Balancing the Age Split
[email protected]
Hi all, I am writing for some help or advice or something! My dd is 2yrs9mos,
and ds is 8yrs8mos. I am having some trouble feeling like my time is balanced
with them . Right now, it seems as though everything is very much run around
dd, and her needs, and that I am not doing such a great job of meeting my
son's needs. It is hard to go places with dd as she is very easily overstimulated
and gets kind of uncomfortable in a wild way. She is great if we stay home and
she can be naked and do what she wants to do. we are still nursing, and she
has no real sleep pattern, with one day napping, one day not. Up till midnight
sometimes, sleeping by 7pm sometimes. I really want her to do what is right
for her body, at the same time sometimes we will go for a few days where I can't
even read to ds. I have taken to turning the tv on for her so he and I can
play a game or read.
Does anyone have any suggestions or ideas? The worry is large that poor ds is
not getting what he needs to enjoy himself right now.
Thanks very much,
Nancy in BC, sad cause we are just too far from any conferences.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
and ds is 8yrs8mos. I am having some trouble feeling like my time is balanced
with them . Right now, it seems as though everything is very much run around
dd, and her needs, and that I am not doing such a great job of meeting my
son's needs. It is hard to go places with dd as she is very easily overstimulated
and gets kind of uncomfortable in a wild way. She is great if we stay home and
she can be naked and do what she wants to do. we are still nursing, and she
has no real sleep pattern, with one day napping, one day not. Up till midnight
sometimes, sleeping by 7pm sometimes. I really want her to do what is right
for her body, at the same time sometimes we will go for a few days where I can't
even read to ds. I have taken to turning the tv on for her so he and I can
play a game or read.
Does anyone have any suggestions or ideas? The worry is large that poor ds is
not getting what he needs to enjoy himself right now.
Thanks very much,
Nancy in BC, sad cause we are just too far from any conferences.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Joan Labbe & Salvatore Genovese
"Does anyone have any suggestions or ideas? The worry is large that poor ds
is
not getting what he needs to enjoy himself right now.
Thanks very much,
Nancy in BC, sad cause we are just too far from any conferences."
Hi, Nancy,
Mine are not split as far apart as yours are (currently dd 5.7 and ds 3.4),
but we went through exactly the period you are describing and I went through
a big worry phase too around the 3 year mark with ds. We didn't have the
"going out" problem so much since my daughter prefers to be at home. But my
daughter started commenting on the fact that "You spend all your time
playing with Nicky!" She even asked me to limit the time I was playing with
him! What ended up helping was a couple of things. Firstly, we talked
about it quite a bit and I acknowledged that Nicky was going through a big
phase of wanting to play with mama all the time and this was a big switch
from when he wanted to just play with his big sister all the time. I told
her I could see how difficult this was for her and I encouraged her to tell
me at the point at which she wanted to have time with me (as opposed to
waiting for me to be "free" which is what she was doing endlessly). I also
started just randomly checking in with her throughout the day, asking "How
are you doing? Is there anything you want to do with mama?" If she said
"yes", I started asking my son to wait. I'd explain that Leenie needed me
to do such and such with her right now and suggest something he could do or
invite him to join us in some way. Sometimes he'd trot off and do something
else, sometimes he'd join us, sometimes he would just choose to nurse during
these periods and I'm glad he's still nursing since that helped him wait.
Wish I could offer you help on the going out part of it, but we have the
opposite situation here - 3 year old wants to go out more often and older
child is the confirmed introvert homebody.
Joan
is
not getting what he needs to enjoy himself right now.
Thanks very much,
Nancy in BC, sad cause we are just too far from any conferences."
Hi, Nancy,
Mine are not split as far apart as yours are (currently dd 5.7 and ds 3.4),
but we went through exactly the period you are describing and I went through
a big worry phase too around the 3 year mark with ds. We didn't have the
"going out" problem so much since my daughter prefers to be at home. But my
daughter started commenting on the fact that "You spend all your time
playing with Nicky!" She even asked me to limit the time I was playing with
him! What ended up helping was a couple of things. Firstly, we talked
about it quite a bit and I acknowledged that Nicky was going through a big
phase of wanting to play with mama all the time and this was a big switch
from when he wanted to just play with his big sister all the time. I told
her I could see how difficult this was for her and I encouraged her to tell
me at the point at which she wanted to have time with me (as opposed to
waiting for me to be "free" which is what she was doing endlessly). I also
started just randomly checking in with her throughout the day, asking "How
are you doing? Is there anything you want to do with mama?" If she said
"yes", I started asking my son to wait. I'd explain that Leenie needed me
to do such and such with her right now and suggest something he could do or
invite him to join us in some way. Sometimes he'd trot off and do something
else, sometimes he'd join us, sometimes he would just choose to nurse during
these periods and I'm glad he's still nursing since that helped him wait.
