Re: [unschoolingbasics] Re: Unschooling and "No"
[email protected]
I say let him go naked in the mud, put a bucket/hose by the door to the house, and most importantly, BE there with him while he plays!!
Elissa
"No matter who or what made you what you have become, that doesn't release you from the
responsibility of making yourself over into what you ought to be." ~Ashley Montagu
http://www.myspace.com/elissajillcleaveland
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Elissa
"No matter who or what made you what you have become, that doesn't release you from the
responsibility of making yourself over into what you ought to be." ~Ashley Montagu
http://www.myspace.com/elissajillcleaveland
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
elendil722003
--- In [email protected], "MystikMomma@..."
<MystikMomma@...> wrote:
plays!!
this is my first post after a bit of lurking.
Can I call you MM for short, or just Elissa, lol?
Your comment "BE there when he plays" really caught my attention. As
someone who would not probably be considered an unschooler as yet (I
have been home edding for six years, mostly unstructured approach),
I still find myself torn between housework and playing with the
kids. I really like the idea of getting involved with the kids'
games and although the kids willingly help with chores, etc. I
wonder what your advice would be for getting into a good space to
participate regularly in the kids' games. I get so distracted time-
wise as it is and often my hubbie says I am unorganised and don't
prioritise with tasks. I say this not to bag him, or to elicit
a 'you poor downtrodden wife', response but to give you an idea of
my personality and issues. I am quite a divergent thinker, but I do
try and value order too, lol. I am pretty good at silly, dinosaur
vs. action man scenarios, but find it hard when my 7 year old wants
to play, as she often has a full script in her mind, even for my
character. I find it hard not to tune out when being told "now you
have to be the brown foal and you say....", etc. I hope all of the
more experienced unschoolers won't mind me asking what is probably a
basic question, but go ahead and have a chuckle at me - I'm smiling
as I write, so why not? Does it come naturally to you all to play,
or do you get bored? I am really keen to explore this, as I know
play is a good way to connect with your child on their level.
Thanking you in advance for your thoughts,
Cathy.
<MystikMomma@...> wrote:
>to the house, and most importantly, BE there with him while he
> I say let him go naked in the mud, put a bucket/hose by the door
plays!!
> Elissarelease you from the
> "No matter who or what made you what you have become, that doesn't
> responsibility of making yourself over into what you ought to be."~Ashley Montagu
> http://www.myspace.com/elissajillcleavelandHi MystikMomma and all,
this is my first post after a bit of lurking.
Can I call you MM for short, or just Elissa, lol?
Your comment "BE there when he plays" really caught my attention. As
someone who would not probably be considered an unschooler as yet (I
have been home edding for six years, mostly unstructured approach),
I still find myself torn between housework and playing with the
kids. I really like the idea of getting involved with the kids'
games and although the kids willingly help with chores, etc. I
wonder what your advice would be for getting into a good space to
participate regularly in the kids' games. I get so distracted time-
wise as it is and often my hubbie says I am unorganised and don't
prioritise with tasks. I say this not to bag him, or to elicit
a 'you poor downtrodden wife', response but to give you an idea of
my personality and issues. I am quite a divergent thinker, but I do
try and value order too, lol. I am pretty good at silly, dinosaur
vs. action man scenarios, but find it hard when my 7 year old wants
to play, as she often has a full script in her mind, even for my
character. I find it hard not to tune out when being told "now you
have to be the brown foal and you say....", etc. I hope all of the
more experienced unschoolers won't mind me asking what is probably a
basic question, but go ahead and have a chuckle at me - I'm smiling
as I write, so why not? Does it come naturally to you all to play,
or do you get bored? I am really keen to explore this, as I know
play is a good way to connect with your child on their level.
Thanking you in advance for your thoughts,
Cathy.
Ren Allen
~~I still find myself torn between housework and playing with the
kids~~
Funny thing....I was just writing about this the last few days. If you
get a minute, go google "Advice to Myself" by Louise Erdrich. It's a
really great poem I've been focused on lately. Inspirational stuff that.
Make the housework a time to play with the kids! Truly.
I didn't learn this as a child, so it's a bit counterintuitive for me.
