Back again re: my 3 1/2 yr old daughter
Tonya Matthews
To recap,
My daughter fell on her ankle three weeks ago and hurt it. It never
swelled but she wouldn't walk on it. Two dr appts, one negative x
ray visit , negative blood work (lyme disease, etc) and a
chiropractor visit later, she still won't walk on it.
She'll stand on it periodically and say "Mommy! It doesn't hurt!"
and that's it.
I'm far from a perfect unschooler, unfortunately, but I am *trying*
to honor her not wanting to walk on it even if I do get short with
the issue from time to time. I was told to come back to the dr's if
she wasn't walking on it by last Monday. I've not wanted to go back
b/c they are just going to push both she and I and that's not what I
want, nor is it going to work.
She is a VERY determined girl and does not do things unless they are
her idea, on her time.
Has anyone else gone through something similiar to this? I am at a
loss as to what to do with her. She weighs a heavy 40 lbs and
carrying her around is wearing on my body. I carry her as little as
possible, use strollers and let her crawl (or she slides across the
floor, knees bent, feet under her bum).
I know this will be a blip in time in years from now but, for right
now, it's long.
For the record, she just got out of diapers but, as for a regression
stage, this has lasted pretty long. We're into our 3rd and a half
week.
Input is appreciated,
Thanks
Tonya in Auburn MA
My daughter fell on her ankle three weeks ago and hurt it. It never
swelled but she wouldn't walk on it. Two dr appts, one negative x
ray visit , negative blood work (lyme disease, etc) and a
chiropractor visit later, she still won't walk on it.
She'll stand on it periodically and say "Mommy! It doesn't hurt!"
and that's it.
I'm far from a perfect unschooler, unfortunately, but I am *trying*
to honor her not wanting to walk on it even if I do get short with
the issue from time to time. I was told to come back to the dr's if
she wasn't walking on it by last Monday. I've not wanted to go back
b/c they are just going to push both she and I and that's not what I
want, nor is it going to work.
She is a VERY determined girl and does not do things unless they are
her idea, on her time.
Has anyone else gone through something similiar to this? I am at a
loss as to what to do with her. She weighs a heavy 40 lbs and
carrying her around is wearing on my body. I carry her as little as
possible, use strollers and let her crawl (or she slides across the
floor, knees bent, feet under her bum).
I know this will be a blip in time in years from now but, for right
now, it's long.
For the record, she just got out of diapers but, as for a regression
stage, this has lasted pretty long. We're into our 3rd and a half
week.
Input is appreciated,
Thanks
Tonya in Auburn MA
Tonya Matthews
Just checked my calendar. It's been 2 1/2 weeks, not 3 1/2.. Jeepers,
I guess it *feels* longer..
I guess it *feels* longer..
Kristie Cochran
I'm inclined to believe her. If it didn't hurt her, you'd be catching
her walking and running and then her trying to fake it. I'd take her
back to the doc. She may need to have one of those "boots" to help it heal.
Kristie
her walking and running and then her trying to fake it. I'd take her
back to the doc. She may need to have one of those "boots" to help it heal.
Kristie
flynnzie2
Hi Tonya,
As 3 1/2 year olds can't 'lie' for 3 weeks, if she tells you her ankle
hurts, it most likely does. A sprain would not show up on an x-ray,
and can be painful for well over a month. You could try a soak with
warm water to see if that makes her ankle feel better, and even
support it with an elastic wrap. Just be sure it isn't too tight, and
remove it at night. You might want to consider medicating her with
children's tylenol to relieve pain.
I remember frequent ankle 'twists' from my childhood, and even tho
there was no swelling/bruising, it still hurt. Your daughter needs to
know that you take her seriously, but don't focus too much attention
on her injury. Best of luck, and of course, if her ankle isn't
improving, she needs to see the doctor again, perhaps an orthopedic
physician.
Flynnzie
As 3 1/2 year olds can't 'lie' for 3 weeks, if she tells you her ankle
hurts, it most likely does. A sprain would not show up on an x-ray,
and can be painful for well over a month. You could try a soak with
warm water to see if that makes her ankle feel better, and even
support it with an elastic wrap. Just be sure it isn't too tight, and
remove it at night. You might want to consider medicating her with
children's tylenol to relieve pain.
I remember frequent ankle 'twists' from my childhood, and even tho
there was no swelling/bruising, it still hurt. Your daughter needs to
know that you take her seriously, but don't focus too much attention
on her injury. Best of luck, and of course, if her ankle isn't
improving, she needs to see the doctor again, perhaps an orthopedic
physician.
