the files on the "good" (ie faster, so it
gets used the most) computer are not accessible from the Compaq (the "bad"
computer) because the network is not working properly even though we have
tried many times to fix that. So, theoretically she could go to the Compaq,
although I do know that is a lot to ask so I try not to.

-=-=-=-=-=-==-=-=-
Can YOU use the "bad" computer??? Can you get her another computer?
Also if she is concentrated in her game and you want her to stop so you can used it that can be frustrating to a young child. My ds just gave me a couple of minutes to write this e-mail. He has been very generous today but I know that if he was really into a new thing it would not have gone so smooth.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=--

I think that is it for her.

Now, just a quick question on the imaginary friends topic. My youngest has
this imaginary "friend" named Grandma-Aunt Shell (not sure whether this is a
grandma or an aunt, it changes from moment to moment, but that isn't the
issue). Now the past three days in a row she has told me that she wants me
to take her to this person's house. I don't really know what to say, so I
say "I don't know where she lives" and she tells me that she will show me
how to get there. Do I take her out and really try to let her show me where
this person lives or do you think... I don't know. What would you do?


=-=-=-=-----=-=-=-
Like someone said. Go drive to the friends house and see where it leads you. It may be a fun adventure.
My ds had two imaginary friends a long time ago. Jack and Sweeper. I treated them like his real friends. I actually miss them now that they are gone. <G>.


Alex




[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Carle

Thomas had 3 Imaginary Friends [Ko-ka-ki. Do-ga-lay-die-key. and
Bummer]He played with them, visited with them and we even took them
on holiday. It started when he was 3 and now if asked he says they
don't visit any more. [Though he will tell you what they are doing
at their respective houses.] He is 5yrs 5 months now.

For him these Imaginary Friends are valuable and therefore part of
his childhood development. I guess he has a great imagination!

Live the moment and enjoy the process!

Blessings
Carle'



--- In [email protected], Alysia <keetry@...> wrote:
>
> "Now, just a quick question on the imaginary friends topic. My
youngest has
> this imaginary "friend" named Grandma-Aunt Shell (not sure whether
this is a
> grandma or an aunt, it changes from moment to moment, but that
isn't the
> issue). Now the past three days in a row she has told me that she
wants me
> to take her to this person's house. I don't really know what to
say, so I
> say "I don't know where she lives" and she tells me that she will
show me
> how to get there. Do I take her out and really try to let her show
me where
> this person lives or do you think... I don't know. What would you
do?"
>
>
> This sounds like it could be a lot of fun. Does she want to go
for a drive or a walk?
>
> Alysia
>
>
> ---------------------------------
> Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo!
Mobile. Try it now.
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>

[email protected]

-----Original Message-----
From: Carle <dehningc@...>

Thomas had 3 Imaginary Friends [Ko-ka-ki. Do-ga-lay-die-key. and
Bummer]He played with them, visited with them and we even took them
on holiday. It started when he was 3 and now if asked he says they
don't visit any more. [Though he will tell you what they are doing
at their respective houses.] He is 5yrs 5 months now.

For him these Imaginary Friends are valuable and therefore part of
his childhood development. I guess he has a great imagination!


-=-=-=-

Duncan never had an imaginary friend. Cameron did though.

He called him "the Boy" for months. Sometimes he wouldn't go into his
room or the living room because "the Boy" was in there. This went on
for months. Months and months. Finally, I got him to ask "the Boy" what
his name was. After several weeks of being too afraid to ask him,
Cameron said his name was "Willie." Willie sometimes lived with us and
sometimes traveled. Occasionally we'd see him on the side of the road
and have to stop to pick him up. Willie had certain foods he liked and
certain blankets that he preferred. Overall, Willie was a pretty cool
dude. It just took a while to get to know Willie and to not be afraid
of this imaginary stranger/friend.

I miss Willie now. Willie told long stories that Cameron could retell
to me. Willie was funny and well-traveled and liked ice cream. <g>



~Kelly

Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org




________________________________________________________________________
More new features than ever. Check out the new AOL Mail ! -
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diana jenner

On Feb 4, 2008 8:08 AM:

> For him these Imaginary Friends are valuable and therefore part of
> his childhood development. I guess he has a great imagination!
>
>
>
>


For Hayden, I felt it was of vast importance to honor these friends as
*invisible* friends. Just because *I* can't see Dodi & Gonzo & Lala, doesn't
mean they're *imaginary*.
It is respectful to honor these beings as *real* ~ our children do.
--
~diana :)
xoxoxoxo
hannahbearski.blogspot.com


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

michmdmama

I just wanted to make sure that it was clear that I am okay with the
imaginary friend. I just didn't know what to do about driving to said
friend's house.

