Ellen's introduction and questions
Ren Allen
"I have requested the Home Study Packet from my state (Vermont) and
I'd like to try unschooling him."
If you'd like to try unschooling him, then you can just throw that
Home Study packet away!:) They won't give you the information you need
for unschooling, but homeschooling, which is repeating the very worst
parts of school usually.
Start by remembering how it feels to be a child that is fascinated
with things. Start by trusting that your child is fascinated by many
things (or use to be) and that fascination will lead to the very best
kind of learning in the world. Start by being your child's advocate,
his partner and helping him get the things he loves and desires.
Start by making today's focus all about joy, all about your
relationship with him and about how to make the moment glorious.
Start by forgetting that school exists and remembering how to LIVE.:)
Live deeply, richly and passionately and you will be unschooling.
Live with intention, with determination and self-knowledge.
Good living leads to learning. So focus on making LIFE wonderful and
learning will begin to unfold naturally.
Start today by declaring this very moment a vacation. You're on
vacation from "shoulds", "have to's" and requirements. You're on
vacation from school with all of it's toxic trappings. You're on
vacation from seeing your child as "ADHD". He is who he is, a
perfectly whole and capable human being and in this very moment you
can choose to see him as such.
This vacation you're beginning today is about finding your joy again.
As both of you do the things that bring joy into your home and spirit,
you will feel the chains of school loosen, the bonds begin to break.
As you connect as mother and child over your interests, you will see
how beautiful learning can truly be. As you begin to truly LIVE,
you'll wonder at those that stay trapped within the box of school and
never choose to fly free.
Grasp your freedom today, it's calling you......
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
I'd like to try unschooling him."
If you'd like to try unschooling him, then you can just throw that
Home Study packet away!:) They won't give you the information you need
for unschooling, but homeschooling, which is repeating the very worst
parts of school usually.
Start by remembering how it feels to be a child that is fascinated
with things. Start by trusting that your child is fascinated by many
things (or use to be) and that fascination will lead to the very best
kind of learning in the world. Start by being your child's advocate,
his partner and helping him get the things he loves and desires.
Start by making today's focus all about joy, all about your
relationship with him and about how to make the moment glorious.
Start by forgetting that school exists and remembering how to LIVE.:)
Live deeply, richly and passionately and you will be unschooling.
Live with intention, with determination and self-knowledge.
Good living leads to learning. So focus on making LIFE wonderful and
learning will begin to unfold naturally.
Start today by declaring this very moment a vacation. You're on
vacation from "shoulds", "have to's" and requirements. You're on
vacation from school with all of it's toxic trappings. You're on
vacation from seeing your child as "ADHD". He is who he is, a
perfectly whole and capable human being and in this very moment you
can choose to see him as such.
This vacation you're beginning today is about finding your joy again.
As both of you do the things that bring joy into your home and spirit,
you will feel the chains of school loosen, the bonds begin to break.
As you connect as mother and child over your interests, you will see
how beautiful learning can truly be. As you begin to truly LIVE,
you'll wonder at those that stay trapped within the box of school and
never choose to fly free.
Grasp your freedom today, it's calling you......
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
Ellen Christian
Thanks, Ren. The Home Study packet tells me what I have to do legally in VT to homeschool him - paperwork, etc. I want to make sure I do this legally.
Can I ask how you deal with socialization? We live in the country so we don't really have neighborhood kids for him to play with. His social skills could use some improving but I don't think the school is handling that properly. What's the best way to make sure he gets to interact with other kids?
Ellen
Ren Allen <starsuncloud@...> wrote:
If you'd like to try unschooling him, then you can just throw that
Home Study packet away!:) They won't give you the information you need
for unschooling, but homeschooling, which is repeating the very worst
parts of school usually.
Ellen LaFleche-Christian
Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
Receive a recipe every day http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
---------------------------------
Blab-away for as little as 1¢/min. Make PC-to-Phone Calls using Yahoo! Messenger with Voice.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Can I ask how you deal with socialization? We live in the country so we don't really have neighborhood kids for him to play with. His social skills could use some improving but I don't think the school is handling that properly. What's the best way to make sure he gets to interact with other kids?
Ellen
Ren Allen <starsuncloud@...> wrote:
If you'd like to try unschooling him, then you can just throw that
Home Study packet away!:) They won't give you the information you need
for unschooling, but homeschooling, which is repeating the very worst
parts of school usually.