Wish I could offer you help on the going out part of it, but we have the
opposite situation here - 3 year old wants to go out more often and older
child is the confirmed introvert homebody.
Joan
Sherri-Lee Pressman
Nancy. in BC??? British Columbia? Canada? ME TOO!!!! Where abouts are you?
Good to meet a fellow Canadian, maybe if we can get enough unschoolers
together we could start having our own unschooling conventions, wouldn't
that be a riot! Or at least know another person who doesn't look at you like
you have two heads when you mention homeschooling, let alone Unschooling:-)
Good to meet you!
Sherri-Lee
_____
From: LOWRIEK@... [mailto:LOWRIEK@...]
Sent: Monday, June 28, 2004 6:06 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Balancing the Age Split
Hi all, I am writing for some help or advice or something! My dd is
2yrs9mos,
and ds is 8yrs8mos. I am having some trouble feeling like my time is
balanced
with them . Right now, it seems as though everything is very much run around
dd, and her needs, and that I am not doing such a great job of meeting my
son's needs. It is hard to go places with dd as she is very easily
overstimulated
and gets kind of uncomfortable in a wild way. She is great if we stay home
and
she can be naked and do what she wants to do. we are still nursing, and she
has no real sleep pattern, with one day napping, one day not. Up till
midnight
sometimes, sleeping by 7pm sometimes. I really want her to do what is right
for her body, at the same time sometimes we will go for a few days where I
can't
even read to ds. I have taken to turning the tv on for her so he and I can
play a game or read.
Does anyone have any suggestions or ideas? The worry is large that poor ds
is
not getting what he needs to enjoy himself right now.
Thanks very much,
Nancy in BC, sad cause we are just too far from any conferences.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Good to meet a fellow Canadian, maybe if we can get enough unschoolers
together we could start having our own unschooling conventions, wouldn't
that be a riot! Or at least know another person who doesn't look at you like
you have two heads when you mention homeschooling, let alone Unschooling:-)
Good to meet you!
Sherri-Lee
_____
From: LOWRIEK@... [mailto:LOWRIEK@...]
Sent: Monday, June 28, 2004 6:06 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Balancing the Age Split
Hi all, I am writing for some help or advice or something! My dd is
2yrs9mos,
and ds is 8yrs8mos. I am having some trouble feeling like my time is
balanced
with them . Right now, it seems as though everything is very much run around
dd, and her needs, and that I am not doing such a great job of meeting my
son's needs. It is hard to go places with dd as she is very easily
overstimulated
and gets kind of uncomfortable in a wild way. She is great if we stay home
and
she can be naked and do what she wants to do. we are still nursing, and she
has no real sleep pattern, with one day napping, one day not. Up till
midnight
sometimes, sleeping by 7pm sometimes. I really want her to do what is right
for her body, at the same time sometimes we will go for a few days where I
can't
even read to ds. I have taken to turning the tv on for her so he and I can
play a game or read.
Does anyone have any suggestions or ideas? The worry is large that poor ds
is
not getting what he needs to enjoy himself right now.
Thanks very much,
Nancy in BC, sad cause we are just too far from any conferences.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 28/06/2004 19:31:52 Pacific Daylight Time,
sherri--lee@... writes:
coast or the Island for a conference, or even Alberta. Would love to hook up with
some others of our type!! There are a few families of unschoolers up here, but
it is hard to get together.
Nancy in BC
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
sherri--lee@... writes:
> Where abouts are you?Hi Sherri Lee, I am in Prince George. How about you? I would come to the
> Good to meet a fellow Canadian, maybe if we can get enough unschoolers
> together we could start having our own unschooling conventions, wouldn't
> that be a riot! Or at least know another person who doesn't look at you like
> you have two heads when you mention homeschooling, let alone Unschooling:-)
>
coast or the Island for a conference, or even Alberta. Would love to hook up with
some others of our type!! There are a few families of unschoolers up here, but
it is hard to get together.
