Seeking your advice and your wisdom
Tyra Olufemi
Below I will list a message that I have posted to the groups with
mix of hs/unschool styles. I am posting it hear completely willing
and open to unschool but I guess needing to find my security in it
again. I have pretty much unschooled...my children continue to
learn, but I still feel fearful that my older son is a late reader
and somehow I will be looked as having failed him if he does not get
the "basics." JUst keeping it real but truly wanting to find the
best way for us to do this. Thanks in advance for your responses.
Peace
Tyra
Peace to you all!
I seek balance in helping my son to learn. He started as a young
homeschooler. He turned 5 in September 05 and we semi-began in May
of that year (I began with my umbrella schools calendar and because
I knew we were moving sometime in September/Ocotober.)
I started out as a scared neophyte who merely did not want to fail
her child in his home education experience. QUICKLY we got burned
out. It was right around the time that I had been learning more
about unschooling. We moved at the end of Septemeber and that began
our unschooling experience for the next couple of months.
It was amazing because I pretty much went rad and did all I could to
lift arbitrary controls on them, especially with respect to watching
TV because I am pretty laidback regarding bedtime and eating anyway.
I have loved unschooling but the problem for me is making sure that
my husband's desires are met with respect to his children learning.
He would prefer school at home but has pretty much left it all up to
me.
So for my sons age 6 year/1st grade year, we have been laidback. We
have had a great time. I have also learned some things about me. I
can be very structured and I can get things done. Whatever I am
most interested in is what will draw me in. There are many times
when I find myself completly absorbed in working on my projects
(such as launching my online business). I don't particularly like
doing a lot of schoolish things anyway because he does not enjoy
them so we have not done a lot of structured learning in a
consistent way. I have decided that I don't feel comfortable
waiting for my son to learn to read in his own time. I don't want
to push him but reading and math have been subjects that I seek to
work with him on eventhough we usually did so in a nontraditional
way.
But our lives are getting a wee bit busier. Though I seek to scale
outside activities back, really we are happier when we do things on
the go. We do fieldtrips, hs pe, hs chess club and sometimes my son
will participate in a sport. I continue to work on my business and
am even going to work a few hours outside my home.
As a result, I thought it would be best to introduce a little
structure into what we do. I know my son is young, almost 7 yrs
old. I know he is a boy and boys learn best through movement. I
have gone out of my way to accomodate his kinesthetic style of
learning. We do an online reading program that is completely
interactive and the math program that I use is montessori based.
IF he was a little more motivated to do SOMETHING, ANYTHING to learn
to read and better understand math, I would not feel pressured to
carve out time (which is MAYBE an hour a day) to do these subjects.
Really, I feel pressure to make sure that he learns certain things.
And just to be clear, there is no doubt in me that he will
eventually be able to do all of this on his own. Howvever, given
this culture and my hubby's expectations, I truly feel like we need
to something more in a consistent manner than we have.
We have been doing math and reading everyday for MAYBE 2 weeks. I
think it is only a week and a half. I decided that we would SLOWLY
integrate doing these since we have not done much in the last month
or so. AGain, we are always learnng but maybe not actively engaged
in math and reading.
I am a mother who is obviously frustrated but also saddened because
I have gone out of my way to accomodate him. I am still willing to
do so but I am beginning to feel like a villan. He told me this
morning that he wants to go to school. I think to myself, "you HATE
school work so why would you want to go to school?"
Getting around to my questions: Are we normal? For those who are
more laidback in their approach to learning, what suggestions do you
have for helping me to go back to relaxing with a child who is not
schoolish? I remember a mother telling me that when her kids were
ages 5-7 they were hardest to homeschool because they are
transitioning from being self-centered (not in a bad way but based
on getting their needs met as an infant) to expanding their world
view a bit more. She said it was not her favorite time to
homeschool any of them. So for anyone, did you have a similar
experience during these ages? I guess I want to know if we are
normal and will just have to work through this?
Thanks to any for your wisdom and suggestions in advance!
Peacefully,
Tyra in Murfreesboro
mix of hs/unschool styles. I am posting it hear completely willing
and open to unschool but I guess needing to find my security in it
again. I have pretty much unschooled...my children continue to
learn, but I still feel fearful that my older son is a late reader
and somehow I will be looked as having failed him if he does not get
the "basics." JUst keeping it real but truly wanting to find the
best way for us to do this. Thanks in advance for your responses.
Peace
Tyra
Peace to you all!
I seek balance in helping my son to learn. He started as a young
homeschooler. He turned 5 in September 05 and we semi-began in May
of that year (I began with my umbrella schools calendar and because
I knew we were moving sometime in September/Ocotober.)
I started out as a scared neophyte who merely did not want to fail
her child in his home education experience. QUICKLY we got burned
out. It was right around the time that I had been learning more
about unschooling. We moved at the end of Septemeber and that began
our unschooling experience for the next couple of months.
It was amazing because I pretty much went rad and did all I could to
lift arbitrary controls on them, especially with respect to watching
TV because I am pretty laidback regarding bedtime and eating anyway.
I have loved unschooling but the problem for me is making sure that
my husband's desires are met with respect to his children learning.
He would prefer school at home but has pretty much left it all up to
me.
So for my sons age 6 year/1st grade year, we have been laidback. We
have had a great time. I have also learned some things about me. I
can be very structured and I can get things done. Whatever I am
most interested in is what will draw me in. There are many times
when I find myself completly absorbed in working on my projects
(such as launching my online business). I don't particularly like
doing a lot of schoolish things anyway because he does not enjoy
them so we have not done a lot of structured learning in a
consistent way. I have decided that I don't feel comfortable
waiting for my son to learn to read in his own time. I don't want
to push him but reading and math have been subjects that I seek to
work with him on eventhough we usually did so in a nontraditional
way.
But our lives are getting a wee bit busier. Though I seek to scale
outside activities back, really we are happier when we do things on
the go. We do fieldtrips, hs pe, hs chess club and sometimes my son
will participate in a sport. I continue to work on my business and
am even going to work a few hours outside my home.
As a result, I thought it would be best to introduce a little
structure into what we do. I know my son is young, almost 7 yrs
old. I know he is a boy and boys learn best through movement. I
have gone out of my way to accomodate his kinesthetic style of
learning. We do an online reading program that is completely
interactive and the math program that I use is montessori based.
IF he was a little more motivated to do SOMETHING, ANYTHING to learn
to read and better understand math, I would not feel pressured to
carve out time (which is MAYBE an hour a day) to do these subjects.
Really, I feel pressure to make sure that he learns certain things.
And just to be clear, there is no doubt in me that he will
eventually be able to do all of this on his own. Howvever, given
this culture and my hubby's expectations, I truly feel like we need
to something more in a consistent manner than we have.
We have been doing math and reading everyday for MAYBE 2 weeks. I
think it is only a week and a half. I decided that we would SLOWLY
integrate doing these since we have not done much in the last month
or so. AGain, we are always learnng but maybe not actively engaged
in math and reading.
I am a mother who is obviously frustrated but also saddened because
I have gone out of my way to accomodate him. I am still willing to
do so but I am beginning to feel like a villan. He told me this
morning that he wants to go to school. I think to myself, "you HATE
school work so why would you want to go to school?"
Getting around to my questions: Are we normal? For those who are
more laidback in their approach to learning, what suggestions do you
have for helping me to go back to relaxing with a child who is not
schoolish? I remember a mother telling me that when her kids were
ages 5-7 they were hardest to homeschool because they are
transitioning from being self-centered (not in a bad way but based
on getting their needs met as an infant) to expanding their world
view a bit more. She said it was not her favorite time to
homeschool any of them. So for anyone, did you have a similar
experience during these ages? I guess I want to know if we are
normal and will just have to work through this?
Thanks to any for your wisdom and suggestions in advance!
Peacefully,
Tyra in Murfreesboro
[email protected]
-----Original Message-----
From: Tyra Olufemi <motherspirit@...>
It was amazing because I pretty much went rad and did all I could to
lift arbitrary controls on them, especially with respect to watching
TV because I am pretty laidback regarding bedtime and eating anyway.
-=-=-=-=-
You weren't unschooling. You were just letting him be while you did
other things. Unschooling is about trusting that he will learn when he
is ready. That INCLUDES reading and math.
-=-=-=-=-
I have loved unschooling but the problem for me is making sure that
my husband's desires are met with respect to his children learning.
He would prefer school at home but has pretty much left it all up to
me.
-=-=-=-=-
Don't make this about your husband. It's not. It's about whether you
think your son will read on your schedule.
-==-=-=-=-
So for my sons age 6 year/1st grade year, we have been laidback. We
have had a great time. I have also learned some things about me. I
can be very structured and I can get things done. Whatever I am
most interested in is what will draw me in. There are many times
when I find myself completly absorbed in working on my projects
(such as launching my online business). I don't particularly like
doing a lot of schoolish things anyway because he does not enjoy
them so we have not done a lot of structured learning in a
consistent way.
-=-=-=-=-
So---it's OK for you to get drawn in my whatever you're most interested
in, but he doesn't get the same freedom?
He doesn't enjoy schoolish things---what *does* he enjoy? Maybe we can
show you the math and reading in what he DOES love to do. Then you can
relax.
-=-=-=-=-=-
I have decided that I don't feel comfortable
waiting for my son to learn to read in his own time. I don't want
to push him but reading and math have been subjects that I seek to
work with him on eventhough we usually did so in a nontraditional
way.
-=-=-=-=-
YOU don't feel comfortable.
If you don't believe he will, you're right. Buy a curriculum.
We used to talk about the paradigm shift here a lot. Until you can make
that shift, you will not be able to unschool.
-=-=-=-=-=-
As a result, I thought it would be best to introduce a little
structure into what we do. I know my son is young, almost 7 yrs
old. I know he is a boy and boys learn best through movement. I
have gone out of my way to accomodate his kinesthetic style of
learning. We do an online reading program that is completely
interactive and the math program that I use is montessori based.
-=-=-=-=-
Why are you looking to unschool? What do you think is so great about
it? You don't believe it---that learning happens naturally. Why are you
clinging to unschooling?
If you truly believe he needs to be reading at seven, buy the
curriculum, work with him every day, and believe you're teaching him to
read.
Seriously.
Unschooling isn't for everyone. Way too many parents believe that
reading and math programs will work. If you do, DO it. You really don't
have to unchool. There are zillions of curricula out there---there are
even public and private and parochial and Montessoori and
Waldorf/Steiner---all KINDS of schools as options. Unschooling may not
be the option for you.
-=-=-=-=-=-
IF he was a little more motivated to do SOMETHING, ANYTHING to learn
to read and better understand math, I would not feel pressured to
carve out time (which is MAYBE an hour a day) to do these subjects.
-=-=-=-=-
And I guess if you were a little more motivated to learn about
unschooling it would be working for you already. You're not ready.
I could push you and push you. I could make you read articles and
websites and books and elists and message boards and books and blogs.
But if you aren't motivated, it just doesn't matter how hard I push,
does it? I could make it fun: I could make it interactive! I could
print articles on brightly colored paper. We could talk about it while
we jogged or swam or gardened. Would that make it more palatable? We
could make it a computer game: I give multiple choice or true/false
questions---and gold stars for the right answers. Would that make you
learn about unschooling faster? I could compare you to other moms who
figured it out faster---accelerated unschoolers! Or put you in the
class for---"slow" learners so that we could work harder (every day for
an hour---one-on-one!) to get you to understand. I could find your
learning style and make sure we "taught" in the way you learned best.
Learning doesn't happen like that. *YOU* must be the motivated party.
He's not motivated yet---which means he's not ready.
He's only seven. When he's ten and still struggling, what will you do?
Send him to experts?
When he's ten and reading, will you congratulate yourself for having
taught him to read?
Did you do that when he learned to walk? You *did* teach him to walk,
right? Right at 12 months?
-=-=-=-=-=-
Really, I feel pressure to make sure that he learns certain things.
-=-=-=-=-=
From whom?
-=-=-=-=-
And just to be clear, there is no doubt in me that he will
eventually be able to do all of this on his own.
-=-=-=-=-=-
There *IS* doubt. BIG doubt. Don't kid yourself here. Go back and read
what you wrote. Lots and lots of doubt.
-=-=-=-=-=-
Howvever, given this culture and my hubby's expectations, I truly feel
like we need
to something more in a consistent manner than we have.
-=-=-=-=-
Then do that.
But you know what? We ALL live in this culture. The culture has nothing
to do with whether you understand the philosophy and how to implement
it.
-=-=-=-=-=-
We have been doing math and reading everyday for MAYBE 2 weeks. I
think it is only a week and a half. I decided that we would SLOWLY
integrate doing these since we have not done much in the last month
or so. AGain, we are always learnng but maybe not actively engaged
in math and reading.
--=-=-=-=-
You're kidding yourself again.---Unless you have him locked in a room
with no written words and nothing to count with---you plug his ears,
blindfold him, and bind his fingers and toes? <g> he IS actively
learning. You just need to start actually SEEING the learning.
-=-=-=-=-=-
I am a mother who is obviously frustrated but also saddened because
I have gone out of my way to accomodate him.
-=-=-=-
Yikes! He's your CHILD, and he's LEARNING. You're saddened because
you're going out of your way to "accomodate" him? He's seven, for
crying out loud!
-=-=-=-=-
I am still willing to do so but I am beginning to feel like a villan.
-=-=-=-=-=-
I don't understand. What do you think you are doing that's villanous?
What does your son think you're doing that's villanous?
-=-=-=-=-=-
He told me this morning that he wants to go to school. I think to
myself, "you HATE
school work so why would you want to go to school?"
-=-=-=-=-
No, he hates being having his mother as his teacher. A very common
problem in school-at-home families. Standards are high, pressure is
high, and child feels like crap because he can't please his own
mom---OR even complain to his mom and dad that his teacher sucks.
-=-=-=-=-=-
Getting around to my questions: Are we normal? For those who are
more laidback in their approach to learning, what suggestions do you
have for helping me to go back to relaxing with a child who is not
schoolish?
-=-=-=-=-=-
I'm not sure I understand what you're asking. You want him to be
"schoolish?"
How many of you unschoolers here have a "schoolish" child?
-=-=-=-=-
I remember a mother telling me that when her kids were
ages 5-7 they were hardest to homeschool because they are
transitioning from being self-centered (not in a bad way but based
on getting their needs met as an infant) to expanding their world
view a bit more.
-=-=-=-=-
No, they were having a hard time going from loved, cared-for *child* to
attacked, pressured *student*!
-=-=-=-=-
She said it was not her favorite time to homeschool any of them.
-=-===-
And as she believes, so shall it be.
-=-=-=-=-=-
So for anyone, did you have a similar experience during these ages?
-=-=-
No, because we weren't trying to school-at-home. We just kept living
rich, unschooled lives. Nothing changed.
Had I been pushing reading and math, we probably would have.
Not our reality though.
-=-=-=-=-
I guess I want to know if we are normal and will just have to work
through this?
-=-=-=-=-=-
Depends. Do you want to unschool or school-at-home?
If you choose to unschool, you will need to spend the next couple of
years DEschooling yourself before you can begin to unschool your son.
If you school-at-home, I'm guessing you're just hitting the absolute,
tiniest *tip* of the iceberg.
~Kelly
Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org
________________________________________________________________________
AOL now offers free email to everyone. Find out more about what's free
from AOL at AOL.com.
From: Tyra Olufemi <motherspirit@...>
It was amazing because I pretty much went rad and did all I could to
lift arbitrary controls on them, especially with respect to watching
TV because I am pretty laidback regarding bedtime and eating anyway.
