RE: [unschoolingbasics] Digest Number 848- intro/ concerns
Misty Felner
<Although this might seem like a lot of topics in one, really, the question
is one: Where do I fit if I don't believe in school (at home or in an
institution), but I do believe in some limits and education about food,
television, etc.?>
Christie,
I feel like you and I must be kindred spirits. I'm still catching up on
posts and haven't read if you've gotten any responses, but when I read your
post I felt I needed to respond right away. I am in the exact place as you
with my 2.5 yo dd. Although we don't have the 5 color rule about food. I
just don't keep the things I don't want her to eat in the house nor do I or
my dh eat them in front of her. On the rare occasion that we're having a
special treat, say coffee I explain to her that it's something grown-ups
drink that's not very really healthy and when she gets older she's welcome
to try it. She's perfectly fine with that. She doesn't eat cookies except
for Earth's Best, her idea of candy is carob chips and ice cream is frozen
pureed bananas and other fruit. Sometimes we go up to a week at a time with
her not even asking to watch TV. We even have a scheduled bedtime routine.
We found it worked for us, b/c dd would get really cranky if she didn't go
to bed. When I first joined this group, pretty recently actually, I think
in the last month. I wasn't even sure what unschooling was exactly and
whether or not it was the approach I was going to choose. Now I realize
that our AP life style leads right into unschooling. I consider myself an
unschooler and those that allow freedom in everything radical unschoolers.
I'm sure as our children get older we will both allow our children more
freedom in their choices when it comes to food, bed, etc. At this age I
look at those things in the same way as I look health and safety.
Misty
is one: Where do I fit if I don't believe in school (at home or in an
institution), but I do believe in some limits and education about food,
television, etc.?>
Christie,
I feel like you and I must be kindred spirits. I'm still catching up on
posts and haven't read if you've gotten any responses, but when I read your
post I felt I needed to respond right away. I am in the exact place as you
with my 2.5 yo dd. Although we don't have the 5 color rule about food. I
just don't keep the things I don't want her to eat in the house nor do I or
my dh eat them in front of her. On the rare occasion that we're having a
special treat, say coffee I explain to her that it's something grown-ups
drink that's not very really healthy and when she gets older she's welcome
to try it. She's perfectly fine with that. She doesn't eat cookies except
for Earth's Best, her idea of candy is carob chips and ice cream is frozen
pureed bananas and other fruit. Sometimes we go up to a week at a time with
her not even asking to watch TV. We even have a scheduled bedtime routine.
We found it worked for us, b/c dd would get really cranky if she didn't go
to bed. When I first joined this group, pretty recently actually, I think
in the last month. I wasn't even sure what unschooling was exactly and
whether or not it was the approach I was going to choose. Now I realize
that our AP life style leads right into unschooling. I consider myself an
unschooler and those that allow freedom in everything radical unschoolers.
I'm sure as our children get older we will both allow our children more
freedom in their choices when it comes to food, bed, etc. At this age I
look at those things in the same way as I look health and safety.
Misty
[email protected]
-----Original Message-----
From: Misty Felner <misty@...>
On the rare occasion that we're having a
special treat, say coffee I explain to her that it's something grown-ups
drink that's not very really healthy and when she gets older she's
welcome
to try it. She's perfectly fine with that.
-=-==-
If it's not very healthy, why are you modelling unhealthy behavior and
then forbidding her to partake? Why does she need to be older to try it?
-=-=-=-=-
I'm sure as our children get older we will both allow our children more
freedom in their choices when it comes to food, bed, etc. At this age I
look at those things in the same way as I look health and safety.
-=-=-=-
The longer you keep them from having free choice, the harder it will
for them to make wise choices. *Helping* them make choices is better
than giving them no choice at all.
~Kelly
Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://liveandlearnconference.org
From: Misty Felner <misty@...>
On the rare occasion that we're having a
special treat, say coffee I explain to her that it's something grown-ups
drink that's not very really healthy and when she gets older she's
welcome
to try it. She's perfectly fine with that.
-=-==-
If it's not very healthy, why are you modelling unhealthy behavior and
then forbidding her to partake? Why does she need to be older to try it?
-=-=-=-=-
I'm sure as our children get older we will both allow our children more
freedom in their choices when it comes to food, bed, etc. At this age I
look at those things in the same way as I look health and safety.
-=-=-=-
The longer you keep them from having free choice, the harder it will
for them to make wise choices. *Helping* them make choices is better
than giving them no choice at all.