Flynnzie
alisonslp
Tonya, I'd take her back to the dr. I agree with the other poster who
said if she was just doing it for attention, you would have seen her
forgetting about it and walking/running then going back to "milking
it". It is possible that she chipped a small piece off a bone, had a
stress fracture, or compressed the ankle bones. There may also be
inflammation in the joint that you can't see/feel on the outside.
Have you attempted to give her an anti-inflammatory for a few days
(motrin, advil, etc - not tylenol)? If there is interior swelling,
this will help. You should probably pass this by the dr. first, as
he/she may give you increased dosage limits, or an alternative.
Alison
said if she was just doing it for attention, you would have seen her
forgetting about it and walking/running then going back to "milking
it". It is possible that she chipped a small piece off a bone, had a
stress fracture, or compressed the ankle bones. There may also be
inflammation in the joint that you can't see/feel on the outside.
Have you attempted to give her an anti-inflammatory for a few days
(motrin, advil, etc - not tylenol)? If there is interior swelling,
this will help. You should probably pass this by the dr. first, as
he/she may give you increased dosage limits, or an alternative.
Alison
plaidpanties666
--- In [email protected], "Tonya Matthews"
<godzilla.matthews@...> wrote:
above or is she really saying her ankle is Not hurting, but still
choosing not to walk?
---Meredith
<godzilla.matthews@...> wrote:
> She'll stand on it periodically and say "Mommy! It doesn't hurt!"Tonya, can you please re-address this for clarity? Is there a typo
> and that's it.
>
above or is she really saying her ankle is Not hurting, but still
choosing not to walk?
---Meredith
Lalita
Also too - where was the x-ray taken - was it only of the foot & ankle? I had a friend that her 2 year old fell and complained of pain in ankle - when they took x-rays, nothing. Then her dd was still crying in pain and not walking on it, so she took her to her dr (instead of er) & insisted that they x-ray the whole leg & guess what - she had a broken leg.
Lalita
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Lalita
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
rshoulla
For the record... when I was in high school I came down wrong on my
ankle during a dance move. I went to the emergency room and had an x-
ray and they said it was just sprained. I limped/walked on it for a
week in terrible pain until my mother took me back. They did another
x-ray and sure enough....I'd broken my ankle. I ended up in a cast
for 6 weeks.
I vote you take her back to the doctor.
It would be the rarest of 3yr olds that would have either the
cognitive abilities or the stamina to keep up a charade for so long.
And assuming she did -- there would likely be an underlying cause
maybe you can discover at the doc. Sometimes doctors ask just the
right questions for kids to give a clearer explanation. (Like: When
does your foot hurt? "My foot hurts when my mommy doesn't carry
me.") On the off-chance such a scenario came true, at least you'd
then be able to address the situation more directly.
Good luck,
Robin
ankle during a dance move. I went to the emergency room and had an x-
ray and they said it was just sprained. I limped/walked on it for a
week in terrible pain until my mother took me back. They did another
x-ray and sure enough....I'd broken my ankle. I ended up in a cast
for 6 weeks.
I vote you take her back to the doctor.
It would be the rarest of 3yr olds that would have either the
cognitive abilities or the stamina to keep up a charade for so long.
And assuming she did -- there would likely be an underlying cause
maybe you can discover at the doc. Sometimes doctors ask just the
right questions for kids to give a clearer explanation. (Like: When
does your foot hurt? "My foot hurts when my mommy doesn't carry
me.") On the off-chance such a scenario came true, at least you'd
then be able to address the situation more directly.
Good luck,
Robin
Tonya Matthews
I thank you all for your support.
Here's the update.
We went to the drs tonight and both a nurse practioner (who seemed
alarmed at the duration of this) and a Pedi doc thoroughly examined
her. She came out with flying colors. The Pedi doc laid INTO her
leg, foot and ankle and there wasn't a wince. But when he went to
put her to stand on the floor, she lifted her knees and wouldn't put
her feet down.
For the record, she calls it her 'boo boo foot' but, after a lengthy
conversation with me tonight, she says she doesn't *want* to walk on
it. "I will in two days" The dr thinks it may be for secondary
reasons. The nurse practioner was alarmed but befuddled.