Nancy in BC
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sherri-Lee Pressman
HI Nancy,
I am in Langley now, but was born and raised in PG. In fact my mom just left
there last year and I still have a brother there. Doubt I will be up for a
visit though.
We will have to try to get the unschooling community together, I know there
are strong homeschooling groups in BC, but haven't heard much about
unschooling here yet.
Nice to meet you,
Sherri-Lee
_____
From: LOWRIEK@... [mailto:LOWRIEK@...]
Sent: Monday, June 28, 2004 8:50 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] Nancy location OFF TOPIC
In a message dated 28/06/2004 19:31:52 Pacific Daylight Time,
sherri--lee@... writes:
coast or the Island for a conference, or even Alberta. Would love to hook up
with
some others of our type!! There are a few families of unschoolers up here,
but
it is hard to get together.
Nancy in BC
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
I am in Langley now, but was born and raised in PG. In fact my mom just left
there last year and I still have a brother there. Doubt I will be up for a
visit though.
We will have to try to get the unschooling community together, I know there
are strong homeschooling groups in BC, but haven't heard much about
unschooling here yet.
Nice to meet you,
Sherri-Lee
_____
From: LOWRIEK@... [mailto:LOWRIEK@...]
Sent: Monday, June 28, 2004 8:50 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] Nancy location OFF TOPIC
In a message dated 28/06/2004 19:31:52 Pacific Daylight Time,
sherri--lee@... writes:
> Where abouts are you?like
> Good to meet a fellow Canadian, maybe if we can get enough unschoolers
> together we could start having our own unschooling conventions, wouldn't
> that be a riot! Or at least know another person who doesn't look at you
> you have two heads when you mention homeschooling, let aloneUnschooling:-)
>Hi Sherri Lee, I am in Prince George. How about you? I would come to the
coast or the Island for a conference, or even Alberta. Would love to hook up
with
some others of our type!! There are a few families of unschoolers up here,
but
it is hard to get together.
Nancy in BC
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 6/29/2004 8:29:48 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
sherri--lee@... writes:
HI Nancy,
I am in Langley now, but was born and raised in PG. In fact my mom just left
there last year and I still have a brother there. Doubt I will be up for a
visit though.
We will have to try to get the unschooling community together, I know there
are strong homeschooling groups in BC, but haven't heard much about
unschooling here yet.Nice to meet you,
Sherri-Lee<<<<<
May I suggest a new grouP? Maybe [email protected]_
(mailto:[email protected]) ?
Go for it! "Advertise" on all the homeshcool groups in the province.
They'll come out of the woodwork! You'll have regular park days and trips and .....!
~Kelly
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
sherri--lee@... writes:
HI Nancy,
I am in Langley now, but was born and raised in PG. In fact my mom just left
there last year and I still have a brother there. Doubt I will be up for a
visit though.
We will have to try to get the unschooling community together, I know there
are strong homeschooling groups in BC, but haven't heard much about
unschooling here yet.Nice to meet you,
Sherri-Lee<<<<<
May I suggest a new grouP? Maybe [email protected]_
(mailto:[email protected]) ?
Go for it! "Advertise" on all the homeshcool groups in the province.
They'll come out of the woodwork! You'll have regular park days and trips and .....!
~Kelly
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sherri-Lee Pressman
And here I thought that was already a group and went to join it. sigh
pregnancy brain!
I am happy to start it up though. good idea!!!
I have a friend who is a homeschooler. and we have put together an outing to
a park one day a week over the summer and are passing the info on even to
non homeschoolers. Today we met a group of moms and kids and sure enough
they were all homeschoolers. What was funny to me was that they didn't know
what unschooling was! Any, my friend and I decided to continue on into the
fall and just plan a field trip one day a week through out the fall and
winter too.. so this is sounding promising!
Sherri-Lee
_____
From: kbcdlovejo@... [mailto:kbcdlovejo@...]
Sent: Tuesday, June 29, 2004 6:02 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] Nancy location OFF TOPIC
In a message dated 6/29/2004 8:29:48 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
sherri--lee@... writes:
HI Nancy,
I am in Langley now, but was born and raised in PG. In fact my mom just
left
there last year and I still have a brother there. Doubt I will be up for a
visit though.