-=-=-=-=-
You weren't unschooling. You were just letting him be while you did
other things. Unschooling is about trusting that he will learn when he
is ready. That INCLUDES reading and math.
-=-=-=-=-
I have loved unschooling but the problem for me is making sure that
my husband's desires are met with respect to his children learning.
He would prefer school at home but has pretty much left it all up to
me.
-=-=-=-=-
Don't make this about your husband. It's not. It's about whether you
think your son will read on your schedule.
-==-=-=-=-
So for my sons age 6 year/1st grade year, we have been laidback. We
have had a great time. I have also learned some things about me. I
can be very structured and I can get things done. Whatever I am
most interested in is what will draw me in. There are many times
when I find myself completly absorbed in working on my projects
(such as launching my online business). I don't particularly like
doing a lot of schoolish things anyway because he does not enjoy
them so we have not done a lot of structured learning in a
consistent way.
-=-=-=-=-
So---it's OK for you to get drawn in my whatever you're most interested
in, but he doesn't get the same freedom?
He doesn't enjoy schoolish things---what *does* he enjoy? Maybe we can
show you the math and reading in what he DOES love to do. Then you can
relax.
-=-=-=-=-=-
I have decided that I don't feel comfortable
waiting for my son to learn to read in his own time. I don't want
to push him but reading and math have been subjects that I seek to
work with him on eventhough we usually did so in a nontraditional
way.
-=-=-=-=-
YOU don't feel comfortable.
If you don't believe he will, you're right. Buy a curriculum.
We used to talk about the paradigm shift here a lot. Until you can make
that shift, you will not be able to unschool.
-=-=-=-=-=-
As a result, I thought it would be best to introduce a little
structure into what we do. I know my son is young, almost 7 yrs
old. I know he is a boy and boys learn best through movement. I
have gone out of my way to accomodate his kinesthetic style of
learning. We do an online reading program that is completely
interactive and the math program that I use is montessori based.
-=-=-=-=-
Why are you looking to unschool? What do you think is so great about
it? You don't believe it---that learning happens naturally. Why are you
clinging to unschooling?
If you truly believe he needs to be reading at seven, buy the
curriculum, work with him every day, and believe you're teaching him to
read.
Seriously.
Unschooling isn't for everyone. Way too many parents believe that
reading and math programs will work. If you do, DO it. You really don't
have to unchool. There are zillions of curricula out there---there are
even public and private and parochial and Montessoori and
Waldorf/Steiner---all KINDS of schools as options. Unschooling may not
be the option for you.
-=-=-=-=-=-
IF he was a little more motivated to do SOMETHING, ANYTHING to learn
to read and better understand math, I would not feel pressured to
carve out time (which is MAYBE an hour a day) to do these subjects.
-=-=-=-=-
And I guess if you were a little more motivated to learn about
unschooling it would be working for you already. You're not ready.
I could push you and push you. I could make you read articles and
websites and books and elists and message boards and books and blogs.
But if you aren't motivated, it just doesn't matter how hard I push,
does it? I could make it fun: I could make it interactive! I could
print articles on brightly colored paper. We could talk about it while
we jogged or swam or gardened. Would that make it more palatable? We
could make it a computer game: I give multiple choice or true/false
questions---and gold stars for the right answers. Would that make you
learn about unschooling faster? I could compare you to other moms who
figured it out faster---accelerated unschoolers! Or put you in the
class for---"slow" learners so that we could work harder (every day for
an hour---one-on-one!) to get you to understand. I could find your
learning style and make sure we "taught" in the way you learned best.
Learning doesn't happen like that. *YOU* must be the motivated party.
He's not motivated yet---which means he's not ready.
He's only seven. When he's ten and still struggling, what will you do?
Send him to experts?
When he's ten and reading, will you congratulate yourself for having
taught him to read?
Did you do that when he learned to walk? You *did* teach him to walk,
right? Right at 12 months?
-=-=-=-=-=-
Really, I feel pressure to make sure that he learns certain things.
-=-=-=-=-=
From whom?
-=-=-=-=-
And just to be clear, there is no doubt in me that he will
eventually be able to do all of this on his own.
-=-=-=-=-=-
There *IS* doubt. BIG doubt. Don't kid yourself here. Go back and read
what you wrote. Lots and lots of doubt.
-=-=-=-=-=-
Howvever, given this culture and my hubby's expectations, I truly feel
like we need
to something more in a consistent manner than we have.
-=-=-=-=-
Then do that.
But you know what? We ALL live in this culture. The culture has nothing
to do with whether you understand the philosophy and how to implement
it.
-=-=-=-=-=-
We have been doing math and reading everyday for MAYBE 2 weeks. I
think it is only a week and a half. I decided that we would SLOWLY
integrate doing these since we have not done much in the last month
or so. AGain, we are always learnng but maybe not actively engaged
in math and reading.
--=-=-=-=-
You're kidding yourself again.---Unless you have him locked in a room
with no written words and nothing to count with---you plug his ears,
blindfold him, and bind his fingers and toes? <g> he IS actively
learning. You just need to start actually SEEING the learning.
-=-=-=-=-=-
I am a mother who is obviously frustrated but also saddened because
I have gone out of my way to accomodate him.
-=-=-=-
Yikes! He's your CHILD, and he's LEARNING. You're saddened because
you're going out of your way to "accomodate" him? He's seven, for
crying out loud!
-=-=-=-=-
I am still willing to do so but I am beginning to feel like a villan.
-=-=-=-=-=-
I don't understand. What do you think you are doing that's villanous?
What does your son think you're doing that's villanous?
-=-=-=-=-=-
He told me this morning that he wants to go to school. I think to
myself, "you HATE
school work so why would you want to go to school?"
-=-=-=-=-
No, he hates being having his mother as his teacher. A very common
problem in school-at-home families. Standards are high, pressure is
high, and child feels like crap because he can't please his own
mom---OR even complain to his mom and dad that his teacher sucks.
-=-=-=-=-=-
Getting around to my questions: Are we normal? For those who are
more laidback in their approach to learning, what suggestions do you
have for helping me to go back to relaxing with a child who is not
schoolish?
-=-=-=-=-=-
I'm not sure I understand what you're asking. You want him to be
"schoolish?"
How many of you unschoolers here have a "schoolish" child?
-=-=-=-=-
I remember a mother telling me that when her kids were
ages 5-7 they were hardest to homeschool because they are
transitioning from being self-centered (not in a bad way but based
on getting their needs met as an infant) to expanding their world
view a bit more.
-=-=-=-=-
No, they were having a hard time going from loved, cared-for *child* to
attacked, pressured *student*!
-=-=-=-=-
She said it was not her favorite time to homeschool any of them.
-=-===-
And as she believes, so shall it be.
-=-=-=-=-=-
So for anyone, did you have a similar experience during these ages?
-=-=-
No, because we weren't trying to school-at-home. We just kept living
rich, unschooled lives. Nothing changed.
Had I been pushing reading and math, we probably would have.
Not our reality though.
-=-=-=-=-
I guess I want to know if we are normal and will just have to work
through this?
-=-=-=-=-=-
Depends. Do you want to unschool or school-at-home?
If you choose to unschool, you will need to spend the next couple of
years DEschooling yourself before you can begin to unschool your son.
If you school-at-home, I'm guessing you're just hitting the absolute,
tiniest *tip* of the iceberg.
~Kelly
Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org
________________________________________________________________________
AOL now offers free email to everyone. Find out more about what's free
from AOL at AOL.com.
Janet
At 01:36 PM 8/8/2007, you wrote:
does lessons or anything like that. They would rebel big time if I
pulled out workbooks LOL, and that's just fine with me! ;-) They
learn - when they are ready. I've seen that work too many times to
worry about it. I did try those "lessons" at home - 20 years ago.
Lasted ... maybe a week?!
Janet in MN
>How many of you unschoolers here have a "schoolish" child?Pfffft. LOL. 6 kids - all UNschooled, and not a one is "schoolish" or
does lessons or anything like that. They would rebel big time if I
pulled out workbooks LOL, and that's just fine with me! ;-) They
learn - when they are ready. I've seen that work too many times to
worry about it. I did try those "lessons" at home - 20 years ago.
Lasted ... maybe a week?!
Janet in MN
Brian & Alexandra Polikowsky
Janet where in MN do you live??
Alex in MN
Alex in MN
----- Original Message -----
From: Janet
To: [email protected]
Sent: Wednesday, August 08, 2007 2:04 PM
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] Seeking your advice and your wisdom
At 01:36 PM 8/8/2007, you wrote:
>How many of you unschoolers here have a "schoolish" child?
Pfffft. LOL. 6 kids - all UNschooled, and not a one is "schoolish" or
does lessons or anything like that. They would rebel big time if I
pulled out workbooks LOL, and that's just fine with me! ;-) They
learn - when they are ready. I've seen that work too many times to
worry about it. I did try those "lessons" at home - 20 years ago.
Lasted ... maybe a week?!
Janet in MN
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Tyra-Goddess-Body-Mind-Spirit.com
Ouch, Kelly. But thanks. You have given me a lot to think about.
Peace and Love
Tyra
From: kbcdlovejo@...
Date: 2007/08/08 Wed PM 01:36:57 CDT
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] Seeking your advice and your wisdom
-----Original Message-----
From: Tyra Olufemi <motherspirit@...>
It was amazing because I pretty much went rad and did all I could to
lift arbitrary controls on them, especially with respect to watching
TV because I am pretty laidback regarding bedtime and eating anyway.
-=-=-=-=-
You weren't unschooling. You were just letting him be while you did
other things. Unschooling is about trusting that he will learn when he
is ready. That INCLUDES reading and math.
-=-=-=-=-
I have loved unschooling but the problem for me is making sure that
my husband's desires are met with respect to his children learning.
He would prefer school at home but has pretty much left it all up to
me.
-=-=-=-=-
Don't make this about your husband. It's not. It's about whether you
think your son will read on your schedule.
-==-=-=-=-
So for my sons age 6 year/1st grade year, we have been laidback. We
have had a great time. I have also learned some things about me. I
can be very structured and I can get things done. Whatever I am
most interested in is what will draw me in. There are many times
when I find myself completly absorbed in working on my projects
(such as launching my online business). I don't particularly like
doing a lot of schoolish things anyway because he does not enjoy
them so we have not done a lot of structured learning in a
consistent way.
-=-=-=-=-
So---it's OK for you to get drawn in my whatever you're most interested
in, but he doesn't get the same freedom?
He doesn't enjoy schoolish things---what *does* he enjoy? Maybe we can
show you the math and reading in what he DOES love to do. Then you can
relax.
-=-=-=-=-=-
I have decided that I don't feel comfortable
waiting for my son to learn to read in his own time. I don't want
to push him but reading and math have been subjects that I seek to
work with him on eventhough we usually did so in a nontraditional
way.
-=-=-=-=-
YOU don't feel comfortable.
If you don't believe he will, you're right. Buy a curriculum.
We used to talk about the paradigm shift here a lot. Until you can make
that shift, you will not be able to unschool.
-=-=-=-=-=-
As a result, I thought it would be best to introduce a little
structure into what we do. I know my son is young, almost 7 yrs
old. I know he is a boy and boys learn best through movement. I
have gone out of my way to accomodate his kinesthetic style of
learning. We do an online reading program that is completely
interactive and the math program that I use is montessori based.
-=-=-=-=-
Why are you looking to unschool? What do you think is so great about
it? You don't believe it---that learning happens naturally. Why are you
clinging to unschooling?
If you truly believe he needs to be reading at seven, buy the
curriculum, work with him every day, and believe you're teaching him to
read.
Seriously.
Unschooling isn't for everyone. Way too many parents believe that
reading and math programs will work. If you do, DO it. You really don't
have to unchool. There are zillions of curricula out there---there are
even public and private and parochial and Montessoori and
Waldorf/Steiner---all KINDS of schools as options. Unschooling may not
be the option for you.
-=-=-=-=-=-
IF he was a little more motivated to do SOMETHING, ANYTHING to learn
to read and better understand math, I would not feel pressured to
carve out time (which is MAYBE an hour a day) to do these subjects.
-=-=-=-=-
And I guess if you were a little more motivated to learn about
unschooling it would be working for you already. You're not ready.
I could push you and push you. I could make you read articles and
websites and books and elists and message boards and books and blogs.
But if you aren't motivated, it just doesn't matter how hard I push,
does it? I could make it fun: I could make it interactive! I could
print articles on brightly colored paper. We could talk about it while
we jogged or swam or gardened. Would that make it more palatable? We
could make it a computer game: I give multiple choice or true/false
questions---and gold stars for the right answers. Would that make you
learn about unschooling faster? I could compare you to other moms who
figured it out faster---accelerated unschoolers! Or put you in the
class for---"slow" learners so that we could work harder (every day for
an hour---one-on-one!) to get you to understand. I could find your
learning style and make sure we "taught" in the way you learned best.
Learning doesn't happen like that. *YOU* must be the motivated party.
He's not motivated yet---which means he's not ready.
He's only seven. When he's ten and still struggling, what will you do?
Send him to experts?
When he's ten and reading, will you congratulate yourself for having
taught him to read?
Did you do that when he learned to walk? You *did* teach him to walk,
right? Right at 12 months?
-=-=-=-=-=-
Really, I feel pressure to make sure that he learns certain things.
-=-=-=-=-=
From whom?
-=-=-=-=-
And just to be clear, there is no doubt in me that he will
eventually be able to do all of this on his own.
-=-=-=-=-=-
There *IS* doubt. BIG doubt. Don't kid yourself here. Go back and read
what you wrote. Lots and lots of doubt.
-=-=-=-=-=-
Howvever, given this culture and my hubby's expectations, I truly feel
like we need
to something more in a consistent manner than we have.
-=-=-=-=-
Then do that.
But you know what? We ALL live in this culture. The culture has nothing
to do with whether you understand the philosophy and how to implement
it.
-=-=-=-=-=-
We have been doing math and reading everyday for MAYBE 2 weeks. I
think it is only a week and a half. I decided that we would SLOWLY
integrate doing these since we have not done much in the last month
or so. AGain, we are always learnng but maybe not actively engaged
in math and reading.
--=-=-=-=-
You're kidding yourself again.---Unless you have him locked in a room
with no written words and nothing to count with---you plug his ears,
blindfold him, and bind his fingers and toes? <g> he IS actively
learning. You just need to start actually SEEING the learning.
-=-=-=-=-=-
I am a mother who is obviously frustrated but also saddened because
I have gone out of my way to accomodate him.
-=-=-=-
Yikes! He's your CHILD, and he's LEARNING. You're saddened because
you're going out of your way to "accomodate" him? He's seven, for
crying out loud!
-=-=-=-=-
I am still willing to do so but I am beginning to feel like a villan.
-=-=-=-=-=-
I don't understand. What do you think you are doing that's villanous?
What does your son think you're doing that's villanous?
-=-=-=-=-=-
He told me this morning that he wants to go to school. I think to
myself, "you HATE
school work so why would you want to go to school?"
-=-=-=-=-
No, he hates being having his mother as his teacher. A very common
problem in school-at-home families. Standards are high, pressure is
high, and child feels like crap because he can't please his own
mom---OR even complain to his mom and dad that his teacher sucks.
-=-=-=-=-=-
Getting around to my questions: Are we normal? For those who are
more laidback in their approach to learning, what suggestions do you
have for helping me to go back to relaxing with a child who is not
schoolish?
-=-=-=-=-=-
I'm not sure I understand what you're asking. You want him to be
"schoolish?"
How many of you unschoolers here have a "schoolish" child?
