Sharissa13

Hi, my name is Christy and I am working on homeschooling (unschooling) my 8 year old son. I understand that every family has their own style and each child earns in their own way, but I have a question (of course). Is there anyone else here who is unschooling an autistic child?

My son is autistic (high functioning) and after seeing what the public school system could offer him (or lack thereof), I opted to try my hand at homeschooling. I looked at curriculums, but none of them seemed to match how my son learned (although I was frequently reminded by other homeschooling friends that I could tailor things to fit my son's style). That's when I decided to give unschooling a try.

So if anyone has experience with this method on an autistic person, I'd love to pick your brain a little. Thanks, and I look forward to being a member of this group. :)


---------------------------------
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Melissa

I am unschooling both high functioning and a low functioning autistic
kids, and they are both thriving. Feel free to email me offlist, if
you like.
Melissa
Mom to Josh (11), Breanna (9), Emily (7), Rachel (6), Sam (5), Dan
(3), and Avari Rose

share our lives at
http://360.yahoo.com/multimomma



On Sep 15, 2006, at 7:31 PM, Sharissa13 wrote:

> Hi, my name is Christy and I am working on homeschooling
> (unschooling) my 8 year old son. I understand that every family has
> their own style and each child earns in their own way, but I have a
> question (of course). Is there anyone else here who is unschooling
> an autistic child?
>
> My son is autistic (high functioning) and after seeing what the
> public school system could offer him (or lack thereof), I opted to
> try my hand at homeschooling. I looked at curriculums, but none of
> them seemed to match how my son learned (although I was frequently
> reminded by other homeschooling friends that I could tailor things
> to fit my son's style). That's when I decided to give unschooling a
> try.
>
> So if anyone has experience with this method on an autistic person,
> I'd love to pick your brain a little. Thanks, and I look forward to
> being a member of this group. :)
>
>
> ---------------------------------
> All-new Yahoo! Mail - Fire up a more powerful email and get things
> done faster.
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
>
>



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

taliasafa

So if anyone has experience with this method on an autistic person,
I'd love to pick your brain a little.

======

I don't have experience, but I thought this link might be helpful to
you or someone with an autistic child:

http://www.fernridgepress.com/

You may be able to find her books at the library or through
Inter-Libarary Loan. I have read posts from people who have had good
results with the excercises she prescribes.

Schools tend to try to treat the symtems and this is about treating
the cause of Autistic behavior in the brain. It may be a good place to
start and it might even be fun and low stress (I really don't know
first-hand, though), if you just know that any effort you put into it
can do some good.

_talia

Michelle Leifur Reid

On 9/15/06, Sharissa13 <sharissa13@...> wrote:
> Hi, my name is Christy and I am working on homeschooling (unschooling) my 8 year old son. I understand that every family has their own style and each child earns in their own way, but I have a question (of course). Is there anyone else here who is unschooling an autistic child?
>

Several of us have children within the autistic spectrum. It is very
doable and my son thrives at home. If your son has been home up to
this point, then you have already been homeschooling him all this
time. He has managed to survive, grow, and hopefully explore and
thrive. Why should that change just because he has turned school-age?

Welcome to the group!

--
Michelle
Michelle Leifur Reid
YOUR Pampered Chef Consultant
850-474-0817
http://www.pamperedchef.biz/michellelr
Check out my homeschool cooking classes!

mona_t60

Hi! I am new here. This is my 3rd year of homeschooling my son &
daughter. My daughter is a senior this year & my son is in 3rd grade.
They both have OCD. I have tried more traditional approaches of
schooling them & have ended up with all of us being stressed. I am
interested in learning more about unschooling. For the month of
December I have let them make their own choices throughout the day as
to what they want to do. My son is not reading well yet, but I have
noticed that since we are not "working' on it he has been reading
signs & other things that he wasn't before. Just want to hear from
more experienced unschoolers as to what their experiences have been.

Thanks,
Ramona

Nicole Willoughby

I cant say much about the unschooling part as my kids happen to be in school right now.
But I can tell you that she is also OCD and her psychiatrist suggested homeschooling last year. She choose to go to school this year because at the time we had no transportation to do anything, new place , no friends yet and in the middle of nowhere :). She knows she is free to leave but so far chooses to stay.

A bout Reading..... A teacher of 16 years recently told me. Kids dont start reading because I teach them phonics or any other method they read because they are ready. ... All I can do is provide them with things to read...computers, games , stuff on the walls, books, magazines, recipes etc and then wait patiently. If they arent ready there is absolutely nothing I can do to make them read and if they are there is nothing I can ( or would ) do to slow them down.

Nicole

__________________________________________________
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Joanne

Hi Ramona,

Welcome! Good for you for seeking a better way. :-) Unschooling can
benefit your whole family, not just your children. What a great way to
start a brand new year. :-)

For me, the first step was changing MY way of thinking about learning.
It's hard to unschool when you're thinking in terms of grades and what
they "should" be doing.

