Bad superior attitude
Ren
"I did mention to Renee's dad that there is a way to play Musical Chairs that
is non-competitive and every kid ends up laughing instead of crying, but got
a few "what is the matter with her" looks. Oh well."
I've gotten that kind of response too...it's so annoying.
We play the cooperative musical chairs also, if we even play organized games at a party. The adults, when told about our cooperative version, smiled wanly and said "Oh, how interesting", or "You're so funny Ren" with a look on their face like "poor addled liberal".
Interestingly enough, the kids that come to our parties always go home talking about how much fun they had. We don't have tears, or anyone feeling left out, what is so weird about THAT?
This competition driven society is just plain sick in my opinion.
One time, we had prizes. The children all played cooperative musical chairs and then everyone picked a prize! They were all SO shocked when I told them all to go pick something....like they weren't sure I was for real. After each and every game (I think there were two or three) everyone picked an item from the box. I loved the looks on their faces.
It was dollar store stuff, but I tried to pick things I knew they'd all like....teapots, cars, notepads etc...
These days, the kids come up with their own games,usually involving hiding or the woods/creek behind our house. And the friends we have are either home/unschooled or schooled kids that know how we operate.:)
As to Renee's sexual interest...that all sounds normal for her age, what is NOT normal or healthy is her desire to control other human beings to the extent of ignoring their boundaries. But it sounds normal for HER house. Yuck.
I applaud you for dealing with this family, I don't know if I'd have the fortitude in your position.
I don't think there's anything wrong with limiting toxic people in your life...that isn't snobbery, it's sanity.
Ren
Learn about unschooling at:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingbasics/
is non-competitive and every kid ends up laughing instead of crying, but got
a few "what is the matter with her" looks. Oh well."
I've gotten that kind of response too...it's so annoying.
We play the cooperative musical chairs also, if we even play organized games at a party. The adults, when told about our cooperative version, smiled wanly and said "Oh, how interesting", or "You're so funny Ren" with a look on their face like "poor addled liberal".
Interestingly enough, the kids that come to our parties always go home talking about how much fun they had. We don't have tears, or anyone feeling left out, what is so weird about THAT?
This competition driven society is just plain sick in my opinion.
One time, we had prizes. The children all played cooperative musical chairs and then everyone picked a prize! They were all SO shocked when I told them all to go pick something....like they weren't sure I was for real. After each and every game (I think there were two or three) everyone picked an item from the box. I loved the looks on their faces.
It was dollar store stuff, but I tried to pick things I knew they'd all like....teapots, cars, notepads etc...
These days, the kids come up with their own games,usually involving hiding or the woods/creek behind our house. And the friends we have are either home/unschooled or schooled kids that know how we operate.:)
As to Renee's sexual interest...that all sounds normal for her age, what is NOT normal or healthy is her desire to control other human beings to the extent of ignoring their boundaries. But it sounds normal for HER house. Yuck.
I applaud you for dealing with this family, I don't know if I'd have the fortitude in your position.
I don't think there's anything wrong with limiting toxic people in your life...that isn't snobbery, it's sanity.
Ren
Learn about unschooling at:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingbasics/
April M
It's so good to hear others that like the non-competitive games!! I've never
liked group games that only allow one 'winner', even as a kid....and two of
my kids don't like losing in groups. They don't have a problem with winning
and losing at board games...just group games like musical chairs and such.
I instituted a new tradition at our church. I love our church...but I'm
continually challenging the 'way it's always done' mentality. Piñatas are
fun...but I hate the run and grab all you can method. So I insisted on
everyone grabbing what they can and adding it to a big bag. The older kids
were much more likely to let the younger kids 'find' some of the treasure to
add to the bag since it wouldn't take away from their portion. When all the
treats and treasures are scooped up, the adults or older teens divide the
loot evenly into smaller bags for everyone. The adults thought I was
crazy...but when it was all over, the kids were happy and content. After
seeing this the other adults are like "Wow, what a great idea....." We are
still working on some of the other games they want to play...there seems to
be a need to 'teach them how to lose' and 'teach them they can't win every
time'. As if that won't happen in the course of everyday life. I'd much
rather let them all work together and have fun. My kids always have the
option of sitting out if they don't want to play so it's not a big
deal...but little by little, I challenge others to look at the world a bit
differently. They may never agree with me, but they do respect our choices.
~April
Mom to Kate-17, Lisa-15, Karl-13, & Ben-8.
*REACH Homeschool Group, an inclusive group meeting throughout Oakland
County.. http://www.homeschoolingonashoestring.com/REACH_home.html
*Michigan Youth Theater...Acting On Our Dreams...
<http://www.michiganyouththeater.org/>
"It must be remembered that the purpose of education is not to fill the
minds of students with facts... it is to teach them to think." ~~ Robert
Hutchins
-----Original Message-----
From: Ren [mailto:starsuncloud@...]