-=-=-=-=-
I remember a mother telling me that when her kids were
ages 5-7 they were hardest to homeschool because they are
transitioning from being self-centered (not in a bad way but based
on getting their needs met as an infant) to expanding their world
view a bit more.
-=-=-=-=-
No, they were having a hard time going from loved, cared-for *child* to
attacked, pressured *student*!
-=-=-=-=-
She said it was not her favorite time to homeschool any of them.
-=-===-
And as she believes, so shall it be.
-=-=-=-=-=-
So for anyone, did you have a similar experience during these ages?
-=-=-
No, because we weren't trying to school-at-home. We just kept living
rich, unschooled lives. Nothing changed.
Had I been pushing reading and math, we probably would have.
Not our reality though.
-=-=-=-=-
I guess I want to know if we are normal and will just have to work
through this?
-=-=-=-=-=-
Depends. Do you want to unschool or school-at-home?
If you choose to unschool, you will need to spend the next couple of
years DEschooling yourself before you can begin to unschool your son.
If you school-at-home, I'm guessing you're just hitting the absolute,
tiniest *tip* of the iceberg.
~Kelly
Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org
________________________________________________________________________
AOL now offers free email to everyone. Find out more about what's free
from AOL at AOL.com.
Peace and Love
Tyra
From: kbcdlovejo@...
Date: 2007/08/08 Wed PM 01:36:57 CDT
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] Seeking your advice and your wisdom
-----Original Message-----
From: Tyra Olufemi <motherspirit@...>
It was amazing because I pretty much went rad and did all I could to
lift arbitrary controls on them, especially with respect to watching
TV because I am pretty laidback regarding bedtime and eating anyway.
-=-=-=-=-
You weren't unschooling. You were just letting him be while you did
other things. Unschooling is about trusting that he will learn when he
is ready. That INCLUDES reading and math.
-=-=-=-=-
I have loved unschooling but the problem for me is making sure that
my husband's desires are met with respect to his children learning.
He would prefer school at home but has pretty much left it all up to
me.
-=-=-=-=-
Don't make this about your husband. It's not. It's about whether you
think your son will read on your schedule.
-==-=-=-=-
So for my sons age 6 year/1st grade year, we have been laidback. We
have had a great time. I have also learned some things about me. I
can be very structured and I can get things done. Whatever I am
most interested in is what will draw me in. There are many times
when I find myself completly absorbed in working on my projects
(such as launching my online business). I don't particularly like
doing a lot of schoolish things anyway because he does not enjoy
them so we have not done a lot of structured learning in a
consistent way.
-=-=-=-=-
So---it's OK for you to get drawn in my whatever you're most interested
in, but he doesn't get the same freedom?
He doesn't enjoy schoolish things---what *does* he enjoy? Maybe we can
show you the math and reading in what he DOES love to do. Then you can
relax.
-=-=-=-=-=-
I have decided that I don't feel comfortable
waiting for my son to learn to read in his own time. I don't want
to push him but reading and math have been subjects that I seek to
work with him on eventhough we usually did so in a nontraditional
way.
-=-=-=-=-
YOU don't feel comfortable.
If you don't believe he will, you're right. Buy a curriculum.
We used to talk about the paradigm shift here a lot. Until you can make
that shift, you will not be able to unschool.
-=-=-=-=-=-
As a result, I thought it would be best to introduce a little
structure into what we do. I know my son is young, almost 7 yrs
old. I know he is a boy and boys learn best through movement. I
have gone out of my way to accomodate his kinesthetic style of
learning. We do an online reading program that is completely
interactive and the math program that I use is montessori based.
-=-=-=-=-
Why are you looking to unschool? What do you think is so great about
it? You don't believe it---that learning happens naturally. Why are you
clinging to unschooling?
If you truly believe he needs to be reading at seven, buy the
curriculum, work with him every day, and believe you're teaching him to
read.
Seriously.
Unschooling isn't for everyone. Way too many parents believe that
reading and math programs will work. If you do, DO it. You really don't
have to unchool. There are zillions of curricula out there---there are
even public and private and parochial and Montessoori and
Waldorf/Steiner---all KINDS of schools as options. Unschooling may not
be the option for you.
-=-=-=-=-=-
IF he was a little more motivated to do SOMETHING, ANYTHING to learn
to read and better understand math, I would not feel pressured to
carve out time (which is MAYBE an hour a day) to do these subjects.
-=-=-=-=-
And I guess if you were a little more motivated to learn about
unschooling it would be working for you already. You're not ready.
I could push you and push you. I could make you read articles and
websites and books and elists and message boards and books and blogs.
But if you aren't motivated, it just doesn't matter how hard I push,
does it? I could make it fun: I could make it interactive! I could
print articles on brightly colored paper. We could talk about it while
we jogged or swam or gardened. Would that make it more palatable? We
could make it a computer game: I give multiple choice or true/false
questions---and gold stars for the right answers. Would that make you
learn about unschooling faster? I could compare you to other moms who
figured it out faster---accelerated unschoolers! Or put you in the
class for---"slow" learners so that we could work harder (every day for
an hour---one-on-one!) to get you to understand. I could find your
learning style and make sure we "taught" in the way you learned best.
Learning doesn't happen like that. *YOU* must be the motivated party.
He's not motivated yet---which means he's not ready.
He's only seven. When he's ten and still struggling, what will you do?
Send him to experts?
When he's ten and reading, will you congratulate yourself for having
taught him to read?
Did you do that when he learned to walk? You *did* teach him to walk,
right? Right at 12 months?
-=-=-=-=-=-
Really, I feel pressure to make sure that he learns certain things.
-=-=-=-=-=
From whom?
-=-=-=-=-
And just to be clear, there is no doubt in me that he will
eventually be able to do all of this on his own.
-=-=-=-=-=-
There *IS* doubt. BIG doubt. Don't kid yourself here. Go back and read
what you wrote. Lots and lots of doubt.
-=-=-=-=-=-
Howvever, given this culture and my hubby's expectations, I truly feel
like we need
to something more in a consistent manner than we have.
-=-=-=-=-
Then do that.
But you know what? We ALL live in this culture. The culture has nothing
to do with whether you understand the philosophy and how to implement
it.
-=-=-=-=-=-
We have been doing math and reading everyday for MAYBE 2 weeks. I
think it is only a week and a half. I decided that we would SLOWLY
integrate doing these since we have not done much in the last month
or so. AGain, we are always learnng but maybe not actively engaged
in math and reading.
--=-=-=-=-
You're kidding yourself again.---Unless you have him locked in a room
with no written words and nothing to count with---you plug his ears,
blindfold him, and bind his fingers and toes? <g> he IS actively
learning. You just need to start actually SEEING the learning.
-=-=-=-=-=-
I am a mother who is obviously frustrated but also saddened because
I have gone out of my way to accomodate him.
-=-=-=-
Yikes! He's your CHILD, and he's LEARNING. You're saddened because
you're going out of your way to "accomodate" him? He's seven, for
crying out loud!
-=-=-=-=-
I am still willing to do so but I am beginning to feel like a villan.
-=-=-=-=-=-
I don't understand. What do you think you are doing that's villanous?
What does your son think you're doing that's villanous?
-=-=-=-=-=-
He told me this morning that he wants to go to school. I think to
myself, "you HATE
school work so why would you want to go to school?"
-=-=-=-=-
No, he hates being having his mother as his teacher. A very common
problem in school-at-home families. Standards are high, pressure is
high, and child feels like crap because he can't please his own
mom---OR even complain to his mom and dad that his teacher sucks.
-=-=-=-=-=-
Getting around to my questions: Are we normal? For those who are
more laidback in their approach to learning, what suggestions do you
have for helping me to go back to relaxing with a child who is not
schoolish?
-=-=-=-=-=-
I'm not sure I understand what you're asking. You want him to be
"schoolish?"
How many of you unschoolers here have a "schoolish" child?
-=-=-=-=-
I remember a mother telling me that when her kids were
ages 5-7 they were hardest to homeschool because they are
transitioning from being self-centered (not in a bad way but based
on getting their needs met as an infant) to expanding their world
view a bit more.
-=-=-=-=-
No, they were having a hard time going from loved, cared-for *child* to
attacked, pressured *student*!
-=-=-=-=-
She said it was not her favorite time to homeschool any of them.
-=-===-
And as she believes, so shall it be.
-=-=-=-=-=-
So for anyone, did you have a similar experience during these ages?
-=-=-
No, because we weren't trying to school-at-home. We just kept living
rich, unschooled lives. Nothing changed.
Had I been pushing reading and math, we probably would have.
Not our reality though.
-=-=-=-=-
I guess I want to know if we are normal and will just have to work
through this?
-=-=-=-=-=-
Depends. Do you want to unschool or school-at-home?
If you choose to unschool, you will need to spend the next couple of
years DEschooling yourself before you can begin to unschool your son.
If you school-at-home, I'm guessing you're just hitting the absolute,
tiniest *tip* of the iceberg.
~Kelly
Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org
________________________________________________________________________
AOL now offers free email to everyone. Find out more about what's free
from AOL at AOL.com.
Tyra-Goddess-Body-Mind-Spirit.com
I may have asked the wrong question. I think I meant something else but don't know what. Thanks for you input, though.
Peace
Tyra
From: Janet <janeteg@...>
Date: 2007/08/08 Wed PM 02:04:36 CDT
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] Seeking your advice and your wisdom
At 01:36 PM 8/8/2007, you wrote:
does lessons or anything like that. They would rebel big time if I
pulled out workbooks LOL, and that's just fine with me! ;-) They
learn - when they are ready. I've seen that work too many times to
worry about it. I did try those "lessons" at home - 20 years ago.
Lasted ... maybe a week?!
Janet in MN
Peace
Tyra
From: Janet <janeteg@...>
Date: 2007/08/08 Wed PM 02:04:36 CDT
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] Seeking your advice and your wisdom
At 01:36 PM 8/8/2007, you wrote:
>How many of you unschoolers here have a "schoolish" child?Pfffft. LOL. 6 kids - all UNschooled, and not a one is "schoolish" or
does lessons or anything like that. They would rebel big time if I
pulled out workbooks LOL, and that's just fine with me! ;-) They
learn - when they are ready. I've seen that work too many times to
worry about it. I did try those "lessons" at home - 20 years ago.
Lasted ... maybe a week?!
Janet in MN
Tyra-Goddess-Body-Mind-Spirit.com
You know, sometimes we know and believe but we forget. I think that is what has happened to me. As I have pondered responses that I have received from my different groups, I think to myself that I need to get a bit more simplicity in my life. I decided to homeschool him the first year that we started this learning at home thing. It was after the utter failure of my schoolish approach. But my life was way more simple and so I could see that he was learning.
I still stand true that I do reside in insecurity. What I gained for your words, Kelly, is to not scapegoat an take responsibility for what is really going on. The truth is that I fear that I will fail at unschooling. I am also clear that I fear having fingers point at me saying that I failed in some way. All of this coupled with my busy-ness makes me want to do more structured things so that I can have a peace of mind that we are at least doing something.
So now I am off to ponder and determine how to integrate more simplicity so that I CAN see that my children are learning.
Peace and thanks again
Tyra
From: kbcdlovejo@...
Date: 2007/08/08 Wed PM 01:36:57 CDT
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] Seeking your advice and your wisdom
-----Original Message-----
From: Tyra Olufemi <motherspirit@...>
It was amazing because I pretty much went rad and did all I could to
lift arbitrary controls on them, especially with respect to watching
TV because I am pretty laidback regarding bedtime and eating anyway.
-=-=-=-=-
You weren't unschooling. You were just letting him be while you did
other things. Unschooling is about trusting that he will learn when he
is ready. That INCLUDES reading and math.
-=-=-=-=-
I have loved unschooling but the problem for me is making sure that
my husband's desires are met with respect to his children learning.
He would prefer school at home but has pretty much left it all up to
me.
-=-=-=-=-
Don't make this about your husband. It's not. It's about whether you
think your son will read on your schedule.
-==-=-=-=-
So for my sons age 6 year/1st grade year, we have been laidback. We
have had a great time. I have also learned some things about me. I
can be very structured and I can get things done. Whatever I am
most interested in is what will draw me in. There are many times
when I find myself completly absorbed in working on my projects
(such as launching my online business). I don't particularly like
doing a lot of schoolish things anyway because he does not enjoy
them so we have not done a lot of structured learning in a
consistent way.
-=-=-=-=-
So---it's OK for you to get drawn in my whatever you're most interested
in, but he doesn't get the same freedom?
He doesn't enjoy schoolish things---what *does* he enjoy? Maybe we can
show you the math and reading in what he DOES love to do. Then you can
relax.
-=-=-=-=-=-
I have decided that I don't feel comfortable
waiting for my son to learn to read in his own time. I don't want
to push him but reading and math have been subjects that I seek to
work with him on eventhough we usually did so in a nontraditional
way.
-=-=-=-=-
YOU don't feel comfortable.
If you don't believe he will, you're right. Buy a curriculum.
We used to talk about the paradigm shift here a lot. Until you can make
that shift, you will not be able to unschool.
-=-=-=-=-=-
As a result, I thought it would be best to introduce a little
structure into what we do. I know my son is young, almost 7 yrs
old. I know he is a boy and boys learn best through movement. I
have gone out of my way to accomodate his kinesthetic style of
learning. We do an online reading program that is completely
interactive and the math program that I use is montessori based.
-=-=-=-=-
Why are you looking to unschool? What do you think is so great about
it? You don't believe it---that learning happens naturally. Why are you
clinging to unschooling?
If you truly believe he needs to be reading at seven, buy the
curriculum, work with him every day, and believe you're teaching him to
read.
Seriously.
Unschooling isn't for everyone. Way too many parents believe that
reading and math programs will work. If you do, DO it. You really don't
have to unchool. There are zillions of curricula out there---there are
even public and private and parochial and Montessoori and
Waldorf/Steiner---all KINDS of schools as options. Unschooling may not
be the option for you.
-=-=-=-=-=-
IF he was a little more motivated to do SOMETHING, ANYTHING to learn
to read and better understand math, I would not feel pressured to
carve out time (which is MAYBE an hour a day) to do these subjects.
-=-=-=-=-
And I guess if you were a little more motivated to learn about
unschooling it would be working for you already. You're not ready.
I could push you and push you. I could make you read articles and
websites and books and elists and message boards and books and blogs.
But if you aren't motivated, it just doesn't matter how hard I push,
does it? I could make it fun: I could make it interactive! I could
print articles on brightly colored paper. We could talk about it while
we jogged or swam or gardened. Would that make it more palatable? We
could make it a computer game: I give multiple choice or true/false
questions---and gold stars for the right answers. Would that make you
learn about unschooling faster? I could compare you to other moms who
figured it out faster---accelerated unschoolers! Or put you in the
class for---"slow" learners so that we could work harder (every day for
an hour---one-on-one!) to get you to understand. I could find your
learning style and make sure we "taught" in the way you learned best.
Learning doesn't happen like that. *YOU* must be the motivated party.
He's not motivated yet---which means he's not ready.
He's only seven. When he's ten and still struggling, what will you do?
Send him to experts?
When he's ten and reading, will you congratulate yourself for having
taught him to read?
Did you do that when he learned to walk? You *did* teach him to walk,
right? Right at 12 months?
-=-=-=-=-=-
Really, I feel pressure to make sure that he learns certain things.
-=-=-=-=-=
From whom?
-=-=-=-=-
And just to be clear, there is no doubt in me that he will
eventually be able to do all of this on his own.
-=-=-=-=-=-
There *IS* doubt. BIG doubt. Don't kid yourself here. Go back and read
what you wrote. Lots and lots of doubt.