Here's some links that may help with that:
http://sandradodd.com/deschooling
http://tinyurl.com/kldjz
http://tinyurl.com/ymudas and http://tinyurl.com/yhpqor

Click on the links section here (in the left sidebar) and take a look
at some of the unschooling blogs for a look at day to day living in an
unschooling family.

Read some of the older threads also. There's a lot of information
there. If you have nay specific questions, feel free to ask and one of
us will be happy to help. :-)

Happy New Year!

~ Joanne ~
Mom to Jacqueline (8), Shawna (11) & Cimion (14)
Adopted into our hearts October 2003
************************************
Unschooling Voices ~ Add Your Voice
www.foreverparents.com/UnschoolingVoices.html

sunflowermom30

hi! i'm tina, mom to 7.5yr old maeven and 2.5yr old tyren
(TEERen)...i'm really struggling with figuring out our homeschool
groove. i have read one of john holt's books "teach your own"...and
unschooling made a lot of sense to me, but i always figured i'd be
more eclectic...some unschooling, some structured...

but reality is really different for us. i didn't really do much for
kindergarten...seeing it more as a transition year and didn't really
feel that there needed to be much more than enriching play
experiences...so now this year has been my first year actually diving
into trying to instigate some sort of "curriculum", but really just a
very eclectic mix of this and that. i'm finding that since i'm an
EXTREMELY routine-challenged mama (can't keep a routine to save my
life...and believe me, i've tried...A LOT) i just can't seem to keep
up any sort of plan i make...and i'm still not entirely certain what
my daughter needs since i can't seem to be consistant with anything.

the only thing i can say i've done mostly really well is read aloud
to her constantly. we go through book after book after book. fiction
AND nonfiction. she LOVES being read to. and listening to audio
books. constantly. so there's that. :)

so now i'm thinking since sitting down and implimenting a curriculum
seems to not be working for us, or at least not me (and if mama
cannot implement it, daughter cannot reap the benefits, soooo....)
i'm wondering if i should look more into unschooling.

i know from reading john holt's book, and from the unschooling chats
i've participated in in the past at my website (mommy chats, we've
had several really great unschooling chats...i need to reread the
transcripts!) that unschooling is not about just not doing
anything...that setting up the environment to be enriching and
encouraging them to explore and setting up opportunities for them to
pursue their own learning is much more complicated than it seems.

so i thought i should see what i could learn here to help us out.

i'm so tired of feeling bad about how things are going and maybe
taking a different approach would relieve my guilt and stress and
help my daughter be happier. (we've got world war 3 going on over
here between the kids and also with how mouthy she's become...i think
she's bored. exploring ideas to try to solve that.)

hoping to pick up some ideas on how daily living can look in an
unschooling home. :) i'll be diving into the archives to see what i
can learn and welcome any ideas anyone would like to share! :)


tina

Kim Musolff

*** i'm so tired of feeling bad about how things are going and maybe
taking a different approach would relieve my guilt and stress and
help my daughter be happier.***

Hi Tina!

I'm pretty new here too, but I had to respond to this, because this is
exactly how I felt about 2 months ago! (Wow! Has it only been 2 months?
It feels like AGES! I feel like I've learned so much since then!) My son
was in kindergarten and having a really tough time. He only went 2
days/week, so I homeschooled him on the days he didn't go to school. Like
you, I had a really hard time sticking to a schedule and doing school at
home. We never bought a curriculum, but I still tried to have "reading
time," "math time, " etc.

A friend introduced me to unschooling. Once I started reading and
researching, I felt this incredible weight lifted. It seems when you put
more trust in your children to let you know what they need, there is less
stress about providing them with "the right thing." It's really freeing.
And the more I learn, the more free I feel.

People here have been incredibly helpful in my journey towards unschooling,
and I'm sure they will do the same for you. Enjoy your journey :)

Kim, in CO


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

-----Original Message-----
From: sunflowermom30 <sunflowermom30@...>

i know from reading john holt's book, and from the unschooling chats
i've participated in in the past at my website (mommy chats, we've
had several really great unschooling chats...i need to reread the
transcripts!) that unschooling is not about just not doing
anything...that setting up the environment to be enriching and
encouraging them to explore and setting up opportunities for them to
pursue their own learning is much more complicated than it seems.

-=-=-=-=-

I don't know that it's "complicated." But it's not NOT doing anything.

John Holt said that doing *nothing* is better than sending them to
school. But he didn't MEAN that parents shouldn't DO things. He just
meant that schools can be more damaging than simply doing nothing and
just letting them BE.

But it's *best*---and unschooling will flow better and make everyone
more *happy*, if you are actively engaged with your child and spend
lots of time "strewing her path" with cool and interesting people,
places, ideas, and things.

The more things you offer, the more things she can choose from.

-=-=-==-=-

i'm so tired of feeling bad about how things are going and maybe
taking a different approach would relieve my guilt and stress and
help my daughter be happier.