Sent: Wednesday, July 07, 2004 8:55 AM
To: [email protected]
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Bad superior attitude
"I did mention to Renee's dad that there is a way to play Musical Chairs
that
is non-competitive and every kid ends up laughing instead of crying, but
got
a few "what is the matter with her" looks. Oh well."
I've gotten that kind of response too...it's so annoying.
We play the cooperative musical chairs also, if we even play organized
games at a party. The adults, when told about our cooperative version,
smiled wanly and said "Oh, how interesting", or "You're so funny Ren" with a
look on their face like "poor addled liberal".
Interestingly enough, the kids that come to our parties always go home
talking about how much fun they had. We don't have tears, or anyone feeling
left out, what is so weird about THAT?
This competition driven society is just plain sick in my opinion.
One time, we had prizes. The children all played cooperative musical
chairs and then everyone picked a prize! They were all SO shocked when I
told them all to go pick something....like they weren't sure I was for real.
After each and every game (I think there were two or three) everyone picked
an item from the box. I loved the looks on their faces.
It was dollar store stuff, but I tried to pick things I knew they'd all
like....teapots, cars, notepads etc...
These days, the kids come up with their own games,usually involving hiding
or the woods/creek behind our house. And the friends we have are either
home/unschooled or schooled kids that know how we operate.:)
As to Renee's sexual interest...that all sounds normal for her age, what
is NOT normal or healthy is her desire to control other human beings to the
extent of ignoring their boundaries. But it sounds normal for HER house.
Yuck.
I applaud you for dealing with this family, I don't know if I'd have the
fortitude in your position.
I don't think there's anything wrong with limiting toxic people in your
life...that isn't snobbery, it's sanity.
Ren
Learn about unschooling at:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingbasics/
Yahoo! Groups Sponsor
ADVERTISEMENT
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
--
Yahoo! Groups Links
a.. To visit your group on the web, go to:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingbasics/
b.. To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
[email protected]
c.. Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms of Service.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
liked group games that only allow one 'winner', even as a kid....and two of
my kids don't like losing in groups. They don't have a problem with winning
and losing at board games...just group games like musical chairs and such.
I instituted a new tradition at our church. I love our church...but I'm
continually challenging the 'way it's always done' mentality. Piñatas are
fun...but I hate the run and grab all you can method. So I insisted on
everyone grabbing what they can and adding it to a big bag. The older kids
were much more likely to let the younger kids 'find' some of the treasure to
add to the bag since it wouldn't take away from their portion. When all the
treats and treasures are scooped up, the adults or older teens divide the
loot evenly into smaller bags for everyone. The adults thought I was
crazy...but when it was all over, the kids were happy and content. After
seeing this the other adults are like "Wow, what a great idea....." We are
still working on some of the other games they want to play...there seems to
be a need to 'teach them how to lose' and 'teach them they can't win every
time'. As if that won't happen in the course of everyday life. I'd much
rather let them all work together and have fun. My kids always have the
option of sitting out if they don't want to play so it's not a big
deal...but little by little, I challenge others to look at the world a bit
differently. They may never agree with me, but they do respect our choices.
~April
Mom to Kate-17, Lisa-15, Karl-13, & Ben-8.
*REACH Homeschool Group, an inclusive group meeting throughout Oakland
County.. http://www.homeschoolingonashoestring.com/REACH_home.html
*Michigan Youth Theater...Acting On Our Dreams...
<http://www.michiganyouththeater.org/>
"It must be remembered that the purpose of education is not to fill the
minds of students with facts... it is to teach them to think." ~~ Robert
Hutchins
-----Original Message-----
From: Ren [mailto:starsuncloud@...]
Sent: Wednesday, July 07, 2004 8:55 AM
To: [email protected]
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Bad superior attitude
"I did mention to Renee's dad that there is a way to play Musical Chairs
that
is non-competitive and every kid ends up laughing instead of crying, but
got
a few "what is the matter with her" looks. Oh well."
I've gotten that kind of response too...it's so annoying.
We play the cooperative musical chairs also, if we even play organized
games at a party. The adults, when told about our cooperative version,
smiled wanly and said "Oh, how interesting", or "You're so funny Ren" with a
look on their face like "poor addled liberal".
Interestingly enough, the kids that come to our parties always go home
talking about how much fun they had. We don't have tears, or anyone feeling
left out, what is so weird about THAT?
This competition driven society is just plain sick in my opinion.
One time, we had prizes. The children all played cooperative musical
chairs and then everyone picked a prize! They were all SO shocked when I
told them all to go pick something....like they weren't sure I was for real.
After each and every game (I think there were two or three) everyone picked
an item from the box. I loved the looks on their faces.
It was dollar store stuff, but I tried to pick things I knew they'd all
like....teapots, cars, notepads etc...
These days, the kids come up with their own games,usually involving hiding
or the woods/creek behind our house. And the friends we have are either
home/unschooled or schooled kids that know how we operate.:)
As to Renee's sexual interest...that all sounds normal for her age, what
is NOT normal or healthy is her desire to control other human beings to the
extent of ignoring their boundaries. But it sounds normal for HER house.
