encouraging healthy food...
susangould1
Hi,
I am from fairly new to unschooling and have been watching in the
back ground. So far so good. we are really enjoying it and we are
all less tense and stressed out! My main problem is that my dd (8ys
old) and ds (6 yrs old) have had poor eating habits from the
beginning. I nursed them both for 1.5 yrs but ever since they
started eating solid foods they will not eat veggies and fruit (even
hidden in food - they claim it doesn't taste good!) I have tried
preparing them every single way possible! My husband and I love
fruits and vegetables and they are always available. My ds won't
even try fruit or veggies. Not even a taste! So I have long given
up. Now that we are unschooling -still deschooling - what should I
do? I have let it go for years and they still do NOT choose healthy
food over sugary/salty stuff. I find if I do not at least insist
they eat their protein and carbs at meal times (pretty much the only
things they will eat) they won't eat anything and go right to desert.
My dd is obsessed/addicted to sweets. How do I get out of this
cycle? Are you SURE that if I let them choose what they want to eat
that they will eventually pick healthy things? How long will this
take? And how do I get my son to try fruits and veggies etc.?? He
will not even put them in his mouth!
Confused and distressed
Sue from Ontario, Canada
I am from fairly new to unschooling and have been watching in the
back ground. So far so good. we are really enjoying it and we are
all less tense and stressed out! My main problem is that my dd (8ys
old) and ds (6 yrs old) have had poor eating habits from the
beginning. I nursed them both for 1.5 yrs but ever since they
started eating solid foods they will not eat veggies and fruit (even
hidden in food - they claim it doesn't taste good!) I have tried
preparing them every single way possible! My husband and I love
fruits and vegetables and they are always available. My ds won't
even try fruit or veggies. Not even a taste! So I have long given
up. Now that we are unschooling -still deschooling - what should I
do? I have let it go for years and they still do NOT choose healthy
food over sugary/salty stuff. I find if I do not at least insist
they eat their protein and carbs at meal times (pretty much the only
things they will eat) they won't eat anything and go right to desert.
My dd is obsessed/addicted to sweets. How do I get out of this
cycle? Are you SURE that if I let them choose what they want to eat
that they will eventually pick healthy things? How long will this
take? And how do I get my son to try fruits and veggies etc.?? He
will not even put them in his mouth!
Confused and distressed
Sue from Ontario, Canada
Ren Allen
~~I have let it go for years and they still do NOT choose healthy
food over sugary/salty stuff. I find if I do not at least insist
they eat their protein and carbs at meal times (pretty much the only
things they will eat) they won't eat anything and go right to desert.~~
Quit making dessert. Let me explain....
by making something sweet for AFTER a meal, you are automatically
setting it up to be more desirable. When we make a sweet dessert, it
gets served with everything else that is for the meal. There are many
times my children choose to leave it until last, by choice, but there
is never any restriction on which dishes they eat or in what order.
Saving dessert until after a meal sets it up to be THE desired item.
If you're making it for the meal, just serve it all up and let
everyone eat what they want. Seriously.
Jalen ate nothing but the dessert item for dinner once. It had
raspberries and cream, so at least he was getting some form of fiber
and protein.:)
Make desserts that have doses of great ingredients. Whole wheat can be
baked into so many, many items....fruits make wonderful sweet dishes
in combination with other ingredients or on their own (but you said
they don't like fruit alone right?).
What about providing a lot of dips for them? I've found that if a
young child can dip food, they're more likely to eat it. Ketchup,
peanut butter (or other nut butters) whipped cream, sour cream, hummus
etc....are all ways to offer up another food while making dipping fun.
Dessert can be almost the healthiest thing you serve!! I really don't
understand why there has to be this "no sweets in order for children
to be healthy" attitude (not saying YOU said this, just the general
discussion) because if a parent is truly concerned about health, then
they should be making foods that the child enjoys rather than
restricting what the child shouldn't have.
If there are real (not parental fears) health issues, then why not
look at it as an adventure? Why not bake and cook all sorts of fun
foods that the child might want to try? Why go all restrictive and
tell them what they can't have? Kids want to be safe, if they
understand something is truly making them very sick, why can't the
parent find a suitable alternative to the thing they desire?
(responding here to the posts about children that were truly sick)
Once again, "no" closes doors where an attitude of "let's explore this
situation" brings about a number of solutions in which the child can
be empowered to choose.
Anyway, don't set dessert up to be the most desirable dish, just serve
it. Make your desserts full of yummy AND healthy ingredients and let
them go to town. Buy a multi-vitamin and trust that they will
eventually branch out and try more and more foods....but probably not
if you make a big deal about it. The less said, the better right now.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
food over sugary/salty stuff. I find if I do not at least insist
they eat their protein and carbs at meal times (pretty much the only
things they will eat) they won't eat anything and go right to desert.~~
Quit making dessert. Let me explain....
by making something sweet for AFTER a meal, you are automatically
setting it up to be more desirable. When we make a sweet dessert, it
gets served with everything else that is for the meal. There are many
times my children choose to leave it until last, by choice, but there
is never any restriction on which dishes they eat or in what order.
Saving dessert until after a meal sets it up to be THE desired item.
If you're making it for the meal, just serve it all up and let
everyone eat what they want. Seriously.
Jalen ate nothing but the dessert item for dinner once. It had
raspberries and cream, so at least he was getting some form of fiber
and protein.:)
Make desserts that have doses of great ingredients. Whole wheat can be
baked into so many, many items....fruits make wonderful sweet dishes
in combination with other ingredients or on their own (but you said
they don't like fruit alone right?).
What about providing a lot of dips for them? I've found that if a
young child can dip food, they're more likely to eat it. Ketchup,
peanut butter (or other nut butters) whipped cream, sour cream, hummus
etc....are all ways to offer up another food while making dipping fun.
Dessert can be almost the healthiest thing you serve!! I really don't
understand why there has to be this "no sweets in order for children
to be healthy" attitude (not saying YOU said this, just the general
discussion) because if a parent is truly concerned about health, then
they should be making foods that the child enjoys rather than
restricting what the child shouldn't have.
If there are real (not parental fears) health issues, then why not
look at it as an adventure? Why not bake and cook all sorts of fun
foods that the child might want to try? Why go all restrictive and
tell them what they can't have? Kids want to be safe, if they
understand something is truly making them very sick, why can't the
parent find a suitable alternative to the thing they desire?
(responding here to the posts about children that were truly sick)
Once again, "no" closes doors where an attitude of "let's explore this
situation" brings about a number of solutions in which the child can
be empowered to choose.
Anyway, don't set dessert up to be the most desirable dish, just serve
it. Make your desserts full of yummy AND healthy ingredients and let
them go to town. Buy a multi-vitamin and trust that they will
eventually branch out and try more and more foods....but probably not
if you make a big deal about it. The less said, the better right now.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
Ariannah Armstrong
Ren Allen wrote:
Joanna, who changes food preferences *daily* these days. One day she'll
think something is totally YUMMY and the next day, yuk.
Joanna was the person who ate the most of her candy houses at Christmas,
and yet these days she's lost her enthusiasm for candy.
By letting her eat what she wanted (a day, or even a few days without
'adequate' nutrition won't scar them for life), it all balanced out in
the end. For instance, Joanna is less keen on green leafy salads
regardless of dressing, but loves celery, sometimes with dip, a pita
wrap which she loves to fill with colorful veggies (red peppers, green
peppers, sprouts - depends on type - grated carrots or sliced carrots),
an eye-candy array of pleasant looking ripe fruit. (kids respond well
to eye appeal, especially the visual type learners) A pita which THEY
choose the ingredients to fill gets a lot of things in they'll enjoy.
When she sees me having a few organic sunflower seeds and enjoying them
(I don't initiate for her to have some), she wants some "too", and I
give it to her.
If I show a desire and craving for the best that grows, and she sees me
biting into a delicious red pepper with a tasty dip, and really enjoying
it (not exaggeratedly, but genuine), she'll want to try it too. She may
not like it, so we explore other options - together.
We've never been a "dessert" family. It's just never dawned on us that
it's something people "do"... I never grew up with dessert, much (except
for special dinners)
When we are stocked up on our fruit and crackers and snacky type foods,
they eat lots of that between their meals (plain fruit mostly digests
best on an empty stomach, and doesn't mix well with heavy foods) so when
suppertime hits, we relax and don't worry if today Joanna doesn't like
the basmati rice which she ate with gusto yesterday - she can always
have a piece of pita and whatever (she rarely turns those down), or some
pretzels as a snack.
My kids help me pick out the fruits and veggies in the produce section
too. She begged me for the bagged organic baby carrots one day. I said
"sure". I didn't say, "Now make sure you eat them this time, as I don't
want to throw them away like usual" (it was tempting though!) And when
I got home they barely made it to the fridge!
Sorry this post is so long. It takes less time to "say" verbally in
story-telling form than it does to read.
Ariannah in Nova Scotia
--
"May we all have a vision now and then
Of a world where every neighbour is a friend"
Abba "Happy New Year" 1980
Personal Blog: http://ec.lecti.ca
> Jalen ate nothing but the dessert item for dinner once. It hadI agree with Ren, and I know this from experience with my 5 year old,
> raspberries and cream, so at least he was getting some form of fiber
> and protein.:)
Joanna, who changes food preferences *daily* these days. One day she'll
think something is totally YUMMY and the next day, yuk.
Joanna was the person who ate the most of her candy houses at Christmas,
and yet these days she's lost her enthusiasm for candy.