Ellen LaFleche-Christian
Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
Receive a recipe every day http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
---------------------------------
Blab-away for as little as 1¢/min. Make PC-to-Phone Calls using Yahoo! Messenger with Voice.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Deb
--- In [email protected], "Ren Allen"
<starsuncloud@...> wrote:
sent in to cover the legalities. I would suggest, though, checking the
LAW out thoroughly and make sure that anything you put down in the
paperwork is the minimum required by law. Just because there's a space
on the form does not necessarily mean you have to fill it in. One
would hope that the form complied with the law but that isn't always
the case.
--Deb
<starsuncloud@...> wrote:
>The packet, I think, is the paperwork that needs to be filled out and
> "I have requested the Home Study Packet from my state (Vermont) and
> I'd like to try unschooling him."
>
> If you'd like to try unschooling him, then you can just throw that
> Home Study packet away!:)
sent in to cover the legalities. I would suggest, though, checking the
LAW out thoroughly and make sure that anything you put down in the
paperwork is the minimum required by law. Just because there's a space
on the form does not necessarily mean you have to fill it in. One
would hope that the form complied with the law but that isn't always
the case.
--Deb
Ren Allen
"The packet, I think, is the paperwork that needs to be filled out and
sent in to cover the legalities. I would suggest, though, checking the
LAW out thoroughly and make sure that anything you put down in the
paperwork is the minimum required by law."
Ah, I see.
I would still talk to other unschoolers before I sent anything in,
I've found that some states leave out options they don't want you to
use. For example, in Florida they heavily lead folks AWAY from the
umbrella school option which is the best option for unschoolers.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
sent in to cover the legalities. I would suggest, though, checking the
LAW out thoroughly and make sure that anything you put down in the
paperwork is the minimum required by law."
Ah, I see.
I would still talk to other unschoolers before I sent anything in,
I've found that some states leave out options they don't want you to
use. For example, in Florida they heavily lead folks AWAY from the
umbrella school option which is the best option for unschoolers.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
Pampered Chef Michelle
On 4/7/06, Ellen Christian
Can I ask how you deal with socialization? We live in the country so we
don't really have neighborhood kids for him to play with. His social skills
could use some improving but I don't think the school is handling that
properly. What's the best way to make sure he gets to interact with other
kids?
******************************
What is he interested in doing? Any sports? Music? Art? Paintball?
Bowling? All those activities can bring in socialization. Look for an
unschooling yahoogroup in your area (or at least in your state so you can
hook up with other unschoolers in your area). Do you go to church? Taking
him out of school does not mean you have to take away any friends he has
made from school. My oldest daughter still is friends with her best friend
from one of her forays into public school. They call each other on the
phone and chat online.
Socialization doesn't have to be limited to being around other children nor
children your child's age. Do you only socialize with adults your own age
or do you have a wide age group of people with whom you socialize. People
are often impressed that my children can communicate to adults. Why
shouldn't the be able to? They've spent their lives talking with people in
every age group not just isolated with a bunch of other kids. School is an
artificial socialization situation.
And I have one child who doesn't crave being around other children. He
enjoys them (for the most part) when we do things with other families, but
he is just as content to do things with adults or by himself. He would much
prefer to go to my dad's house and climb under his house and help him move
stuff or tape up pipes for the winter than go to resource day and if my dad
offered to walk him up to Krispy Kreme for a donut he would choose that over
a birthday party! So depending on your child socialization may not be an
issue at all.
--
Michelle
Independent Kitchen Consultant #413652
The Pampered Chef
850-474-0817
http://www.pamperedchef.biz/michellelr
Ask me how you can save 60% on some of our most favorite products!
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Can I ask how you deal with socialization? We live in the country so we
don't really have neighborhood kids for him to play with. His social skills
could use some improving but I don't think the school is handling that
properly. What's the best way to make sure he gets to interact with other
kids?
******************************
What is he interested in doing? Any sports? Music? Art? Paintball?
Bowling? All those activities can bring in socialization. Look for an
unschooling yahoogroup in your area (or at least in your state so you can
hook up with other unschoolers in your area). Do you go to church? Taking
him out of school does not mean you have to take away any friends he has
made from school. My oldest daughter still is friends with her best friend
from one of her forays into public school. They call each other on the
phone and chat online.