-=-=-=-=-=-
Howvever, given this culture and my hubby's expectations, I truly feel
like we need
to something more in a consistent manner than we have.
-=-=-=-=-
Then do that.
But you know what? We ALL live in this culture. The culture has nothing
to do with whether you understand the philosophy and how to implement
it.
-=-=-=-=-=-
We have been doing math and reading everyday for MAYBE 2 weeks. I
think it is only a week and a half. I decided that we would SLOWLY
integrate doing these since we have not done much in the last month
or so. AGain, we are always learnng but maybe not actively engaged
in math and reading.
--=-=-=-=-
You're kidding yourself again.---Unless you have him locked in a room
with no written words and nothing to count with---you plug his ears,
blindfold him, and bind his fingers and toes? <g> he IS actively
learning. You just need to start actually SEEING the learning.
-=-=-=-=-=-
I am a mother who is obviously frustrated but also saddened because
I have gone out of my way to accomodate him.
-=-=-=-
Yikes! He's your CHILD, and he's LEARNING. You're saddened because
you're going out of your way to "accomodate" him? He's seven, for
crying out loud!
-=-=-=-=-
I am still willing to do so but I am beginning to feel like a villan.
-=-=-=-=-=-
I don't understand. What do you think you are doing that's villanous?
What does your son think you're doing that's villanous?
-=-=-=-=-=-
He told me this morning that he wants to go to school. I think to
myself, "you HATE
school work so why would you want to go to school?"
-=-=-=-=-
No, he hates being having his mother as his teacher. A very common
problem in school-at-home families. Standards are high, pressure is
high, and child feels like crap because he can't please his own
mom---OR even complain to his mom and dad that his teacher sucks.
-=-=-=-=-=-
Getting around to my questions: Are we normal? For those who are
more laidback in their approach to learning, what suggestions do you
have for helping me to go back to relaxing with a child who is not
schoolish?
-=-=-=-=-=-
I'm not sure I understand what you're asking. You want him to be
"schoolish?"
How many of you unschoolers here have a "schoolish" child?
-=-=-=-=-
I remember a mother telling me that when her kids were
ages 5-7 they were hardest to homeschool because they are
transitioning from being self-centered (not in a bad way but based
on getting their needs met as an infant) to expanding their world
view a bit more.
-=-=-=-=-
No, they were having a hard time going from loved, cared-for *child* to
attacked, pressured *student*!
-=-=-=-=-
She said it was not her favorite time to homeschool any of them.
-=-===-
And as she believes, so shall it be.
-=-=-=-=-=-
So for anyone, did you have a similar experience during these ages?
-=-=-
No, because we weren't trying to school-at-home. We just kept living
rich, unschooled lives. Nothing changed.
Had I been pushing reading and math, we probably would have.
Not our reality though.
-=-=-=-=-
I guess I want to know if we are normal and will just have to work
through this?
-=-=-=-=-=-
Depends. Do you want to unschool or school-at-home?
If you choose to unschool, you will need to spend the next couple of
years DEschooling yourself before you can begin to unschool your son.
If you school-at-home, I'm guessing you're just hitting the absolute,
tiniest *tip* of the iceberg.
~Kelly
Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org
________________________________________________________________________
AOL now offers free email to everyone. Find out more about what's free
from AOL at AOL.com.
I still stand true that I do reside in insecurity. What I gained for your words, Kelly, is to not scapegoat an take responsibility for what is really going on. The truth is that I fear that I will fail at unschooling. I am also clear that I fear having fingers point at me saying that I failed in some way. All of this coupled with my busy-ness makes me want to do more structured things so that I can have a peace of mind that we are at least doing something.
So now I am off to ponder and determine how to integrate more simplicity so that I CAN see that my children are learning.
Peace and thanks again
Tyra
From: kbcdlovejo@...
Date: 2007/08/08 Wed PM 01:36:57 CDT
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] Seeking your advice and your wisdom
-----Original Message-----
From: Tyra Olufemi <motherspirit@...>
It was amazing because I pretty much went rad and did all I could to
lift arbitrary controls on them, especially with respect to watching
TV because I am pretty laidback regarding bedtime and eating anyway.
-=-=-=-=-
You weren't unschooling. You were just letting him be while you did
other things. Unschooling is about trusting that he will learn when he
is ready. That INCLUDES reading and math.
-=-=-=-=-
I have loved unschooling but the problem for me is making sure that
my husband's desires are met with respect to his children learning.
He would prefer school at home but has pretty much left it all up to
me.
-=-=-=-=-
Don't make this about your husband. It's not. It's about whether you
think your son will read on your schedule.
-==-=-=-=-
So for my sons age 6 year/1st grade year, we have been laidback. We
have had a great time. I have also learned some things about me. I
can be very structured and I can get things done. Whatever I am
most interested in is what will draw me in. There are many times
when I find myself completly absorbed in working on my projects
(such as launching my online business). I don't particularly like
doing a lot of schoolish things anyway because he does not enjoy
them so we have not done a lot of structured learning in a
consistent way.
-=-=-=-=-
So---it's OK for you to get drawn in my whatever you're most interested
in, but he doesn't get the same freedom?
He doesn't enjoy schoolish things---what *does* he enjoy? Maybe we can
show you the math and reading in what he DOES love to do. Then you can
relax.
-=-=-=-=-=-
I have decided that I don't feel comfortable
waiting for my son to learn to read in his own time. I don't want
to push him but reading and math have been subjects that I seek to
work with him on eventhough we usually did so in a nontraditional
way.
-=-=-=-=-
YOU don't feel comfortable.
If you don't believe he will, you're right. Buy a curriculum.
We used to talk about the paradigm shift here a lot. Until you can make
that shift, you will not be able to unschool.
-=-=-=-=-=-
As a result, I thought it would be best to introduce a little
structure into what we do. I know my son is young, almost 7 yrs
old. I know he is a boy and boys learn best through movement. I
have gone out of my way to accomodate his kinesthetic style of
learning. We do an online reading program that is completely
interactive and the math program that I use is montessori based.
-=-=-=-=-
Why are you looking to unschool? What do you think is so great about
it? You don't believe it---that learning happens naturally. Why are you
clinging to unschooling?
If you truly believe he needs to be reading at seven, buy the
curriculum, work with him every day, and believe you're teaching him to
read.
Seriously.
Unschooling isn't for everyone. Way too many parents believe that
reading and math programs will work. If you do, DO it. You really don't
have to unchool. There are zillions of curricula out there---there are
even public and private and parochial and Montessoori and
Waldorf/Steiner---all KINDS of schools as options. Unschooling may not
be the option for you.
-=-=-=-=-=-
IF he was a little more motivated to do SOMETHING, ANYTHING to learn
to read and better understand math, I would not feel pressured to
carve out time (which is MAYBE an hour a day) to do these subjects.
-=-=-=-=-
And I guess if you were a little more motivated to learn about
unschooling it would be working for you already. You're not ready.
I could push you and push you. I could make you read articles and
websites and books and elists and message boards and books and blogs.
But if you aren't motivated, it just doesn't matter how hard I push,
does it? I could make it fun: I could make it interactive! I could
print articles on brightly colored paper. We could talk about it while
we jogged or swam or gardened. Would that make it more palatable? We
could make it a computer game: I give multiple choice or true/false
questions---and gold stars for the right answers. Would that make you
learn about unschooling faster? I could compare you to other moms who
figured it out faster---accelerated unschoolers! Or put you in the
class for---"slow" learners so that we could work harder (every day for
an hour---one-on-one!) to get you to understand. I could find your
learning style and make sure we "taught" in the way you learned best.
Learning doesn't happen like that. *YOU* must be the motivated party.
He's not motivated yet---which means he's not ready.
He's only seven. When he's ten and still struggling, what will you do?
Send him to experts?
When he's ten and reading, will you congratulate yourself for having
taught him to read?
Did you do that when he learned to walk? You *did* teach him to walk,
right? Right at 12 months?
-=-=-=-=-=-
Really, I feel pressure to make sure that he learns certain things.
-=-=-=-=-=
From whom?
-=-=-=-=-
And just to be clear, there is no doubt in me that he will
eventually be able to do all of this on his own.
-=-=-=-=-=-
There *IS* doubt. BIG doubt. Don't kid yourself here. Go back and read
what you wrote. Lots and lots of doubt.
-=-=-=-=-=-
Howvever, given this culture and my hubby's expectations, I truly feel
like we need
to something more in a consistent manner than we have.
-=-=-=-=-
Then do that.
But you know what? We ALL live in this culture. The culture has nothing
to do with whether you understand the philosophy and how to implement
it.
-=-=-=-=-=-
We have been doing math and reading everyday for MAYBE 2 weeks. I
think it is only a week and a half. I decided that we would SLOWLY
integrate doing these since we have not done much in the last month
or so. AGain, we are always learnng but maybe not actively engaged
in math and reading.
--=-=-=-=-
You're kidding yourself again.---Unless you have him locked in a room
with no written words and nothing to count with---you plug his ears,
blindfold him, and bind his fingers and toes? <g> he IS actively
learning. You just need to start actually SEEING the learning.
-=-=-=-=-=-
I am a mother who is obviously frustrated but also saddened because
I have gone out of my way to accomodate him.
-=-=-=-
Yikes! He's your CHILD, and he's LEARNING. You're saddened because
you're going out of your way to "accomodate" him? He's seven, for
crying out loud!
-=-=-=-=-
I am still willing to do so but I am beginning to feel like a villan.
-=-=-=-=-=-
I don't understand. What do you think you are doing that's villanous?
What does your son think you're doing that's villanous?
-=-=-=-=-=-
He told me this morning that he wants to go to school. I think to
myself, "you HATE
school work so why would you want to go to school?"
-=-=-=-=-
No, he hates being having his mother as his teacher. A very common
problem in school-at-home families. Standards are high, pressure is
high, and child feels like crap because he can't please his own
mom---OR even complain to his mom and dad that his teacher sucks.
-=-=-=-=-=-
Getting around to my questions: Are we normal? For those who are
more laidback in their approach to learning, what suggestions do you
have for helping me to go back to relaxing with a child who is not
schoolish?
-=-=-=-=-=-
I'm not sure I understand what you're asking. You want him to be
"schoolish?"
How many of you unschoolers here have a "schoolish" child?
-=-=-=-=-
I remember a mother telling me that when her kids were
ages 5-7 they were hardest to homeschool because they are
transitioning from being self-centered (not in a bad way but based
on getting their needs met as an infant) to expanding their world
view a bit more.
-=-=-=-=-
No, they were having a hard time going from loved, cared-for *child* to
attacked, pressured *student*!
-=-=-=-=-
She said it was not her favorite time to homeschool any of them.
-=-===-
And as she believes, so shall it be.
-=-=-=-=-=-
So for anyone, did you have a similar experience during these ages?
-=-=-
No, because we weren't trying to school-at-home. We just kept living
rich, unschooled lives. Nothing changed.
Had I been pushing reading and math, we probably would have.
Not our reality though.
-=-=-=-=-
I guess I want to know if we are normal and will just have to work
through this?
-=-=-=-=-=-
Depends. Do you want to unschool or school-at-home?
If you choose to unschool, you will need to spend the next couple of
years DEschooling yourself before you can begin to unschool your son.
If you school-at-home, I'm guessing you're just hitting the absolute,
tiniest *tip* of the iceberg.
~Kelly
Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org
________________________________________________________________________
AOL now offers free email to everyone. Find out more about what's free
from AOL at AOL.com.
[email protected]
Getting around to my questions: Are we normal? For those who are
more laidback in their approach to learning, what suggestions do you
have for helping me to go back to relaxing with a child who is not
schoolish? I remember a mother telling me that when her kids were
ages 5-7 they were hardest to homeschool because they are
transitioning from being self-centered (not in a bad way but based
on getting their needs met as an infant) to expanding their world
view a bit more. She said it was not her favorite time to
homeschool any of them. So for anyone, did you have a similar
experience during these ages? I guess I want to know if we are
normal and will just have to work through this?
Thanks to any for your wisdom and suggestions in advance!
Peacefully,
Tyra in Murfreesboro
Hey Tyra,
I also have a darling hubbie who is quite traditional in his ideas about
schoolwork, etc. Fortunately, like you, I have still got pretty much a free
rein in how I home ed and my hubbie is mostly happy with it all. We do work
out of or use reference texts every now and then.
I wondered if this suggestion might help - if you got practiced at deciphering
and recording the learning that was going on in whatever area it was happening,
you can still present your hubbie with the subjects done, they would just
be getting done in an experiential/hands-on way. You could take photos of
the activities and perhaps write in a quick description. If your son doesn't
want to write, maybe he might like to type a diary of weekly reflection.
Or you could ask if it's okay to type up something you discussed together,
etc. I find the only record keeping worth doing is for myself these days,
to reassure myself we ARE doing lots of great things. But it also comes in
handy for others to peruse and creates great familiy memories in the form
of photos and artwork. Most stuff can be done in 'real-life', even maths.
There are some good websites out there for ideas.
This is coming from having a son who has always hated doing 'schoolwork'.
I have become quite flexible in how he learns and have found that I try to
create that environment as much as possible. I have also accepted that like
most of us, he learns in peaks and troughs and that when it looks lke nothing
is happening, he is probably reflecting and synthesising.
Hang in there,
Cathy.
more laidback in their approach to learning, what suggestions do you
have for helping me to go back to relaxing with a child who is not
schoolish? I remember a mother telling me that when her kids were
ages 5-7 they were hardest to homeschool because they are
transitioning from being self-centered (not in a bad way but based
on getting their needs met as an infant) to expanding their world
view a bit more. She said it was not her favorite time to
homeschool any of them. So for anyone, did you have a similar
experience during these ages? I guess I want to know if we are
normal and will just have to work through this?
Thanks to any for your wisdom and suggestions in advance!
Peacefully,
Tyra in Murfreesboro
Hey Tyra,
I also have a darling hubbie who is quite traditional in his ideas about
schoolwork, etc. Fortunately, like you, I have still got pretty much a free
rein in how I home ed and my hubbie is mostly happy with it all. We do work
out of or use reference texts every now and then.
I wondered if this suggestion might help - if you got practiced at deciphering
and recording the learning that was going on in whatever area it was happening,
you can still present your hubbie with the subjects done, they would just
be getting done in an experiential/hands-on way. You could take photos of
the activities and perhaps write in a quick description. If your son doesn't
want to write, maybe he might like to type a diary of weekly reflection.
Or you could ask if it's okay to type up something you discussed together,
etc. I find the only record keeping worth doing is for myself these days,
to reassure myself we ARE doing lots of great things. But it also comes in
handy for others to peruse and creates great familiy memories in the form
of photos and artwork. Most stuff can be done in 'real-life', even maths.
There are some good websites out there for ideas.
This is coming from having a son who has always hated doing 'schoolwork'.
I have become quite flexible in how he learns and have found that I try to
create that environment as much as possible. I have also accepted that like
most of us, he learns in peaks and troughs and that when it looks lke nothing
is happening, he is probably reflecting and synthesising.
Hang in there,
Cathy.
Fetteroll
On Aug 8, 2007, at 12:58 PM, Tyra Olufemi wrote:
So when he's failing to do so, you're further assuming that he is at
fault.
If math and reading could be learned through teaching then schools
would work like a charm.
Reading can't happen until a child is developmentally ready. No
amount of practice will speed up the maturity of the brain areas that
need to coordinate with each other in order to decode. Practice when
a child isn't yet capable of reading will only make them feel like
there's something wrong with them. What schools take credit for is
development that
Math in school is presented ass backwards which is why so many people
leave school with math phobia. It's hoped that by presenting the
abstract that kids will figure out the concrete. Sadly even the kids
who are good at math often don't! The abstract becomes like puzzles
to them and they can apply formulas without understanding how those
look in the real world.