By letting her eat what she wanted (a day, or even a few days without
'adequate' nutrition won't scar them for life), it all balanced out in
the end. For instance, Joanna is less keen on green leafy salads
regardless of dressing, but loves celery, sometimes with dip, a pita
wrap which she loves to fill with colorful veggies (red peppers, green
peppers, sprouts - depends on type - grated carrots or sliced carrots),
an eye-candy array of pleasant looking ripe fruit. (kids respond well
to eye appeal, especially the visual type learners) A pita which THEY
choose the ingredients to fill gets a lot of things in they'll enjoy.
When she sees me having a few organic sunflower seeds and enjoying them
(I don't initiate for her to have some), she wants some "too", and I
give it to her.
If I show a desire and craving for the best that grows, and she sees me
biting into a delicious red pepper with a tasty dip, and really enjoying
it (not exaggeratedly, but genuine), she'll want to try it too. She may
not like it, so we explore other options - together.
We've never been a "dessert" family. It's just never dawned on us that
it's something people "do"... I never grew up with dessert, much (except
for special dinners)
When we are stocked up on our fruit and crackers and snacky type foods,
they eat lots of that between their meals (plain fruit mostly digests
best on an empty stomach, and doesn't mix well with heavy foods) so when
suppertime hits, we relax and don't worry if today Joanna doesn't like
the basmati rice which she ate with gusto yesterday - she can always
have a piece of pita and whatever (she rarely turns those down), or some
pretzels as a snack.
My kids help me pick out the fruits and veggies in the produce section
too. She begged me for the bagged organic baby carrots one day. I said
"sure". I didn't say, "Now make sure you eat them this time, as I don't
want to throw them away like usual" (it was tempting though!) And when
I got home they barely made it to the fridge!
Sorry this post is so long. It takes less time to "say" verbally in
story-telling form than it does to read.
Ariannah in Nova Scotia
--
"May we all have a vision now and then
Of a world where every neighbour is a friend"
Abba "Happy New Year" 1980
Personal Blog: http://ec.lecti.ca
Meridith Richardson
Do you believe it is wrong to NOT keep sweets in the
house? I make apples with a RAW almond butter honey
dip etc? BUt to not keep cake and cookies, even if
she asks for them?
Meridith
--- Ren Allen <starsuncloud@...> wrote:
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house? I make apples with a RAW almond butter honey
dip etc? BUt to not keep cake and cookies, even if
she asks for them?
Meridith
--- Ren Allen <starsuncloud@...> wrote:
> ~~I have let it go for years and they still do NOT__________________________________________________
> choose healthy
> food over sugary/salty stuff. I find if I do not at
> least insist
> they eat their protein and carbs at meal times
> (pretty much the only
> things they will eat) they won't eat anything and go
> right to desert.~~
>
>
> Quit making dessert. Let me explain....
> by making something sweet for AFTER a meal, you are
> automatically
> setting it up to be more desirable. When we make a
> sweet dessert, it
> gets served with everything else that is for the
> meal. There are many
> times my children choose to leave it until last, by
> choice, but there
> is never any restriction on which dishes they eat or
> in what order.
>
> Saving dessert until after a meal sets it up to be
> THE desired item.
> If you're making it for the meal, just serve it all
> up and let
> everyone eat what they want. Seriously.
>
> Jalen ate nothing but the dessert item for dinner
> once. It had
> raspberries and cream, so at least he was getting
> some form of fiber
> and protein.:)
>
> Make desserts that have doses of great ingredients.
> Whole wheat can be
> baked into so many, many items....fruits make
> wonderful sweet dishes
> in combination with other ingredients or on their
> own (but you said
> they don't like fruit alone right?).
>
> What about providing a lot of dips for them? I've
> found that if a
> young child can dip food, they're more likely to eat
> it. Ketchup,
> peanut butter (or other nut butters) whipped cream,
> sour cream, hummus
> etc....are all ways to offer up another food while
> making dipping fun.
>
> Dessert can be almost the healthiest thing you
> serve!! I really don't
> understand why there has to be this "no sweets in
> order for children
> to be healthy" attitude (not saying YOU said this,
> just the general
> discussion) because if a parent is truly concerned
> about health, then
> they should be making foods that the child enjoys
> rather than
> restricting what the child shouldn't have.
>
> If there are real (not parental fears) health
> issues, then why not
> look at it as an adventure? Why not bake and cook
> all sorts of fun
> foods that the child might want to try? Why go all
> restrictive and
> tell them what they can't have? Kids want to be
> safe, if they
> understand something is truly making them very sick,
> why can't the
> parent find a suitable alternative to the thing they
> desire?
> (responding here to the posts about children that
> were truly sick)
>
> Once again, "no" closes doors where an attitude of
> "let's explore this
> situation" brings about a number of solutions in
> which the child can
> be empowered to choose.
>
> Anyway, don't set dessert up to be the most
> desirable dish, just serve
> it. Make your desserts full of yummy AND healthy
> ingredients and let
> them go to town. Buy a multi-vitamin and trust that
> they will
> eventually branch out and try more and more
> foods....but probably not
> if you make a big deal about it. The less said, the
> better right now.
>
> Ren
> learninginfreedom.com
>
>
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Manisha Kher
--- susangould1 <ggould1@...> wrote:
desserts. By healthy I do NOT mean low fat or low
sugar. I mean higher in protein and complex
carbohydrates. You can do lots of things with eggs,
milk, whole wheat and oatmeal.
We don't do desserts after a meal. My kid's appetites
are not large enough to be able to enjoy a dessert
after a meal. In my family, sweet goodies are eaten as
snacks any time of the day.
veggies when I was that age. I mother went thru
"phases" when she would try to get me to eat a
spoonful of veggie. Caused nothing but bad memories
for me. I grew up essentially on bread with jam and
milk.
Then somewhere around the age of 13 or 14, I started
eating vegetables. I liked them. I don't know what
changed, but I'm a big veggie eater now. I don't know
what changed, but in hindsight my mother's efforts to
get me to eat were a waste of time.
Manisha
__________________________________________________
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> Hi,I want to second Ren's suggestion of making healthy
> I find if I do not at
> least insist
> they eat their protein and carbs at meal times
> (pretty much the only
> things they will eat) they won't eat anything and go
> right to desert.
desserts. By healthy I do NOT mean low fat or low
sugar. I mean higher in protein and complex
carbohydrates. You can do lots of things with eggs,
milk, whole wheat and oatmeal.
We don't do desserts after a meal. My kid's appetites
are not large enough to be able to enjoy a dessert
after a meal. In my family, sweet goodies are eaten as
snacks any time of the day.
> Are you SURE that if I let them choose whatI think taste buds change as kids grow older. I hated
> they want to eat
> that they will eventually pick healthy things? How
> long will this
> take? And how do I get my son to try fruits and
> veggies etc.?? He
> will not even put them in his mouth!
veggies when I was that age. I mother went thru
"phases" when she would try to get me to eat a
spoonful of veggie. Caused nothing but bad memories
for me. I grew up essentially on bread with jam and
milk.
Then somewhere around the age of 13 or 14, I started
eating vegetables. I liked them. I don't know what
changed, but I'm a big veggie eater now. I don't know
what changed, but in hindsight my mother's efforts to
get me to eat were a waste of time.
Manisha
__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around
http://mail.yahoo.com
plaidpanties666
--- In [email protected], "susangould1"
<ggould1@...> wrote:
Insisting that they eat certain foods at certain times in a certain
order doesn't sound like "letting it go" to me - and probably
doesn't feel that way to the kids. From their perspective, they
don't have a lot of control over what they eat, so they are grabbing
what they can as hard as they can.
Are they involved in the menu planning and shopping? Are they
allowed to choose what kinds of foods y'all buy and have on hand -
really choose, not "choose from the subset of foods that don't make
mom cringe"?
here. Mo's not a big veggie eater, but she loves to "wild harvest"
foods or eat directly from the garden. I've shown her what's edible
in the yard, and periodically she goes out and grazes! I'm a big fan
of edible flowers, personally, so I plant a lot of those. I've never
told her she "should" eat them, or talked about them in terms of
nutrition at all (actually it started out of desparation, we have
some very toxic weeds around here, and I didn't want to just
say "don't eat plants"!).
Your ds may have reached a point of not trusting that you will offer
him things that appeal to him, so he's refusing everything, even if
he might have tried it left to his own devices. Kids can be very
conservative about new foods - some have to see other people eating
them several times before they feel comfortable trying something
new. If you're concerned, find a multivitamin he likes so you don't
feel the urge to push, as it were.
It seems like a little thing, but changing our words -especially the
ones inside our heads- helps to alter our perspective. Right now
your perspective is your dd is "out of control" wrt food. Even if
you aren't saying that out loud, you are sending her that message in
lots of little ways. That's a dangerous message to send! She's going
to have to negotiate a world full of a million different food-
choices every day for the rest of her life, so the last thing you
want her to feel is "out of control".
Ren had great things to say about desserts, here's my addition:
When trying to make good food taste good, I like to keep in mind the
wisdom of Julia Child: fat is flavor.
I love to add nut-meal to baked goods - I even like to toss some in
boxed cake mixes. We all seem to enjoy that, and the added protein
goes a long way to letting me feel comfortable about cupcakes for
breakfast (that was yesterday). The protein also lets everyone
feel "full" sooner, so things don't get eaten as quickly. That helps
fuel a sense of abundance, too, which cuts down on some of
the "competitive eating" that goes on around here.
I also like to do all my baking with real butter, not margarine or
shortening. Its noticably more flavorful *and* more nutritious. Win-
win. I use a modified biscuit recipe for cookies - lots of butter
and/or nut butter, maybe some nut-meal *and* its ready to roll out
for cookie cutters without having to chill for an hour, which gets
my 5yr old all excited. A couple weeks ago we divided the dough up
and made three different color cookies, and then swirled cookies.