-=-=-=-=-=-

At first, this can seem *more* stressful! <g> But it quickly gets
better if you embrace it.

-=-=-=-=-

(we've got world war 3 going on over
here between the kids and also with how mouthy she's become...i think
she's bored. exploring ideas to try to solve that.)

--=-=-=-

Well, please start by not referring to your child as "mouthy." That's
setting things up bad before you even start.

Think POSITIVELY about your children.

-=-=-=-=-

hoping to pick up some ideas on how daily living can look in an
unschooling home. :) i'll be diving into the archives to see what i
can learn and welcome any ideas anyone would like to share! :)

-=-=-=-=-

I'm glad you're looking into the archives. Whenever I join a new list,
I like to read what's already been written so that I know who the
writers are and so that I can get a feel of the list.

I think Sandra ( www.sandradodd.com/unschooling ) has a page of
"typical days" on her site. Do a search there too.

It looks different in each and every home---and often from day to day!
We never have two days just alike here!

~Kelly

Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org

sunflowermom30

thanks. i'm looking through sandra's site too...i actually have
talked to sandra before...she did a chat on my site so i got to talk
to her on the phone ahead of time. i had been on her egroup awhile
back but left because it didn't feel like the right path for me...and
i'm still not sure radical unschooling IS for me, but i want to try
something different, and you never know til you try, so i am looking
more into different things because i'm so bad at instituting any sort
of real regular structure so if i'm going to go more unstructured i
figure i should get myself more educated on a quality way to do it! :)

anyway, one of the things i see mentioned on sandra's site repeatedly
is ENJOYING your children! i SO want this again! we have been
fighting like CRAZY around here lately. and i know NONE of us are
happy with that.

i'm also starting on "respectful parents, respectful kids"
again...didn't get very far in it yet, but it really called to me
before and i feel i need to finish it this time. it seems so far that
it is right inline with the unschooling way of thinking, methinks.

i'm not entirely comfortable with the idea of total unstructure...but
one never knows where tomorrow will lead, eh? anyway even if i don't
go "radical", i might still glean a lot of great ideas from
y'all...so bring them on! :)

i just want to have joy and happiness in my home again!!



tina

--- In [email protected], kbcdlovejo@... wrote:
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: sunflowermom30 <sunflowermom30@...>
>
> i know from reading john holt's book, and from the unschooling chats
> i've participated in in the past at my website (mommy chats, we've
> had several really great unschooling chats...i need to reread the
> transcripts!) that unschooling is not about just not doing
> anything...that setting up the environment to be enriching and
> encouraging them to explore and setting up opportunities for them to
> pursue their own learning is much more complicated than it seems.
>
> -=-=-=-=-
>
> I don't know that it's "complicated." But it's not NOT doing
anything.
>
> John Holt said that doing *nothing* is better than sending them to
> school. But he didn't MEAN that parents shouldn't DO things. He
just
> meant that schools can be more damaging than simply doing nothing
and
> just letting them BE.
>
> But it's *best*---and unschooling will flow better and make
everyone
> more *happy*, if you are actively engaged with your child and spend
> lots of time "strewing her path" with cool and interesting people,
> places, ideas, and things.
>
> The more things you offer, the more things she can choose from.
>
> -=-=-==-=-
>
> i'm so tired of feeling bad about how things are going and maybe
> taking a different approach would relieve my guilt and stress and
> help my daughter be happier.
>
> -=-=-=-=-=-
>
> At first, this can seem *more* stressful! <g> But it quickly gets
> better if you embrace it.
>
> -=-=-=-=-
>
> (we've got world war 3 going on over
> here between the kids and also with how mouthy she's become...i
think
> she's bored. exploring ideas to try to solve that.)
>
> --=-=-=-
>
> Well, please start by not referring to your child as "mouthy."
That's
> setting things up bad before you even start.
>
> Think POSITIVELY about your children.
>
> -=-=-=-=-
>
> hoping to pick up some ideas on how daily living can look in an
> unschooling home. :) i'll be diving into the archives to see what i
> can learn and welcome any ideas anyone would like to share! :)
>
> -=-=-=-=-
>
> I'm glad you're looking into the archives. Whenever I join a new
list,
> I like to read what's already been written so that I know who the
> writers are and so that I can get a feel of the list.
>
> I think Sandra ( www.sandradodd.com/unschooling ) has a page of
> "typical days" on her site. Do a search there too.
>
> It looks different in each and every home---and often from day to
day!
> We never have two days just alike here!
>
> ~Kelly
>
> Kelly Lovejoy
> Conference Coordinator
> Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
> http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org
>

Anne

Hey there,

I found this group while I was surfing the web and thought it would be one I'd like to be a part of. I live in a small town where there are a handful of homeschoolers but all are radically into public school at home. We are definitely not that! I've been schooling my kids at home for 6 years and have tried the curriculum route, but it isn't ideal.We are unschoolers at heart. But when no one else around you is, you are considered a FREAK ! Or at least they just think you're one brick short of a load! Anyway, looking for support.