Everything can be learned better by puzzling sense out of real world
chaos. It's how our brains were designed to function. We're designed
to pull order out of chaos. Haven't you ever stared at some object
you couldn't quite figure out what it was until you did figure it
out? That's what the brain wants to do. It wants to put puzzles
together. It doesn't want already done puzzles handed to it. There's
no challenge, no joy in discovery. School hands kids the answer and
expects them to memorize them. It's a very poor method of learning.
And it's why schools make learning seem hard. If you're going about
it in an unnatural way, of course it's difficult!
Try reading at:
http://sandradodd.com/reading
and that should help with the reading.
Math is much harder to gain confidence in because schools do it so
wrong that it's hard to grasp how playing video games and board
games, having an allowance, having their questions answered, could
possibly give them the same as school does. Of course it doesn't!
They gain a far better conceptual understanding of how math works.
Their ability to manipulate the abstract isn't what schooled kids is,
but that's *way* easier to learn after gaining a fundamental
understanding than the other way around that schooled kids have to
do. Schooled kids *look* like they understand math because they can
do problems by rote, but it's just jumping through hoops for most of
them.
Joyce
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> IF he was a little more motivated to do SOMETHING, ANYTHING to learnYour assumption is that math and reading can be learned by teaching.
> to read and better understand math
So when he's failing to do so, you're further assuming that he is at
fault.
If math and reading could be learned through teaching then schools
would work like a charm.
Reading can't happen until a child is developmentally ready. No
amount of practice will speed up the maturity of the brain areas that
need to coordinate with each other in order to decode. Practice when
a child isn't yet capable of reading will only make them feel like
there's something wrong with them. What schools take credit for is
development that
Math in school is presented ass backwards which is why so many people
leave school with math phobia. It's hoped that by presenting the
abstract that kids will figure out the concrete. Sadly even the kids
who are good at math often don't! The abstract becomes like puzzles
to them and they can apply formulas without understanding how those
look in the real world.
Everything can be learned better by puzzling sense out of real world
chaos. It's how our brains were designed to function. We're designed
to pull order out of chaos. Haven't you ever stared at some object
you couldn't quite figure out what it was until you did figure it
out? That's what the brain wants to do. It wants to put puzzles
together. It doesn't want already done puzzles handed to it. There's
no challenge, no joy in discovery. School hands kids the answer and
expects them to memorize them. It's a very poor method of learning.
And it's why schools make learning seem hard. If you're going about
it in an unnatural way, of course it's difficult!
Try reading at:
http://sandradodd.com/reading
and that should help with the reading.
Math is much harder to gain confidence in because schools do it so
wrong that it's hard to grasp how playing video games and board
games, having an allowance, having their questions answered, could
possibly give them the same as school does. Of course it doesn't!
They gain a far better conceptual understanding of how math works.
Their ability to manipulate the abstract isn't what schooled kids is,
but that's *way* easier to learn after gaining a fundamental
understanding than the other way around that schooled kids have to
do. Schooled kids *look* like they understand math because they can
do problems by rote, but it's just jumping through hoops for most of
them.
Joyce
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
>Wow, Kelly.
>You weren't unschooling. You were just letting him be while you did
>other things. Unschooling is about trusting that he will learn when he
>is ready. That INCLUDES reading and math.
I was on the edge of my seat reading your reply to this one. It really spoke
to my experience where I am now - moving towards unschooling, but having
to be brutally honest with myself about WHY I need to be controlling. There
are many parenting areas I feel secure and instinctively know I am doing
the right thing for my kids, but others, like in using anger and coercion,
where I am needing to grow so much. I love metaphor and storytelling as ways
to communicate knowledge, but there was something so great about your matter
of fact answers to each of Tyra's thoughts that really helped me.
Cheers!
Cathy.
[email protected]
Your assumption is that math and reading can be learned by teaching.
So when he's failing to do so, you're further assuming that he is at
fault.
WOOHOO JOYCE!!!!
Man, I am loving this group. I am hearing stuff straight forward and honest
and even though I have been reassuring folk around me for years about unschooling,
it isn't until recently that I realised that I was sitting on the fence,
somewhere in the quiet recesses of my mind (hang on, those recesses aren't
really quiet at the moment, lol). I know all of this stuff and most of me
was there INTELLECTUALLY, but I am only just starting to OWN the idea of
unschooling. Brilliant.
Thanks guys!
Cathy.
So when he's failing to do so, you're further assuming that he is at
fault.
WOOHOO JOYCE!!!!
Man, I am loving this group. I am hearing stuff straight forward and honest
and even though I have been reassuring folk around me for years about unschooling,
it isn't until recently that I realised that I was sitting on the fence,
somewhere in the quiet recesses of my mind (hang on, those recesses aren't
really quiet at the moment, lol). I know all of this stuff and most of me
was there INTELLECTUALLY, but I am only just starting to OWN the idea of
unschooling. Brilliant.
Thanks guys!
Cathy.
Tyra-Goddess-Body-Mind-Spirit.com
THanks Joyce. I appreciate that puzzling piece. That makes sense to me. I have witnessed my son's inclination toward understanding math.
YOur points are well taken. I will read the info at the link you provided.
Peace
Tyra
From: Fetteroll <fetteroll@...>
Date: 2007/08/08 Wed PM 05:41:52 CDT
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] Seeking your advice and your wisdom
YOur points are well taken. I will read the info at the link you provided.
Peace
Tyra
From: Fetteroll <fetteroll@...>
Date: 2007/08/08 Wed PM 05:41:52 CDT
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] Seeking your advice and your wisdom
On Aug 8, 2007, at 12:58 PM, Tyra Olufemi wrote:
> IF he was a little more motivated to do SOMETHING, ANYTHING to learn
> to read and better understand math
Your assumption is that math and reading can be learned by teaching.
So when he's failing to do so, you're further assuming that he is at
fault.
If math and reading could be learned through teaching then schools
would work like a charm.
Reading can't happen until a child is developmentally ready. No
amount of practice will speed up the maturity of the brain areas that
need to coordinate with each other in order to decode. Practice when
a child isn't yet capable of reading will only make them feel like
there's something wrong with them. What schools take credit for is
development that
Math in school is presented ass backwards which is why so many people
leave school with math phobia. It's hoped that by presenting the
abstract that kids will figure out the concrete. Sadly even the kids
who are good at math often don't! The abstract becomes like puzzles
to them and they can apply formulas without understanding how those
look in the real world.
Everything can be learned better by puzzling sense out of real world
chaos. It's how our brains were designed to function. We're designed
to pull order out of chaos. Haven't you ever stared at some object
you couldn't quite figure out what it was until you did figure it
out? That's what the brain wants to do. It wants to put puzzles
together. It doesn't want already done puzzles handed to it. There's
no challenge, no joy in discovery. School hands kids the answer and
expects them to memorize them. It's a very poor method of learning.
And it's why schools make learning seem hard. If you're going about
it in an unnatural way, of course it's difficult!
Try reading at:
http://sandradodd.com/reading
and that should help with the reading.
Math is much harder to gain confidence in because schools do it so
wrong that it's hard to grasp how playing video games and board
games, having an allowance, having their questions answered, could
possibly give them the same as school does. Of course it doesn't!
They gain a far better conceptual understanding of how math works.
Their ability to manipulate the abstract isn't what schooled kids is,
but that's *way* easier to learn after gaining a fundamental
understanding than the other way around that schooled kids have to
do. Schooled kids *look* like they understand math because they can
do problems by rote, but it's just jumping through hoops for most of
them.
Joyce
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Tyra-Goddess-Body-Mind-Spirit.com
Your suggestions are really good, Cathy. I have done that in the past in terms of deciphering what he had done all day in order to translate it to my hubby. My hubby really is not micromanaging or anything. Again, Kelly's response helped me to view this thing from a more authentic perspective. I don't want to fail. I don't want to be seen as a failure so that is why I abandoned my previous unschooling approach and started to do the school thing.
Right now I am evaluating my lifestyle. I am seeing where I am maybe out of balance because of busy-ness. This busy-ness, I believe, is preventing me from stopping and smelling the flowers with my kids.
I truly appreciate your wisdom and suggestions.
Much Peace and Love
Tyra
From: chis31@...
Date: 2007/08/08 Wed PM 05:34:42 CDT
To: [email protected]
Subject: RE: [unschoolingbasics] Seeking your advice and your wisdom
Getting around to my questions: Are we normal? For those who are
more laidback in their approach to learning, what suggestions do you
have for helping me to go back to relaxing with a child who is not
schoolish? I remember a mother telling me that when her kids were
ages 5-7 they were hardest to homeschool because they are
transitioning from being self-centered (not in a bad way but based
on getting their needs met as an infant) to expanding their world
view a bit more. She said it was not her favorite time to
homeschool any of them. So for anyone, did you have a similar
experience during these ages? I guess I want to know if we are
normal and will just have to work through this?
Thanks to any for your wisdom and suggestions in advance!
Peacefully,
Tyra in Murfreesboro
Hey Tyra,
I also have a darling hubbie who is quite traditional in his ideas about
schoolwork, etc. Fortunately, like you, I have still got pretty much a free
rein in how I home ed and my hubbie is mostly happy with it all. We do work
out of or use reference texts every now and then.
I wondered if this suggestion might help - if you got practiced at deciphering
and recording the learning that was going on in whatever area it was happening,
you can still present your hubbie with the subjects done, they would just
be getting done in an experiential/hands-on way. You could take photos of
the activities and perhaps write in a quick description. If your son doesn't
want to write, maybe he might like to type a diary of weekly reflection.
Or you could ask if it's okay to type up something you discussed together,
etc. I find the only record keeping worth doing is for myself these days,
to reassure myself we ARE doing lots of great things. But it also comes in
handy for others to peruse and creates great familiy memories in the form
of photos and artwork. Most stuff can be done in 'real-life', even maths.
There are some good websites out there for ideas.
This is coming from having a son who has always hated doing 'schoolwork'.
I have become quite flexible in how he learns and have found that I try to
create that environment as much as possible. I have also accepted that like
most of us, he learns in peaks and troughs and that when it looks lke nothing
is happening, he is probably reflecting and synthesising.
Hang in there,
Cathy.
Right now I am evaluating my lifestyle. I am seeing where I am maybe out of balance because of busy-ness. This busy-ness, I believe, is preventing me from stopping and smelling the flowers with my kids.
I truly appreciate your wisdom and suggestions.
Much Peace and Love
Tyra
From: chis31@...
Date: 2007/08/08 Wed PM 05:34:42 CDT
To: [email protected]
Subject: RE: [unschoolingbasics] Seeking your advice and your wisdom
Getting around to my questions: Are we normal? For those who are
more laidback in their approach to learning, what suggestions do you
have for helping me to go back to relaxing with a child who is not
schoolish? I remember a mother telling me that when her kids were
ages 5-7 they were hardest to homeschool because they are
transitioning from being self-centered (not in a bad way but based
on getting their needs met as an infant) to expanding their world
view a bit more. She said it was not her favorite time to
homeschool any of them. So for anyone, did you have a similar
experience during these ages? I guess I want to know if we are
normal and will just have to work through this?
Thanks to any for your wisdom and suggestions in advance!
Peacefully,
Tyra in Murfreesboro
Hey Tyra,
I also have a darling hubbie who is quite traditional in his ideas about
schoolwork, etc. Fortunately, like you, I have still got pretty much a free
rein in how I home ed and my hubbie is mostly happy with it all. We do work
out of or use reference texts every now and then.
I wondered if this suggestion might help - if you got practiced at deciphering
and recording the learning that was going on in whatever area it was happening,
you can still present your hubbie with the subjects done, they would just
be getting done in an experiential/hands-on way. You could take photos of
the activities and perhaps write in a quick description. If your son doesn't
want to write, maybe he might like to type a diary of weekly reflection.
Or you could ask if it's okay to type up something you discussed together,
etc. I find the only record keeping worth doing is for myself these days,
to reassure myself we ARE doing lots of great things. But it also comes in
handy for others to peruse and creates great familiy memories in the form
of photos and artwork. Most stuff can be done in 'real-life', even maths.
There are some good websites out there for ideas.
This is coming from having a son who has always hated doing 'schoolwork'.
I have become quite flexible in how he learns and have found that I try to
create that environment as much as possible. I have also accepted that like
most of us, he learns in peaks and troughs and that when it looks lke nothing
is happening, he is probably reflecting and synthesising.
Hang in there,
Cathy.
Ren Allen
~~I am a mother who is obviously frustrated but also saddened because
I have gone out of my way to accomodate him. I am still willing to
do so but I am beginning to feel like a villan. He told me this
morning that he wants to go to school. I think to myself, "you HATE
school work so why would you want to go to school?"~~
So his Mom isn't the one nagging him at least? So there are other kids
that suffer with him? I think home should be a haven from all that
crap. If you're bringing it home, then no wonder he wants away from
it. At least if you go to school, you can come home to get away from
school, right?
You're panicking based on a false system that has nothing to do with
real learning. Why should a 6 or 7 year old NEED reading or math
skills? Truly. Those are picked up by doing what you love anyway. You
realize he's very young but you still have school baggage attached to
some mythological timeline.
My 14 y.o. learned to read at age 12. You wouldn't know him apart from
a child that learned at 6. Your child needs to be celebrated for
exactly what he is interested in TODAY. He needs to have his very real
interests nourished.
Let go of the idea that learning happens on some time table or that
certain skills are more important than others. They aren't. Trust that
living a full, rich life is more than enough. Trust your child more
than the school system. That's really all it takes.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
I have gone out of my way to accomodate him. I am still willing to
do so but I am beginning to feel like a villan. He told me this
morning that he wants to go to school. I think to myself, "you HATE
school work so why would you want to go to school?"~~
So his Mom isn't the one nagging him at least? So there are other kids
that suffer with him? I think home should be a haven from all that
crap. If you're bringing it home, then no wonder he wants away from
it. At least if you go to school, you can come home to get away from
school, right?
You're panicking based on a false system that has nothing to do with
real learning. Why should a 6 or 7 year old NEED reading or math
skills? Truly. Those are picked up by doing what you love anyway. You
realize he's very young but you still have school baggage attached to
some mythological timeline.
My 14 y.o. learned to read at age 12. You wouldn't know him apart from
a child that learned at 6. Your child needs to be celebrated for
exactly what he is interested in TODAY. He needs to have his very real
interests nourished.
Let go of the idea that learning happens on some time table or that
certain skills are more important than others. They aren't. Trust that
living a full, rich life is more than enough. Trust your child more
than the school system. That's really all it takes.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
Ren Allen
~~Right now I am evaluating my lifestyle. I am seeing where I am maybe
out of balance because of busy-ness. This busy-ness, I believe, is
preventing me from stopping and smelling the flowers with my kids.~~
I got that feeling from some other comments you made. It could be
partly that you're a "results" oriented person. But there is also that
societal pressure to have a product, a result a SOMETHING to show for
our effort.
Unschooling is very Zen-like. We aren't focused on any end result.
We're not looking for a product. It's about joy in the moment. Not
very Western is it?:)
Being IN the moment with your child, seeing their joy, doing an
activity just because it's ENJOYABLE and knowing that it has
value....that's the trust of unschooling. If you really think about
the way we learn best (the "we" being adults), that same freedom
applies to kids. We have the freedom to stop or start something at
will. We have the freedom to learn whatever we choose, whenever we
choose with whatever tools we want to use. Kids should have that same
freedom, without anyone adding stress to the process by looking for
any result.