Oooooh Aaaaaaah.
I'm glad you're looking for ways to encourage healthy eating
*besides* saying No. That's a big step of trust right there! Now
take a big deep breath and take a few more tiny little steps ;)
---Meredith (Mo 5, Ray 13)
<ggould1@...> wrote:
>>I have let it go for years and they still do NOT choose healthyonly
> food over sugary/salty stuff. I find if I do not at least insist
> they eat their protein and carbs at meal times (pretty much the
> things they will eat) they won't eat anything and go right todesert.
Insisting that they eat certain foods at certain times in a certain
order doesn't sound like "letting it go" to me - and probably
doesn't feel that way to the kids. From their perspective, they
don't have a lot of control over what they eat, so they are grabbing
what they can as hard as they can.
Are they involved in the menu planning and shopping? Are they
allowed to choose what kinds of foods y'all buy and have on hand -
really choose, not "choose from the subset of foods that don't make
mom cringe"?
> And how do I get my son to try fruits and veggies etc.?? HeDo they not drink juice? That's our main source of fruit around
> will not even put them in his mouth!
here. Mo's not a big veggie eater, but she loves to "wild harvest"
foods or eat directly from the garden. I've shown her what's edible
in the yard, and periodically she goes out and grazes! I'm a big fan
of edible flowers, personally, so I plant a lot of those. I've never
told her she "should" eat them, or talked about them in terms of
nutrition at all (actually it started out of desparation, we have
some very toxic weeds around here, and I didn't want to just
say "don't eat plants"!).
Your ds may have reached a point of not trusting that you will offer
him things that appeal to him, so he's refusing everything, even if
he might have tried it left to his own devices. Kids can be very
conservative about new foods - some have to see other people eating
them several times before they feel comfortable trying something
new. If you're concerned, find a multivitamin he likes so you don't
feel the urge to push, as it were.
> My dd is obsessed/addicted to sweets. How do I get out of thisI'd start with a language shift - how 'bout "loves" or "glories in"?
> cycle?
It seems like a little thing, but changing our words -especially the
ones inside our heads- helps to alter our perspective. Right now
your perspective is your dd is "out of control" wrt food. Even if
you aren't saying that out loud, you are sending her that message in
lots of little ways. That's a dangerous message to send! She's going
to have to negotiate a world full of a million different food-
choices every day for the rest of her life, so the last thing you
want her to feel is "out of control".
Ren had great things to say about desserts, here's my addition:
When trying to make good food taste good, I like to keep in mind the
wisdom of Julia Child: fat is flavor.
I love to add nut-meal to baked goods - I even like to toss some in
boxed cake mixes. We all seem to enjoy that, and the added protein
goes a long way to letting me feel comfortable about cupcakes for
breakfast (that was yesterday). The protein also lets everyone
feel "full" sooner, so things don't get eaten as quickly. That helps
fuel a sense of abundance, too, which cuts down on some of
the "competitive eating" that goes on around here.
I also like to do all my baking with real butter, not margarine or
shortening. Its noticably more flavorful *and* more nutritious. Win-
win. I use a modified biscuit recipe for cookies - lots of butter
and/or nut butter, maybe some nut-meal *and* its ready to roll out
for cookie cutters without having to chill for an hour, which gets
my 5yr old all excited. A couple weeks ago we divided the dough up
and made three different color cookies, and then swirled cookies.
Oooooh Aaaaaaah.
I'm glad you're looking for ways to encourage healthy eating
*besides* saying No. That's a big step of trust right there! Now
take a big deep breath and take a few more tiny little steps ;)
---Meredith (Mo 5, Ray 13)
Genevieve Labonte
I rarely post here, mostly read messages ;-) But, wanted to tell you
what we do.
I have a 5 yo. that *never* liked fruit. I think the only fruit he
tasted as a fruit is a banana. Other than that, even the purées I made
as a baby he gaged on or showed distate to. Veggies? Well, except
mashed potatoes and corn-from-a-can, none other.
He lived to 4 3/4yo on breastmilk, cheerios, mashed potates, white rice,
ice cream, cheese, real apple juice and not much else I can think of.
He's never been pressured to taste, although I will ask him if he wants
to when I make something new, and as of the last month maybe, he started
answering " What does it taste like?". I give him the most honest
answer I have (with brother's sometimes chiming in) and he sometimes
chooses to try.
He started eating commercial fruit purées lately and loves those. I keep
a stash that I know he likes in arms reach. And also, some puréed soups
are good. Not everyone and not everytime. But, he started asking for
some of these soups, so he likes them, I guess ;-)
So, don't pressure it, don't hide it, be honest about what's in it, and
find new meals to try. Be patient, loving and open-minded about the
foods they choose. Have them help making a meal. Make the tomato sauce
for the pizza ;-) Add pineapple. Make yours special, add roasted
onions, olives, and offer them to take theirs and yours... Show them
how veggies are part of the foods we eat and not some big-bad food we
HAVE TO eat.
Genevieve, mom to 4 boys...
I have let it go for years and they still do NOT choose healthy
food over sugary/salty stuff. I find if I do not at least insist
they eat their protein and carbs at meal times (pretty much the only
things they will eat) they won't eat anything and go right to desert.
My dd is obsessed/addicted to sweets. How do I get out of this
cycle? Are you SURE that if I let them choose what they want to eat
that they will eventually pick healthy things? How long will this
take? And how do I get my son to try fruits and veggies etc.?? He
will not even put them in his mouth!
.
<http://geo.yahoo.com/serv?s=97359714/grpId=12789513/grpspId=1705081972/
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what we do.
I have a 5 yo. that *never* liked fruit. I think the only fruit he
tasted as a fruit is a banana. Other than that, even the purées I made
as a baby he gaged on or showed distate to. Veggies? Well, except
mashed potatoes and corn-from-a-can, none other.
He lived to 4 3/4yo on breastmilk, cheerios, mashed potates, white rice,
ice cream, cheese, real apple juice and not much else I can think of.
He's never been pressured to taste, although I will ask him if he wants
to when I make something new, and as of the last month maybe, he started
answering " What does it taste like?". I give him the most honest
answer I have (with brother's sometimes chiming in) and he sometimes
chooses to try.
He started eating commercial fruit purées lately and loves those. I keep
a stash that I know he likes in arms reach. And also, some puréed soups
are good. Not everyone and not everytime. But, he started asking for
some of these soups, so he likes them, I guess ;-)
So, don't pressure it, don't hide it, be honest about what's in it, and
find new meals to try. Be patient, loving and open-minded about the
foods they choose. Have them help making a meal. Make the tomato sauce
for the pizza ;-) Add pineapple. Make yours special, add roasted
onions, olives, and offer them to take theirs and yours... Show them
how veggies are part of the foods we eat and not some big-bad food we
HAVE TO eat.
Genevieve, mom to 4 boys...
I have let it go for years and they still do NOT choose healthy
food over sugary/salty stuff. I find if I do not at least insist
they eat their protein and carbs at meal times (pretty much the only
things they will eat) they won't eat anything and go right to desert.
My dd is obsessed/addicted to sweets. How do I get out of this
cycle? Are you SURE that if I let them choose what they want to eat
that they will eventually pick healthy things? How long will this
take? And how do I get my son to try fruits and veggies etc.?? He
will not even put them in his mouth!
.
<http://geo.yahoo.com/serv?s=97359714/grpId=12789513/grpspId=1705081972/
msgId=20442/stime=1168270130/nc1=4025370/nc2=3848527/nc3=3>
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Deb Lewis
***Do you believe it is wrong to NOT keep sweets in the
house? I make apples with a RAW almond butter honey
dip etc? BUt to not keep cake and cookies, even if
she asks for them?***
I don't think it's wrong but it might be problematic.
Some people are not sweet eaters and it would be natural for them to have
few if any sweets in the house.
Some people are not meat eaters and so it would be natural for them to have
little or no meat on hand.
When our kids are little we eat the way we eat and don't necessarily think
about introducing to them things we would not normally keep on hand.
When our kids are older and especially old enough to ask questions about
food and be curious about what they see other people eating then I think
that's our cue to help them explore. The way we do when our little babies
first show an interest in what we're eating; we offer them little tastes of
what we have.
In a case where parents have strong feelings about a food like sweets and a
child is showing interest in those things (because she's seen other people
eat them or has been at a house where those things are abundant) then I
think it's important to address the child's need to explore. I don't think
that means filling the house with every possible sweet treat, but instead,
going about helping her try the thing she's asking about.
I think it's likely that when we deny a thing a child is interested in, it
makes that thing seem more important - it creates more of a desire for that
thing.
So, what if your child loves sweets? What if she tries them and wants to
eat a lot of sweets? Can you handle that? Could you find a way to be ok
with that, maybe making homemade things with ingredients you feel better
about?
Your child is going to try sweets. She will be at a friends house someday
and they will offer something and she will try it. You will not always be
in control of what she has access to. She will be old enough one day to
walk to the store by herself and spend her money on something and that might
be candy. So you can prevent her from having sweets now, if that's what
you want to do, but there will be a day she tries them for herself.
It may or may not help you to ask yourself whether you feel it's right to
deny someone a thing they're interested in. You might feel it's your duty
to protect her from foods you feel are not healthy. There will be a point,
though where she will be making food choices for herself . My feeling was
always that if Dylan had a lot of freedom to make choices he would learn to
make wise choices. I believed it was better to have that learning
experience at home, with people who loved him and who could give him help
and advice than for him to be suddenly making choices for himself for the
first time when he was out on his own.