Socialization doesn't have to be limited to being around other children nor
children your child's age. Do you only socialize with adults your own age
or do you have a wide age group of people with whom you socialize. People
are often impressed that my children can communicate to adults. Why
shouldn't the be able to? They've spent their lives talking with people in
every age group not just isolated with a bunch of other kids. School is an
artificial socialization situation.
And I have one child who doesn't crave being around other children. He
enjoys them (for the most part) when we do things with other families, but
he is just as content to do things with adults or by himself. He would much
prefer to go to my dad's house and climb under his house and help him move
stuff or tape up pipes for the winter than go to resource day and if my dad
offered to walk him up to Krispy Kreme for a donut he would choose that over
a birthday party! So depending on your child socialization may not be an
issue at all.
--
Michelle
Independent Kitchen Consultant #413652
The Pampered Chef
850-474-0817
http://www.pamperedchef.biz/michellelr
Ask me how you can save 60% on some of our most favorite products!
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Ellen Christian
He does like sports. I'm not sure if he's allowed to join the sports teams at school if we homeschool but I will check. He likes to read, do legos, art projects, ride his bike. We go to church occasionally but it's a small congregation and there are no other kids his age there. He doesn't have a lot of friends at school since his social skills are lacking but he does have a few. I guess I will try to arrange play dates & check into the sports issue.
thanks :)
Ellen
Pampered Chef Michelle <pamperedmichelle@...> wrote:
What is he interested in doing? Any sports? Music? Art? Paintball?
Bowling? All those activities can bring in socialization. Look for an
unschooling yahoogroup in your area (or at least in your state so you can
hook up with other unschoolers in your area). Do you go to church?
Ellen LaFleche-Christian
Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
Receive a recipe every day http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
---------------------------------
Yahoo! Messenger with Voice. Make PC-to-Phone Calls to the US (and 30+ countries) for 2¢/min or less.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
thanks :)
Ellen
Pampered Chef Michelle <pamperedmichelle@...> wrote:
What is he interested in doing? Any sports? Music? Art? Paintball?
Bowling? All those activities can bring in socialization. Look for an
unschooling yahoogroup in your area (or at least in your state so you can
hook up with other unschoolers in your area). Do you go to church?
Ellen LaFleche-Christian
Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
Receive a recipe every day http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
---------------------------------
Yahoo! Messenger with Voice. Make PC-to-Phone Calls to the US (and 30+ countries) for 2¢/min or less.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
trektheory
Not a surprise that his social skills didn't improve with school --
that is not an ideal place to learn them!
We have an only child, and when we started hsing, lived in a
neighborhood that didn't have kids for him to play with, so that was
an issue for us. My son does scouting, so has had that all along,
but I also always worked at making sure there were playdates and
such. Park days are good, etc. Sometimes you have to drive a bit,
but the fun they have, and the friends they (and you) make are worth
it. If you meet someone that you/he click with, you can always
arrange playdates at each others houses.
When we moved most recently, that was our biggest issue -- I have a
teen, and connecting with other teens here isn't easy. I ended up
starting an inclusive teen (and tween) group, so that activities
geared towards older kids could occur -- they just never do on other
groups, and older kids sometimes need other kids to hang out with!
If there are other homeschoolers/homeschool groups in your area, I
recommend you join (if you haven't already) and see who is out there!
Linda
--- In [email protected], Ellen Christian
<scentednights2002@...> wrote:
sure I do this legally.
with. His social skills could use some improving but I don't think
the school is handling that properly. What's the best way to make
sure he gets to interact with other kids?
that is not an ideal place to learn them!
We have an only child, and when we started hsing, lived in a
neighborhood that didn't have kids for him to play with, so that was
an issue for us. My son does scouting, so has had that all along,
but I also always worked at making sure there were playdates and
such. Park days are good, etc. Sometimes you have to drive a bit,
but the fun they have, and the friends they (and you) make are worth
it. If you meet someone that you/he click with, you can always
arrange playdates at each others houses.
When we moved most recently, that was our biggest issue -- I have a
teen, and connecting with other teens here isn't easy. I ended up
starting an inclusive teen (and tween) group, so that activities
geared towards older kids could occur -- they just never do on other
groups, and older kids sometimes need other kids to hang out with!
If there are other homeschoolers/homeschool groups in your area, I
recommend you join (if you haven't already) and see who is out there!
Linda
--- In [email protected], Ellen Christian
<scentednights2002@...> wrote:
>legally in VT to homeschool him - paperwork, etc. I want to make
> Thanks, Ren. The Home Study packet tells me what I have to do
sure I do this legally.