Thanks
Anne

uuhomeschooler2

We, too, are in a small town and are FREAKS, as well - rather discouraging. I am in an identical position, it seems, to yours. You are not alone, even if you are! It is a lonely road, though - especially when others judge you and tell you that you are a really bad parent (no joke - they have). It really makes you doubt yourself and your kids future. But, if you are going to get help rethinking, I'm sure others here will love to help you! I can just commiserate and try the suggestions, too.

--- In [email protected], "Anne" <maiacovone@...> wrote:
>
> Hey there,
>
> I found this group while I was surfing the web and thought it would be one I'd like to be a part of. I live in a small town where there are a handful of homeschoolers but all are radically into public school at home. We are definitely not that! I've been schooling my kids at home for 6 years and have tried the curriculum route, but it isn't ideal.We are unschoolers at heart. But when no one else around you is, you are considered a FREAK ! Or at least they just think you're one brick short of a load! Anyway, looking for support.
>
> Thanks
> Anne
>

Rala Brubaker

Hi Anne,

We are new to homeschooling and I am really attracted to unschooling but it is tough to hold onto when most of your support system thinks you are crazy.

Welcome!

]Rala

--- On Mon, 4/20/09, Anne <maiacovone@...> wrote:

From: Anne <maiacovone@...>
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] new here
To: [email protected]
Date: Monday, April 20, 2009, 4:48 PM

















Hey there,



I found this group while I was surfing the web and thought it would be one I'd like to be a part of. I live in a small town where there are a handful of homeschoolers but all are radically into public school at home. We are definitely not that! I've been schooling my kids at home for 6 years and have tried the curriculum route, but it isn't ideal.We are unschoolers at heart. But when no one else around you is, you are considered a FREAK ! Or at least they just think you're one brick short of a load! Anyway, looking for support.



Thanks

Anne































[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Tammy Curry

Anne,

Welcome to walking on the abnormal side of life according to society. If you think about it though homeschooling especially unschooling is totally natural, normal and the way we should live. There are lots of good resources on the group homepage under links, it also pays to go back and read past posts as they cover so many topics that come up when starting on this particular journey through life.


Tammy Curry, Director of Chaos
http://tammycurry.blogspot.com/
http://crazy-homeschool-adventures.blogspot.com/

"If a child is to keep alive his inborn sense of wonder, he needs the companionship of at least one adult who can share it, rediscovering with him the joy, excitement and mystery of the world we live in."

Rachel Carson





________________________________
From: Anne <maiacovone@...>
To: [email protected]
Sent: Monday, April 20, 2009 6:48:47 PM
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] new here





Hey there,

I found this group while I was surfing the web and thought it would be one I'd like to be a part of. I live in a small town where there are a handful of homeschoolers but all are radically into public school at home. We are definitely not that! I've been schooling my kids at home for 6 years and have tried the curriculum route, but it isn't ideal.We are unschoolers at heart. But when no one else around you is, you are considered a FREAK ! Or at least they just think you're one brick short of a load! Anyway, looking for support.

Thanks
Anne







[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Wilda Lahmann-Luffman

   Hi Anne,
Welcome!
I don't post very often but I try to read all of the other posts
and really like this group.

Like you, we have tried the curriculum route too,
but have discovered that unschooling works best for us.
My girls are 16 and 11.
We have been homeschooling for 5 years.
(I also have grown children)
Fortunately for us, we recently found a real life homeschool group
locally that has several unschooling families!

Wilda
     


Savannah, Tennessee
"Just this side of Paradise"         Play a game and feed homeless critters at the same time!
http://www.freekibble.com  (Will only take 30 secs of your time!)          


--- On Mon, 4/20/09, Anne <maiacovone@...> wrote:

From: Anne <maiacovone@...>
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] new here
To: [email protected]
Date: Monday, April 20, 2009, 6:48 PM

















Hey there,



I found this group while I was surfing the web and thought it would be one I'd like to be a part of. I live in a small town where there are a handful of homeschoolers but all are radically into public school at home. We are definitely not that! I've been schooling my kids at home for 6 years and have tried the curriculum route, but it isn't ideal.We are unschoolers at heart. But when no one else around you is, you are considered a FREAK ! Or at least they just think you're one brick short of a load! Anyway, looking for support.



