Karen Swanay

It's both funny and sad that this has been hard for me to accept. I am a
> SAHM mom not because it's all I ever wanted to be but because I know it's
> the best thing for kids. I am a raw feeder, leaving the veterinary field
> because I could not longer look people in the eye and repeat the garbage
> that I was taught about how kibble is the only thing dogs should eat.
> Kibble is not biologically appropriate food for cats or dogs. Whole prey is
> what they should be eating. That's what is natural and best. I resisted
> this knowledge at first because it was not what I was taught. But then I
> looked at who was teaching it and it was the pet food companies! That is
> who teaches nutrition at vet schools. So veterinarians are not taught the
> truth they are taught the propaganda.
>

And now this...I was so invested in the boys until they hit school age. I
withheld vaccines because the risk wasn't acceptible to me when they were
babies. They co-slept with us until they were sleeping through the night.
It was when I had to hand them over to the school that I became so rigid
about rules etc...and I've been struggling with what I think are things that
aren't right to me. But the light has come on now. I can see it. I just
need to parent them as I did when they were babies. Only now I don't have
to be ever-vigilant.

This will come in time and I don't have to abdicate parenting them to do
this well. They are good boys not because we've forced them to be, but
because they are good kids and despite my shortcomings I am a good parent.
I'm involved and invested.

Thank you everyone but especially Joyce and Karen for talking me through
this hard transition. Karen Pryor calls it a "prelearning temper tantrum."
She says, "in humans prelearning temper tantrums often seem to take place
when long held beliefs are challenged and the subject knows deep inside that
there is some truth to the new information. The recognition that what has
been learned is not quite true seems to lead to the furious comeback, to
excessive response, far beyond disagreement, discussion or querying that
might off hand seem more probable and appropriate." She goes on to say,
"However, I have come to regard the prelearning temper tantrum as a strong
indicator that real learning is actually finally about to take place. If
you stand back and let it pass over, like a rainstorm, there may be rainbows
on the other side."

Now to get about the business of unlearning what I've accepted as truth but
what felt wrong all along.

Thank you!
Karen


>
>



--
"Family isn't about whose blood you have. It's about who you care about."

LOI 1/26/07
PA 3/22/07
DTC 8/10/07
Disclaimer: Any errors in spelling, tact, or fact are transmission errors.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~


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Joyce Fetteroll

On Oct 2, 2007, at 8:38 PM, Karen Swanay wrote:

> Thank you everyone but especially Joyce and Karen for talking me
> through
> this hard transition.

You're welcome! :-)

> Karen Pryor calls it a "prelearning temper tantrum."

Unfortunately I've seen far too many people stop at the temper
tantrum stage. It probably feels scary, like letting go of the side
of the pool so they give up and retreat.

Joyce

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