I would get pretty frustrated with my dh if he was judging or grading
my art or my knitting or my writing. I do those things for the joy of
it. When I want input, I ask for it. OTherwish I'm free to do as much
or little as I choose.
I really believe John Holt hit the nail on the head when he said "In
order to trust the children, we must first learn to trust ourselves."
That's what it's all about, isn't it?
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
out of balance because of busy-ness. This busy-ness, I believe, is
preventing me from stopping and smelling the flowers with my kids.~~
I got that feeling from some other comments you made. It could be
partly that you're a "results" oriented person. But there is also that
societal pressure to have a product, a result a SOMETHING to show for
our effort.
Unschooling is very Zen-like. We aren't focused on any end result.
We're not looking for a product. It's about joy in the moment. Not
very Western is it?:)
Being IN the moment with your child, seeing their joy, doing an
activity just because it's ENJOYABLE and knowing that it has
value....that's the trust of unschooling. If you really think about
the way we learn best (the "we" being adults), that same freedom
applies to kids. We have the freedom to stop or start something at
will. We have the freedom to learn whatever we choose, whenever we
choose with whatever tools we want to use. Kids should have that same
freedom, without anyone adding stress to the process by looking for
any result.
I would get pretty frustrated with my dh if he was judging or grading
my art or my knitting or my writing. I do those things for the joy of
it. When I want input, I ask for it. OTherwish I'm free to do as much
or little as I choose.
I really believe John Holt hit the nail on the head when he said "In
order to trust the children, we must first learn to trust ourselves."
That's what it's all about, isn't it?
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
Tyra-Goddess-Body-Mind-Spirit.com
Thanks Ren. And I have thought that I would like the teacher to be the villan and not me so your point is well taken.
Peace
Tyra
From: "Ren Allen" <starsuncloud@...>
Date: 2007/08/08 Wed PM 08:14:00 CDT
To: [email protected]
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Re: Seeking your advice and your wisdom
~~I am a mother who is obviously frustrated but also saddened because
I have gone out of my way to accomodate him. I am still willing to
do so but I am beginning to feel like a villan. He told me this
morning that he wants to go to school. I think to myself, "you HATE
school work so why would you want to go to school?"~~
So his Mom isn't the one nagging him at least? So there are other kids
that suffer with him? I think home should be a haven from all that
crap. If you're bringing it home, then no wonder he wants away from
it. At least if you go to school, you can come home to get away from
school, right?
You're panicking based on a false system that has nothing to do with
real learning. Why should a 6 or 7 year old NEED reading or math
skills? Truly. Those are picked up by doing what you love anyway. You
realize he's very young but you still have school baggage attached to
some mythological timeline.
My 14 y.o. learned to read at age 12. You wouldn't know him apart from
a child that learned at 6. Your child needs to be celebrated for
exactly what he is interested in TODAY. He needs to have his very real
interests nourished.
Let go of the idea that learning happens on some time table or that
certain skills are more important than others. They aren't. Trust that
living a full, rich life is more than enough. Trust your child more
than the school system. That's really all it takes.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
Peace
Tyra
From: "Ren Allen" <starsuncloud@...>
Date: 2007/08/08 Wed PM 08:14:00 CDT
To: [email protected]
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Re: Seeking your advice and your wisdom
~~I am a mother who is obviously frustrated but also saddened because
I have gone out of my way to accomodate him. I am still willing to
do so but I am beginning to feel like a villan. He told me this
morning that he wants to go to school. I think to myself, "you HATE
school work so why would you want to go to school?"~~
So his Mom isn't the one nagging him at least? So there are other kids
that suffer with him? I think home should be a haven from all that
crap. If you're bringing it home, then no wonder he wants away from
it. At least if you go to school, you can come home to get away from
school, right?
You're panicking based on a false system that has nothing to do with
real learning. Why should a 6 or 7 year old NEED reading or math
skills? Truly. Those are picked up by doing what you love anyway. You
realize he's very young but you still have school baggage attached to
some mythological timeline.
My 14 y.o. learned to read at age 12. You wouldn't know him apart from
a child that learned at 6. Your child needs to be celebrated for
exactly what he is interested in TODAY. He needs to have his very real
interests nourished.
Let go of the idea that learning happens on some time table or that
certain skills are more important than others. They aren't. Trust that
living a full, rich life is more than enough. Trust your child more
than the school system. That's really all it takes.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
rn9302000
"Why should a 6 or 7 year old NEED reading or math
skills? Truly. Those are picked up by doing what you love anyway. You
realize he's very young but you still have school baggage attached to
some mythological timeline.
My 14 y.o. learned to read at age 12. You wouldn't know him apart from
a child that learned at 6. Your child needs to be celebrated for
exactly what he is interested in TODAY. He needs to have his very real
interests nourished."
Ren,
Right now I am working on my progress report for last school year for
my now 7 yo dd.......I also am preparing my letter of intent and my
educational plan......all of these things have been requested by my
district, and falls withing massachusetts law for them to require
it......sooo my question to you is.......do you live in a state like I
do where you have to report to the school on your child's progress?
and how do you do this as an unschooler. I wonder how I will continue
to show progress reports which may not fit the school's timeline for
what should happen at each "grade".
Diane
skills? Truly. Those are picked up by doing what you love anyway. You
realize he's very young but you still have school baggage attached to
some mythological timeline.
My 14 y.o. learned to read at age 12. You wouldn't know him apart from
a child that learned at 6. Your child needs to be celebrated for
exactly what he is interested in TODAY. He needs to have his very real
interests nourished."
Ren,
Right now I am working on my progress report for last school year for
my now 7 yo dd.......I also am preparing my letter of intent and my
educational plan......all of these things have been requested by my
district, and falls withing massachusetts law for them to require
it......sooo my question to you is.......do you live in a state like I
do where you have to report to the school on your child's progress?
and how do you do this as an unschooler. I wonder how I will continue
to show progress reports which may not fit the school's timeline for
what should happen at each "grade".
Diane
Tyra-Goddess-Body-Mind-Spirit.com
Yep. It boils down to that. I really don't know how I got away from my trust in learning through enjoyment. Just a year or so ago I wrote an article about how unschooling best fits in with my spiritual approach to life which is zen.
But this has been a good experience. I have regressed a wee bit but I am still growing despite. My eyes have been re-opened and I seek to find my center again as I ride this unschooling spiral.
Trust...yet another point that totally resonates with me.
much love
Tyra
From: "Ren Allen" <starsuncloud@...>
I really believe John Holt hit the nail on the head when he said "In
order to trust the children, we must first learn to trust ourselves."
That's what it's all about, isn't it?
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
But this has been a good experience. I have regressed a wee bit but I am still growing despite. My eyes have been re-opened and I seek to find my center again as I ride this unschooling spiral.
Trust...yet another point that totally resonates with me.
much love
Tyra
From: "Ren Allen" <starsuncloud@...>
I really believe John Holt hit the nail on the head when he said "In
order to trust the children, we must first learn to trust ourselves."
That's what it's all about, isn't it?
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
Cameron Parham
If you choose to unschool, you will need to spend the next couple of
years DEschooling yourself before you can begin to unschool your son.
OK, this seems likely to be true based on our experiences since we started trying to radically unschool in March 2007. I have many more questions, and hope that I get to fire off a longer field report but this exchange touches on one area of concern for me. While I am getting deschooled, and so inherently cannot really unschool actively, how do I best help the kids? In this exchange someting like this was said, "You were not unschooling but were doing your own thing and letting him do his." I can't quote it as I accidently erased it. Darn. But we are in the midst of deschooling and er...yep, I am still tring to do my best at even that! I hope that this quetion is decipherable. Thanks..Cameron
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
years DEschooling yourself before you can begin to unschool your son.
OK, this seems likely to be true based on our experiences since we started trying to radically unschool in March 2007. I have many more questions, and hope that I get to fire off a longer field report but this exchange touches on one area of concern for me. While I am getting deschooled, and so inherently cannot really unschool actively, how do I best help the kids? In this exchange someting like this was said, "You were not unschooling but were doing your own thing and letting him do his." I can't quote it as I accidently erased it. Darn. But we are in the midst of deschooling and er...yep, I am still tring to do my best at even that! I hope that this quetion is decipherable. Thanks..Cameron
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Fetteroll
On Aug 8, 2007, at 10:18 PM, rn9302000 wrote:
states is that you need to show progress. I deliberately chose not to
write anything to impress the superintendent incase there wasn't any
progress the next year ;-) There always was, but I didn't want to
give the impression she was reading better than she was. (It wasn't
clear Kat was reading fluently until she was 10.) I just said,
"continues to improve" and mentioned some of the things she was still
"working on".
There are two homeschooling lists in MA where you can get more
thorough answers. I'm forgetting their names but they're easy enough
to search for.
There's also:
NewEnglandUnschooling
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/NewEnglandUnschooling/
Joyce
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> I wonder how I will continueIt isn't necessary to keep up with grade level. All the case law
> to show progress reports which may not fit the school's timeline for
> what should happen at each "grade".
states is that you need to show progress. I deliberately chose not to
write anything to impress the superintendent incase there wasn't any
progress the next year ;-) There always was, but I didn't want to
give the impression she was reading better than she was. (It wasn't
clear Kat was reading fluently until she was 10.) I just said,
"continues to improve" and mentioned some of the things she was still
"working on".
There are two homeschooling lists in MA where you can get more
thorough answers. I'm forgetting their names but they're easy enough
to search for.
There's also:
NewEnglandUnschooling
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/NewEnglandUnschooling/
Joyce
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Ren Allen
~~I wonder how I will continue
to show progress reports which may not fit the school's timeline for
what should happen at each "grade".~~
YOu don't need to in MA. There are several here that can answer more
clearly.
In FL, you only had to prove that your child had "progressed". Well,
they're learning more all the time, so there is not way they wouldn't
progress! There is NO need to think that you need to follow any school
timeline.
There are usually other options for meeting the law that don't include
reporting to the school district at all. We can meet the law in TN by
registering with an umbrella school.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
to show progress reports which may not fit the school's timeline for
what should happen at each "grade".~~
YOu don't need to in MA. There are several here that can answer more
clearly.
In FL, you only had to prove that your child had "progressed". Well,
they're learning more all the time, so there is not way they wouldn't
progress! There is NO need to think that you need to follow any school
timeline.
There are usually other options for meeting the law that don't include
reporting to the school district at all. We can meet the law in TN by
registering with an umbrella school.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
rn9302000
Thank you Joyce,
I am on the MHLA yahoo list, I was just wondering from an unschoolers
perspective how reporting is done. how experienced unschoolers deal
with reporting.
I think I just said something similar to you........some wording such
as "progress has been made".......yadayada!LOL
Diane
I am on the MHLA yahoo list, I was just wondering from an unschoolers
perspective how reporting is done. how experienced unschoolers deal
with reporting.
I think I just said something similar to you........some wording such
as "progress has been made".......yadayada!LOL
Diane
Ren Allen
~~While I am getting deschooled, and so inherently
cannot really unschool actively, how do I best help the kids? ~~
I really believe the two are intertwined. If every parent waited until
all their trust was renewed and they had no fears, then very few would
ever unschool! I think a lot of us choose to walk forward because our
children are worth it, because our hearts are urging us to trust and
because it really makes SENSE. But these issues swell up (like the
spiral that Tyra describes) and we learn through them.
We learn that it's really about our baggage, not our children's lack
(because there is no lack in them...it's only our watered down
perception that gets in the way) or inability to learn.
We learn that trust WORKS. We learn that we can let go and still be
connected. As we extend trust to our children and choose joy over
fear, we heal. Through that healing we deschool and unschooling can
blossom more fully. It's a process. Nobody needs to deschool before
they unschool...but unschooling will flow freely and beautifully once
you have gotten most of the school out of your head!:)
I think less focus on what children are learning, and more focus on
what brings a family joy, will propel the family into unschooling
faster than anything.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
cannot really unschool actively, how do I best help the kids? ~~
I really believe the two are intertwined. If every parent waited until
all their trust was renewed and they had no fears, then very few would
ever unschool! I think a lot of us choose to walk forward because our
children are worth it, because our hearts are urging us to trust and
because it really makes SENSE. But these issues swell up (like the
spiral that Tyra describes) and we learn through them.
We learn that it's really about our baggage, not our children's lack
(because there is no lack in them...it's only our watered down
perception that gets in the way) or inability to learn.
We learn that trust WORKS. We learn that we can let go and still be
connected. As we extend trust to our children and choose joy over
fear, we heal. Through that healing we deschool and unschooling can
blossom more fully. It's a process. Nobody needs to deschool before
they unschool...but unschooling will flow freely and beautifully once
you have gotten most of the school out of your head!:)
I think less focus on what children are learning, and more focus on
what brings a family joy, will propel the family into unschooling
faster than anything.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
Melissa
Ren, lovely! Our word for the day on Braingle was PERSPICUITY....and
this is a great example. May I quote you on our local list and/or my
blog?
Our deschooling period was less about the kids and more about me. Dh
calls it the "period of benign neglect" because what it consisted of
was ME biting my tongue and relearning all the parenting and
expectations I had been brainwashed into believing. I had to step
back, be an observer, safety monitor, etc. As my trust grew, then we
were able to get more active together...but before that it would have
built a big wall of distrust between us because I could not let go of
all the other stuff. Oddly enough academics has never been an issue
for me, but all the other stuff started that way.
Melissa
Mom to Josh (12), Breanna (10), Emily (8), Rachel (7), Sam (6), Dan
(4), and Avari Rose (19 months)
share our lives at
http://360.yahoo.com/multimomma
this is a great example. May I quote you on our local list and/or my
blog?
Our deschooling period was less about the kids and more about me. Dh
calls it the "period of benign neglect" because what it consisted of
was ME biting my tongue and relearning all the parenting and
expectations I had been brainwashed into believing. I had to step
back, be an observer, safety monitor, etc. As my trust grew, then we
were able to get more active together...but before that it would have
built a big wall of distrust between us because I could not let go of
all the other stuff. Oddly enough academics has never been an issue
for me, but all the other stuff started that way.
Melissa
Mom to Josh (12), Breanna (10), Emily (8), Rachel (7), Sam (6), Dan
(4), and Avari Rose (19 months)
share our lives at
http://360.yahoo.com/multimomma
On Aug 8, 2007, at 10:47 PM, Ren Allen wrote:
> ~~While I am getting deschooled, and so inherently
> cannot really unschool actively, how do I best help the kids? ~~
>
> I really believe the two are intertwined. If every parent waited until
> all their trust was renewed and they had no fears, then very few would
> ever unschool! I think a lot of us choose to walk forward because our
> children are worth it, because our hearts are urging us to trust and
> because it really makes SENSE. But these issues swell up (like the
> spiral that Tyra describes) and we learn through them.
>
> We learn that it's really about our baggage, not our children's lack
> (because there is no lack in them...it's only our watered down
> perception that gets in the way) or inability to learn.
>
> We learn that trust WORKS. We learn that we can let go and still be
> connected. As we extend trust to our children and choose joy over
> fear, we heal. Through that healing we deschool and unschooling can
> blossom more fully. It's a process. Nobody needs to deschool before
> they unschool...but unschooling will flow freely and beautifully once
> you have gotten most of the school out of your head!:)
>
> I think less focus on what children are learning, and more focus on
> what brings a family joy, will propel the family into unschooling
> faster than anything.