Thanks

Anne































[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Debra Rossing

Had to LOL - we (me, DH, DS) take great pleasure in considering
*ourselves* weird - we're just a weird family. So, when someone acts
like we're bizarre, we just laugh and get on with life. The thing is,
once folks see that their opinions matter not one whit, they either
leave it alone or they get curious. We have fun together, DS obviously
enjoys being with us, he just as obviously has an active curiosity and
interest in all sorts of things, and "somehow" he's managed to learn to
read and other stuff. We, fortunately, don't get any grief from family -
they may not agree with our choices, we -definitely- don't agree with
some of their choices, but we just don't go there (unless someone asks
for an opinion on something). Outside of family, people's opinions are
really not much of an issue - their approval or disapproval is not going
to change our life choices. They can think we're crazy all they want -
doesn't hurt us in the least, just takes up their energy; we'd rather
spend our energy being together and just enjoying life as much as
possible. While we know there are other unschoolers 'out there' (and not
too far away from us), we're really not all that involved IRL with many
of them on a regular basis. We're also not all that involved with the
'homeschoolers' that are pretty prevalent (there are lots of
homeschoolers here because the laws are, well, non-existent - there's no
such thing as 'homeschooling laws' here). We do some things if there's
something fun in the works (trips to ballgames or museums or whatever)
but on a day to day basis, we mostly just go about living life.

Deb R


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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Melissa

--- In [email protected], "Anne" <maiacovone@...> wrote:
>
> Hey there,
>
We are unschoolers at heart. But when no one else around you is, you are considered a FREAK ! Or at least they just think you're one brick short of a load! Anyway, looking for support.
>
> Thanks
> Anne


Anne-
Yep- or they think you are a bad parent. Sometimes, I even hide the truth from my mom. I get so sick of her asking, "did you do school today?" I have tried to explain that we learn every day, but people just don't get it.
I hope you find the resources you need here in the group. The posts can be very uplifting and inspiring.
Best wishes,
Melissa - FL

[email protected]

Hi Anne,?? I lot of us are Freaks!!? LOL!? Most of us don't have a unschooling tribe locally!!? You're not alone!!? But we do have great great resources ( conferences, gatherings)?and online support( this groups, Sandra Dodd's always learning, RUN network on Ning, Joyce's site)!? I think its very important not to dwell or get stuck on having to have other unschooling family in a certain mile radius to us.?Me,my?immediate family DH and two DD's are tribe?enough ourselves!?I think society norms... some?how devalues the whole aspect of family socialization(and all the wonderfulness that it entails)??We live in a huge Christian Homeschooling Dogma permeated area!??We, the girls included, seek out people who share our passion, interest, joy...and?some of those, are kids/parents that believe that school is the way. I highly suggest that you try to get to get to a conference or gathering...it will boost your confidence and help you embrace the Freak within!

Elisabeth

?


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

uuhomeschooler2

> Yep- or they think you are a bad parent. Sometimes, I even hide the truth from my mom. I get so sick of her asking, "did you do school today?" I have tried to explain that we learn every day, but people just don't get it.

This is not just a thought for some. We were turned in last month to a hotline because someone thinks we are such bad parents that our kid (the younger 9-yr old) can't "read". We are under investigation and threatened with prosecution because we failed to register our intent to homeschool because we are so adamantly opposed to testing - which is mandated. There are MANY, MANY people who fly under the radar, but we were singled out. The DHS worker doesn't want to do anything about it, but has to see if the prosecuting attorney wants to do anything. It has been extremely stressful. But, we refuse to follow a law which infringes on our most basic rights to privacy and to parent and educate our kids the way we think is best. MOST of the homeschoolers around here that we are close to think we are CRAZY and give us no support. They think it doesn't matter just to take the test. I say that all of them have stressed for weeks about the test and that the government has no right to test my kids over things I am not "studying" with them and then have the results that could someday be used to enact laws that make my right to educated illegal again. Only 2 years ago those test results were used to put kids back in school if they didn't get a good enough grade! And, they only tested half the grades they do now. So, you can't tell me it doesn't matter.

We KNOW our 12 year old didn't read much until she was 10. So, we have a basis to believe that our 9-year old will follow suit. But, he would not be able to even take the test now, let alone do well on something so foreign to his interests and talents at this point in his life.

We are determined to hold out - though we could sign the intent and be done with the investigation - or put them in private school, where the law is unequal and doesn't require testing (inequality is against the 14th Ammendment).

I came from FREE states until we moved here last year. Another friend thought we were silly for worrying and has never registered or tested or been in trouble. So, it was rather shocking. But, I am believing that the prosecuting attorney knows the reality of what people do and has bigger fish to fry. But, the law was tested in 1988 and the people lost on every count in the Supreme Court. Nevertheless, some things have changed since then, including the fact that the tests are not used to put kids back in school. So, we are hopeful the Attorney won't pursue it - but still want to work to change the law and have it repealed. Better yet, I'd like homeschoolers to fall out of the Education Law just like the Private schools so that they are not under those laws at all.

The HSLDA is not at all friendly to those who chose civil liberties over laws. And, they are biased toward religious reasons, which means they help enact laws which are actually harmful to those who simply CHOOSE a different philosophy and way because the laws they help enact are only useful if you belong to a recognized religious sect that says they oppose certain regulations due to religeous belief. Yet, religious belief is anything you hold dear and with deep conviction - but the law doesn't see that.

I've contacted the ACLU, but no response.

