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I've had some interesting conversations with some awesome teenagers lately,
and wanted to share some ideas that have come up.

We had a passel of teenagers visiting at different times in the last weeks,
and I am also honored that some of my teenaged son's friends often
spontaneously begin IM conversations with me. These kids are all either unschooled or
attended/currently attend a Sudbury school.


I joked with one of my son's male friends that some of us unschooling moms
talk about fixing up their kids. I laughed that it was probably that we would
prefer they not marry "outside the religion." He laughed, but said he was
certain that it would be a priority when he has kids that they unschool. I asked
him -- what would you think if it was important to your partner that she (he
is straight) work outside the home? He said he'd be happy to stay home and do
music and be with his kids.


One thing I've noticed is that male and female, these kids seem to consider
more than their schooled peers what kind of relationships they want when they
are adults. Maybe it's because unschooling is all about relationship. As
Julian plans his future, he doesn't just think about the work he will do -- he
also thinks about family life. I think particularly for boys, this is unusual.
It's pretty cool.

Kathryn




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Ren Allen

~~One thing I've noticed is that male and female, these kids seem to
consider more than their schooled peers what kind of relationships
they want when they are adults. Maybe it's because unschooling is all
about relationship. ~~

I've noticed the same thing ...it's really cool.
Trevor is dating another unschooled kid. I've had time to reflect on
all that pressure my family put on my to date within our church and
how very different the situations are.

I felt this tremendous pressure and guilt over liking boys that
weren't in our church. It was awful. Yet here is my child dating
another unschooler and while we certainly don't think of unschooling
as any kind of religion, it's important to him that any long term
partnership involves agreement on unschooling.

He has put a lot of thought into it. Both of them have put thought and
conversation into the sex issue. I think they're so far ahead of
myself at that age. There's a level of awareness about big issues that
I tried to avoid. No guilt, no pressure has equaled some very
thoughtful and mature individuals that care deeply about healthy
relationships.

Ren
learninginfreedom.com

Debra Rossing

>I asked him -- what would you think if it was important to your partner
that she (he is straight) work outside the home? He said he'd be happy
to stay home >and do music and be with his kids.
Not too long ago, DS opined that if he married someone who had a job
that paid enough money to live on, he could stay home and unschool the
kids. (Given that DH is the at home parent and has been for all of DS'
memory (since he was not quite 2), it's not too hard to understand where
that idea came from lol)

Deb

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