~Kelly
Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://liveandlearnconference.org
Pampered Chef Michelle
On 4/16/06, kbcdlovejo@... <kbcdlovejo@...> wrote:
(he's in computers and if anyone knows computer guys they are caffeine
junkies). I'm a tea drinker myself. Coffee is too strong and bitter to
me. Our children have been naturally curious about coffee and so we have
always let them try when they ask. Most children also find coffee to strong
and bitter (and hot). Others don't. Our children do know that coffee
contains caffeine and that caffeine can keep you awake when you don't want
to be. They know that there is decaffeinated coffee which has significantly
less caffiene in it than regular coffee (or Dan's "Deadman's Reach" blend
that he likes so much) Coffee is just another drink. Just like colas. I
think colas are much worse for children than coffee, especially with all the
high fructose corn syrup and added flavorings and preservatives! Why my
children have learned is that while colas may taste good, they don't quench
a thirst, make you feel sluggish (and sometimes sluggish and jittery at the
same time) and are expensive. They prefer to drink water. Not because I
have told them that cola is bad but because they've discovered that they
don't like the effect of colas on their bodies.
Consider the message you send to your children about food. If it is bad for
them it's bad for you as well. :)
--
Michelle
Independent Kitchen Consultant #413652
The Pampered Chef
850-474-0817
http://www.pamperedchef.biz/michellelr
Ask me how you can save 60% on some of our most favorite products!
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>ROFL I thought the exact same thing. My co-parent is a major coffee addict
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Misty Felner <misty@...>
>
>
> On the rare occasion that we're having a
> special treat, say coffee I explain to her that it's something grown-ups
> drink that's not very really healthy and when she gets older she's
> welcome
> to try it. She's perfectly fine with that.
>
> -=-==-
>
> If it's not very healthy, why are you modelling unhealthy behavior and
> then forbidding her to partake? Why does she need to be older to try it?
>
> -=-=-=-=-
(he's in computers and if anyone knows computer guys they are caffeine
junkies). I'm a tea drinker myself. Coffee is too strong and bitter to
me. Our children have been naturally curious about coffee and so we have
always let them try when they ask. Most children also find coffee to strong
and bitter (and hot). Others don't. Our children do know that coffee
contains caffeine and that caffeine can keep you awake when you don't want
to be. They know that there is decaffeinated coffee which has significantly
less caffiene in it than regular coffee (or Dan's "Deadman's Reach" blend
that he likes so much) Coffee is just another drink. Just like colas. I
think colas are much worse for children than coffee, especially with all the
high fructose corn syrup and added flavorings and preservatives! Why my
children have learned is that while colas may taste good, they don't quench
a thirst, make you feel sluggish (and sometimes sluggish and jittery at the
same time) and are expensive. They prefer to drink water. Not because I
have told them that cola is bad but because they've discovered that they
don't like the effect of colas on their bodies.
Consider the message you send to your children about food. If it is bad for
them it's bad for you as well. :)
--
Michelle
Independent Kitchen Consultant #413652
The Pampered Chef
850-474-0817
http://www.pamperedchef.biz/michellelr
Ask me how you can save 60% on some of our most favorite products!
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sylvia Toyama
On the rare occasion that we're having a special treat, say coffee I explain to her that it's something grown-ups drink that's not very really healthy and when she gets older she's
welcome to try it.
*****
For the record -- and I'm not a coffee-drinker -- there's no real proof that coffee is unhealthy. There has been some research that coffee may actually be healthy for some people. A recent study in Japan found that regular coffee consumption correlates with lower rates of Parkinson's disease.
It's rare that something people routinely consume is completely unhealthy, and when kids later find out that the 'unhealthy' substance parents limited and warned about doesn't harm them, parents can quickly lose credibility. Once kids learn parents misrepresented the truth, all bets are off as to whether or not they take that advice.
Sylvia, Mom to
Will, 21 and out on his own
Andy, almost 10 and Dan, 5
Let the beauty you love be what you do -- Rumi
---------------------------------
Yahoo! Messenger with Voice. Make PC-to-Phone Calls to the US (and 30+ countries) for 2¢/min or less.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
welcome to try it.
*****
For the record -- and I'm not a coffee-drinker -- there's no real proof that coffee is unhealthy. There has been some research that coffee may actually be healthy for some people. A recent study in Japan found that regular coffee consumption correlates with lower rates of Parkinson's disease.
It's rare that something people routinely consume is completely unhealthy, and when kids later find out that the 'unhealthy' substance parents limited and warned about doesn't harm them, parents can quickly lose credibility. Once kids learn parents misrepresented the truth, all bets are off as to whether or not they take that advice.
Sylvia, Mom to
Will, 21 and out on his own
Andy, almost 10 and Dan, 5
Let the beauty you love be what you do -- Rumi
---------------------------------
Yahoo! Messenger with Voice. Make PC-to-Phone Calls to the US (and 30+ countries) for 2¢/min or less.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]