She's going to get xrays tomorrow (she did have full set the first
time, to reply to that inquiry. Hips, knees, ankles) She did have
blood work that looked for lyme or arthritis. She's even missing her
art class (that she enjoys) and a music time with me and a good
friend for the xrays.
I will let you all know tomorrow of the outcome. I am truly baffled.
Warm regards,
Tonya in Auburn MA
Here's the update.
We went to the drs tonight and both a nurse practioner (who seemed
alarmed at the duration of this) and a Pedi doc thoroughly examined
her. She came out with flying colors. The Pedi doc laid INTO her
leg, foot and ankle and there wasn't a wince. But when he went to
put her to stand on the floor, she lifted her knees and wouldn't put
her feet down.
For the record, she calls it her 'boo boo foot' but, after a lengthy
conversation with me tonight, she says she doesn't *want* to walk on
it. "I will in two days" The dr thinks it may be for secondary
reasons. The nurse practioner was alarmed but befuddled.
She's going to get xrays tomorrow (she did have full set the first
time, to reply to that inquiry. Hips, knees, ankles) She did have
blood work that looked for lyme or arthritis. She's even missing her
art class (that she enjoys) and a music time with me and a good
friend for the xrays.
I will let you all know tomorrow of the outcome. I am truly baffled.
Warm regards,
Tonya in Auburn MA
[email protected]
In a message dated 1/24/2007 9:13:56 PM Eastern Standard Time,
godzilla.matthews@... writes:
I will let you all know tomorrow of the outcome. I am truly baffled.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tonya,
I think when your daughter said she doesn't *want* to walk on her ankle, she
is telling you the truth. Her mind is connected to that leg and her head is
telling her (and she's telling you) to keep off it. My 6 y.o. foster son broke
his leg and was in a cast for 6 weeks. He refused to put weight on it after
the cast had been off for more than a week. The ortho said it was normal and
common after a painful injury in a young child. Its been three weeks and he is
now limping around on it, but still barely putting weight on it. It is his
fear of re-injuring his "bad* leg as he calls it that is preventing him from
walking. It sometimes takes the mind a bit longer to heal.
If you do not want to keep carrying her, you might want to try crutches, a
walker, or a wheelchair. We rented a wheelchair for $75.00/month and it was
well worth it. I bet she'd love being pushed around by you and her brothers.
You could turn this into a fun and adventurous memory.
Good luck!
Warmly,
Robin, waiting for that update from the x-rays today...
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
godzilla.matthews@... writes:
I will let you all know tomorrow of the outcome. I am truly baffled.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tonya,
I think when your daughter said she doesn't *want* to walk on her ankle, she
is telling you the truth. Her mind is connected to that leg and her head is
telling her (and she's telling you) to keep off it. My 6 y.o. foster son broke
his leg and was in a cast for 6 weeks. He refused to put weight on it after
the cast had been off for more than a week. The ortho said it was normal and
common after a painful injury in a young child. Its been three weeks and he is
now limping around on it, but still barely putting weight on it. It is his
fear of re-injuring his "bad* leg as he calls it that is preventing him from
walking. It sometimes takes the mind a bit longer to heal.
If you do not want to keep carrying her, you might want to try crutches, a
walker, or a wheelchair. We rented a wheelchair for $75.00/month and it was
well worth it. I bet she'd love being pushed around by you and her brothers.
You could turn this into a fun and adventurous memory.
Good luck!
Warmly,
Robin, waiting for that update from the x-rays today...
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Tonya Matthews
Well,
Sorry I haven't written. I'm kind of exasperated. The xrays were
negative again.
And then that night, at bedtime, she stood on both feet. I gently
said "Oh yay, see? You can stand. Good for you!"
But yesterday morning she woke and wouldn't walk again. And I
decided to stop carrying her so we've been home. I've been giving
her lots of extra hugs and love and she did stand on it again
yesterday.
I'm not sure what we'll do next. I'm going to stay positive. :-)
Thank you
Tonya
Sorry I haven't written. I'm kind of exasperated. The xrays were
negative again.
And then that night, at bedtime, she stood on both feet. I gently
said "Oh yay, see? You can stand. Good for you!"
But yesterday morning she woke and wouldn't walk again. And I
decided to stop carrying her so we've been home. I've been giving
her lots of extra hugs and love and she did stand on it again
yesterday.
I'm not sure what we'll do next. I'm going to stay positive. :-)
Thank you
Tonya
--- In [email protected], ohpurple1@... wrote:
>
> Robin, waiting for that update from the x-rays today...