>
> Ren
> learninginfreedom.com
>
>
>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
rn9302000
"I wonder how I will continue
to show progress reports which may not fit the school's timeline for
what should happen at each "grade".~~"
"YOu don't need to in MA. There are several here that can answer more
clearly."
The reason I asked is because in the Charles case law here....it
states the school may require periodic evaluation to ensure
educational progress and minimum standards. I guess I assumed the
minimum standards meant progressing thru minimum standards for each
grade level.
So thats why I was wondering how an unschooler reports.
Last school year was the first I had to submit anything and this is
the first progress report I have had to do. I am sure I will get
better at the educationalese lingo to make the school "happy".
Diane
to show progress reports which may not fit the school's timeline for
what should happen at each "grade".~~"
"YOu don't need to in MA. There are several here that can answer more
clearly."
The reason I asked is because in the Charles case law here....it
states the school may require periodic evaluation to ensure
educational progress and minimum standards. I guess I assumed the
minimum standards meant progressing thru minimum standards for each
grade level.
So thats why I was wondering how an unschooler reports.
Last school year was the first I had to submit anything and this is
the first progress report I have had to do. I am sure I will get
better at the educationalese lingo to make the school "happy".
Diane
Mara
Hi everyone,
my son is turning 6 in August and so I wrote a short
letter of intent listing general subjects we will most
likely cover by just living and also saying that we
will most likely meet or surpass the hours required by
law because we believe that learning happens all day -
Now this is part of his response:
Quote: Although you have listed the subjects you will
be teaching, I ask that you please provide us with
more information, such as the materials you are
planning to use in the various subject areas, the
number of hours of intstruction you plan to provide,
and how you will monitor L.' progress.
After reviewing this information, I'll be happpy to
grant approval.
In reality of course there wont be 'any' hours of
instruction. He is learning all the time and I deaply
believe that teaching and learning have nothing to do
with each other, unless someone seeks out a 'teacher'.
The materials of course will vary and I can not know
all the things he might like to know about the coming
year. I could take a wild guess, or I could copy some
overview of a random curriculum and say that we might
be doing some of those things -
How do I monitor his progress? I do not like to look
at my child in that way - of course he makes
'progress' - maybe I could just say that I plan to
keep a diary of what we do during the day, and that
would be enough to realize his progress. I so hate
that word.
How do I deal with him and this letter as this is only
my first year of having to report? Any ideas? And what
exactly is an umbrella school?
Lots of love to you all -
Mara
Take the Internet to Go: Yahoo!Go puts the Internet in your pocket: mail, news, photos & more.
http://mobile.yahoo.com/go?refer=1GNXIC
my son is turning 6 in August and so I wrote a short
letter of intent listing general subjects we will most
likely cover by just living and also saying that we
will most likely meet or surpass the hours required by
law because we believe that learning happens all day -
Now this is part of his response:
Quote: Although you have listed the subjects you will
be teaching, I ask that you please provide us with
more information, such as the materials you are
planning to use in the various subject areas, the
number of hours of intstruction you plan to provide,
and how you will monitor L.' progress.
After reviewing this information, I'll be happpy to
grant approval.
In reality of course there wont be 'any' hours of
instruction. He is learning all the time and I deaply
believe that teaching and learning have nothing to do
with each other, unless someone seeks out a 'teacher'.
The materials of course will vary and I can not know
all the things he might like to know about the coming
year. I could take a wild guess, or I could copy some
overview of a random curriculum and say that we might
be doing some of those things -
How do I monitor his progress? I do not like to look
at my child in that way - of course he makes
'progress' - maybe I could just say that I plan to
keep a diary of what we do during the day, and that
would be enough to realize his progress. I so hate
that word.
How do I deal with him and this letter as this is only
my first year of having to report? Any ideas? And what
exactly is an umbrella school?
Lots of love to you all -
Mara
>____________________________________________________________________________________
Take the Internet to Go: Yahoo!Go puts the Internet in your pocket: mail, news, photos & more.
http://mobile.yahoo.com/go?refer=1GNXIC
[email protected]
Schools destroy the spirits and damage the intellects of countless young boys
by insisting that they sit still and think at the same time, which very many
are simply not capable of doing. Parents at home can destroy spirits too. An
hour a day is WAY too much to ask of many many MANY young children.
Being not even seven and not yet reading is NOTNOTNOT being a late reader.
Not even close. NOT! This is really important! You can't force reading on a kid
who isn't ready, but you CAN convince them that they're broken and/or stupid
if you try.
Unschooling saved the spirits and intellects of my two youngest children. Had
they gone to school they would not have been succesful in school terms in
those all important early years. my son because at 5 and 6 and 7 and 8 he could
think well OR he could sit still, but not both at the same time. My daughter
because she is a visual thinker who learned to read late and slow. One would
have been labeled trouble and the other special grouped. Both would likely have
ended up feeling stupid and deficient. Instead they are confident and happy in
learning and life at 15. Lucky lucky them to be born into an already
unschooling home.
At the very least, read Raymond Moore's Better Late than Early, for support
in not pushing any academics on young children.
Deborah in IL
**************************************
Get a sneak peek of the
all-new AOL at http://discover.aol.com/memed/aolcom30tour
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
by insisting that they sit still and think at the same time, which very many
are simply not capable of doing. Parents at home can destroy spirits too. An
hour a day is WAY too much to ask of many many MANY young children.
Being not even seven and not yet reading is NOTNOTNOT being a late reader.
Not even close. NOT! This is really important! You can't force reading on a kid
who isn't ready, but you CAN convince them that they're broken and/or stupid
if you try.
Unschooling saved the spirits and intellects of my two youngest children. Had
they gone to school they would not have been succesful in school terms in
those all important early years. my son because at 5 and 6 and 7 and 8 he could
think well OR he could sit still, but not both at the same time. My daughter
because she is a visual thinker who learned to read late and slow. One would
have been labeled trouble and the other special grouped. Both would likely have
ended up feeling stupid and deficient. Instead they are confident and happy in
learning and life at 15. Lucky lucky them to be born into an already
unschooling home.
At the very least, read Raymond Moore's Better Late than Early, for support
in not pushing any academics on young children.
Deborah in IL
**************************************
Get a sneak peek of the
all-new AOL at http://discover.aol.com/memed/aolcom30tour
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
rn9302000
Hi Mara,
I can tell you I used a basic generic course of study outline I took
from the Worldbook website.
I also listed books we "might" use......I included a line that said we
have the option to change "curriculum" and subject matter and
resources used.
I also said in my letter of intent something like, learning will be
planned based on interests.
Diane
I can tell you I used a basic generic course of study outline I took
from the Worldbook website.
I also listed books we "might" use......I included a line that said we
have the option to change "curriculum" and subject matter and
resources used.
I also said in my letter of intent something like, learning will be
planned based on interests.
Diane
[email protected]
-----Original Message-----
From: Cameron Parham <acsp2205@...>
OK, this seems likely to be true based on our experiences since we
started
trying to radically unschool in March 2007. I have many more
questions, and
hope that I get to fire off a longer field report but this exchange
touches on
one area of concern for me. While I am getting deschooled, and so
inherently
cannot really unschool actively, how do I best help the kids? In this
exchange
someting like this was said, "You were not unschooling but were doing
your own
thing and letting him do his." I can't quote it as I accidently erased
it.
-=-=-=-
I *think* I wrote: "You weren't unschooling; you were letting him be
while you were busy with other things."
-=-=-=-
Darn. But we are in the midst of deschooling and er...yep, I am still
tring to
do my best at even that! I hope that this quetion is decipherable.
-=-=-=-=-=-
I think I understand what you're asking! <G>
To me, for adults, the DEschooling process is about four things: 1)
seeing that learning happens naturally to everyone around you, 2)
immersing your own self in something important (and including the
children if they want), 3) documenting your children's learning
*without* disturbing it, and 4) NOT nagging or teaching or worrying.
The original poster was busy moving and starting her own business---so
she was actively doing #2. But she wasn't doing #s 1, 3, or 4.
#1 needs to be done often---and not just with your children. Ask
around---lots of people you know: how did you learn what you know?
Especially folks with interesting jobs. Where did they gain their
knowledge of what they're doing. In school? The only professions that
latch on to that "book larnin'" with a passion are doctors and lawyers
(you're one, right Cameron?---that's got to be an impediment for you!
<g> 'Cause you and your colleagues really do believe in that "skule
larnin'." But it can be done! <G>) That's take a little more effort on
your part
Ren has a test (ironic, huh?) that she gives at conferences. It's
*very* telling when you see how many hands go up and down. Ren, you
want to bring that here again?
#2 is about finding a passion. Get involved in something that will take
your mind of nagging your children. SHOW your children what real
learning looks like. Doing something difficult is even better: that way
they get to see you fail a bit too! Duncan and I picked up fencing two
years ago. It was a lot of fun, but a LOT of work. Duncan enjoyed
seeing me get beaten by a child half my size! <G> (But she was GOOD!)
I'd fence at home---just learning the steps and positions so he saw me
working towards my goal (Dunc wasn't as interested in doing the
homework).
I also keep bees: we've had three swarms, but we've also harvested lots
of honey. I garden, but it's a good thing we don't rely on my crops to
feed us---I'm not all that good at producing bumper crops! <g> We cry
(and sometimes laugh) at my failures and revel in my successes. It's
good for children to see that the learning isn't spontaneous but is a
process. Too often children only see us be perfect: we don't burn
supper any more because we've had a lot of practice making the meals we
serve. Make more "strange" suppers---experiment in the kitchen---and
maybe call Domino's when you fail.
Children desperately need to see their parents struggle to learn
something new. Otherwise they believe that we *came* this way! They
don't realize that were kids just they they are! That we've *learned*
everything we know!
#3: Write it down! Learn educationese. And learn how to translate what
your child is doing into educationese. Today, with their earned $$$
(helping my parents move yesterday), Duncan and his friend Bo bought
new Bionicles. They put them together, posed them, took photos of them,
and thought up elaborate stories and adventures for them. They swam for
a few hours and played with the hose. They made banana-strawberries
smoothies. They played on the computer a bit---DeviantArt and WOW. We
all went out to eat at San Jose's---and Duncan spoke to our waiter in
Spanish (just por favor and gracias, but he spoke Spanish!). We all
watched South Park and then baked cookies. They're upstairs now
talking, playing with their Bionicles, and watching a movie.
Based on that day, would anyone like to attempt a daily log of
educationese?
My (required by law) daily log (just a week-at-a-glance daytimer) looks
like this:
"Bo here / smoothies / New Bionicles / swim party / WOW / San Jose's /
South Park / cookies"
It lets me know what we did so that I can apply educationese if I need
to.
There's absolutely no need for Duncan to know what I write down, but it
can help me see what he's doing daily---that he's not just "doing
nothing" all day.
#4 The rule of thumb is one month for each year you were in school. How
many years were *you* schooled? Including kindergarten and college?
As for your children: IF you nag or push or try to "teach" something,
start counting over. So if you've been good for four months but
suddenly have a panic attack and pull out the workbooks and ask for
three pages of math, you get to start deschooling all over. The reason
is that you've lost the trust your child was just beginning to build in
you. Start over. You;re back at Day One.
If your child has been schooled or schooled-at-home, he needs to heal
first before he can even begin to trust you again (Is Mom going to
start with that damned Saxon Math again?) . He may need months of video
games or TV or walking the hills and star-gazing or just veging out to
simply heal himself from the damage of others' lack of trust in him. As
he comes out of this funk, you'll see him searching for a passion. It
may not be the one *you* would like him to develop! <G> And I seriously
doubt it will look much like quadratic equations or Baroque
architecture or memorizing the periodic table or the laws of physics!
It *may* look like skateboarding or getting his first checkbook or
film-making or doll design or Bionicles. FEED that passion---it's your
first step in that new respect/trust bond you're seeking! No matter how
weird and "non-schoolish" it may seem. Roll with it. Put $$$ towards
it---at least what you would put into a new curriculum! As his trust in
you developed, so will his passions grow. EVERY passion will cover all
school subjects.
Toss one at me. I bet I could build a curriculum around it!
When the deschooling process is over, there will be a paradigm shift:
you will SEE all learning as natural and everywhere. You will naturally
relax about the reading and math---and even physics, history and
chemistry. And you won't worry any more.
One more thing: If you DO make that paradigm shift, then there's no
turning back. You KNOW! It's deep in your soul that this is RIGHT. That
unschooling is the ONLY way to learn. That nothing else makes sense.
~Kelly
Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org
________________________________________________________________________
AOL now offers free email to everyone. Find out more about what's free
from AOL at AOL.com.
From: Cameron Parham <acsp2205@...>
OK, this seems likely to be true based on our experiences since we
started
trying to radically unschool in March 2007. I have many more
questions, and
hope that I get to fire off a longer field report but this exchange
touches on
one area of concern for me. While I am getting deschooled, and so
inherently
cannot really unschool actively, how do I best help the kids? In this
exchange
someting like this was said, "You were not unschooling but were doing
your own
thing and letting him do his." I can't quote it as I accidently erased
it.
-=-=-=-
I *think* I wrote: "You weren't unschooling; you were letting him be
while you were busy with other things."
-=-=-=-
Darn. But we are in the midst of deschooling and er...yep, I am still
tring to
do my best at even that! I hope that this quetion is decipherable.
-=-=-=-=-=-
I think I understand what you're asking! <G>
To me, for adults, the DEschooling process is about four things: 1)
seeing that learning happens naturally to everyone around you, 2)
immersing your own self in something important (and including the
children if they want), 3) documenting your children's learning
*without* disturbing it, and 4) NOT nagging or teaching or worrying.
The original poster was busy moving and starting her own business---so
she was actively doing #2. But she wasn't doing #s 1, 3, or 4.
#1 needs to be done often---and not just with your children. Ask
around---lots of people you know: how did you learn what you know?
Especially folks with interesting jobs. Where did they gain their
knowledge of what they're doing. In school? The only professions that
latch on to that "book larnin'" with a passion are doctors and lawyers
(you're one, right Cameron?---that's got to be an impediment for you!
<g> 'Cause you and your colleagues really do believe in that "skule
larnin'." But it can be done! <G>) That's take a little more effort on
your part
Ren has a test (ironic, huh?) that she gives at conferences. It's
*very* telling when you see how many hands go up and down. Ren, you
want to bring that here again?
#2 is about finding a passion. Get involved in something that will take
your mind of nagging your children. SHOW your children what real
learning looks like. Doing something difficult is even better: that way
they get to see you fail a bit too! Duncan and I picked up fencing two
years ago. It was a lot of fun, but a LOT of work. Duncan enjoyed
seeing me get beaten by a child half my size! <G> (But she was GOOD!)
I'd fence at home---just learning the steps and positions so he saw me
working towards my goal (Dunc wasn't as interested in doing the
homework).
I also keep bees: we've had three swarms, but we've also harvested lots
of honey. I garden, but it's a good thing we don't rely on my crops to
feed us---I'm not all that good at producing bumper crops! <g> We cry
(and sometimes laugh) at my failures and revel in my successes. It's
good for children to see that the learning isn't spontaneous but is a
process. Too often children only see us be perfect: we don't burn
supper any more because we've had a lot of practice making the meals we
serve. Make more "strange" suppers---experiment in the kitchen---and
maybe call Domino's when you fail.
Children desperately need to see their parents struggle to learn
something new. Otherwise they believe that we *came* this way! They
don't realize that were kids just they they are! That we've *learned*
everything we know!
