dealing w/family
Wildflower Car
My brother is coming in tomorrow to stay with us for 3 weeks. He is very
into the Assembly of God church. I have no problem with this, but he is
often times preachy while he is here. The last time he stayed he put his
hand on each of my kids heads and prayed for them while speaking in tongues
and such. I'm dreading it. :(
Wildflower
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into the Assembly of God church. I have no problem with this, but he is
often times preachy while he is here. The last time he stayed he put his
hand on each of my kids heads and prayed for them while speaking in tongues
and such. I'm dreading it. :(
Wildflower
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See what you�re getting into�before you go there
http://newlivehotmail.com/?ocid=TXT_TAGHM_migration_HM_viral_preview_0507
Ren Allen
~~The last time he stayed he put his
hand on each of my kids heads and prayed for them while speaking in
tongues~~
And you let him??? How did your kids feel about that?
I would think when he visits YOUR home, you should feel able to say
"no thanks bro"....that's what respect is all about.
Maybe you could throw in a pagan chant just to see how he reacts.;)
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
hand on each of my kids heads and prayed for them while speaking in
tongues~~
And you let him??? How did your kids feel about that?
I would think when he visits YOUR home, you should feel able to say
"no thanks bro"....that's what respect is all about.
Maybe you could throw in a pagan chant just to see how he reacts.;)
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
Wildflower Car
LOL...the girls let him and then said never again, they are open ideas and
they're pretty good at saying what they feel and when.
And to top it all off, my in-laws are coming Thursday through Saturday.
I'm starting to think drugs may be my only relief, :) JK
ACK, a full scale attack on unschooling! We must prepare for battle!
Wildflower
Tease your brain--play Clink! Win cool prizes!
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they're pretty good at saying what they feel and when.
And to top it all off, my in-laws are coming Thursday through Saturday.
I'm starting to think drugs may be my only relief, :) JK
ACK, a full scale attack on unschooling! We must prepare for battle!
Wildflower
>From: "Ren Allen" <starsuncloud@...>_________________________________________________________________
>Reply-To: [email protected]
>To: [email protected]
>Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Re: dealing w/family
>Date: Tue, 21 Aug 2007 02:30:14 -0000
>
>~~The last time he stayed he put his
>hand on each of my kids heads and prayed for them while speaking in
>tongues~~
>
>And you let him??? How did your kids feel about that?
>
>I would think when he visits YOUR home, you should feel able to say
>"no thanks bro"....that's what respect is all about.
>
>Maybe you could throw in a pagan chant just to see how he reacts.;)
>
>Ren
>learninginfreedom.com
>
Tease your brain--play Clink! Win cool prizes!
http://club.live.com/clink.aspx?icid=clink_hotmailtextlink2
carenkh
I have consciously worked on finding the commonalities in messages...
if your daughters are OK with him doing this, in your mind, you can
hear it as "blessings be" or "Namaste" or "you girls rock!"; I think
it all means the same thing. I try to assign positive intent as much
as possible - what a gift that your brother cares about your
daughters! Now, if there was talk of how they'd be going to hell,
that would be stickier! But it would still, more than likely, be
coming from a place of caring for you, wanting the best for you. It's
just that his idea of best, and your ideas of best, are different.
Of course, this is seen from the outside - I'm not there to see how it
is, or feels. And I also know things are much trickier with family -
but thought I'd throw this out there.
Gassho ~
peace,
Caren
--- In [email protected], "Wildflower Car"
<unschoolfool@...> wrote:
if your daughters are OK with him doing this, in your mind, you can
hear it as "blessings be" or "Namaste" or "you girls rock!"; I think
it all means the same thing. I try to assign positive intent as much
as possible - what a gift that your brother cares about your
daughters! Now, if there was talk of how they'd be going to hell,
that would be stickier! But it would still, more than likely, be
coming from a place of caring for you, wanting the best for you. It's
just that his idea of best, and your ideas of best, are different.
Of course, this is seen from the outside - I'm not there to see how it
is, or feels. And I also know things are much trickier with family -
but thought I'd throw this out there.
