Tone
diana jenner
I really appreciate your willingness to help me. But please allow me to
share something
with you real quick. To me, your choice of words here is argumentative and
provocative.
When I just read it to reply - mind you I already read it once earlier today
- I could feel
something like my heart rate increasing, or my "blood pressure rising" as
they say. It's the
same feeling I feel when I'm angry, so I guess I could say I feel really
angry at your choice
of words. Like I said, I sincerely appreciate your desire to advise, but I
just don't see the
tone here as helpful. Combines with another person's reply, it very nearly
had me want to
say "forget it." And I would not be saying "forget it" to a journey
exploring what's best for
my kids, but rather "forget it" to seeking information here. I hope you will
take that
feedback in the spirit in which it was meant, and not make it about me being
resistant to
what you're saying. On the contrary, I am open to the concepts, but the
delivery could get
in the way.
-=-=-
I want to speak to this, as it is something that *I* have felt and dealt
with, I assume the most of us have.
In my experience, this increased blood pressure at something someone else
has written, is the first step to an epiphany in my parenting concepts.
First thing, I will re-read the words using a different voice -- the gentle
sweet auntie voice is my favorite -- to see if it is MY interpretation of
the "tone" or the words themselves. Most often, the reaction in me is my own
chorus of voices responding to the words. I have found it difficult at times
to express my ideas with the "tone" I would use if I were speaking
face-to-face; I have to let the words do their job and hope that my words
will not be read with the voice of the cranky old schoolteacher or
judgmental stranger.
When ideas turn into a *hot button* with my emotions, I know this is a place
in great need of deep contemplation, followed by a spark in my actions -- so
that my thoughts AND actions are in line with my goal of honoring my family
and our unschooling lifestyle.
Breathing, revisiting, breathing, exploring, breathing, accepting,
breathing, breathing...
that's the pattern I follow :)
It also helps to remember the words, though sparked by your words/situation,
are out here for the whole of the community and are generally not meant for
you alone, but for anyone in the same place of stuckness.
--
~diana :)
xoxoxoxo
hannahbearski.blogspot.com
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
share something
with you real quick. To me, your choice of words here is argumentative and
provocative.
When I just read it to reply - mind you I already read it once earlier today
- I could feel
something like my heart rate increasing, or my "blood pressure rising" as
they say. It's the
same feeling I feel when I'm angry, so I guess I could say I feel really
angry at your choice
of words. Like I said, I sincerely appreciate your desire to advise, but I
just don't see the
tone here as helpful. Combines with another person's reply, it very nearly
had me want to
say "forget it." And I would not be saying "forget it" to a journey
exploring what's best for
my kids, but rather "forget it" to seeking information here. I hope you will
take that
feedback in the spirit in which it was meant, and not make it about me being
resistant to
what you're saying. On the contrary, I am open to the concepts, but the
delivery could get
in the way.
-=-=-
I want to speak to this, as it is something that *I* have felt and dealt
with, I assume the most of us have.
In my experience, this increased blood pressure at something someone else
has written, is the first step to an epiphany in my parenting concepts.
First thing, I will re-read the words using a different voice -- the gentle
sweet auntie voice is my favorite -- to see if it is MY interpretation of
the "tone" or the words themselves. Most often, the reaction in me is my own
chorus of voices responding to the words. I have found it difficult at times
to express my ideas with the "tone" I would use if I were speaking
face-to-face; I have to let the words do their job and hope that my words
will not be read with the voice of the cranky old schoolteacher or
judgmental stranger.
When ideas turn into a *hot button* with my emotions, I know this is a place
in great need of deep contemplation, followed by a spark in my actions -- so
that my thoughts AND actions are in line with my goal of honoring my family
and our unschooling lifestyle.
Breathing, revisiting, breathing, exploring, breathing, accepting,
breathing, breathing...
that's the pattern I follow :)
It also helps to remember the words, though sparked by your words/situation,
are out here for the whole of the community and are generally not meant for
you alone, but for anyone in the same place of stuckness.
--
~diana :)
xoxoxoxo
hannahbearski.blogspot.com
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]