Yuck.
I applaud you for dealing with this family, I don't know if I'd have the
fortitude in your position.
I don't think there's anything wrong with limiting toxic people in your
life...that isn't snobbery, it's sanity.
Ren
Learn about unschooling at:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingbasics/
Yahoo! Groups Sponsor
ADVERTISEMENT
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
--
Yahoo! Groups Links
a.. To visit your group on the web, go to:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingbasics/
b.. To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
[email protected]
c.. Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms of Service.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 7/7/2004 8:53:16 AM Central Standard Time,
abmorris23@... writes:
. Piñatas are
fun...but I hate the run and grab all you can method. So I insisted on
everyone grabbing what they can and adding it to a big bag.
~~~
That's a good idea, too. What I did with our pinata is put the candy
pre-sorted into containers inside the pinata, just enough for everyone at the
party. (They were actually small plastic pumpkins.) The kids (all unschooled)
were kind of shocked when they saw what came out, but they quickly understood
that if they picked up more than one than someone wouldn't get any candy.
I really felt like a spoil-sport for doing it that way, and I was afraid
someone would say it wasn't fun that way. But my son, the one who always gets
pushed away from displays at the zoo by crowds of school kids, is also the one
who gets the least candy from the pinata. He's just not going to be
aggressive and act greedy to get the most candy. (Nice guys finish last, you know?)
So it worked out.
Karen
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
abmorris23@... writes:
. Piñatas are
fun...but I hate the run and grab all you can method. So I insisted on
everyone grabbing what they can and adding it to a big bag.
~~~
That's a good idea, too. What I did with our pinata is put the candy
pre-sorted into containers inside the pinata, just enough for everyone at the
party. (They were actually small plastic pumpkins.) The kids (all unschooled)
were kind of shocked when they saw what came out, but they quickly understood
that if they picked up more than one than someone wouldn't get any candy.
I really felt like a spoil-sport for doing it that way, and I was afraid
someone would say it wasn't fun that way. But my son, the one who always gets
pushed away from displays at the zoo by crowds of school kids, is also the one
who gets the least candy from the pinata. He's just not going to be
aggressive and act greedy to get the most candy. (Nice guys finish last, you know?)
So it worked out.
Karen
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
earthmothergypsy
>I don't think there's anything wrong with limiting toxic people inyour life...that isn't snobbery, it's sanity.
>Ren, this is so true. I feel the same way and we live this way, even
> Ren
if it does limit the number of "friends" in our life.
~Amanda
[email protected]
In a message dated 7/7/2004 8:26:05 AM US Eastern Standard Time,
starsuncloud@... writes:
liberating and a total stress reducer to know you dont ''have to''put up with
certain people or behaviors that are not healthy ..
June
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
starsuncloud@... writes:
> I don't think there's anything wrong with limiting toxic people in yourhow true,,i didnt ''get that'' till i was WAY into my 30's...pity too..it is
> life...that isn't snobbery, it's sanity.
>
> Ren
>
liberating and a total stress reducer to know you dont ''have to''put up with
certain people or behaviors that are not healthy ..
June
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Jennifer Altenbach
What we did at a recent piñata party was to give all the adults little
bags of candy to throw around just as the piñata broke and kids started
to scatter, effectively increasing the area of candy coverage by a lot.
It worked really well. There were no tears and only the bigger kids
seemed to notice the trick and they didnt care.
Jenny
<<That's a good idea, too. What I did with our pinata is put the candy
pre-sorted into containers inside the pinata, just enough for everyone
at the
party. (They were actually small plastic pumpkins.) The kids (all
unschooled)
were kind of shocked when they saw what came out, but they quickly
understood
that if they picked up more than one than someone wouldn't get any
candy.
I really felt like a spoil-sport for doing it that way, and I was afraid
someone would say it wasn't fun that way. But my son, the one who
always gets
pushed away from displays at the zoo by crowds of school kids, is also
the one
who gets the least candy from the pinata. He's just not going to be
aggressive and act greedy to get the most candy. (Nice guys finish
last, you know?)>>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
bags of candy to throw around just as the piñata broke and kids started
to scatter, effectively increasing the area of candy coverage by a lot.
It worked really well. There were no tears and only the bigger kids
seemed to notice the trick and they didnt care.
Jenny
<<That's a good idea, too. What I did with our pinata is put the candy
pre-sorted into containers inside the pinata, just enough for everyone
at the
party. (They were actually small plastic pumpkins.) The kids (all
unschooled)
were kind of shocked when they saw what came out, but they quickly
understood
that if they picked up more than one than someone wouldn't get any
candy.
I really felt like a spoil-sport for doing it that way, and I was afraid
someone would say it wasn't fun that way. But my son, the one who
always gets
pushed away from displays at the zoo by crowds of school kids, is also
the one
who gets the least candy from the pinata. He's just not going to be
aggressive and act greedy to get the most candy. (Nice guys finish
last, you know?)>>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]