Gifted
[email protected]
I've been thinking about "giftedness."
If one is truly gifted, wouldn't that be true for the person's
lilfetime?
There were kids I knew when I was growing up who were labeled gifted
who have done nothing with their "gifts"---for many reasons. Some were
far ahead of the rest of us; as the rest of us caught up, they became
just like the rest. Some were burnt out because their parents pushed so
hard; they lost the desire to learn/do more. Some, of course, had
*real* gifts and went on to use them wholly and fully. Some
rediscovered themselves after years of feeling lost and labeled. Funny.
Seeing the child simply as Who He Is *has* to be better than
*qualifying* who he is.
Were any of you labeled as gifted? What have you done with that
giftedness? Labeled as LD ("retarded" before LD became PC). Did you
know folks with these labels? What has become of them? Who was your
high school valedictorian? What's s/he doing now? What's the average
classmate doing now? The drop-out?
I had a 28 year reunion party last month. It was very interesting to
see who's doing what and why. I asked a lot of questions of many
people. The reasons folks chose the jobs/careers/paths they
have---pretty interesting. Made me appreciate letting my children
follow their passions and unschooling all the more!
~Kelly
________________________________________________________________________
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security tools, free access to millions of high-quality videos from
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If one is truly gifted, wouldn't that be true for the person's
lilfetime?
There were kids I knew when I was growing up who were labeled gifted
who have done nothing with their "gifts"---for many reasons. Some were
far ahead of the rest of us; as the rest of us caught up, they became
just like the rest. Some were burnt out because their parents pushed so
hard; they lost the desire to learn/do more. Some, of course, had
*real* gifts and went on to use them wholly and fully. Some
rediscovered themselves after years of feeling lost and labeled. Funny.
Seeing the child simply as Who He Is *has* to be better than
*qualifying* who he is.
Were any of you labeled as gifted? What have you done with that
giftedness? Labeled as LD ("retarded" before LD became PC). Did you
know folks with these labels? What has become of them? Who was your
high school valedictorian? What's s/he doing now? What's the average
classmate doing now? The drop-out?
I had a 28 year reunion party last month. It was very interesting to
see who's doing what and why. I asked a lot of questions of many
people. The reasons folks chose the jobs/careers/paths they
have---pretty interesting. Made me appreciate letting my children
follow their passions and unschooling all the more!
~Kelly
________________________________________________________________________
Check out the new AOL. Most comprehensive set of free safety and
security tools, free access to millions of high-quality videos from
across the web, free AOL Mail and more.
Sylvia Toyama
Were any of you labeled as gifted? What have you done with that
giftedness? Labeled as LD ("retarded" before LD became PC). Did you
know folks with these labels? What has become of them? Who was your
high school valedictorian? What's s/he doing now? What's the average
classmate doing now? The drop-out?
****
The label gifted wasn't being used widely where/when I was in high school, but I was required by the school to take 'honors' level classes. Yes, required. I remember when I was signing up for junior year writing/English classes. I really didn't want to take the two choices available to me. There were three 'writing' credit classes -- Composition, which was a basic writing class; Informative Writing, a very intensive weekly paper kinda class (where all the really brainy kids ended up); and Humanities, a two-hour block honors class encompassing writing and social studies. I really wanted to take Composition -- I wanted to be normal for cryin' out loud, and I hated to write (and I wanted a break, since I was taking a 3-hr foreign language class, keeping me in school from 7am to 5pm, M-F). I had to have my 10th grade English teacher sign off on my choice and she refused to sign off on Composition -- told me I was too smart for that class and would only be allowed to take
the honors choices. I would have done anything to avoid Informative Writing, so I took Humanities. I ended up hating it. The reading books assigned were awful, and the teacher was a joke. I did become a writer that year -- in my Popular Fiction elective class, of all places.
At the same time I was taking honors English/Social Studies classes, I was struggling to get thru one year's worth of Algebra in two years (really, dumb math for girls, but it served my mathphobia just fine, thank you) and Applied Chemistry (dumb chemistry for girls and jocks). So, it was a mixed bag for me. I felt really bad about the remedial-level math/science classes, and trapped in the honors level english/social studies classes.