Gassho ~
peace,
Caren
--- In [email protected], "Wildflower Car"
<unschoolfool@...> wrote:
>The last time he stayed he put his
> hand on each of my kids heads and prayed for them while speaking intongues
> and such.
Ren Allen
~~
LOL...the girls let him and then said never again, they are open ideas
and they're pretty good at saying what they feel and when.~~
Yeah, I think my older boys would have been like "what the heck are
you doing? Chill out!"
I think I've had enough negative experiences with that type of thing,
it probably colors my reactions. My focus would be letting my brother
know that he needs to get my children's permission before doing
anything like that! I also would make sure my children felt
comfortable expressing that to their uncle and being an advocate
should they not be able to speak up.
If they're ok with it. Fine. But people like that often have issues
with boundaries or he would have asked them if it was alright in the
first place. Or asked you. I think it's important to be an advocate
that way, especially in your very own home.
Don't talk about unschooling though. Just smother them with all this
joy and excitement about the cool things you've been doing and they
won't have time to question the homeschool thang.:)
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
LOL...the girls let him and then said never again, they are open ideas
and they're pretty good at saying what they feel and when.~~
Yeah, I think my older boys would have been like "what the heck are
you doing? Chill out!"
I think I've had enough negative experiences with that type of thing,
it probably colors my reactions. My focus would be letting my brother
know that he needs to get my children's permission before doing
anything like that! I also would make sure my children felt
comfortable expressing that to their uncle and being an advocate
should they not be able to speak up.
If they're ok with it. Fine. But people like that often have issues
with boundaries or he would have asked them if it was alright in the
first place. Or asked you. I think it's important to be an advocate
that way, especially in your very own home.
Don't talk about unschooling though. Just smother them with all this
joy and excitement about the cool things you've been doing and they
won't have time to question the homeschool thang.:)
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
Melissa
Last time I ate out with my (stepmom), i did this. Of course, we had
been NOT talking for a few months, so when she emailed to ask about
going out for dinner, i agreed with the caveat that there would be NO
discussions on my parenting, my lifestyle, or our homeschooling.
I just kept telling my mom all the fun and cool stuff the kids are
doing, and she seemed to follow my conditions okay. Just once when it
seemed the conversation was turning to our radical nature, I asked
how my (step)brother was doing. :-) The fact that he's 27, living at
home, doesn't help with anything, and is trying to fly under the
radar because he has three DUI's really argues the point that she
cannot complain about OUR lifestyle. At least my kids love to help me
out.
I think it does help to share all the positive stuff (and never once
mention struggles of any sort, I made the mistake of once saying how
tired I was...oh, they jump on that! "If you'd put them in school
you'd at least get some break") Grrr. like I'd put my kids in jail to
get a break.
Melissa
Mom to Josh (12), Breanna (10), Emily (8), Rachel (7), Sam (6), Dan
(4), and Avari Rose (19 months)
share our lives at
http://360.yahoo.com/multimomma
been NOT talking for a few months, so when she emailed to ask about
going out for dinner, i agreed with the caveat that there would be NO
discussions on my parenting, my lifestyle, or our homeschooling.
I just kept telling my mom all the fun and cool stuff the kids are
doing, and she seemed to follow my conditions okay. Just once when it
seemed the conversation was turning to our radical nature, I asked
how my (step)brother was doing. :-) The fact that he's 27, living at
home, doesn't help with anything, and is trying to fly under the
radar because he has three DUI's really argues the point that she
cannot complain about OUR lifestyle. At least my kids love to help me
out.
I think it does help to share all the positive stuff (and never once
mention struggles of any sort, I made the mistake of once saying how
tired I was...oh, they jump on that! "If you'd put them in school
you'd at least get some break") Grrr. like I'd put my kids in jail to
get a break.