If you are an example of healthy food choices yourself and if your daughter
has plenty of free access to healthy foods it's likely she will find a
balance that is near your own. But it's possible she will at first choose a
lot of sweets if they are new and that might last longer than makes you
comfortable. There is the possibility that she will always like sweets to a
degree you don't understand or share yourself.
I do like sweets and I bake. I don't eat commercially prepared cake mixes
or cookies but I make fudge and cake and cookies and sweet breads and candy
and pies. I usually make something sweet every week. I think chocolate
cake or nutmeg cookies are two of the finest breakfast choices available.
<g>
But my kid is not much of a sweet eater. I find that strange because my
siblings are sweet eaters and David (dh) and his sibs are sweet eaters and I
thought Dylan had all the right genetics to make him a sweet eater. It may
be that he just does not care a great deal about sweets or it may be that
having sweets available to him if he wanted them let him developed a
psychology that doesn't prize some food items above others. I have heard
many similar stories from unschoolers.
Deb Lewis
house? I make apples with a RAW almond butter honey
dip etc? BUt to not keep cake and cookies, even if
she asks for them?***
I don't think it's wrong but it might be problematic.
Some people are not sweet eaters and it would be natural for them to have
few if any sweets in the house.
Some people are not meat eaters and so it would be natural for them to have
little or no meat on hand.
When our kids are little we eat the way we eat and don't necessarily think
about introducing to them things we would not normally keep on hand.
When our kids are older and especially old enough to ask questions about
food and be curious about what they see other people eating then I think
that's our cue to help them explore. The way we do when our little babies
first show an interest in what we're eating; we offer them little tastes of
what we have.
In a case where parents have strong feelings about a food like sweets and a
child is showing interest in those things (because she's seen other people
eat them or has been at a house where those things are abundant) then I
think it's important to address the child's need to explore. I don't think
that means filling the house with every possible sweet treat, but instead,
going about helping her try the thing she's asking about.
I think it's likely that when we deny a thing a child is interested in, it
makes that thing seem more important - it creates more of a desire for that
thing.
So, what if your child loves sweets? What if she tries them and wants to
eat a lot of sweets? Can you handle that? Could you find a way to be ok
with that, maybe making homemade things with ingredients you feel better
about?
Your child is going to try sweets. She will be at a friends house someday
and they will offer something and she will try it. You will not always be
in control of what she has access to. She will be old enough one day to
walk to the store by herself and spend her money on something and that might
be candy. So you can prevent her from having sweets now, if that's what
you want to do, but there will be a day she tries them for herself.
It may or may not help you to ask yourself whether you feel it's right to
deny someone a thing they're interested in. You might feel it's your duty
to protect her from foods you feel are not healthy. There will be a point,
though where she will be making food choices for herself . My feeling was
always that if Dylan had a lot of freedom to make choices he would learn to
make wise choices. I believed it was better to have that learning
experience at home, with people who loved him and who could give him help
and advice than for him to be suddenly making choices for himself for the
first time when he was out on his own.
If you are an example of healthy food choices yourself and if your daughter
has plenty of free access to healthy foods it's likely she will find a
balance that is near your own. But it's possible she will at first choose a
lot of sweets if they are new and that might last longer than makes you
comfortable. There is the possibility that she will always like sweets to a
degree you don't understand or share yourself.
I do like sweets and I bake. I don't eat commercially prepared cake mixes
or cookies but I make fudge and cake and cookies and sweet breads and candy
and pies. I usually make something sweet every week. I think chocolate
cake or nutmeg cookies are two of the finest breakfast choices available.
<g>
But my kid is not much of a sweet eater. I find that strange because my
siblings are sweet eaters and David (dh) and his sibs are sweet eaters and I
thought Dylan had all the right genetics to make him a sweet eater. It may
be that he just does not care a great deal about sweets or it may be that
having sweets available to him if he wanted them let him developed a
psychology that doesn't prize some food items above others. I have heard
many similar stories from unschoolers.
Deb Lewis
Ariannah Armstrong
Deb Lewis wrote:
purposely make a point of it, then it's not?
I'm trying to get a clear definition of what in general would be
perceived as "true unschooling". I've spent my whole life thinking
outside the box (me and common culturally accepted thought are aliens in
many ways), and am not stopping now.
Best,
Ariannah in Nova Scotia (a different poster than Adriana :))
--
"May we all have a vision now and then
Of a world where every neighbour is a friend"
Abba "Happy New Year" 1980
Personal Blog: http://ec.lecti.ca
>So if it already occurs naturally in the home, then it's ok, but if we
> Some people are not sweet eaters and it would be natural for them to have
> few if any sweets in the house.
> Some people are not meat eaters and so it would be natural for them to have
> little or no meat on hand.
purposely make a point of it, then it's not?
I'm trying to get a clear definition of what in general would be
perceived as "true unschooling". I've spent my whole life thinking
outside the box (me and common culturally accepted thought are aliens in
many ways), and am not stopping now.
Best,
Ariannah in Nova Scotia (a different poster than Adriana :))
--
"May we all have a vision now and then
Of a world where every neighbour is a friend"
Abba "Happy New Year" 1980
Personal Blog: http://ec.lecti.ca
Joyce Fetteroll
On Jan 8, 2007, at 2:32 PM, Ariannah Armstrong wrote:
That's at the heart of unschooling. It isn't about how much candy to
keep in the house. It's about responding to our kids needs to explore
the world in freedom.
What would you want to happen if you had a desire? Would you want
your husband to second guess you and decide you didn't need to have
it around because you obviously weren't competent to make the right,
eg, his, choice?
There's been way way too much focus on sweets in the discussion and
people are losing sight of the objective which is to help our kids
explore the world. If they'd like a bag of Oreos, buy them joyfully
and dunk them in milk and twist them apart and crumble them onto ice
cream. Buy various kinds and do a taste test.
(And that exploration will exist in a life that has nutrition
information swirling around in it. Not doom and gloom information
that's trotted out every time kids turn towards something you fear.
But real, useful information they can draw on to help them make
decisions.)
Live life. An Oreo isn't going to kill anyone. A whole bag of Oreos
isn't going to kill anyone. But a desire left unexplored can become a
burning hole that just gets bigger and bigger until it grows into a
huge monster that's far huger than what the child is being protected
from.
A bag of Oreos can just be a blip in life. (Or several periodic
blips :-) But a blockade before the Oreos turns them into something
coveted and desired.
Joyce
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> I'm trying to get a clear definition of what in general would beWhat do your kids want?
> perceived as "true unschooling".
That's at the heart of unschooling. It isn't about how much candy to
keep in the house. It's about responding to our kids needs to explore
the world in freedom.
What would you want to happen if you had a desire? Would you want
your husband to second guess you and decide you didn't need to have
it around because you obviously weren't competent to make the right,
eg, his, choice?
There's been way way too much focus on sweets in the discussion and
people are losing sight of the objective which is to help our kids
explore the world. If they'd like a bag of Oreos, buy them joyfully
and dunk them in milk and twist them apart and crumble them onto ice
cream. Buy various kinds and do a taste test.
(And that exploration will exist in a life that has nutrition
information swirling around in it. Not doom and gloom information
that's trotted out every time kids turn towards something you fear.
But real, useful information they can draw on to help them make
decisions.)
Live life. An Oreo isn't going to kill anyone. A whole bag of Oreos
isn't going to kill anyone. But a desire left unexplored can become a
burning hole that just gets bigger and bigger until it grows into a
huge monster that's far huger than what the child is being protected
from.
A bag of Oreos can just be a blip in life. (Or several periodic
blips :-) But a blockade before the Oreos turns them into something
coveted and desired.
Joyce
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Ariannah Armstrong
Ok, great, we are on the same page. This is the same things I'd been
reading about unschooling for years.
Best,
Ariannah
Joyce Fetteroll wrote:
"May we all have a vision now and then
Of a world where every neighbour is a friend"
Abba "Happy New Year" 1980
Personal Blog: http://ec.lecti.ca
reading about unschooling for years.
Best,
Ariannah
Joyce Fetteroll wrote:
> On Jan 8, 2007, at 2:32 PM, Ariannah Armstrong wrote:--
>
>> I'm trying to get a clear definition of what in general would be
>> perceived as "true unschooling".
>
> What do your kids want?
>
> That's at the heart of unschooling. It isn't about how much candy to
> keep in the house. It's about responding to our kids needs to explore
> the world in freedom.
>
> What would you want to happen if you had a desire? Would you want
> your husband to second guess you and decide you didn't need to have
> it around because you obviously weren't competent to make the right,
> eg, his, choice?
>
> There's been way way too much focus on sweets in the discussion and
> people are losing sight of the objective which is to help our kids
> explore the world. If they'd like a bag of Oreos, buy them joyfully
> and dunk them in milk and twist them apart and crumble them onto ice
> cream. Buy various kinds and do a taste test.
>
> (And that exploration will exist in a life that has nutrition
> information swirling around in it. Not doom and gloom information
> that's trotted out every time kids turn towards something you fear.
> But real, useful information they can draw on to help them make
> decisions.)
>
> Live life. An Oreo isn't going to kill anyone. A whole bag of Oreos
> isn't going to kill anyone. But a desire left unexplored can become a
> burning hole that just gets bigger and bigger until it grows into a
> huge monster that's far huger than what the child is being protected
> from.
>
> A bag of Oreos can just be a blip in life. (Or several periodic
> blips :-) But a blockade before the Oreos turns them into something
> coveted and desired.
