Meredith

Emilie wrote: But I do struggle with
how to talk to her about how consumerism in a larger sense is being
relentlessly promoted on tv. It is not whether you buy a certain
brand or even a certain type of item. It is the over all sense of
wanting and feeling that we need all this stuff that we don't need.
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One of the things I've found most helpful in this regard has been to
reframe the concept of "anti-consumerism" in a more positive form.
Coneptually, this is related to the unschooling concept of "living
by principles" so here's a link to a sort of "primer" on that
concept:

http://sandradodd.com/rules

From an unschooling standpoint, the question isn't so much "how do I
talk about consumerism (so my kids understand its wrong)" its more a
matter of "how do I promote a sense of abundance and fulfillment
within my family?"
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When she forgets about tv for a few weeks she
really doesn't think about more stuff.... But the cycle starts all
over again if we have a
rainy week and the tv is on a lot.
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It might be useful to think about why she may be watching more tv
sometimes and how those other factors may *also* be contributing to
a sense of lack or dissatisfaction.

A child stuck inside during a spate of bad weather (to use the above
example) may not be as happy as she is at other times. From one
perspective, her options are limited, so she's seeking to expand
them. What she sees on tv is providing her with possibilites.

As a parent, then, it may be worth look into having other options
available for those sorts of situations. Build a collection of
projects and supplies and games to spark some excitement on a dull
day, or those times when everyone in the family seems to be in a
rut. Y'all know about "strewing" don't you?

http://sandradodd.com/museum
http://sandradodd.com/strewing

Its also worth considering what mom's doing when the tv is on,
especially if its on longer than usual. This isn't meant to be
accusatory, but as someone (I suspect Paul) commented, tv *can* make
it easier to wander off and do our own thing...pay bills, clean the
fridge, surf the net ;) Things that aren't always terribly appealing
to the our kids. Personally, whenever it seems as though Mo has been
watching more tv than usual, I do a little self-check to see if I'm
contributing by being...well, boring! If I'm not "filling Mo's cup"
as it were, she's going to look somewhere else for fulfillment.

Here's another thought - reframing the questions we ask ourselves
helps shift the focus of our attention. If the question is about
consumerism, I'm thinking about the world at large, pollution,
politics, global warming, etc. If the question is about abundance
within my family, I'm thinking about what *I* can do to help the
people I love get more out of life Right Now. That's not to say
thinking about changing the world is somehow wrongheaded, but it
doesn't necessarily improve my relationship with my kid Today.

---Meredith (Mo 6, Ray 13)