#3: Write it down! Learn educationese. And learn how to translate what
your child is doing into educationese. Today, with their earned $$$
(helping my parents move yesterday), Duncan and his friend Bo bought
new Bionicles. They put them together, posed them, took photos of them,
and thought up elaborate stories and adventures for them. They swam for
a few hours and played with the hose. They made banana-strawberries
smoothies. They played on the computer a bit---DeviantArt and WOW. We
all went out to eat at San Jose's---and Duncan spoke to our waiter in
Spanish (just por favor and gracias, but he spoke Spanish!). We all
watched South Park and then baked cookies. They're upstairs now
talking, playing with their Bionicles, and watching a movie.
Based on that day, would anyone like to attempt a daily log of
educationese?
My (required by law) daily log (just a week-at-a-glance daytimer) looks
like this:
"Bo here / smoothies / New Bionicles / swim party / WOW / San Jose's /
South Park / cookies"
It lets me know what we did so that I can apply educationese if I need
to.
There's absolutely no need for Duncan to know what I write down, but it
can help me see what he's doing daily---that he's not just "doing
nothing" all day.
#4 The rule of thumb is one month for each year you were in school. How
many years were *you* schooled? Including kindergarten and college?
As for your children: IF you nag or push or try to "teach" something,
start counting over. So if you've been good for four months but
suddenly have a panic attack and pull out the workbooks and ask for
three pages of math, you get to start deschooling all over. The reason
is that you've lost the trust your child was just beginning to build in
you. Start over. You;re back at Day One.
If your child has been schooled or schooled-at-home, he needs to heal
first before he can even begin to trust you again (Is Mom going to
start with that damned Saxon Math again?) . He may need months of video
games or TV or walking the hills and star-gazing or just veging out to
simply heal himself from the damage of others' lack of trust in him. As
he comes out of this funk, you'll see him searching for a passion. It
may not be the one *you* would like him to develop! <G> And I seriously
doubt it will look much like quadratic equations or Baroque
architecture or memorizing the periodic table or the laws of physics!
It *may* look like skateboarding or getting his first checkbook or
film-making or doll design or Bionicles. FEED that passion---it's your
first step in that new respect/trust bond you're seeking! No matter how
weird and "non-schoolish" it may seem. Roll with it. Put $$$ towards
it---at least what you would put into a new curriculum! As his trust in
you developed, so will his passions grow. EVERY passion will cover all
school subjects.
Toss one at me. I bet I could build a curriculum around it!
When the deschooling process is over, there will be a paradigm shift:
you will SEE all learning as natural and everywhere. You will naturally
relax about the reading and math---and even physics, history and
chemistry. And you won't worry any more.
One more thing: If you DO make that paradigm shift, then there's no
turning back. You KNOW! It's deep in your soul that this is RIGHT. That
unschooling is the ONLY way to learn. That nothing else makes sense.
~Kelly
Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org
________________________________________________________________________
AOL now offers free email to everyone. Find out more about what's free
from AOL at AOL.com.
[email protected]
-----Original Message-----
From: Mara <mamadeluz@...>
Hi everyone,
my son is turning 6 in August and so I wrote a short
letter of intent listing general subjects we will most
likely cover by just living and also saying that we
will most likely meet or surpass the hours required by
law because we believe that learning happens all day -
-=-=-=-
In this homeschool-fearful country, I don't think that's how I'd start
*any*thing with the Superintendent! Especially with all the press
unschooling has been getting lately! Back Off!
-=-=-=-==-
Now this is part of his response:
Quote: Although you have listed the subjects you will
be teaching, I ask that you please provide us with
more information, such as the materials you are
planning to use in the various subject areas, the
number of hours of intstruction you plan to provide,
and how you will monitor L.' progress.
After reviewing this information, I'll be happpy to
grant approval.
-=-=-=-=-
Try this. This is Duncan's "curriculum"---I borrowed it from Carol
Narigon, and Pam Sorooshian, mostly.
*************************************************************************
***
~The World is Our Classroom~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
LifeWorks School for Boys
Course of Study
Elementary Grades
LifeWorks School for Boys is a private full-time homeschool
established in compliance with the Education Code of the State of South
Carolina. Because we believe that the family is the most fundamental
social institution and the preferred means of caring for, preparing,
and training children to be productive members of society, LifeWorks
School promotes and supports a family-centered education through our
independent study program.
At LifeWorks School, independent study, in which Duncan learns
primarily under the immediate direction, guidance, and support of his
parents and other caring and involved adults, offers an outstanding
educational opportunity by providing a natural learning environment,
extensive real-world experience, flexibility of schedule, and the
ability to respond to the specific needs and inclinations of the child.
Duncan’s program is developmentally appropriate, integrated and fully
individualized, and continually built upon his strengths and interests
throughout the year.
English: Duncan will develop knowledge of, and appreciation for
literature and the language, as well as the skills of speaking,
reading, comprehension, listening, spelling, handwriting, and
composition.
Duncan will read from self-chosen or parent-chosen literature on a
regular basis and will engage in reflection on those literature pieces
in a variety of ways, such as: journal writing, book reviews,
conversations, drama based on the books, book clubs. Our educational
goal is for Duncan to read for pleasure, to gain exposure to a wide
variety of genres, and to be able to reflect critically on what he
reads.
Duncan will read content-related non-fiction materials to support his
chosen areas of interest. He will reflect on these pieces in a variety
of ways, such as: journal writing, writing articles for submission to
magazines or newspapers, discussions, or development of a scrapbook in
an area of interest. Our goal is for Duncan to learn to read critically
for information, to understand and be able to reflect on materials
read, to be able to compare them to other sources of information, and
to learn how and where to find written resources as needed.
Writing, spelling and grammar will be covered as part of Duncan’s
natural writing and speaking processes. He will develop his ability to
write creatively, to write letters and lists, to create and write drama
pieces, informational essays, persuasive articles, etc. Our goal is for
Duncan to enjoy writing, to gain expertise in both the writing process
and in technical writing and editing skills, and to develop a sense of
power over the written word
Science: Duncan will develop his knowledge of the biological and
physical sciences, with emphasis on the processes of experimental
inquiry and on the place of humans in ecological systems. He will
relate these to areas of specific personal interests by engaging in
hands-on activities, watching science videos, reading related written
materials, conducting scientific experiments, keeping journals, making
and recording observations, visiting scientists in their work places,
visiting local science museums, participating in science fairs and
workshops, and through cooperative learning. Our goal is for Duncan to
experience a wide range of scientific exposure, to develop a positive
interest in science, to learn to think scientifically, to develop a
respect for the work scientists do, and to understand the importance
science has in daily life and in the overall environment.
Social Sciences: Duncan will develop his understanding of the social
sciences and humanities by reading and discussing fiction and
non-fiction materials, participating in field trips to historic and
politically or culturally significant sites, or through discussion and
debate. Anthropology, economics, psychology, geography, history,
political science, and sociology are fully integrated into his studies
in a wide variety of ways, such as: the use of time lines and maps,
discussion, journal writing, cooking, plays, road trips, invention
building, field trips, and art. Our goal is for Duncan to develop a
foundation for understanding the history, resources, development, and
government of South Carolina and the United States of America; the
development of the American economic system including the role of the
entrepreneur and labor; the relations of persons to their human and
natural environment; eastern and western cultures and civilizations;
and contemporary issues including the wise use of natural resources.
Public service and selfless giving play an important role in our
family's social studies.
Health and Physical Education: Health and physical education will be
fully integrated as a part of daily living skills and participation in
the wider community with an emphasis upon the physical activities that
my be conducive to health and vigor of body and mind. Duncan will learn
to care for his health and physical environment in a variety of ways,
such as: shopping for and preparing food, discussing the necessity of a
healthy diet, participation in fire drills and other emergency
preparedness activities, exercise both as play and as part of a
structured group experience and through camping, hiking, and other
outdoor activity. Our goal is for Duncan to appreciate the necessity of
a healthy body and to develop lifelong habits of regular exercise and
good nutrition.
Visual and Performing Arts: Duncan will develop his knowledge of art,
music, and drama through informal and structured methods in a variety
of ways, such as: art classes, instrumental lessons, choral singing,
listening to various styles of music, learning about the people who
have influenced music through history, or working on individualized or
group projects that relate to music, art, and drama, including acting
and performing in a variety of venues and genres. Our goal is for
Duncan to enjoy a wide variety of art, music, and drama experiences,
including performance, while developing an understanding and
appreciation of the importance of art, music, and drama as creative
expressions of human life experiences.
Mathematics: Duncan will develop mathematical concepts, operational
skills, and problem solving through participation in daily real-world
activities such as cooking, building, shopping, budgeting, computing,
etc. Mathematics materials will be chosen to support his individual
learning style in order to achieve competency in operational skills and
insight into problem-solving procedures. Our goal is for Duncan to
gain a strong conceptual knowledge of mathematics as well as an
appreciation for the daily applications of mathematics in his life.
****************************************************************
-
How do I monitor his progress? I do not like to look
at my child in that way - of course he makes
'progress' - maybe I could just say that I plan to
keep a diary of what we do during the day, and that
would be enough to realize his progress. I so hate
that word.
How do I deal with him and this letter as this is only
my first year of having to report? Any ideas? And what
exactly is an umbrella school?
-=-=-=-
I would say that I will keep a portfolio of samples of his work and a
daytimer in which I'd write what we do each day (you only need 180
days/year.
~Kelly
________________________________________________________________________
AOL now offers free email to everyone. Find out more about what's free
from AOL at AOL.com.
=0
From: Mara <mamadeluz@...>
Hi everyone,
my son is turning 6 in August and so I wrote a short
letter of intent listing general subjects we will most
likely cover by just living and also saying that we
will most likely meet or surpass the hours required by
law because we believe that learning happens all day -
-=-=-=-
In this homeschool-fearful country, I don't think that's how I'd start
*any*thing with the Superintendent! Especially with all the press
unschooling has been getting lately! Back Off!
-=-=-=-==-
Now this is part of his response:
Quote: Although you have listed the subjects you will
be teaching, I ask that you please provide us with
more information, such as the materials you are
planning to use in the various subject areas, the
number of hours of intstruction you plan to provide,
and how you will monitor L.' progress.
After reviewing this information, I'll be happpy to
grant approval.
-=-=-=-=-
Try this. This is Duncan's "curriculum"---I borrowed it from Carol
Narigon, and Pam Sorooshian, mostly.
*************************************************************************
***
~The World is Our Classroom~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
LifeWorks School for Boys
Course of Study
Elementary Grades
LifeWorks School for Boys is a private full-time homeschool
established in compliance with the Education Code of the State of South
Carolina. Because we believe that the family is the most fundamental
social institution and the preferred means of caring for, preparing,
and training children to be productive members of society, LifeWorks
School promotes and supports a family-centered education through our
independent study program.
At LifeWorks School, independent study, in which Duncan learns
primarily under the immediate direction, guidance, and support of his
parents and other caring and involved adults, offers an outstanding
educational opportunity by providing a natural learning environment,
extensive real-world experience, flexibility of schedule, and the
ability to respond to the specific needs and inclinations of the child.
Duncan’s program is developmentally appropriate, integrated and fully
individualized, and continually built upon his strengths and interests
throughout the year.
English: Duncan will develop knowledge of, and appreciation for
literature and the language, as well as the skills of speaking,
reading, comprehension, listening, spelling, handwriting, and
composition.
Duncan will read from self-chosen or parent-chosen literature on a
regular basis and will engage in reflection on those literature pieces
in a variety of ways, such as: journal writing, book reviews,
conversations, drama based on the books, book clubs. Our educational
goal is for Duncan to read for pleasure, to gain exposure to a wide
variety of genres, and to be able to reflect critically on what he
reads.
Duncan will read content-related non-fiction materials to support his
chosen areas of interest. He will reflect on these pieces in a variety
of ways, such as: journal writing, writing articles for submission to
magazines or newspapers, discussions, or development of a scrapbook in
an area of interest. Our goal is for Duncan to learn to read critically
for information, to understand and be able to reflect on materials
read, to be able to compare them to other sources of information, and
to learn how and where to find written resources as needed.
Writing, spelling and grammar will be covered as part of Duncan’s
natural writing and speaking processes. He will develop his ability to
write creatively, to write letters and lists, to create and write drama
pieces, informational essays, persuasive articles, etc. Our goal is for
Duncan to enjoy writing, to gain expertise in both the writing process
and in technical writing and editing skills, and to develop a sense of
power over the written word
Science: Duncan will develop his knowledge of the biological and
physical sciences, with emphasis on the processes of experimental
inquiry and on the place of humans in ecological systems. He will
relate these to areas of specific personal interests by engaging in
hands-on activities, watching science videos, reading related written
materials, conducting scientific experiments, keeping journals, making
and recording observations, visiting scientists in their work places,
visiting local science museums, participating in science fairs and
workshops, and through cooperative learning. Our goal is for Duncan to
experience a wide range of scientific exposure, to develop a positive
interest in science, to learn to think scientifically, to develop a
respect for the work scientists do, and to understand the importance
science has in daily life and in the overall environment.
Social Sciences: Duncan will develop his understanding of the social
sciences and humanities by reading and discussing fiction and
non-fiction materials, participating in field trips to historic and
politically or culturally significant sites, or through discussion and
debate. Anthropology, economics, psychology, geography, history,
political science, and sociology are fully integrated into his studies
in a wide variety of ways, such as: the use of time lines and maps,
discussion, journal writing, cooking, plays, road trips, invention
building, field trips, and art. Our goal is for Duncan to develop a
foundation for understanding the history, resources, development, and
government of South Carolina and the United States of America; the
development of the American economic system including the role of the
entrepreneur and labor; the relations of persons to their human and
natural environment; eastern and western cultures and civilizations;
and contemporary issues including the wise use of natural resources.
Public service and selfless giving play an important role in our
family's social studies.
Health and Physical Education: Health and physical education will be
fully integrated as a part of daily living skills and participation in
the wider community with an emphasis upon the physical activities that
my be conducive to health and vigor of body and mind. Duncan will learn
to care for his health and physical environment in a variety of ways,
such as: shopping for and preparing food, discussing the necessity of a
healthy diet, participation in fire drills and other emergency
preparedness activities, exercise both as play and as part of a
structured group experience and through camping, hiking, and other
outdoor activity. Our goal is for Duncan to appreciate the necessity of
a healthy body and to develop lifelong habits of regular exercise and
good nutrition.
Visual and Performing Arts: Duncan will develop his knowledge of art,
music, and drama through informal and structured methods in a variety
of ways, such as: art classes, instrumental lessons, choral singing,
listening to various styles of music, learning about the people who
have influenced music through history, or working on individualized or
group projects that relate to music, art, and drama, including acting
and performing in a variety of venues and genres. Our goal is for
Duncan to enjoy a wide variety of art, music, and drama experiences,
including performance, while developing an understanding and
appreciation of the importance of art, music, and drama as creative
expressions of human life experiences.
Mathematics: Duncan will develop mathematical concepts, operational
skills, and problem solving through participation in daily real-world
activities such as cooking, building, shopping, budgeting, computing,
etc. Mathematics materials will be chosen to support his individual
learning style in order to achieve competency in operational skills and
insight into problem-solving procedures. Our goal is for Duncan to
gain a strong conceptual knowledge of mathematics as well as an
appreciation for the daily applications of mathematics in his life.
****************************************************************
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How do I monitor his progress? I do not like to look
at my child in that way - of course he makes
'progress' - maybe I could just say that I plan to
keep a diary of what we do during the day, and that
would be enough to realize his progress. I so hate
that word.
How do I deal with him and this letter as this is only
my first year of having to report? Any ideas? And what
exactly is an umbrella school?
-=-=-=-
I would say that I will keep a portfolio of samples of his work and a
daytimer in which I'd write what we do each day (you only need 180
days/year.
~Kelly
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