We three grew up being told how smart we were -- well, they told us we'd all scored higher than 160 on the IQ tests, and that one of us scored two points higher than the others, but to 'avoid hurt feelngs' didn't tell us our exact scores (like we even cared at that point who was smarter). I remember often being told "you're too smart to make that kind of mistake" as kid -- what I felt/heard was that I was too smart to make any mistakes. It sucked being smarter or whatever we were supposed to be.
I haven't been to any reunions, but I have kept up with/ recontaced some of my classmates. The really smart one, of whom everyone had expected great things, has gone to do great things professionally -- she holds several patents, became an Electrical Engineer, then went to law school and is now a Patent Lawyer. She's also twice-divorced (7 yrs ago, by now she's likely 3x divorced) and when we wrote all she could talk about was how much she disliked/resented her stepdaughters by dh #3. Not exactly what I'd call successful and happy, but to each her own, I guess.
I graduated, my brother and sister did not, so I know two drop-outs. Both went on to find good jobs; none of us went to college. I was so mad when they were both allowed to drop out -- I would have gladly stopped, but I knew they'd kill me if I even so much as failed a class, much less dropped out!
Most people I know who went to college don't work in their degree field. Most, it seems, tried it out and found it was a bad fit for them. The few I know who have worked in their field and been happy at were the kind of people who'd known since age 5 what they wanted to be. I never really knew what I wanted to be when I grew up -- except a Mom, and in the 70's that alone wasn't a high enough aspiration for a smart girl, or at least so my Mom told me.
When Will was 8 (2nd grade), I let the schools test him because they bugged me so about it (I knew he wasn't LD and thought it would get them off my back). They ruled out LD, deciding instead that he was either lazy and unmotivated, or had bad study skills, or maybe his homelife (me, yanno) just didn't encourage him enough. It seems that even when one can avoid the LD label, they have another one handy to put on a child. I realized then that the whole point of the labels is to remove all responsbility for failure from the school system -- it becomes all about the child's flaws. Either s/he never had any potential, or s/he squandered it despite the schools 'best' efforts. Really a very handy system for the schools, doncha think?.
Sylvia
Mom to
Will (21) Andy (10) and Dan (5-1/2)
www.ourhapahome.blogspot.com
Life is what happens while youre busy making other plans. ~ John Lennon
---------------------------------
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
giftedness? Labeled as LD ("retarded" before LD became PC). Did you
know folks with these labels? What has become of them? Who was your
high school valedictorian? What's s/he doing now? What's the average
classmate doing now? The drop-out?
****
The label gifted wasn't being used widely where/when I was in high school, but I was required by the school to take 'honors' level classes. Yes, required. I remember when I was signing up for junior year writing/English classes. I really didn't want to take the two choices available to me. There were three 'writing' credit classes -- Composition, which was a basic writing class; Informative Writing, a very intensive weekly paper kinda class (where all the really brainy kids ended up); and Humanities, a two-hour block honors class encompassing writing and social studies. I really wanted to take Composition -- I wanted to be normal for cryin' out loud, and I hated to write (and I wanted a break, since I was taking a 3-hr foreign language class, keeping me in school from 7am to 5pm, M-F). I had to have my 10th grade English teacher sign off on my choice and she refused to sign off on Composition -- told me I was too smart for that class and would only be allowed to take
the honors choices. I would have done anything to avoid Informative Writing, so I took Humanities. I ended up hating it. The reading books assigned were awful, and the teacher was a joke. I did become a writer that year -- in my Popular Fiction elective class, of all places.
At the same time I was taking honors English/Social Studies classes, I was struggling to get thru one year's worth of Algebra in two years (really, dumb math for girls, but it served my mathphobia just fine, thank you) and Applied Chemistry (dumb chemistry for girls and jocks). So, it was a mixed bag for me. I felt really bad about the remedial-level math/science classes, and trapped in the honors level english/social studies classes.
We three grew up being told how smart we were -- well, they told us we'd all scored higher than 160 on the IQ tests, and that one of us scored two points higher than the others, but to 'avoid hurt feelngs' didn't tell us our exact scores (like we even cared at that point who was smarter). I remember often being told "you're too smart to make that kind of mistake" as kid -- what I felt/heard was that I was too smart to make any mistakes. It sucked being smarter or whatever we were supposed to be.