Lost 4 pounds the first weekend worrying. I've decided to fight the battle and let it go where it may, though money to fight will be a huge issue.

The law says prosecution, jail, or taking the kids away. I seriously doubt the latter - but I don't want a record either - but this is a just fight. We have never believed in year-end, course-end tests - even though my husband was an educator. He only did it because it was required - but he left that world because he couldn't take how he wasn't allowed to help the kids learn.

Kelli Traaseth

***I highly suggest that you try to get to get to a conference or
gathering... it will boost your confidence and help you embrace the
Freak within!****

That's what I was thinking too.  There are lots of gatherings and conferences to attend and then you can possibly find people who are close to you, meaning-- within a 4 hour radius or so (that's our unschooling neighborhood! ;)

Oh, and also you could check and see if there's a state unschooling yahoo list that you could join.  You might find some contacts there.

Kelli~
  http://ourjoyfullife.blogspot.com/%c2%a0

"There are no ordinary moments."  Dan Millman,  Peaceful Warrior







[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

swissarmy_wife

--- In [email protected], "uuhomeschooler2" <publicprofile34@...> wrote:
>

> We are determined to hold out - though we could sign the intent and be done with the investigation - or put them in private school, where the law is unequal and doesn't require testing (inequality is against the 14th Ammendment).

******Please excuse if you get this twice. My first one disappearred.

Here are my feelings about "flying under the radar".

I think when making the choice to enroll with the state or not there is a lot of things to be taken into consideration. You are jeopardizing your right to homeschool and your children's right to be home. You could be prosecuted, jailed, deemed neglectful, and your children could be sent to school, and worse case scenario taken from you. Please ask yourself if this "chance" is all worth it. Ask yourself, are these risks worth your civil disobedience?

Before you minimize the risk, do some research. Find out EXACTLY what your legal risks are. Some states are very strict and prosecute and some are not when it comes to "non-enrollers". This has nothing to do with how strict the laws are either.

Put it this way, if I ever thought I was jeopardizing my ability to have my children home with me or jeopardizing their futures in some way, then I would enroll straight away. There are times when subjecting children to a yearly test would be better.

I also don't know if everyone here is aware of "kid watch", but there are posters all over schools and ads in newspapers with 800 numbers that anyone can call if they suspect your child isn't getting a proper education. I think someone called the number on me recently while my son had a black eye. My local head start program showed up on my front doorstep with no explanation.

Robin Bentley

> Yep- or they think you are a bad parent. Sometimes, I even hide the
> truth from my mom. I get so sick of her asking, "did you do school
> today?" I have tried to explain that we learn every day, but people
> just don't get it.

No, they don't. So don't try to convert them <g>.

Being confident in what you do, confident in your children's learning
is the best defense. If people want to discuss it in an argumentative
way, you can say "I appreciate what you're saying. I'll give that some
thought. Please pass the bean dip" or "We're doing this as long as it
works for us. When it doesn't, we'll do something different. Please
pass the bean dip."

My husband, when asked about socialization (and was told that our dd
should go to school to learn to deal with bullies) said, with
irony,"Oh, we don't worry about that. Once a week, I take her into the
bathroom and beat her up for her lunch money." That stopped the
conversation dead and people moved on.

Humor is always good. Deflection works well. Arguing your point
usually doesn't work.

If people are sincerely interested in unschooling, you can print them
off some articles or direct them to John Holt's books. Then, you can
have a conversation about it.


Robin B.

Ren Allen

~~Lost 4 pounds the first weekend worrying. I've decided to fight the battle an let it go where it may, though money to fight will be a huge issue.~~

I personally think it's fine and great to "fly under the radar" so to speak, but you're no longer under ANY radar. Once you are being harassed, why on EARTH would you refuse to sign an intent to homeschool? That is WAY less invasive than what other options can happen. There is a well-publicized case about children being taken away from parents (still legally under state control even though they are living at home) in the state of PA I believe.

Anyway, I really can't see for the life of me how signing an intent to homeschool is that big of a deal when you consider the consequences to your children's peace and happiness. It's one thing to fight the state if your children aren't at risk, it's entirely selfish in my opinion to put them at risk for your own ethics.

Ren
radicalunschooling.blogspot.com

Anne

LOL!! I think I belong here!!
Thanks for the welcome every one!

Anne
>
> Being confident in what you do, confident in your children's learning
> is the best defense. If people want to discuss it in an argumentative
> way, you can say "I appreciate what you're saying. I'll give that some
> thought. Please pass the bean dip" or "We're doing this as long as it
> works for us. When it doesn't, we'll do something different. Please
> pass the bean dip."
>
> My husband, when asked about socialization (and was told that our dd
> should go to school to learn to deal with bullies) said, with
> irony,"Oh, we don't worry about that. Once a week, I take her into the
> bathroom and beat her up for her lunch money." That stopped the
> conversation dead and people moved on.
>
> Humor is always good. Deflection works well. Arguing your point
> usually doesn't work.
>
> If people are sincerely interested in unschooling, you can print them
> off some articles or direct them to John Holt's books. Then, you can
> have a conversation about it.
>
>
> Robin B.
>

Robin Bentley

>
> I think when making the choice to enroll with the state or not there
> is a lot of things to be taken into consideration. You are
> jeopardizing your right to homeschool and your children's right to
> be home. You could be prosecuted, jailed, deemed neglectful, and
> your children could be sent to school, and worse case scenario taken
> from you. Please ask yourself if this "chance" is all worth it.
> Ask yourself, are these risks worth your civil disobedience?