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
plaidpanties666
--- In [email protected], ohpurple1@... wrote:
still make those plastic inch-worm things for kids to ride on?
---Meredith
>> If you do not want to keep carrying her, you might want to trycrutches, a
> walker, or a wheelchair.Or a stroller. Or a stepstool with wheels on the bottom. Or -do they
still make those plastic inch-worm things for kids to ride on?
---Meredith
Laura Beaudin
Sounds like it might be a psychological issue...
Laura
Laura
On 1/27/07, plaidpanties666 <plaidpanties666@...> wrote:
>
> --- In [email protected], ohpurple1@... wrote:
> >> If you do not want to keep carrying her, you might want to try
> crutches, a
> > walker, or a wheelchair.
>
> Or a stroller. Or a stepstool with wheels on the bottom. Or -do they
> still make those plastic inch-worm things for kids to ride on?
> ---Meredith
>
>
>
>
> Yahoo! Groups Links
>
>
>
>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Tonya Matthews
I just meant carrying her to the car, up and down the stairs etc.
She will crawl and she will slide across the floor on her knees with
feet under her butt.
I have used shopping carts and strollers in public places for long
distances.
Thanks :)
Tonya
--- In [email protected], "plaidpanties666"
<plaidpanties666@...> wrote:
She will crawl and she will slide across the floor on her knees with
feet under her butt.
I have used shopping carts and strollers in public places for long
distances.
Thanks :)
Tonya
--- In [email protected], "plaidpanties666"
<plaidpanties666@...> wrote:
>
> --- In [email protected], ohpurple1@ wrote:
> >> If you do not want to keep carrying her, you might want to try
> crutches, a
> > walker, or a wheelchair.
>
> Or a stroller. Or a stepstool with wheels on the bottom. Or -do they
> still make those plastic inch-worm things for kids to ride on?
> ---Meredith
>
Melissa
Something I've been meaning to write and delayed on..is fear. Sam, when he was about
two, jumped off a table and got a hairline fracture on his tibia. Long after it was healed, he
was unable to walk on it. He had internalized the fear of pain, and it was very difficult for
him to 1) trust his body and 2) trust that it was healed. He called it his 'booboo foot' for
over a year.
It's entirely possible that she pulled a ligament or some such. Those can be slow to heal,
and even after being okay catch you off guard with twinges. If she is afraid of it hurting,
even if it doesn't hurt all the time, it's possible that ghost pain pops up, or she doesn't
know how to verbalize that she's afraid it will hurt. Especially if it does twinge every once
in a while, then she KNOWS that feeling okay now doesn't always mean that it will feel
okay.
I will say that most kids at five yo aren't coordinated enough for crutches, and it's difficult
to find them that small. However, united cerebral palsy often has walkers in that size, and
they have rental programs or even let you borrow for free. We got one for a few weeks
when Emily's spiderbite turned septic.
--- In [email protected], "Tonya Matthews" <godzilla.matthews@...>
wrote:
two, jumped off a table and got a hairline fracture on his tibia. Long after it was healed, he
was unable to walk on it. He had internalized the fear of pain, and it was very difficult for
him to 1) trust his body and 2) trust that it was healed. He called it his 'booboo foot' for
over a year.
It's entirely possible that she pulled a ligament or some such. Those can be slow to heal,
and even after being okay catch you off guard with twinges. If she is afraid of it hurting,
even if it doesn't hurt all the time, it's possible that ghost pain pops up, or she doesn't
know how to verbalize that she's afraid it will hurt. Especially if it does twinge every once
in a while, then she KNOWS that feeling okay now doesn't always mean that it will feel
okay.
I will say that most kids at five yo aren't coordinated enough for crutches, and it's difficult
to find them that small. However, united cerebral palsy often has walkers in that size, and
they have rental programs or even let you borrow for free. We got one for a few weeks
when Emily's spiderbite turned septic.
--- In [email protected], "Tonya Matthews" <godzilla.matthews@...>
wrote:
>
> Well,
>
> Sorry I haven't written. I'm kind of exasperated. The xrays were
> negative again.
>
> And then that night, at bedtime, she stood on both feet. I gently
> said "Oh yay, see? You can stand. Good for you!"
> But yesterday morning she woke and wouldn't walk again. And I
> decided to stop carrying her so we've been home. I've been giving
> her lots of extra hugs and love and she did stand on it again
> yesterday.
>