>
> Joyce
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
>
>
>
> Yahoo! Groups Links
>
>
>
"May we all have a vision now and then
Of a world where every neighbour is a friend"
Abba "Happy New Year" 1980
Personal Blog: http://ec.lecti.ca
Vickisue Gray
I just got back from a short trip and found the house was out of food. So today I loaded up my son (9) and took him to Publix. He asked if he could bring his book in. (He's currently reading the fourth Halo book and it's too good to put down.) I told him sure if he wants, but we were here to buy his food, so he might be too busy shopping for reading. The look he gave me was so precious!
So I grabbed a cart and started asking if he liked this? or that? and so on. As we went through the prepared food section, as I was looking at hummus, I noticed the cart slowly
moving away. So I watched. The cart sat in front of the fresh cheesecake and strawberry pies with a very bright eyed (hungry) young man looking hopeful at me. I told him, "Of course you may have it if you'd like it." He asked me if we had enough money. I told him it was fine. Buy whatever you like today don't worry about the price. He never read his book and here is a quick list of his purchases (he bought enough for everyone, too!)
Assorted dounuts
egg drop soup
hot & sour soup
milk
Orange juice
grapes
bananas
cream of mushroom soup
fruit loops
cherry pie
fried chicken
SUSHI <need to repeat> SUSHI
ground beef for tacos
Top sirloin
cheesecake
strawberry pie with whipped cream
He is very full now and very happy, lol, filled up on the sushi and hasn't touch a sweet yet.
I love unschooling and the total concept behind it.
Vicki
__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
So I grabbed a cart and started asking if he liked this? or that? and so on. As we went through the prepared food section, as I was looking at hummus, I noticed the cart slowly
moving away. So I watched. The cart sat in front of the fresh cheesecake and strawberry pies with a very bright eyed (hungry) young man looking hopeful at me. I told him, "Of course you may have it if you'd like it." He asked me if we had enough money. I told him it was fine. Buy whatever you like today don't worry about the price. He never read his book and here is a quick list of his purchases (he bought enough for everyone, too!)
Assorted dounuts
egg drop soup
hot & sour soup
milk
Orange juice
grapes
bananas
cream of mushroom soup
fruit loops
cherry pie
fried chicken
SUSHI <need to repeat> SUSHI
ground beef for tacos
Top sirloin
cheesecake
strawberry pie with whipped cream
He is very full now and very happy, lol, filled up on the sushi and hasn't touch a sweet yet.
I love unschooling and the total concept behind it.
Vicki
__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around
http://mail.yahoo.com
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Ariannah Armstrong
Joyce Fetteroll wrote:
and her brushing teeth - I disclaimer simply because in the past when no
distinction has been made, I've been mixed up with people with another
similar name - with less than desirable results). I am way cool with
unschooling philosophy and raising kids in freedom - I'm the one who
talked about the fact that this year our kids wanted to decorate cookie
houses and I spent $20 on all the makings for it, and joined in the
making thereof with them.
We meet all our kids wants and their needs. We had the good fortune to
feed our children with a plethora of healthy natural food - we had a
mini garden as well as a neighbour who shared - before they really were
introduced to sugar. So they had a foundation there. I didn't think
of it as "restrictive" because our family just naturally happened to be
doing what we were doing. It didn't occur to us that kids were
supposedly "missing out" by us not having it.
When it happened, we didn't make a big deal out of it, in fact we made
birthday cakes and stuff, and everything. They know for themselves the
difference they feel. That's why they never ask for it much. When they
do, I'll bake cookies or something, or get them a candy. We're
uncomfortable with the word "restricting" being applied to anything we
don't particularly go for with gusto. I have a lot of baggage with that
word. They still like the taste of items made with sugar, and some
processed meals, but they always end up going for the things they love
best, which is what they've been exposed to.
Is there room for different lifestyles, and what people make more or
less abundant in their home that may differ from another's or less
mainstream, and still be able to call it unschooling? Can people have
personal reasons for doing things a certain way, and still call it
unschooling? For instance, can people who are vegetarian or vegan for
personal, environmental or ethical reasons still call themselves
"unschoolers?" Can Jewish people be unschoolers? ....
That's something I'm a little timid about. I just want to know if all
"types" are card-carrying unschoolers according to the group here. :)
I ask this pleasantly, and positively, as I'm eager to learn more.
Best,
Ariannah in Nova Scotia
--
"May we all have a vision now and then
Of a world where every neighbour is a friend"
Abba "Happy New Year" 1980
Personal Blog: http://ec.lecti.ca
> On Jan 8, 2007, at 2:32 PM, Ariannah Armstrong wrote:(Just so you know, I am not Adriana who had been posting about her son
>
>> I'm trying to get a clear definition of what in general would be
>> perceived as "true unschooling".
>
> What do your kids want?
and her brushing teeth - I disclaimer simply because in the past when no
distinction has been made, I've been mixed up with people with another
similar name - with less than desirable results). I am way cool with
unschooling philosophy and raising kids in freedom - I'm the one who
talked about the fact that this year our kids wanted to decorate cookie
houses and I spent $20 on all the makings for it, and joined in the
making thereof with them.
We meet all our kids wants and their needs. We had the good fortune to
feed our children with a plethora of healthy natural food - we had a
mini garden as well as a neighbour who shared - before they really were
introduced to sugar. So they had a foundation there. I didn't think
of it as "restrictive" because our family just naturally happened to be
doing what we were doing. It didn't occur to us that kids were
supposedly "missing out" by us not having it.
When it happened, we didn't make a big deal out of it, in fact we made
birthday cakes and stuff, and everything. They know for themselves the
difference they feel. That's why they never ask for it much. When they
do, I'll bake cookies or something, or get them a candy. We're
uncomfortable with the word "restricting" being applied to anything we
don't particularly go for with gusto. I have a lot of baggage with that
word. They still like the taste of items made with sugar, and some
processed meals, but they always end up going for the things they love
best, which is what they've been exposed to.
Is there room for different lifestyles, and what people make more or
less abundant in their home that may differ from another's or less
mainstream, and still be able to call it unschooling? Can people have
personal reasons for doing things a certain way, and still call it
unschooling? For instance, can people who are vegetarian or vegan for
personal, environmental or ethical reasons still call themselves
"unschoolers?" Can Jewish people be unschoolers? ....
That's something I'm a little timid about. I just want to know if all
"types" are card-carrying unschoolers according to the group here. :)
I ask this pleasantly, and positively, as I'm eager to learn more.
Best,
Ariannah in Nova Scotia
--
"May we all have a vision now and then
Of a world where every neighbour is a friend"
Abba "Happy New Year" 1980
Personal Blog: http://ec.lecti.ca
plaidpanties666
--- In [email protected], Meridith Richardson
<ruttegar@...> wrote:
communication with our kids. If you don't care about that, that's
fine, but it isn't unschooling.
---Meredith (Mo 5, Ray 13)
<ruttegar@...> wrote:
>Its not about right or wrong. Its about fostering trust and open
> Do you believe it is wrong to NOT keep sweets in the
> house?
communication with our kids. If you don't care about that, that's
fine, but it isn't unschooling.
---Meredith (Mo 5, Ray 13)
kristenhendricks55
"He lived to 4 3/4yo on breastmilk,"...
Kind of OT here, but I am curious...
I don't know if you nurse, or pump, but I am sure he understands
where the milk comes from.
I have a three month old and when I nurse him my daughter has asked
questions because we've had a few situations where she has grabbed
or pinched someone elses breast (another mom usually) not meaning
anything by it, but I have told her no we don't touch other people
there. So in turn I think she has come to understand that we don't
touch other peoples private areas. Follow me so far? lol
Okay so what I'm trying to get at... when I am breastfeeding she
will give me odd looks like she is wondering "why it's a private
place for others but its okay for me to lift my shirt and someone
else touches me there".
Then if I ask her what she is thinking, she will say "nothing".
How does your son react to it, or what do you say to him? It's hard
for me to explain that to a three year old, so I'm curious how you
would explain it to her?
I don't want to tell her the wrong thing and have her thinking it's
something gross or something you shouldn't be doing. It seems like
no matter how I put it will be the wrong thing to say.
It's hard enough to nurse at ALL these days with the way people
treat you in public... let alone an older child where people think
you're being "gross" or inapropriate. I just don't want my daughter
to end up thinking the wrong thing about nursing.
Any advice would be appreciated :)
--- In [email protected], Genevieve Labonte
<fihz@...> wrote:
Kind of OT here, but I am curious...
I don't know if you nurse, or pump, but I am sure he understands
where the milk comes from.
I have a three month old and when I nurse him my daughter has asked
questions because we've had a few situations where she has grabbed
or pinched someone elses breast (another mom usually) not meaning
anything by it, but I have told her no we don't touch other people
there. So in turn I think she has come to understand that we don't
touch other peoples private areas. Follow me so far? lol
Okay so what I'm trying to get at... when I am breastfeeding she
will give me odd looks like she is wondering "why it's a private
place for others but its okay for me to lift my shirt and someone
else touches me there".
Then if I ask her what she is thinking, she will say "nothing".
How does your son react to it, or what do you say to him? It's hard
for me to explain that to a three year old, so I'm curious how you
would explain it to her?
I don't want to tell her the wrong thing and have her thinking it's
something gross or something you shouldn't be doing. It seems like
no matter how I put it will be the wrong thing to say.
It's hard enough to nurse at ALL these days with the way people
treat you in public... let alone an older child where people think
you're being "gross" or inapropriate. I just don't want my daughter
to end up thinking the wrong thing about nursing.
Any advice would be appreciated :)
--- In [email protected], Genevieve Labonte
<fihz@...> wrote:
>you
> I rarely post here, mostly read messages ;-) But, wanted to tell
> what we do.made
>
> I have a 5 yo. that *never* liked fruit. I think the only fruit he
> tasted as a fruit is a banana. Other than that, even the purées I
> as a baby he gaged on or showed distate to. Veggies? Well,except
> mashed potatoes and corn-from-a-can, none other.rice,
>
> He lived to 4 3/4yo on breastmilk, cheerios, mashed potates, white
> ice cream, cheese, real apple juice and not much else I can thinkof.