I haven't been to any reunions, but I have kept up with/ recontaced some of my classmates. The really smart one, of whom everyone had expected great things, has gone to do great things professionally -- she holds several patents, became an Electrical Engineer, then went to law school and is now a Patent Lawyer. She's also twice-divorced (7 yrs ago, by now she's likely 3x divorced) and when we wrote all she could talk about was how much she disliked/resented her stepdaughters by dh #3. Not exactly what I'd call successful and happy, but to each her own, I guess.
I graduated, my brother and sister did not, so I know two drop-outs. Both went on to find good jobs; none of us went to college. I was so mad when they were both allowed to drop out -- I would have gladly stopped, but I knew they'd kill me if I even so much as failed a class, much less dropped out!
Most people I know who went to college don't work in their degree field. Most, it seems, tried it out and found it was a bad fit for them. The few I know who have worked in their field and been happy at were the kind of people who'd known since age 5 what they wanted to be. I never really knew what I wanted to be when I grew up -- except a Mom, and in the 70's that alone wasn't a high enough aspiration for a smart girl, or at least so my Mom told me.
When Will was 8 (2nd grade), I let the schools test him because they bugged me so about it (I knew he wasn't LD and thought it would get them off my back). They ruled out LD, deciding instead that he was either lazy and unmotivated, or had bad study skills, or maybe his homelife (me, yanno) just didn't encourage him enough. It seems that even when one can avoid the LD label, they have another one handy to put on a child. I realized then that the whole point of the labels is to remove all responsbility for failure from the school system -- it becomes all about the child's flaws. Either s/he never had any potential, or s/he squandered it despite the schools 'best' efforts. Really a very handy system for the schools, doncha think?.
Sylvia
Mom to
Will (21) Andy (10) and Dan (5-1/2)
www.ourhapahome.blogspot.com
Life is what happens while youre busy making other plans. ~ John Lennon
---------------------------------
Check out the all-new Yahoo! Mail beta - Fire up a more powerful email and get things done faster.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
wuweimama
--- In [email protected], kbcdlovejo@... wrote:
became > just like the rest. Some were burnt out because their parents
pushed so > hard; they lost the desire to learn/do more. Some, of
course, had > *real* gifts and went on to use them wholly and fully.
Some > rediscovered themselves after years of feeling lost and
labeled. Funny.
and its editorials. There has been some ongoing discussion about Peter
Kowalke's "Grown Without Schooling" articles in his column. The gist
was around the expectation of unschooled children "doing more" with
their lives, rather than succombing to the mainstream economic
machine, away from "natural" living. Both your questions about 'those
who were labeled gifted have done nothing with their "gifts"', and the
projection that unschooled children should "do more" (in the magazine)
are similar in nature, imo. They are Product Oriented.
You stated that "Seeing the child simply as Who He Is *has* to be
better than *qualifying* who he is." I would suggest, that to me,
seeing the child OR adult as Who He Is, is preferable to What He Does,
or How He Was Labeled. I understand your list of questions to be
rhetorical and reflective; but perhaps, the more relevant question is
'Are they happy?' I believe that we would agree that question is
significant at any age, regardless of labels being used or not.
And generally, the term gifted is used in an academic sense indicating
exceptional intellectual computation ability. As most of us believe,
emotional (environmental/nurture) issues are as profound in our lives
as genetic (nature) issues, in the present, not only the future.
Pat
>were > far ahead of the rest of us; as the rest of us caught up, they
> I've been thinking about "giftedness."
>
> If one is truly gifted, wouldn't that be true for the person's
> lilfetime?
>
> There were kids I knew when I was growing up who were labeled gifted
> who have done nothing with their "gifts"---for many reasons. Some
became > just like the rest. Some were burnt out because their parents
pushed so > hard; they lost the desire to learn/do more. Some, of
course, had > *real* gifts and went on to use them wholly and fully.
Some > rediscovered themselves after years of feeling lost and
labeled. Funny.
>Kelly, your questions reminded me of the latest Life Learning magazine
> Seeing the child simply as Who He Is *has* to be better than
> *qualifying* who he is.
>
> Were any of you labeled as gifted? What have you done with that
> giftedness? Labeled as LD ("retarded" before LD became PC). Did you
> know folks with these labels? What has become of them? Who was your
> high school valedictorian? What's s/he doing now? What's the average
> classmate doing now? The drop-out?