Melissa
Mom to Josh (12), Breanna (10), Emily (8), Rachel (7), Sam (6), Dan
(4), and Avari Rose (19 months)
share our lives at
http://360.yahoo.com/multimomma
On Aug 21, 2007, at 8:19 AM, Ren Allen wrote:
>
>
> Don't talk about unschooling though. Just smother them with all this
> joy and excitement about the cool things you've been doing and they
> won't have time to question the homeschool thang.:)
>
> Ren
> learninginfreedom.com
>
>
>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Lisa
Repeat after me.... wow that's really kind that you are so concerned
about the children's education... please pass the bean dip.
Lisa Blocker
about the children's education... please pass the bean dip.
Lisa Blocker
Lisa
Caren,
My FIL frequently tells us we are going to hell... he isn't amused
by me asking him to save me a seat! HA! My girls have completely
been turned off of organized religion because of him and his extended
family (you know the type in church everytime the doors are open,
writing checks for any cause related to a church, but constantly judge
others, treat everyone around like crap and behave however they'd like
because I guess they are forgiven! UGH!) While I commend you for
having such a calm center and being able to see that things like
praying for the kids and even the going to hell comments might be
coming from a place of caring for my FIL it's about control... can I
make you do what I want because I am bigger, louder, the parent etc
etc. Nothing this man does is coming from a place other than his
desire to control everything and everyone around him. I do think
that most folks that offer a prayer, or express concern about
religious training for our children are expressing their concerns from
a place of love and caring. I feel much more respected by someone
who asks if they may pray for us than someone who says "if you prayed
hard enough or were a good enough Christian your autistic child with a
genetic syndrome would be healed" like my FIL is fond of doing. I
think the next time I will try inserting some of your words in his
mouth...sort of like subtitles.... hehehehe! Thanks for the
different perspective!
Lisa Blocker
My FIL frequently tells us we are going to hell... he isn't amused
by me asking him to save me a seat! HA! My girls have completely
been turned off of organized religion because of him and his extended
family (you know the type in church everytime the doors are open,
writing checks for any cause related to a church, but constantly judge
others, treat everyone around like crap and behave however they'd like
because I guess they are forgiven! UGH!) While I commend you for
having such a calm center and being able to see that things like
praying for the kids and even the going to hell comments might be
coming from a place of caring for my FIL it's about control... can I
make you do what I want because I am bigger, louder, the parent etc
etc. Nothing this man does is coming from a place other than his
desire to control everything and everyone around him. I do think
that most folks that offer a prayer, or express concern about
religious training for our children are expressing their concerns from
a place of love and caring. I feel much more respected by someone
who asks if they may pray for us than someone who says "if you prayed
hard enough or were a good enough Christian your autistic child with a
genetic syndrome would be healed" like my FIL is fond of doing. I
think the next time I will try inserting some of your words in his
mouth...sort of like subtitles.... hehehehe! Thanks for the
different perspective!
Lisa Blocker
>
> I have consciously worked on finding the commonalities in messages...
> if your daughters are OK with him doing this, in your mind, you can
> hear it as "blessings be" or "Namaste" or "you girls rock!"; I think
> it all means the same thing. I try to assign positive intent as much
> as possible - what a gift that your brother cares about your
> daughters! Now, if there was talk of how they'd be going to hell,
> that would be stickier! But it would still, more than likely, be
> coming from a place of caring for you, wanting the best for you. It's
> just that his idea of best, and your ideas of best, are different.
>
> Of course, this is seen from the outside - I'm not there to see how it
> is, or feels. And I also know things are much trickier with family -
> but thought I'd throw this out there.
>
> Gassho ~
>
> peace,
> Caren
Sylvia Toyama
I made the mistake of once saying how tired I was...oh, they jump on that! "If you'd put them in school you'd at least get some break") Grrr. like I'd put my kids in jail to
get a break.
Melissa
****
And, having had a child in school, I can honestly say the aggravaton and frustration I had to deal with then, was so completely exhausting and stressful I'd gladly take plain old tired any day!
Sylvia
---------------------------------
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
get a break.
Melissa
****
And, having had a child in school, I can honestly say the aggravaton and frustration I had to deal with then, was so completely exhausting and stressful I'd gladly take plain old tired any day!
Sylvia
---------------------------------
Got a little couch potato?
Check out fun summer activities for kids.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]