> He's never been pressured to taste, although I will ask him if hewants
> to when I make something new, and as of the last month maybe, hestarted
> answering " What does it taste like?". I give him the most honestsometimes
> answer I have (with brother's sometimes chiming in) and he
> chooses to try.I keep
>
> He started eating commercial fruit purées lately and loves those.
> a stash that I know he likes in arms reach. And also, some puréedsoups
> are good. Not everyone and not everytime. But, he started askingfor
> some of these soups, so he likes them, I guess ;-)it, and
>
> So, don't pressure it, don't hide it, be honest about what's in
> find new meals to try. Be patient, loving and open-minded aboutthe
> foods they choose. Have them help making a meal. Make the tomatosauce
> for the pizza ;-) Add pineapple. Make yours special, add roastedthem
> onions, olives, and offer them to take theirs and yours... Show
> how veggies are part of the foods we eat and not some big-bad foodwe
> HAVE TO eat.only
>
> Genevieve, mom to 4 boys...
>
>
>
>
> I have let it go for years and they still do NOT choose healthy
> food over sugary/salty stuff. I find if I do not at least insist
> they eat their protein and carbs at meal times (pretty much the
> things they will eat) they won't eat anything and go right todesert.
> My dd is obsessed/addicted to sweets. How do I get out of thiseat
> cycle? Are you SURE that if I let them choose what they want to
> that they will eventually pick healthy things? How long will thiss=97359714/grpId=12789513/grpspId=1705081972/
> take? And how do I get my son to try fruits and veggies etc.?? He
> will not even put them in his mouth!
> .
>
> <http://geo.yahoo.com/serv?
> msgId=20442/stime=1168270130/nc1=4025370/nc2=3848527/nc3=3>
>
>
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
christymccranie
I'm with you with one addition for my 4. They don't have to eat what I give them at a meal I
prepare, but going and getting chips or candy isn't an option. If they're hungry they'll find
something on the plate that's worth eating. We say - 'take one bite of everything then eat
what you like.' I too will warn them if there is something we're trying that's new that might
not go over - I need them to trust me and not feel tricked! But I don't agree that letting
them eat what they want when they want is a healthy way to go - I didn't care about my
diet until I was in my 30's! But I don't force stuff they hate either. One of mine hates fruit
too and I'm encouraged from this last post that maybe he'll come around. We do 'juice
plus' to try and fill in the many gaps in our diet but I think no boundries in this area is as
dangerous as too many. Middle ground works for us.
prepare, but going and getting chips or candy isn't an option. If they're hungry they'll find
something on the plate that's worth eating. We say - 'take one bite of everything then eat
what you like.' I too will warn them if there is something we're trying that's new that might
not go over - I need them to trust me and not feel tricked! But I don't agree that letting
them eat what they want when they want is a healthy way to go - I didn't care about my
diet until I was in my 30's! But I don't force stuff they hate either. One of mine hates fruit
too and I'm encouraged from this last post that maybe he'll come around. We do 'juice
plus' to try and fill in the many gaps in our diet but I think no boundries in this area is as
dangerous as too many. Middle ground works for us.
--- In [email protected], Genevieve Labonte <fihz@...> wrote:
>
> I rarely post here, mostly read messages ;-) But, wanted to tell you
> what we do.
>
> I have a 5 yo. that *never* liked fruit. I think the only fruit he
> tasted as a fruit is a banana. Other than that, even the purées I made
> as a baby he gaged on or showed distate to. Veggies? Well, except
> mashed potatoes and corn-from-a-can, none other.
>
> He lived to 4 3/4yo on breastmilk, cheerios, mashed potates, white rice,
> ice cream, cheese, real apple juice and not much else I can think of.
> He's never been pressured to taste, although I will ask him if he wants
> to when I make something new, and as of the last month maybe, he started
> answering " What does it taste like?". I give him the most honest
> answer I have (with brother's sometimes chiming in) and he sometimes
> chooses to try.
>
> He started eating commercial fruit purées lately and loves those. I keep
> a stash that I know he likes in arms reach. And also, some puréed soups
> are good. Not everyone and not everytime. But, he started asking for
> some of these soups, so he likes them, I guess ;-)
>
> So, don't pressure it, don't hide it, be honest about what's in it, and
> find new meals to try. Be patient, loving and open-minded about the
> foods they choose. Have them help making a meal. Make the tomato sauce
> for the pizza ;-) Add pineapple. Make yours special, add roasted
> onions, olives, and offer them to take theirs and yours... Show them
> how veggies are part of the foods we eat and not some big-bad food we
> HAVE TO eat.
>
> Genevieve, mom to 4 boys...
>
>
>
>
> I have let it go for years and they still do NOT choose healthy
> food over sugary/salty stuff. I find if I do not at least insist
> they eat their protein and carbs at meal times (pretty much the only
> things they will eat) they won't eat anything and go right to desert.
> My dd is obsessed/addicted to sweets. How do I get out of this
> cycle? Are you SURE that if I let them choose what they want to eat
> that they will eventually pick healthy things? How long will this
> take? And how do I get my son to try fruits and veggies etc.?? He
> will not even put them in his mouth!
> .
>
> <http://geo.yahoo.com/serv?s=97359714/grpId=12789513/grpspId=1705081972/
> msgId=20442/stime=1168270130/nc1=4025370/nc2=3848527/nc3=3>
>
>
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
Ren Allen
~~Okay so what I'm trying to get at... when I am breastfeeding she
will give me odd looks like she is wondering "why it's a private
place for others but its okay for me to lift my shirt and someone
else touches me there".~~
She sees right through the falseness of what you've told her. Many
children are still nursing at that age, why SHOULDN'T she want to
touch your breast out of curiosity? Don't turn it into anything other
than the innocent curiosity of a young child. Heck, I'd let her try
nursing if she wanted to. There is nothing wrong with that!!
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
will give me odd looks like she is wondering "why it's a private
place for others but its okay for me to lift my shirt and someone
else touches me there".~~
She sees right through the falseness of what you've told her. Many
children are still nursing at that age, why SHOULDN'T she want to
touch your breast out of curiosity? Don't turn it into anything other
than the innocent curiosity of a young child. Heck, I'd let her try
nursing if she wanted to. There is nothing wrong with that!!
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
kristenhendricks55
You would let a 3 year old try nursing after she had not been nursing
for 2 years?
I'm sorry but that honestly seems disgusting to me and I feel it would
be very inapropriate. Because it wouldnt be for her sole nutrition, it
would be for her curiosity. Thats not right.-
-- In [email protected], "Ren Allen"
<starsuncloud@...> wrote:
for 2 years?
I'm sorry but that honestly seems disgusting to me and I feel it would
be very inapropriate. Because it wouldnt be for her sole nutrition, it
would be for her curiosity. Thats not right.-
-- In [email protected], "Ren Allen"
<starsuncloud@...> wrote:
>
> ~~Okay so what I'm trying to get at... when I am breastfeeding she
> will give me odd looks like she is wondering "why it's a private
> place for others but its okay for me to lift my shirt and someone
> else touches me there".~~
>
> She sees right through the falseness of what you've told her. Many
> children are still nursing at that age, why SHOULDN'T she want to
> touch your breast out of curiosity? Don't turn it into anything other
> than the innocent curiosity of a young child. Heck, I'd let her try
> nursing if she wanted to. There is nothing wrong with that!!
>
> Ren
> learninginfreedom.com
>
[email protected]
In a message dated 1/9/2007 12:00:21 A.M. Eastern Standard Time,
starsuncloud@... writes:
Don't turn it into anything other
than the innocent curiosity of a young child. Heck, I'd let her try
nursing if she wanted to. There is nothing wrong with that!!
amen! after my first son had been weaned for quite some time we were
carjacked and he went back to nursing (almost instantly, as in *when we were filling
out the police report*) for 2 weeks. it was TRULY a blessing for him;
probably the only way he could feel true comfort during such a scary time.
Adriana
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
starsuncloud@... writes:
Don't turn it into anything other
than the innocent curiosity of a young child. Heck, I'd let her try
nursing if she wanted to. There is nothing wrong with that!!
amen! after my first son had been weaned for quite some time we were
carjacked and he went back to nursing (almost instantly, as in *when we were filling
out the police report*) for 2 weeks. it was TRULY a blessing for him;
probably the only way he could feel true comfort during such a scary time.
Adriana
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Joanne
--- In [email protected], "christymccranie"
<christymccranie@...> wrote:
Suppose they want something else?
Just curious....
~~*Joanne*~~
http://anunschoolinglife.blogspot.com/
<christymccranie@...> wrote:
>>>>>We say - 'take one bite of everything then eat what you like.>>>>Why the one bite? And what happens if they don't want to take one bite?
Suppose they want something else?
Just curious....
~~*Joanne*~~
http://anunschoolinglife.blogspot.com/
[email protected]
In a message dated 1/9/2007 12:14:22 A.M. Eastern Standard Time,
kristenhendricks55@... writes:
You would let a 3 year old try nursing after she had not been nursing
for 2 years?
I'm sorry but that honestly seems disgusting to me and I feel it would
be very inapropriate. Because it wouldnt be for her sole nutrition, it
would be for her curiosity. Thats not right.-
THAT IS SOOOO SAD!!!!!!! Nursing isn't just for nutrition!!! It is for
comfort, emotional health, fun, boredom, curiosity; you name the problem and
nursing will help it! It is the most natural, beautiful thing on earth!!!!