>
> I had a 28 year reunion party last month. It was very interesting to
> see who's doing what and why. I asked a lot of questions of many
> people. The reasons folks chose the jobs/careers/paths they
> have---pretty interesting. Made me appreciate letting my children
> follow their passions and unschooling all the more!
>
and its editorials. There has been some ongoing discussion about Peter
Kowalke's "Grown Without Schooling" articles in his column. The gist
was around the expectation of unschooled children "doing more" with
their lives, rather than succombing to the mainstream economic
machine, away from "natural" living. Both your questions about 'those
who were labeled gifted have done nothing with their "gifts"', and the
projection that unschooled children should "do more" (in the magazine)
are similar in nature, imo. They are Product Oriented.
You stated that "Seeing the child simply as Who He Is *has* to be
better than *qualifying* who he is." I would suggest, that to me,
seeing the child OR adult as Who He Is, is preferable to What He Does,
or How He Was Labeled. I understand your list of questions to be
rhetorical and reflective; but perhaps, the more relevant question is
'Are they happy?' I believe that we would agree that question is
significant at any age, regardless of labels being used or not.
And generally, the term gifted is used in an academic sense indicating
exceptional intellectual computation ability. As most of us believe,
emotional (environmental/nurture) issues are as profound in our lives
as genetic (nature) issues, in the present, not only the future.
Pat
[email protected]
-----Original Message-----
From: wuweimama@...
Both your questions about 'those
who were labeled gifted have done nothing with their "gifts"', and the
projection that unschooled children should "do more" (in the magazine)
are similar in nature, imo. They are Product Oriented.
-=-=-=-=-
Yep. I haven't read the last two issues. They are staring at me now.
<g> But I haven't picked them up yet.
I wasn't talking about unschoolers though. Schooled kids who have been
touted as the "best" at something---you know, the LABELED ones! <g>
-=-=-=-=-
You stated that "Seeing the child simply as Who He Is *has* to be
better than *qualifying* who he is." I would suggest, that to me,
seeing the child OR adult as Who He Is, is preferable to What He Does,
or How He Was Labeled.
-=-=-=
Certainly---adults too!
--=--=-=-=-
I understand your list of questions to be
rhetorical and reflective; but perhaps, the more relevant question is
'Are they happy?' I believe that we would agree that question is
significant at any age, regardless of labels being used or not.
-=-=-=-=-=
Sure!
And that was one of the interesting things I discovered at my reunion.
The happy vs the successful vs the "average student" vs the
valedictorian vs the "poor student" vs the passionate vs the
"whatever"---it was very eye-opening!
This was a top private school. A lot was riding on each graduate.
Competition was tough.
The happiness levels of these adults ranged from high to very, very
low. So did "success."
-=-=-==-
And generally, the term gifted is used in an academic sense indicating
exceptional intellectual computation ability.
-=-=-
And generally limited to math/science and language arts.
Gifted in music & art & sports are considered "extras" only *after* the
math and English are done.
Gifted in relationships/social situations, nature/animals, problem
solving, management, cooperation and others are not counted at all.
~Kelly
________________________________________________________________________
Check out the new AOL. Most comprehensive set of free safety and
security tools, free access to millions of high-quality videos from
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From: wuweimama@...
Both your questions about 'those
who were labeled gifted have done nothing with their "gifts"', and the
projection that unschooled children should "do more" (in the magazine)
are similar in nature, imo. They are Product Oriented.
-=-=-=-=-
Yep. I haven't read the last two issues. They are staring at me now.
<g> But I haven't picked them up yet.
I wasn't talking about unschoolers though. Schooled kids who have been
touted as the "best" at something---you know, the LABELED ones! <g>
-=-=-=-=-
You stated that "Seeing the child simply as Who He Is *has* to be
better than *qualifying* who he is." I would suggest, that to me,
seeing the child OR adult as Who He Is, is preferable to What He Does,
or How He Was Labeled.
-=-=-=
Certainly---adults too!
--=--=-=-=-
I understand your list of questions to be
rhetorical and reflective; but perhaps, the more relevant question is
'Are they happy?' I believe that we would agree that question is
significant at any age, regardless of labels being used or not.