Amanda

--- In [email protected], "diana jenner"
<hahamommy@...> wrote:
>
> On Feb 4, 2008 8:08 AM:
>
> > For him these Imaginary Friends are valuable and therefore part of
> > his childhood development. I guess he has a great imagination!
> >
> >
> >
> >
>
>
> For Hayden, I felt it was of vast importance to honor these friends as
> *invisible* friends. Just because *I* can't see Dodi & Gonzo & Lala,
doesn't
> mean they're *imaginary*.
> It is respectful to honor these beings as *real* ~ our children do.
> --
> ~diana :)
> xoxoxoxo
> hannahbearski.blogspot.com
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>

[email protected]

-----Original Message-----
From: michmdmama <horein@...>
To: [email protected]

I just wanted to make sure that it was clear that I am okay with the
imaginary friend. I just didn't know what to do about driving to said
friend's house.

-=-=-=-

Aren't you curious as to where this friend lives? <G>

I'd LOVE to know where Willie lived!

Maybe---call ahead and speak to the imaginary friend's mom and make
arrangements *not* to come in, but to "wave" as you drive by.



~Kelly

Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org



________________________________________________________________________
More new features than ever. Check out the new AOL Mail ! -
http://webmail.aol.com

[email protected]

Hi Amanda,

Have you thought about what you are going to say to your son if you drive him to where he says his friend lives and he gets out of the car and wants knock on the door?

I am all for Imaginary friends, sometimes we just need them in our lives. Our DS 6 uses his action figures as his friends sometimes. Do you know how hard it is to make a sandwich for a guy that is only 6 inches tall.LOL When it comes to drinks, I tell my son he has to share his drink with him.

Oneida
www.maanpasspindles.com



---------------------------------
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Melissa Gray

Dan used to have an entirely different family. It was very hard,
because he would tell everyone about his real mom and dad.
I would drive around.
Melissa
Mom to Joshua, Breanna, Emily, Rachel, Samuel, Daniel and Avari
Wife to Zane

blog me at
http://startlinglives.blogspot.com/




On Feb 4, 2008, at 4:22 PM, kbcdlovejo@... wrote:

>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: michmdmama <horein@...>
> To: [email protected]
>
> I just wanted to make sure that it was clear that I am okay with the
> imaginary friend. I just didn't know what to do about driving to said
> friend's house.
>
> -=-=-=-
>
> Aren't you curious as to where this friend lives? <G>
>
> I'd LOVE to know where Willie lived!
>
> Maybe---call ahead and speak to the imaginary friend's mom and make
> arrangements *not* to come in, but to "wave" as you drive by.
>
> ~Kelly
>
> Kelly Lovejoy
> Conference Coordinator
> Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
> http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org
>
> __________________________________________________________
> More new features than ever. Check out the new AOL Mail ! -
> http://webmail.aol.com
>
>



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

michmdmama

I think that is sort of what we are worried about.

Amanda

--- In [email protected], "scofield62001@..."
<scofield62001@...> wrote:
>
> Hi Amanda,
>
>Have you thought about what you are going to say to your son if you
drive him to where he says his friend lives and he gets out of the car
and wants knock on the door?

[email protected]

Ah, yes, imaginary friends...

When Julian was quite little he had a series. There was Tanya, who was male
and lived in an apartment that we passed when we rode the train into Boston.
Then there was Tree, who was dead. Apparently always had been, or something.
He was a weird kid.

But he has weird parents too. As the Old-Timers might recall ( Here, picture
Kathryn spitting out some chewing tobaccy and tugging on the straps of her
overalls), Julian had a community of squirrels that lived in his thick curly
hair. They all had names like Jo and Flo and Bo. (We have suggested that if
Julian ever has children that his partner should be in charge of names. His Sims
characters had names like Glork.)

The thing about those squirrels...I swear they were real. We'd have
conversations with them. It was weird. This went on a LONG time.

You know, the kid's awesome, but he was much more fun before he got Dignity.