When parents put their philosophies (i.e. vegetarianism,
environmentalism, political activism, etc.) ahead of the happiness and
safety of their children, it's not a good thing.
>
>
> Before you minimize the risk, do some research. Find out EXACTLY
> what your legal risks are. Some states are very strict and
> prosecute and some are not when it comes to "non-enrollers". This
> has nothing to do with how strict the laws are either.
>
> Put it this way, if I ever thought I was jeopardizing my ability to
> have my children home with me or jeopardizing their futures in some
> way, then I would enroll straight away. There are times when
> subjecting children to a yearly test would be better.

Yes, that's for sure. It's not a fight I would even consider, because
the consequences would be too disruptive and harmful.

In my state, we *must* declare our intention to homeschool and test or
assess annually, according to the law. However, prosecution is pretty
much non-existent. So people generally do what they want. However,
even die-hard "under the radar" folks review that decision now and
again to protect their children.
>
>
> I also don't know if everyone here is aware of "kid watch", but
> there are posters all over schools and ads in newspapers with 800
> numbers that anyone can call if they suspect your child isn't
> getting a proper education. I think someone called the number on me
> recently while my son had a black eye. My local head start program
> showed up on my front doorstep with no explanation.

Sorry to hear that this happened, Heather. Everything okay, now?

Robin B.
>

Debra Rossing

I have often found that a polite Why? Said with a small smile and a look
of "please, do tell me more about this" Stops most people in their
tracks...Those who persist are met with "Oh really? Why?" continuing the
polite look and tone but moving gradually to the look you'd give someone
who is just not quite all there and is missing the point but you're
going to humor them anyway. Most folks get the hint and/or actually stop
and think about their preconceptions - for instance, my aunt asked "But
doesn't he have to go to school to learn to read?" I politely (she is
after all the matriarch of that side of the family) said "Why?" Of
course, since I know her well I knew that she knew that her son, my dad
(her brother), and I had all been reading BEFORE starting school. A
polite why stopped her in her tracks and she realized that school and
reading did not necessarily go together. She asked a lot more questions
but they were of the seriously interested variety regarding how the laws
worked, what we planned to do, and so on. That was some 8 years ago
(before DS was even school age) and she's our biggest 'fan' now - and
wishes she could have homeschooled her son as well. Oh and FWIW for the
first 5 or 6 years (since we were on this path by the time DS was taking
his first breath) we just said "we plan to homeschool" and left it at
that. We never used the word unschooling outside of the unschooling
community (mostly online at that point). Then we started using the two
interchangeably - "We homeschool" and "We're going to an unschooling
conference" By then, the family and close friends could SEE what we're
doing and that it was not neglectful but rather was even MORE involved
and attentive. That's when we started using the word "unschooling" -
though with random folks (hairdresser, store clerk, etc) we still just
say "homeschooling" and if pressed on what we do, use terms like "whole
life learning" to try to convey the encompassing nature of learning as
part of real life rather than "un" anything which seems to just
automatically flip a switch in some people's heads. Or, as DS told
someone once, he "Learns by doing stuff"



--Deb


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Faith Void

Hi. We live in a small (pop 500) town in PA. It is rural but not terribly
far from a city or two (an hour or two hours). There are tons of home
schoolers around but they are all school at homers or do public cyber
school. I have learned to find common ground with a few (a very few). I also
embrace my "freak" and frequently let my freak flag fly, as do my kids. None
us us mind being wierd.

Most importantly I have learned to expand my neighborhood. A wise women once
told me that my unschooling neighbors may live 4-5 hours away. I found them!
We go to conferences and non-cons and gatherings and we are even planning
our own :-) I have begun to find awesome people that share the very
principles we live by. BUT they don't live next door and they don't live in
the next town over...We travel quite a bit, even with baby.

We also have a lot of sucess doing the things we love and finding cool
interesting people through that. My kids got into SCA a few months ago and
we are meeting cool local people. My dd works at a cat rescue and finds cool
people. These people don't unschool but they see my kids as regular ol'
aesome humans. I don't have to talk about what we do.

I tend not to hang out with other homeschoolers as I really don't consider
us such. It can be really hard. It can be really lonely. That's when I make
plans to go to SC or NC or VT or OH...and hook up with the amazing families
I have met online or at cons.