-=-=-=-=-=
Sure!
And that was one of the interesting things I discovered at my reunion.
The happy vs the successful vs the "average student" vs the
valedictorian vs the "poor student" vs the passionate vs the
"whatever"---it was very eye-opening!
This was a top private school. A lot was riding on each graduate.
Competition was tough.
The happiness levels of these adults ranged from high to very, very
low. So did "success."
-=-=-==-
And generally, the term gifted is used in an academic sense indicating
exceptional intellectual computation ability.
-=-=-
And generally limited to math/science and language arts.
Gifted in music & art & sports are considered "extras" only *after* the
math and English are done.
Gifted in relationships/social situations, nature/animals, problem
solving, management, cooperation and others are not counted at all.
~Kelly
________________________________________________________________________
Check out the new AOL. Most comprehensive set of free safety and
security tools, free access to millions of high-quality videos from
across the web, free AOL Mail and more.
Carrie Yandell
I don't post much but because my experience regarding this question
has so profoundly affected my life I thought I'd throw it out there...
I was always in "honors" and great things were expected of both me and
my brother. My dad set a tough standard by growing up poor, working
his way through college in 3 years and then a scholarship to medical
school where he shown brilliantly. He is not a happy man although a
very successful doctor. My dad asked me once what was important to me
in life, and I said happiness. He said it should be success.
I loved classical piano and was pretty good at it by my own standards.
So I applied for and went to the Youth Performing Arts School in my
area for piano. And there I met people who were brilliant. I met
people who were composers. I met people who lived and breathed music.
I met Musicians. It quickly became apparent to me that I wasn't one of
those people. I was good, I enjoyed it, but I was not a Musician.
And I felt really deflated. I had been told for so long that I was so
good, that it was a huge shock to find out I wasn't the best. And in
response I just gave up. I haven't played piano now in about 14 years.
You could say a lot of things about the above, but the funny thing is
that I AM happy now, at least far happier than I've ever been in my
entire life. I am staying at home with my 2 year old and for the most
part I love it. For all of my honors classes I don't have a degree
that's of any use to me and I don't have a "career".
For what it's worth, most of the people I have kept up with in those
honors classes aren't doing anything particularly heroic. Most of us
aren't doing anything related to our degrees. And those of us with the
strangest, most unlikely jobs, are the happiest, I would say. Except
for one dear friend who really lost her way is about to go to jail for
meth. Labels have not been good to me and I cringe every time someone
goes on about how clever my son is.
Carrie
has so profoundly affected my life I thought I'd throw it out there...
I was always in "honors" and great things were expected of both me and
my brother. My dad set a tough standard by growing up poor, working
his way through college in 3 years and then a scholarship to medical
school where he shown brilliantly. He is not a happy man although a
very successful doctor. My dad asked me once what was important to me
in life, and I said happiness. He said it should be success.
I loved classical piano and was pretty good at it by my own standards.
So I applied for and went to the Youth Performing Arts School in my
area for piano. And there I met people who were brilliant. I met
people who were composers. I met people who lived and breathed music.
I met Musicians. It quickly became apparent to me that I wasn't one of
those people. I was good, I enjoyed it, but I was not a Musician.
And I felt really deflated. I had been told for so long that I was so
good, that it was a huge shock to find out I wasn't the best. And in
response I just gave up. I haven't played piano now in about 14 years.
You could say a lot of things about the above, but the funny thing is
that I AM happy now, at least far happier than I've ever been in my
entire life. I am staying at home with my 2 year old and for the most
part I love it. For all of my honors classes I don't have a degree
that's of any use to me and I don't have a "career".
For what it's worth, most of the people I have kept up with in those
honors classes aren't doing anything particularly heroic. Most of us
aren't doing anything related to our degrees. And those of us with the
strangest, most unlikely jobs, are the happiest, I would say. Except
for one dear friend who really lost her way is about to go to jail for
meth. Labels have not been good to me and I cringe every time someone
goes on about how clever my son is.