Adriana
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
kristenhendricks55@... writes:
You would let a 3 year old try nursing after she had not been nursing
for 2 years?
I'm sorry but that honestly seems disgusting to me and I feel it would
be very inapropriate. Because it wouldnt be for her sole nutrition, it
would be for her curiosity. Thats not right.-
THAT IS SOOOO SAD!!!!!!! Nursing isn't just for nutrition!!! It is for
comfort, emotional health, fun, boredom, curiosity; you name the problem and
nursing will help it! It is the most natural, beautiful thing on earth!!!!
Adriana
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Ren Allen
~~I'm sorry but that honestly seems disgusting to me and I feel it would
be very inapropriate.~~
And your child has most likely picked up on your attitudes and will
not be perfectly honest about her desire to nurse (IF there is one) or
her curiosity about breasts.
It's too bad that you see something natural and biological as
"disgusting". YOu might want to examine those attitudes so you don't
close the door of learning in your childs face.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
be very inapropriate.~~
And your child has most likely picked up on your attitudes and will
not be perfectly honest about her desire to nurse (IF there is one) or
her curiosity about breasts.
It's too bad that you see something natural and biological as
"disgusting". YOu might want to examine those attitudes so you don't
close the door of learning in your childs face.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
Ren Allen
~~>>We say - 'take one bite of everything then eat what you like.>>>~~
My Mom did that whole "no thank you bite" crap.
I'm sure glad to be an adult now, so I can choose what to put in my
mouth. Why make kids wait until their grown to decide what goes into
their bodies? Can you imagine if your dh made you eat foods you didn't
like. One bite is every bit as coercive as two.
I know from experience that kids are WAY more likely to try new foods
when there's no pressure. They treat food like a scientist would.
I was chopping cilantro tonight for salsa and Sierra stuck a piece in
her mouth. "It doesn't taste like anything by itself" she says. I ask
her if she ground it up good enough with her teeth because it's pretty
strong, so she tried it again and ended up spitting it out.:)
She loved it in the salsa though.
All of my children will try weird foods at least once, out of
curiosity usually. There is no pressure. If they don't ever eat
certain foods will it harm them? Of course not.
And what a person doesn't like one year, they may like the next.
Tastes change drastically over time. Trevor (17) even likes sushi now
(he's got pretty American tastes most of the time).
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
My Mom did that whole "no thank you bite" crap.
I'm sure glad to be an adult now, so I can choose what to put in my
mouth. Why make kids wait until their grown to decide what goes into
their bodies? Can you imagine if your dh made you eat foods you didn't
like. One bite is every bit as coercive as two.
I know from experience that kids are WAY more likely to try new foods
when there's no pressure. They treat food like a scientist would.
I was chopping cilantro tonight for salsa and Sierra stuck a piece in
her mouth. "It doesn't taste like anything by itself" she says. I ask
her if she ground it up good enough with her teeth because it's pretty
strong, so she tried it again and ended up spitting it out.:)
She loved it in the salsa though.
All of my children will try weird foods at least once, out of
curiosity usually. There is no pressure. If they don't ever eat
certain foods will it harm them? Of course not.
And what a person doesn't like one year, they may like the next.
Tastes change drastically over time. Trevor (17) even likes sushi now
(he's got pretty American tastes most of the time).
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
kristenhendricks55
Why the one bite? And what happens if they don't want to take one
bite?
Suppose they want something else?
Not my original post, but I just wanted to give an opinion.
When my dd makes me one of her playdoh "meals" or cooks me something
in her pretend kitchen I always sit down and pretend to eat it with
her. I figure she spend alot of time and effort making it, and I
respect that.
Respect is a big thing in our house. And we do the same thing. All I
ask of my kids is to try it. I spent time and effort making that
meal and all I expect in return is that you try it.
I'm trying to live my life as a partner with my kids, not as a
dictator. I still tell them to try things because they tell me to
try what they made. Thats fair and respectful to me.
You know that they say... "Give a little, get a little." :)
--- In [email protected], "Joanne"
<billyandjoanne@...> wrote:
bite?
Suppose they want something else?
Not my original post, but I just wanted to give an opinion.
When my dd makes me one of her playdoh "meals" or cooks me something
in her pretend kitchen I always sit down and pretend to eat it with
her. I figure she spend alot of time and effort making it, and I
respect that.
Respect is a big thing in our house. And we do the same thing. All I
ask of my kids is to try it. I spent time and effort making that
meal and all I expect in return is that you try it.
I'm trying to live my life as a partner with my kids, not as a
dictator. I still tell them to try things because they tell me to
try what they made. Thats fair and respectful to me.
You know that they say... "Give a little, get a little." :)
--- In [email protected], "Joanne"
<billyandjoanne@...> wrote:
>like.>>>>
> --- In [email protected], "christymccranie"
> <christymccranie@> wrote:
> >>>>>We say - 'take one bite of everything then eat what you
>bite?
> Why the one bite? And what happens if they don't want to take one
> Suppose they want something else?
>
> Just curious....
>
>
> ~~*Joanne*~~
> http://anunschoolinglife.blogspot.com/
>
kristenhendricks55
"her desire to nurse "
She is three years old and that just isn't going to happen. Desire
or no desire...
There are some thing I just cannot sway on, and thats one of them.
Just because a child still desires to breastfeed at that age doesn't
mean its right. Whats right for someone isnt right for another. And
its just not right for our family. :)
--- In [email protected], "Ren Allen"
<starsuncloud@...> wrote:
She is three years old and that just isn't going to happen. Desire
or no desire...
There are some thing I just cannot sway on, and thats one of them.
Just because a child still desires to breastfeed at that age doesn't
mean its right. Whats right for someone isnt right for another. And
its just not right for our family. :)
--- In [email protected], "Ren Allen"
<starsuncloud@...> wrote:
>would
> ~~I'm sorry but that honestly seems disgusting to me and I feel it
> be very inapropriate.~~one) or
>
> And your child has most likely picked up on your attitudes and will
> not be perfectly honest about her desire to nurse (IF there is
> her curiosity about breasts.don't
>
> It's too bad that you see something natural and biological as
> "disgusting". YOu might want to examine those attitudes so you
> close the door of learning in your childs face.
>
> Ren
> learninginfreedom.com
>
Deb Lewis
***You would let a 3 year old try nursing after she had not been nursing
for 2 years?***
It wasn't two years, but I have a return to nursing story. Dylan nursed
until he was almost four. Later that year he got his first cold and wanted
to nurse again. My milk came back and he was able to nurse and be
comforted during the first illness of his young life. He didn't continue to
nurse after that but I was glad I could comfort him.
***I'm sorry but that honestly seems disgusting to me and I feel it would
be very inapropriate. Because it wouldnt be for her sole nutrition, it
would be for her curiosity. Thats not right.-***
A momma's breast is for her baby. It's appropriate and right for many
people all over the world. Lots and lots of kids are still nursing at
three years old and I know some who nursed until six or seven.
Deb Lewis
for 2 years?***
It wasn't two years, but I have a return to nursing story. Dylan nursed
until he was almost four. Later that year he got his first cold and wanted
to nurse again. My milk came back and he was able to nurse and be
comforted during the first illness of his young life. He didn't continue to
nurse after that but I was glad I could comfort him.
***I'm sorry but that honestly seems disgusting to me and I feel it would
be very inapropriate. Because it wouldnt be for her sole nutrition, it
would be for her curiosity. Thats not right.-***
A momma's breast is for her baby. It's appropriate and right for many
people all over the world. Lots and lots of kids are still nursing at
three years old and I know some who nursed until six or seven.
Deb Lewis
[email protected]
"kristenhendricks55" <kristenhendricks55@...> wrote:
Finally tandem-nursing! ;) (Which I didn't want to do back then.)
Let's see, Betty does this 4 years, and Jenny 2 years after really nursing... It comes up occasionally, like now that my sister has a baby and is nursing her.
Simply pulling up my shirt and touching is something they like to do, too. And I just tell them whether it's okay for me at the moment, or not.
I frankly don't know if I would do it like this with a boy, don't have one so far ;), but I'm actually happy that they as future women like and enjoy breasts! And are looking forward to having some themselves!
Naka, Betty (6), Jenny (4)
**************************************************************************
--
Der GMX SmartSurfer hilft bis zu 70% Ihrer Onlinekosten zu sparen!
Ideal für Modem und ISDN: http://www.gmx.net/de/go/smartsurfer
> You would let a 3 year old try nursing after she had not been nursingMy daughters, 6 and 4 yrs old, sometimes do that. Out of curiosity. They say they want to see whether there's still milk inside. It's maybe a second, and they like to do it together.
> for 2 years?
>
> I'm sorry but that honestly seems disgusting to me and I feel it would
> be very inapropriate. Because it wouldnt be for her sole nutrition, it
> would be for her curiosity. Thats not right.
Finally tandem-nursing! ;) (Which I didn't want to do back then.)
Let's see, Betty does this 4 years, and Jenny 2 years after really nursing... It comes up occasionally, like now that my sister has a baby and is nursing her.
Simply pulling up my shirt and touching is something they like to do, too. And I just tell them whether it's okay for me at the moment, or not.
I frankly don't know if I would do it like this with a boy, don't have one so far ;), but I'm actually happy that they as future women like and enjoy breasts! And are looking forward to having some themselves!
Naka, Betty (6), Jenny (4)
**************************************************************************
--
Der GMX SmartSurfer hilft bis zu 70% Ihrer Onlinekosten zu sparen!