We will have to try to get the unschooling community together, I know there
are strong homeschooling groups in BC, but haven't heard much about
unschooling here yet.Nice to meet you,
Sherri-Lee<<<<<
May I suggest a new grouP? Maybe [email protected]_
(mailto:[email protected]) ?
Go for it! "Advertise" on all the homeshcool groups in the province.
They'll come out of the woodwork! You'll have regular park days and trips
and .....!
~Kelly
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
pregnancy brain!
I am happy to start it up though. good idea!!!
I have a friend who is a homeschooler. and we have put together an outing to
a park one day a week over the summer and are passing the info on even to
non homeschoolers. Today we met a group of moms and kids and sure enough
they were all homeschoolers. What was funny to me was that they didn't know
what unschooling was! Any, my friend and I decided to continue on into the
fall and just plan a field trip one day a week through out the fall and
winter too.. so this is sounding promising!
Sherri-Lee
_____
From: kbcdlovejo@... [mailto:kbcdlovejo@...]
Sent: Tuesday, June 29, 2004 6:02 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] Nancy location OFF TOPIC
In a message dated 6/29/2004 8:29:48 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
sherri--lee@... writes:
HI Nancy,
I am in Langley now, but was born and raised in PG. In fact my mom just
left
there last year and I still have a brother there. Doubt I will be up for a
visit though.
We will have to try to get the unschooling community together, I know there
are strong homeschooling groups in BC, but haven't heard much about
unschooling here yet.Nice to meet you,
Sherri-Lee<<<<<
May I suggest a new grouP? Maybe [email protected]_
(mailto:[email protected]) ?
Go for it! "Advertise" on all the homeshcool groups in the province.
They'll come out of the woodwork! You'll have regular park days and trips
and .....!
~Kelly
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sherri-Lee Pressman
Well I hope no one minds, but I did go ahead and start the list, guess I am
committed to this unschooling thing to some level.. So if no one minds the
promotion here is the link if you are in BC and want to join:
[email protected]
Sherri-Lee:-)
_____
From: kbcdlovejo@... [mailto:kbcdlovejo@...]
Sent: Tuesday, June 29, 2004 6:02 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] Nancy location OFF TOPIC
In a message dated 6/29/2004 8:29:48 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
sherri--lee@... writes:
HI Nancy,
I am in Langley now, but was born and raised in PG. In fact my mom just
left
there last year and I still have a brother there. Doubt I will be up for a
visit though.
We will have to try to get the unschooling community together, I know there
are strong homeschooling groups in BC, but haven't heard much about
unschooling here yet.Nice to meet you,
Sherri-Lee<<<<<
May I suggest a new grouP? Maybe [email protected]_
(mailto:[email protected]) ?
Go for it! "Advertise" on all the homeshcool groups in the province.
They'll come out of the woodwork! You'll have regular park days and trips
and .....!
~Kelly
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
committed to this unschooling thing to some level.. So if no one minds the
promotion here is the link if you are in BC and want to join:
[email protected]
Sherri-Lee:-)
_____
From: kbcdlovejo@... [mailto:kbcdlovejo@...]
Sent: Tuesday, June 29, 2004 6:02 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] Nancy location OFF TOPIC
In a message dated 6/29/2004 8:29:48 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
sherri--lee@... writes:
HI Nancy,
I am in Langley now, but was born and raised in PG. In fact my mom just
left
there last year and I still have a brother there. Doubt I will be up for a
visit though.
We will have to try to get the unschooling community together, I know there
are strong homeschooling groups in BC, but haven't heard much about
unschooling here yet.Nice to meet you,
Sherri-Lee<<<<<
May I suggest a new grouP? Maybe [email protected]_
(mailto:[email protected]) ?
Go for it! "Advertise" on all the homeshcool groups in the province.
They'll come out of the woodwork! You'll have regular park days and trips
and .....!
~Kelly
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 29/06/2004 18:36:06 Pacific Daylight Time,
kbcdlovejo@... writes:
Nancy in BC
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
kbcdlovejo@... writes:
> Go for it! "Advertise" on all the homeshcool groups in the province.Thanks a lot, Kelly, good idea!!
> They'll come out of the woodwork! You'll have regular park days and trips
> and .....!
>
> ~Kelly
>
>
Nancy in BC
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