Carrie
Kelly Weyd
Your post reminded me of my cousin who was at my house yesterday. She was tops at everything. Graduated #1 both in her High School and College. Absolutely Brilliant Girl (as she was labeled). But I really don't think any of that scholarly stuff really mattered to her. Once she got out in the professional business world........well she hated it, and realized it was just not her. Her Passion: Animals! Especially dogs. So she gave up what could have been a very lucrative, and successful (by some standards) career. She now owns one of these places with the big tubs to bath your own dogs. She does not make a lot of money at it, but she is doing her own thing, and is happy........much more important than all the money in the world. She also judges Dog Agility shows so that is why she was out visiting my area. We went to the show she was judging and had a great time. And I can definately see where labeling my cousin gifted/talented/smart or whatever was really
damaging to her. She was expected to do absolutely exceptional things by society's standards and by her parents standards........it must have been pure hell for her. I found her to be a very successful, interesting person to talk to.
Kelly
Carrie Yandell <cyandell@...> wrote:
I don't post much but because my experience regarding this question
has so profoundly affected my life I thought I'd throw it out there...
I was always in "honors" and great things were expected of both me and
my brother. My dad set a tough standard by growing up poor, working
his way through college in 3 years and then a scholarship to medical
school where he shown brilliantly. He is not a happy man although a
very successful doctor. My dad asked me once what was important to me
in life, and I said happiness. He said it should be success.
I loved classical piano and was pretty good at it by my own standards.
So I applied for and went to the Youth Performing Arts School in my
area for piano. And there I met people who were brilliant. I met
people who were composers. I met people who lived and breathed music.
I met Musicians. It quickly became apparent to me that I wasn't one of
those people. I was good, I enjoyed it, but I was not a Musician.
And I felt really deflated. I had been told for so long that I was so
good, that it was a huge shock to find out I wasn't the best. And in
response I just gave up. I haven't played piano now in about 14 years.
You could say a lot of things about the above, but the funny thing is
that I AM happy now, at least far happier than I've ever been in my
entire life. I am staying at home with my 2 year old and for the most
part I love it. For all of my honors classes I don't have a degree
that's of any use to me and I don't have a "career".
For what it's worth, most of the people I have kept up with in those
honors classes aren't doing anything particularly heroic. Most of us
aren't doing anything related to our degrees. And those of us with the
strangest, most unlikely jobs, are the happiest, I would say. Except
for one dear friend who really lost her way is about to go to jail for
meth. Labels have not been good to me and I cringe every time someone
goes on about how clever my son is.
Carrie
---------------------------------
Everyone is raving about the all-new Yahoo! Mail beta.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
damaging to her. She was expected to do absolutely exceptional things by society's standards and by her parents standards........it must have been pure hell for her. I found her to be a very successful, interesting person to talk to.
Kelly
Carrie Yandell <cyandell@...> wrote:
I don't post much but because my experience regarding this question
has so profoundly affected my life I thought I'd throw it out there...
I was always in "honors" and great things were expected of both me and
my brother. My dad set a tough standard by growing up poor, working
his way through college in 3 years and then a scholarship to medical
school where he shown brilliantly. He is not a happy man although a
very successful doctor. My dad asked me once what was important to me
in life, and I said happiness. He said it should be success.
I loved classical piano and was pretty good at it by my own standards.
So I applied for and went to the Youth Performing Arts School in my
area for piano. And there I met people who were brilliant. I met
people who were composers. I met people who lived and breathed music.
I met Musicians. It quickly became apparent to me that I wasn't one of
those people. I was good, I enjoyed it, but I was not a Musician.
And I felt really deflated. I had been told for so long that I was so
good, that it was a huge shock to find out I wasn't the best. And in
response I just gave up. I haven't played piano now in about 14 years.
You could say a lot of things about the above, but the funny thing is
that I AM happy now, at least far happier than I've ever been in my
entire life. I am staying at home with my 2 year old and for the most
part I love it. For all of my honors classes I don't have a degree
that's of any use to me and I don't have a "career".
For what it's worth, most of the people I have kept up with in those
honors classes aren't doing anything particularly heroic. Most of us
aren't doing anything related to our degrees. And those of us with the
strangest, most unlikely jobs, are the happiest, I would say. Except
for one dear friend who really lost her way is about to go to jail for
meth. Labels have not been good to me and I cringe every time someone
goes on about how clever my son is.
Carrie
---------------------------------
Everyone is raving about the all-new Yahoo! Mail beta.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Vickisue Gray
All these posts point out something interesting to me.