>country so we don't really have neighborhood kids for him to play
> Can I ask how you deal with socialization? We live in the
with. His social skills could use some improving but I don't think
the school is handling that properly. What's the best way to make
sure he gets to interact with other kids?
>that
> Ellen
>
> Ren Allen <starsuncloud@...> wrote:
> If you'd like to try unschooling him, then you can just throw
> Home Study packet away!:) They won't give you the information youneed
> for unschooling, but homeschooling, which is repeating the veryworst
> parts of school usually.jewelry.com
>
>
> Ellen LaFleche-Christian
> Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts http://moonlight-creations-
> Receive a recipe every dayhttp://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
>Yahoo! Messenger with Voice.
>
>
>
> ---------------------------------
> Blab-away for as little as 1¢/min. Make PC-to-Phone Calls using
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
Deb
--- In [email protected], "Ren Allen"
<starsuncloud@...> wrote:
instead of options. In VT, far as I can tell from afar, the only
option in it all is what kind of evaluation you want to do - have a
certified teacher write an assessment, get a report from a
commercial curriculum publisher (one of those where you send in the
work and they grade it I guess) plus a portfolio, or do a
standardized test. I'd definitely find unschoolers in the area
though to check out the local climate.
Also, some administrative personnel have taken the process to be
an 'approval' process where they 'approve' your plans. That is NOT
the case legally (and there is case law supporting it). It is simply
notification that "Hey this is what I'm doing" and IF they have good
cause can they call a hearing to clear things up but they cannot
say "No you can't" out of hand because they don't like your plans.
--Deb
<starsuncloud@...> wrote:
>to
> Ah, I see.
> I would still talk to other unschoolers before I sent anything in,
> I've found that some states leave out options they don't want you
> use. For example, in Florida they heavily lead folks AWAY from theAlas and alack some states only have one rule for home educators,
> umbrella school option which is the best option for unschoolers.
>
> Ren
> learninginfreedom.com
>
instead of options. In VT, far as I can tell from afar, the only
option in it all is what kind of evaluation you want to do - have a
certified teacher write an assessment, get a report from a
commercial curriculum publisher (one of those where you send in the
work and they grade it I guess) plus a portfolio, or do a
standardized test. I'd definitely find unschoolers in the area
though to check out the local climate.
Also, some administrative personnel have taken the process to be
an 'approval' process where they 'approve' your plans. That is NOT
the case legally (and there is case law supporting it). It is simply
notification that "Hey this is what I'm doing" and IF they have good
cause can they call a hearing to clear things up but they cannot
say "No you can't" out of hand because they don't like your plans.
--Deb
lydia c.
On 4/7/06, Ellen Christian <scentednights2002@...> wrote:
Can I ask how you deal with socialization? We live in the country so we
> don't really have neighborhood kids for him to play with. His social skills
> could use some improving but I don't think the school is handling that
> properly. What's the best way to make sure he gets to interact with other
> kids?
>
> Ellen
Ellen,
We have a lot of the same problems living in the country. The town has
1,600. However, because I have alway taken Lyndsey with me she has always
been around people. We go to the local park just as school is letting out.
There are lots of kids to play with. When we go shopping I have her ask for
a cookie if she wants it. I don't talk for her but I do help her how to ask
politely for what she wants.
Lydia
--
Be the person you want your children to become.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
>> What's the best way to make sure he gets to interact with other kids?>>There is no "best" way. You'll need to keep your eyes open for possibilities available in your area. When we lived in the mountains, I rountinely drove the kids for up to an hour to meet up with other homeschoolers. We also did some scouts, gymnastics, snowboarding, swimming, and soccer. We hung out at the library and park and often met other kids there. And remember he doesn't need to only socialize with other kids. He can have friends of all ages.
--
~Mary
http://zenmommasgarden.blogspot.com/
"The miracle is not to walk on water. The miracle is to walk on the
green earth, dwelling deeply in the present moment and feeling truly
alive."
~Thich Nhat Hanh
-------------- Original message ----------------------
From: Ellen Christian <scentednights2002@...>
Melanie Ilsley
Ellen, Your son can participate in sports, classes, anything that the school offers, as long
as they have space. The home study program people are actually really helpful, and the ps
in our area was very open to having our 8yr old in whatever she wanted to be involved in.
