Rebecca De Hate

OK folks, it seems that I am getting this unschooling idea wrapped
around my brain -- everywhere I go I find myself thinking "hmm I bet
if that parent just tried this...." Does anyone else do that? I'm
not trying to be judgemental but I'm seeing how people react to kids
and I think -- "geez, I've done that but I bet if I just did this"
the child would be much happier. For instance, several times I see
children that are pretty young and the parent just expects the child
to sit in the high chair the whole time. One day a little girl was
crying and crying and crying and I just knew that she only wanted
her mom to hold her! but she wouldn't she made her sit in the high
chair. now I understand that the mom's reaction was probably that
I'm not going to reward her by holding her she needs to learn to
stop having a fit. However!!??? I've had the same thoughts so I
understand,, but to see from an outside angle made me re-think that
philosophy. It also amazes me how many people (including myself)
have excepted spanking. The other day at the daycare my boy goes to
the one lady even said she thinks that is why made buts... Now I
know she didn't and won't spank these kids but... since I've been
researching and de-schooling I've been really staying away from it.

Oh and then yesterday there was a gentlemen at the restaurant with a
boy that was probably around 5 -- Now in other peoples eyes (and
even mine a little, unfortunately) he seemed like an out right
brat. First, he (the child) decided he wanted to change tables so
his dad let him (good dad -- let's avoid argument and why not?) I
told that dad that sometimes we just have to do that.. I could tell
he was so relieved that someone understood why he let his child do
it. The boy also kept wanting to leave the dining room go to the
restroom, play with salt and sugars, etc. Even at one point the dad
was trying to get him to just sit up -- which wouldn't have been a
big deal except that he his feet were sticking out and people were
trying to pass. Not once did that father, threaten to spank, yell
or anything. I ended up talking with a bit and I could tell the dad
was glad to have someone that just understood. BUt I could see
other families looking and making judgement calls. However, I hate
it when parents gage how much there children should eat before they
get dessert. HOw does the parent know that child isn't close to
full and has just enough room to eat that ice cream? Would the
parent rather the child over eat (due to being pushed too) then eat
his dessert and eventually the child always overeats and may be over
weight...???

Anyway I'm babbling and I'm not even sure I'm getting my thoughts
out correctly. I basically just find a rewarding that I can see my
mind shifting from old ways to some unschooling thoughts.

Now if I can just always apply them to in my household more!!

By the way it has been happening more at home... when mommy let's go
if that darn control and just lets the day flow... the day does just
that flows very nicely -- perfect. when that happens i find myself
so anxious to get to the point of truly unschooling my children and
letting my life be content and joyful..

thanks to this group I'm learning...