I was one of those "smart" kids but always felt average
as I was not as smart as my friends. My mom always
touted the 'you can do whatever you want - just be happy'
but never gave any guidance of what was out there. (I was very naive)
I had no idea of what type of jobs were even out there let alone how
to get one. I now have an awesome job but I stumbled into it by accident.
I totally agree that it's VERY important to enjoy if not LOVE what you do.
I like what my FIL did for my spouse. He helped him to explore his
interest, took him to meet people who worked in the fields of interest,
and spent time helping him figure out how he would attain them.
My spouse has been very happy in his life doing just what he likes.
Vicki who admirers her spouse and his free spirit
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
I was one of those "smart" kids but always felt average
as I was not as smart as my friends. My mom always
touted the 'you can do whatever you want - just be happy'
but never gave any guidance of what was out there. (I was very naive)
I had no idea of what type of jobs were even out there let alone how
to get one. I now have an awesome job but I stumbled into it by accident.
I totally agree that it's VERY important to enjoy if not LOVE what you do.
I like what my FIL did for my spouse. He helped him to explore his
interest, took him to meet people who worked in the fields of interest,
and spent time helping him figure out how he would attain them.
My spouse has been very happy in his life doing just what he likes.
Vicki who admirers her spouse and his free spirit
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
jlh44music
Sylvia Toyama <sylgt04@...> wrote:
the labels is to remove all responsbility for failure from the school
system -- it becomes all about the child's flaws. Either s/he never
had any potential, or s/he squandered it despite the schools 'best'
efforts. Really a very handy system for the schools, doncha think?.>>
Exactly - pin the "failure" on the child and not on the school not
doing their job. Having a child who had been in school up through 6th
grade (2 years ago) this really hits home. I allowed a label of ADHD 5
years ago (LONG before I had ever heard of unschooling or even
considered homeschooling) because I thought it would get her some
services (NOT). I now know that my dd is very right-brained, which is
not compatible with the predominantly left-brained way many schools
operate.
Jann
>It seems that even when one can avoid the LD label, they have anotherone handy to put on a child. I realized then that the whole point of
the labels is to remove all responsbility for failure from the school
system -- it becomes all about the child's flaws. Either s/he never
had any potential, or s/he squandered it despite the schools 'best'
efforts. Really a very handy system for the schools, doncha think?.>>
Exactly - pin the "failure" on the child and not on the school not
doing their job. Having a child who had been in school up through 6th
grade (2 years ago) this really hits home. I allowed a label of ADHD 5
years ago (LONG before I had ever heard of unschooling or even
considered homeschooling) because I thought it would get her some
services (NOT). I now know that my dd is very right-brained, which is
not compatible with the predominantly left-brained way many schools
operate.
Jann
Michelle Leifur Reid
On 11/28/06, jlh44music <jlh44music@...> wrote:
school system. He is a bright, active, inquisitive, and creative
child. He is in the "gifted" program through their school system.
Last year was a bit challenging and they changed teachers to try to
find something that would work better for him. This year has been a
disaster and the schools are insisting that he is ADHD and needs
medicating. Fortunately my friend is not buying into the medicating
part, but she does believe that he is ADHD. I look at him and see a
completely BORED child. He is one of those left-brainy kids and so is
considered to not fit in. He is now in jeopardy of losing his
"gifted" status. Ooops I guess suddenly he's just average. :P
Michelle
> I allowed a label of ADHD 5I have a friend that I have tried so hard to get her son out of the
> years ago (LONG before I had ever heard of unschooling or even
> considered homeschooling) because I thought it would get her some
> services (NOT). I now know that my dd is very right-brained, which is
> not compatible with the predominantly left-brained way many schools
> operate.
school system. He is a bright, active, inquisitive, and creative
child. He is in the "gifted" program through their school system.
Last year was a bit challenging and they changed teachers to try to
find something that would work better for him. This year has been a
disaster and the schools are insisting that he is ADHD and needs
medicating. Fortunately my friend is not buying into the medicating
part, but she does believe that he is ADHD. I look at him and see a
completely BORED child. He is one of those left-brainy kids and so is
considered to not fit in. He is now in jeopardy of losing his
"gifted" status. Ooops I guess suddenly he's just average. :P
Michelle