Faith

Faith

On Mon, Apr 20, 2009 at 6:48 PM, Anne <maiacovone@...> wrote:

>
>
> Hey there,
>
> I found this group while I was surfing the web and thought it would be one
> I'd like to be a part of. I live in a small town where there are a handful
> of homeschoolers but all are radically into public school at home. We are
> definitely not that! I've been schooling my kids at home for 6 years and
> have tried the curriculum route, but it isn't ideal.We are unschoolers at
> heart. But when no one else around you is, you are considered a FREAK ! Or
> at least they just think you're one brick short of a load! Anyway, looking
> for support.
>
> Thanks
> Anne
>
>

--
http://faithvoid.blogspot.com/
www.bearthmama.com


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Faith Void

> Yep- or they think you are a bad parent. Sometimes, I even hide the truth
from my mom. I get so sick of her asking, "did you do school today?" I have
tried to explain that we learn every day, but people just don't get it.

This is not just a thought for some. We were turned in last month to a
hotline because someone thinks we are such bad parents that our kid (the
younger 9-yr old) can't "read". We are under investigation and threatened
with prosecution because we failed to register our intent to homeschool
because we are so adamantly opposed to testing - which is mandated. There
are MANY, MANY people who fly under the radar, but we were singled out. The
DHS worker doesn't want to do anything about it, but has to see if the
prosecuting attorney wants to do anything. It has been extremely stressful.
But, we refuse to follow a law which infringes on our most basic rights to
privacy and to parent and educate our kids the way we think is best. MOST of
the homeschoolers around here that we are close to think we are CRAZY and
give us no support. They think it doesn't matter just to take the test. I
say that all of them have stressed for weeks about the test and that the
government has no right to test my kids over things I am not "studying" with
them and then have the results that could someday be used to enact laws that
make my right to educated illegal again. Only 2 years ago those test results
were used to put kids back in school if they didn't get a good enough grade!
And, they only tested half the grades they do now. So, you can't tell me it
doesn't matter.

***I live in PA. We have a lot of laws and a lot of stuff to do to comply. I
am an anarchist. I believe that the state shouldn't control what we do. I
still follow the compliance of law as they will jail me and take my
children. I put my children's need to have me as a parent and their need to
have the choice to be at home over my political ideals. In PA they really do
jail you or take your kids. I would never put my kids through that!
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=--=

We KNOW our 12 year old didn't read much until she was 10. So, we have a
basis to believe that our 9-year old will follow suit. But, he would not be
able to even take the test now, let alone do well on something so foreign to
his interests and talents at this point in his life.

***I don't believe that your child is obligated to know how to read at any
age. There are other ways to prove that he is being "educated" or that
"learning is taking place".
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-==-=-=-=-=-=-=-==-=-=-=-=-

We are determined to hold out - though we could sign the intent and be done
with the investigation - or put them in private school, where the law is
unequal and doesn't require testing (inequality is against the 14th
Ammendment).

***What will that prove? What consequences does that hold for your children?
How is school better for them than being home and complying with the laws?
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-==-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-==-=-=-=-=-=-

I came from FREE states until we moved here last year. Another friend
thought we were silly for worrying and has never registered or tested or
been in trouble. So, it was rather shocking. But, I am believing that the
prosecuting attorney knows the reality of what people do and has bigger fish
to fry. But, the law was tested in 1988 and the people lost on every count
in the Supreme Court. Nevertheless, some things have changed since then,
including the fact that the tests are not used to put kids back in school.
So, we are hopeful the Attorney won't pursue it - but still want to work to
change the law and have it repealed. Better yet, I'd like homeschoolers to
fall out of the Education Law just like the Private schools so that they are
not under those laws at all.

***I can understand that you feel shocked but now it is reality. What can
you do to create a safe life with your children at home?
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-==-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

The HSLDA is not at all friendly to those who chose civil liberties over
laws. And, they are biased toward religious reasons, which means they help
enact laws which are actually harmful to those who simply CHOOSE a different
philosophy and way because the laws they help enact are only useful if you
belong to a recognized religious sect that says they oppose certain
regulations due to religeous belief. Yet, religious belief is anything you
hold dear and with deep conviction - but the law doesn't see that.

I've contacted the ACLU, but no response.

Lost 4 pounds the first weekend worrying. I've decided to fight the battle
and let it go where it may, though money to fight will be a huge issue.

***WHY? It seems like you have a lot to lose and that by law they are in the
"right".
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

The law says prosecution, jail, or taking the kids away. I seriously doubt
the latter - but I don't want a record either - but this is a just fight. We
have never believed in year-end, course-end tests - even though my husband
was an educator. He only did it because it was required - but he left that
world because he couldn't take how he wasn't allowed to help the kids learn.

***How can you not believe in them if they are reality? You choose not to
comply. There are consequences for non-compliance. There are other ways to
work with the compliance laws. There are other ways to fight the system.
Ways that don't put your children in jeopardy.

Faith


--
http://faithvoid.blogspot.com/
www.bearthmama.com


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]