Kathryn

Come to the Northeast Unschooling conference Memorial Day Weekend, May 23-25
2008 in Peabody, Massachusetts _www.northeastunschoolingconference.com_
(http://www.northeastunschoolingconference.com/)




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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

home_maker97

Hi! I am Jacquie 38,happily married to Jeff, a journeyman Electrician
for 10 years and we teach our 7 year old son Jonah. We are
eclectic/unschool but want to go unschool more. We believe in Child led
learnin- if they are not interested in learning it- wait he will gewt
there!
Jonah had an imiginary friend called mouse who, yes, was a mouse. He
had Mouse a couple of years and suddenly Mouse was gone. We got a
Hamster we tried to name Mouse bu it did not stick. It was fun while it
lasted. Now his home playmates are a Bassett Hound named Flash we
adopted almost a year ago form Bassett Rescue who is almost 7. A Pug
who is almost 8 named Sadie who we got free when she was 3. Four cats-
Ashley 11, Lisa & Tia (both gray- only Jonah can really tell them
apart, but they are his!) both 1, and Mittens who is a few months, a
bunny named Mr. Buttons and the hamster.
Jonah's intersts now are the Titanic, GI Joe, Netflix
movies,reading Dick & Jane books.
My interests are Knittng (taught myself 7 years ago an still learning)
reading, and church.

Lisa

My now 17 yr old had an imaginary friend when she was 3 or 4.... his
name was "baby fish" and he was the culprit for most mischief at our
house. He was frequently responsible for her seatbelt not being
fastened properly (or at all! these were the days when at age 4 they
could sit in a seatbelt) He was frequently the one that hid
shoes...especially ballet slippers moments before heading out the door
even though they had been left in the dance bag the week before!
He also wrote on a few walls, took cookies he decided later not to eat
and was frequently thrown under the bus by his friend for things she
clearly did! It was always funny they way she would query... "mommy
I think Baby fish may have broken that lamp... do you think he will
get a time out?" (OK those were the days when I was a very different
parent... I have recovered from those days! ) Anyway it was pretty
funny because baby fish had a much more interesting life than the rest
of us! He also seemed to visit and cause more mischief right around
the birth of any new baby at our house! We got used to the little
fellow... kind of miss him!

Thanks for bringing back some fond memories!
Lisa B





-

Debra Rossing

>Jonah had an imiginary friend called mouse who, yes, was a mouse
LOL I had a cat for many years who was named Mouse - when she was a wee
kitten, her body started to grow but her head stayed disproportionately
small for a while (it took a while for her head to grow into her body
size) and that made her look a lot like a rodent. Her name was
originally Dutchess - I named her that because even for a wee one, she
looked 'regal'. My dad thought it was funny because I lived in a town
called Windsor at the time, so he'd ask how the Dutchess of Windsor was
doing :-) But Mouse just 'stuck'

Deb

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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Karen A

An imaginary friend wasn't good enough for my son when he was about 3
or 4 years old. He had an imaginary COUNTRY!! He'd lived in France,
you know, for 10 years. He used to live there with Steve and they
had this mad 3 story apartment with a whole floor just for games and
stuff. I had to keep reminding his big brothers not to discredit his
stories because his imagination was important to him. I used to have
some great conversations with him full of "oohs" and "ahs" and "oh
really's!!!" It was kinda fun. I knew he'd grow out of it and was
kinda sad when he did, actually.

Karen

--- In [email protected], "Lisa" <jlblock01@...>
wrote:
>
> My now 17 yr old had an imaginary friend when she was 3 or 4.... his
> name was "baby fish" and he was the culprit for most mischief at our
> house. He was frequently responsible for her seatbelt not being
> fastened properly (or at all! these were the days when at age 4 they
> could sit in a seatbelt) He was frequently the one that hid
> shoes...especially ballet slippers moments before heading out the
door
> even though they had been left in the dance bag the week before!
> He also wrote on a few walls, took cookies he decided later not to
eat
> and was frequently thrown under the bus by his friend for things she
> clearly did! It was always funny they way she would
query... "mommy
> I think Baby fish may have broken that lamp... do you think he will
> get a time out?" (OK those were the days when I was a very
different
> parent... I have recovered from those days! ) Anyway it was pretty
> funny because baby fish had a much more interesting life than the
rest
> of us! He also seemed to visit and cause more mischief right
around
> the birth of any new baby at our house! We got used to the little
> fellow... kind of miss him!
>
> Thanks for bringing back some fond memories!
> Lisa B
>
>
>
>
>
> -
>