children and sexuality
Maisha Khalfani
<<We are sexual creatures. And it is
natural for us to want to explore that side of us.>>
What if the person you want to "experiment" with is your sibling??? Two of my children were "experimenting" the other night. No genital areas were touched, and there was no kissing because, as my 7 yr old put it "I wasn't comfortable with that". (whew! that's a good thing! LOL) But there was touching and caressing and pecking on other parts of the body. I asked them about it (in a very non-judgmental way) and my daughter said she wanted to see what it was like to have a boyfriend or a husband. I explained that while she loved her brother, he couldn't help her to understand that because he was her brother, and she couldn't feel for her brother the way she would feel for a boyfriend or a husband.
Now this is the second time that I've found them playing this way, and it makes me apprehensive about them watching anything more than they already see.
Has anyone else's children done this? I mean, I did it too ---- with friends, not siblings LOL, so I'm not upset at experimentation. I just don't want my kids experimenting with each other.
Maisha
http://khalfanifamilyadventures.blogspot.com/<http://khalfanifamilyadventures.blogspot.com/>
http://www.geocities.com/maitai373/EarthSpirit.html<http://www.geocities.com/maitai373/EarthSpirit.html>
"Don't be afraid of showing affection. Be warm and tender, thoughtful and affectionate. Mankind is more helped by sympathy than by service. Love is more than money, and a kind word will give more pleasure than a present."
~ Jean Baptiste Lacordaire
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
natural for us to want to explore that side of us.>>
What if the person you want to "experiment" with is your sibling??? Two of my children were "experimenting" the other night. No genital areas were touched, and there was no kissing because, as my 7 yr old put it "I wasn't comfortable with that". (whew! that's a good thing! LOL) But there was touching and caressing and pecking on other parts of the body. I asked them about it (in a very non-judgmental way) and my daughter said she wanted to see what it was like to have a boyfriend or a husband. I explained that while she loved her brother, he couldn't help her to understand that because he was her brother, and she couldn't feel for her brother the way she would feel for a boyfriend or a husband.
Now this is the second time that I've found them playing this way, and it makes me apprehensive about them watching anything more than they already see.
Has anyone else's children done this? I mean, I did it too ---- with friends, not siblings LOL, so I'm not upset at experimentation. I just don't want my kids experimenting with each other.
Maisha
http://khalfanifamilyadventures.blogspot.com/<http://khalfanifamilyadventures.blogspot.com/>
http://www.geocities.com/maitai373/EarthSpirit.html<http://www.geocities.com/maitai373/EarthSpirit.html>
"Don't be afraid of showing affection. Be warm and tender, thoughtful and affectionate. Mankind is more helped by sympathy than by service. Love is more than money, and a kind word will give more pleasure than a present."
~ Jean Baptiste Lacordaire
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
Two of my kids experimented sexually with each other. They were
adopted as infants and very close in age. Their thoughts were that
they aren't "really" brother and sister, just legally. That was a
twist to ponder. I don't think it is an unusual thing. In fact, in
certain societies it is considered quite the norm.
But it isn't considered a "good thing" in our society and so we deal
with that.
Julie S.
adopted as infants and very close in age. Their thoughts were that
they aren't "really" brother and sister, just legally. That was a
twist to ponder. I don't think it is an unusual thing. In fact, in
certain societies it is considered quite the norm.
But it isn't considered a "good thing" in our society and so we deal
with that.
Julie S.
Joanne
--- In [email protected], "Maisha Khalfani"
<earthspirit393@...> wrote:
sexually abused before we adopted them. About six months after we
adopted them, my youngest came to me and confided that there was
sexual activity going on, initiated by my middle child and involving
all three of them. Without having to go into private details, it was
much more serious than experimenting. It changed the way we live
from that day forward. They have a lot of healing to do and we have
certain safeguards set in place in an attempt to ensure safety for
everyone.
I wasn't going to reply because what you're talking about is
probably the kind of stuff all kids do and it's normal and healthy.
In our case, it wasn't and it was a very emotional time for all of
us.
~ Joanne ~
Mom to Jacqueline (7), Shawna (10) & Cimion (13)
Adopted into our hearts October 30, 2003
http://anunschoolinglife.blogspot.com/
<earthspirit393@...> wrote:
>>>>Has anyone else's children done this?>>>>>>>Yes. My children (siblings that we adopted through foster care) were
sexually abused before we adopted them. About six months after we
adopted them, my youngest came to me and confided that there was
sexual activity going on, initiated by my middle child and involving
all three of them. Without having to go into private details, it was
much more serious than experimenting. It changed the way we live
from that day forward. They have a lot of healing to do and we have
certain safeguards set in place in an attempt to ensure safety for
everyone.
I wasn't going to reply because what you're talking about is
probably the kind of stuff all kids do and it's normal and healthy.
In our case, it wasn't and it was a very emotional time for all of
us.
~ Joanne ~
Mom to Jacqueline (7), Shawna (10) & Cimion (13)
Adopted into our hearts October 30, 2003
http://anunschoolinglife.blogspot.com/