Ideal für Modem und ISDN: http://www.gmx.net/de/go/smartsurfer
kristenhendricks55
I'm not even going to make a comment on the nursing till 6 or 7
years old or I am sure I will be ducking and running LOL
But I'm curious... how did your milk come back in? I just assumed
once it was gone, it was gone.
Then again I havent had much chance for mine to BE gone... so I
didnt know that it was a possiblilty it could come back in.
I nursed my three year old till about 18 months and at the time I
was pregnant and my milk just stayed in till dd #2 was born 4 mos
later. Then I nursed her until 11 months (my son was born when she
was 10 months old) and I'm now nursing him exclusively. It's been
about three and a half years of nursing, so I really havent had the
chance for it to dry up.
Is it just your hormones that stimulate it to come back in?
--- In [email protected], "Deb Lewis" <d.lewis@...>
wrote:
years old or I am sure I will be ducking and running LOL
But I'm curious... how did your milk come back in? I just assumed
once it was gone, it was gone.
Then again I havent had much chance for mine to BE gone... so I
didnt know that it was a possiblilty it could come back in.
I nursed my three year old till about 18 months and at the time I
was pregnant and my milk just stayed in till dd #2 was born 4 mos
later. Then I nursed her until 11 months (my son was born when she
was 10 months old) and I'm now nursing him exclusively. It's been
about three and a half years of nursing, so I really havent had the
chance for it to dry up.
Is it just your hormones that stimulate it to come back in?
--- In [email protected], "Deb Lewis" <d.lewis@...>
wrote:
>nursing
> ***You would let a 3 year old try nursing after she had not been
> for 2 years?***nursed
>
> It wasn't two years, but I have a return to nursing story. Dylan
> until he was almost four. Later that year he got his first coldand wanted
> to nurse again. My milk came back and he was able to nurse andbe
> comforted during the first illness of his young life. He didn'tcontinue to
> nurse after that but I was glad I could comfort him.it would
>
> ***I'm sorry but that honestly seems disgusting to me and I feel
> be very inapropriate. Because it wouldnt be for her solenutrition, it
> would be for her curiosity. Thats not right.-***many
>
> A momma's breast is for her baby. It's appropriate and right for
> people all over the world. Lots and lots of kids are stillnursing at
> three years old and I know some who nursed until six or seven.
>
> Deb Lewis
>
Schuyler
Children have more tastebuds than adults do. And they are in different
sections of the tongue. There are lots of things I couldn't stand the taste
of as a child that I quite like as an adult. Being made to clean my plate or
try one bite didn't make a difference, it just made me more reticent to try
things as an adult.
In looking for something to back up my tastebud count assertion I found this
study: http://tinyurl.com/ynyms9 which argues for gene TAS2R38 making bitter
flavors too intense. It reminds me of the They Might Be Giants song John
Lee Supertaster http://tinyurl.com/ymcqnx
Sometimes people do things for reasons you may not be aware of. Sometimes
things that are amazing to you may suck to others. Linnaea doesn't like
cheese or milk, she doesn't like the bitter taste, the lactic acid taste. As
a child I was allergic to milk, she may have some of that going on. I've
never really liked tomatoes and when I was travelling with two of my
professors to watch their children as they rode RAGBRAI and we were eating
spaghetti meals every night I ended up with a mouth full of mouth ulcers. I
probably had a low level allergy to the acid in tomatoes. Or not, maybe I
just didn't like them, but I felt like I was a failure for not liking them.
I felt like I was stupid and entrenched in my views for not liking them.
Like it was a choice. So, when you are telling your child that they must eat
something, they must try something, than you are telling them that you know
them better than they do, that there is no legitimate reason for their not
trying something and that even if it is something that they know they will
hate their knowledge is founded on nothing and they shouldn't trust
themselves. It is a powerful message.
Schuyler
www.waynforth.blogspot.com
sections of the tongue. There are lots of things I couldn't stand the taste
of as a child that I quite like as an adult. Being made to clean my plate or
try one bite didn't make a difference, it just made me more reticent to try
things as an adult.
In looking for something to back up my tastebud count assertion I found this
study: http://tinyurl.com/ynyms9 which argues for gene TAS2R38 making bitter
flavors too intense. It reminds me of the They Might Be Giants song John
Lee Supertaster http://tinyurl.com/ymcqnx
Sometimes people do things for reasons you may not be aware of. Sometimes
things that are amazing to you may suck to others. Linnaea doesn't like
cheese or milk, she doesn't like the bitter taste, the lactic acid taste. As
a child I was allergic to milk, she may have some of that going on. I've
never really liked tomatoes and when I was travelling with two of my
professors to watch their children as they rode RAGBRAI and we were eating
spaghetti meals every night I ended up with a mouth full of mouth ulcers. I
probably had a low level allergy to the acid in tomatoes. Or not, maybe I
just didn't like them, but I felt like I was a failure for not liking them.
I felt like I was stupid and entrenched in my views for not liking them.
Like it was a choice. So, when you are telling your child that they must eat
something, they must try something, than you are telling them that you know
them better than they do, that there is no legitimate reason for their not
trying something and that even if it is something that they know they will
hate their knowledge is founded on nothing and they shouldn't trust
themselves. It is a powerful message.
Schuyler
www.waynforth.blogspot.com
----- Original Message -----
From: "Ren Allen" <starsuncloud@...>
To: <[email protected]>
Sent: Tuesday, January 09, 2007 5:26 AM
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Re: encouraging healthy food...
> ~~>>We say - 'take one bite of everything then eat what you like.>>>~~
>
> My Mom did that whole "no thank you bite" crap.
> I'm sure glad to be an adult now, so I can choose what to put in my
> mouth. Why make kids wait until their grown to decide what goes into
> their bodies? Can you imagine if your dh made you eat foods you didn't
> like. One bite is every bit as coercive as two.
>
> I know from experience that kids are WAY more likely to try new foods
> when there's no pressure. They treat food like a scientist would.
>
> I was chopping cilantro tonight for salsa and Sierra stuck a piece in
> her mouth. "It doesn't taste like anything by itself" she says. I ask
> her if she ground it up good enough with her teeth because it's pretty
> strong, so she tried it again and ended up spitting it out.:)
>
> She loved it in the salsa though.
> All of my children will try weird foods at least once, out of
> curiosity usually. There is no pressure. If they don't ever eat
> certain foods will it harm them? Of course not.
>
> And what a person doesn't like one year, they may like the next.
> Tastes change drastically over time. Trevor (17) even likes sushi now
> (he's got pretty American tastes most of the time).
>
> Ren
> learninginfreedom.com
>
>
>
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Joyce Fetteroll
On Jan 8, 2007, at 4:51 PM, Ariannah Armstrong wrote:
there isn't a requirement for how closely someone follows the advice.
(There are other lists for people who only want to network and
socialize with others who self-identify as unschoolers.)
Think of the list as an information resource. It's a place to get
advice on *unschooling* ways to get unschooling running more
smoothly. (As opposed to advice on how to compromise to make parents
more comfortable with unschooling.)
Some will take most of the advice. Some will take some of the advice.
Some people will take the unschooling advice for academics and
maintain more traditional parenting. Some will take the unschooling
advice for everything but religion or math or food or bedtimes.
But the list is set up for unschoolers to help people who want to
apply the principles of unschooling in their homes and are seeking
the advice on how to put those principles into practice. The list
isn't for people who are seeking (or offering) advice on how to mesh
unschooling with traditional schooling or parenting. But unschoolers
here can help people who want to deal with the fears that make
someone want to unschool part way. It's not for advice on how to make
kids read the Torah or the Bible when they're trusting their kids to
learn everything else by living. But unschoolers here can help people
who want to know how other unschoolers have managed to unschool what
seems to be un-unschoolable.
What's happened -- in a big flurry for some reason! -- is many new
people are telling others why they have no intention of taking the
advice or doing any such thing.
That's not what the list is for. It *is* though for people to say and
ask, "That makes me uncomfortable. How can you make that work?
Doesn't xxx happen?"
Joyce
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> For instance, can people who are vegetarian or vegan forThere are no cards. And the list isn't meant to be a social group so
> personal, environmental or ethical reasons still call themselves
> "unschoolers?" Can Jewish people be unschoolers? ....
>
> That's something I'm a little timid about. I just want to know if all
> "types" are card-carrying unschoolers according to the group here. :)
> I ask this pleasantly, and positively, as I'm eager to learn more.
there isn't a requirement for how closely someone follows the advice.
(There are other lists for people who only want to network and
socialize with others who self-identify as unschoolers.)
Think of the list as an information resource. It's a place to get
advice on *unschooling* ways to get unschooling running more
smoothly. (As opposed to advice on how to compromise to make parents
more comfortable with unschooling.)
Some will take most of the advice. Some will take some of the advice.
Some people will take the unschooling advice for academics and
maintain more traditional parenting. Some will take the unschooling
advice for everything but religion or math or food or bedtimes.
But the list is set up for unschoolers to help people who want to
apply the principles of unschooling in their homes and are seeking
the advice on how to put those principles into practice. The list
isn't for people who are seeking (or offering) advice on how to mesh
unschooling with traditional schooling or parenting. But unschoolers
here can help people who want to deal with the fears that make
someone want to unschool part way. It's not for advice on how to make
kids read the Torah or the Bible when they're trusting their kids to
learn everything else by living. But unschoolers here can help people
who want to know how other unschoolers have managed to unschool what
seems to be un-unschoolable.
What's happened -- in a big flurry for some reason! -- is many new
people are telling others why they have no intention of taking the
advice or doing any such thing.
That's not what the list is for. It *is* though for people to say and
ask, "That makes me uncomfortable. How can you make that work?
Doesn't xxx happen?"
Joyce
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]