But many unschoolers helped me learn that housework isn't drudgery. It
isn't "boring". It CAN be a game.
Ciara and I will literally POUR water on the floor. We slop around in
it with rags on our feet. It feels really cool to swish around the
floor in soapy water...kinda like Pippi Longstocking.:)
Then we take small towels and start pushing those around with our feet
to dry it all up. It's a big, laughing game and the floor really does
get clean!
I'm not always great at making it a game. But at least I don't nag
them. Once in a while I DO hit a point where I'm like "I can't take
this nasty mess anymore you guys!! HELP me."
I hit that point last night, when every floor felt like a layer of
soda was on it! I had a moment of "this house is so disgusting I can't
STAND it". This morning, I got up and mopped and did some housework
before anyone was awake and miraculously I'm feeling better.:)
A friend is coming over to help me get organized and clean tomorrow.
Cool. The kids will undoubtedly help out too....it's in their nature
to be involved in whatever looks interesting at the moment.
As far as dropping the housework to play....yeah, I think that's
really great. There are times to say "give me a minute, I really feel
a need to finish this first" and there are times to drop it.
What I had written about a couple days ago, on this topic was dishes
specifically. I said that when your child needs you, are the dishes
going to feel sad that you leave them? Look into your child's eyes and
decide if the dishes are more important or your child.
Funny thing is, the dishes will still be there when you get back! I
keep thinking they might go away, but they never do.;)
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
kids~~
Funny thing....I was just writing about this the last few days. If you
get a minute, go google "Advice to Myself" by Louise Erdrich. It's a
really great poem I've been focused on lately. Inspirational stuff that.
Make the housework a time to play with the kids! Truly.
I didn't learn this as a child, so it's a bit counterintuitive for me.
But many unschoolers helped me learn that housework isn't drudgery. It
isn't "boring". It CAN be a game.
Ciara and I will literally POUR water on the floor. We slop around in
it with rags on our feet. It feels really cool to swish around the
floor in soapy water...kinda like Pippi Longstocking.:)
Then we take small towels and start pushing those around with our feet
to dry it all up. It's a big, laughing game and the floor really does
get clean!
I'm not always great at making it a game. But at least I don't nag
them. Once in a while I DO hit a point where I'm like "I can't take
this nasty mess anymore you guys!! HELP me."
I hit that point last night, when every floor felt like a layer of
soda was on it! I had a moment of "this house is so disgusting I can't
STAND it". This morning, I got up and mopped and did some housework
before anyone was awake and miraculously I'm feeling better.:)
A friend is coming over to help me get organized and clean tomorrow.
Cool. The kids will undoubtedly help out too....it's in their nature
to be involved in whatever looks interesting at the moment.
As far as dropping the housework to play....yeah, I think that's
really great. There are times to say "give me a minute, I really feel
a need to finish this first" and there are times to drop it.
What I had written about a couple days ago, on this topic was dishes
specifically. I said that when your child needs you, are the dishes
going to feel sad that you leave them? Look into your child's eyes and
decide if the dishes are more important or your child.
Funny thing is, the dishes will still be there when you get back! I
keep thinking they might go away, but they never do.;)
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
[email protected]
>Cheers, Ren,
>As far as dropping the housework to play....yeah, I think that's
>really great. There are times to say "give me a minute, I really feel
>a need to finish this first" and there are times to drop it.
>
>What I had written about a couple days ago, on this topic was dishes
>specifically. I said that when your child needs you, are the dishes
>going to feel sad that you leave them? Look into your child's eyes and
>decide if the dishes are more important or your child.
>
>Funny thing is, the dishes will still be there when you get back! I
>keep thinking they might go away, but they never do.;)
>
>Ren
>learninginfreedom.com
your honest sharing reminded me we are all human and it's true - we don't
need to maintain a functional relationhip with the dishes. I know my kids
are almost always likely to pitch in if I either stay lighthearted, or confess
honestly that I'm feeling overwhlemed by the mess and could do with some
help. They really humble me when this happens, because they drop what they're
doing and give me a hug and then ask what they can do. Love the idea of how
you washed the floor, hey!
Cathy.
>