Where are you in Vt, there are a lot of homeschoolers in Vt and a list through the hoe
study program. I may also have some info, or contacts in your area, if i can helo let me
know. Melanie in vt--- In [email protected], Ellen Christian
<scentednights2002@...> wrote:
to church occasionally but it's a small congregation and there are no other kids his age
there. He doesn't have a lot of friends at school since his social skills are lacking but he
does have a few. I guess I will try to arrange play dates & check into the sports issue.
as they have space. The home study program people are actually really helpful, and the ps
in our area was very open to having our 8yr old in whatever she wanted to be involved in.
Where are you in Vt, there are a lot of homeschoolers in Vt and a list through the hoe
study program. I may also have some info, or contacts in your area, if i can helo let me
know. Melanie in vt--- In [email protected], Ellen Christian
<scentednights2002@...> wrote:
>homeschool but I will check. He likes to read, do legos, art projects, ride his bike. We go
> He does like sports. I'm not sure if he's allowed to join the sports teams at school if we
to church occasionally but it's a small congregation and there are no other kids his age
there. He doesn't have a lot of friends at school since his social skills are lacking but he
does have a few. I guess I will try to arrange play dates & check into the sports issue.
>2¢/min or less.
> thanks :)
> Ellen
>
> Pampered Chef Michelle <pamperedmichelle@...> wrote:
> What is he interested in doing? Any sports? Music? Art? Paintball?
> Bowling? All those activities can bring in socialization. Look for an
> unschooling yahoogroup in your area (or at least in your state so you can
> hook up with other unschoolers in your area). Do you go to church?
>
>
> Ellen LaFleche-Christian
> Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
> Receive a recipe every day http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
>
>
>
>
> ---------------------------------
> Yahoo! Messenger with Voice. Make PC-to-Phone Calls to the US (and 30+ countries) for
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
Ellen Christian
My son is 8 and is having some problems in school with social skills, etc. His grades are very good As/Bs and he likes school but he has ADHD and just isn't fitting into the school's "box" very well during their unstructured times (recess, lunch, etc.) He does OK in classes but cannot take the bus and keeps getting in trouble in unstructured times. My thought is that by homeschooling him, it will be easier because I can give him the one on one attention he needs. BUT what if he doesn't want me to homeschool him? I plan on keeping him in math class at school since I hate math & he does quite well at it. It will give him some needed socialization and will keep a tie to the school so if I want him to go back at some point the transition will be easier. Plus I'm going to keep signing him up for the sports teams so he'll get to see his friends. We live in a small rural town so we don't have a lot of opportunities for extra curricular type activities.
Am I wrong to take him out so it's easier? Should I just keep having him go until he learns to follow their rules and not get in trouble? Will he learn to behave better if I keep him home? Or does he need to go to school to learn to follow rules?
I'm just really confused at this point and could use some suggestions. He's a very bright child and I want to make sure he's challenged at home and still "learns". I just don't want his self esteem damaged because he is constantly getting in trouble.
Somebody help!
Ellen LaFleche-Christian
Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
Receive a recipe every day http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
---------------------------------
Love cheap thrills? Enjoy PC-to-Phone calls to 30+ countries for just 2¢/min with Yahoo! Messenger with Voice.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Am I wrong to take him out so it's easier? Should I just keep having him go until he learns to follow their rules and not get in trouble? Will he learn to behave better if I keep him home? Or does he need to go to school to learn to follow rules?
I'm just really confused at this point and could use some suggestions. He's a very bright child and I want to make sure he's challenged at home and still "learns". I just don't want his self esteem damaged because he is constantly getting in trouble.
Somebody help!
Ellen LaFleche-Christian
Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
Receive a recipe every day http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
---------------------------------
Love cheap thrills? Enjoy PC-to-Phone calls to 30+ countries for just 2¢/min with Yahoo! Messenger with Voice.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Karen Rose
I am new to unschooling......I took my son out just over a month ago. I am responding because your story is so similar to ours. My son Anthony is 10 and does great academically and is a great kid but socially was another problem. He just didn't fit in to what the school seems to want and over the years I found it kept getting worse instead of better. His self esteem was getting crushed and I kept him in school because I kept listening to other people saying he won't ever learn social skills if you take him out etc etc.
This year I just couldn't take it anymore. I spoke with different homeschoolers/unschoolers and got a different response than what I kept getting from his school. Everyone told me the same thing.....take him out of school and he will change for the better....he will start to feel more comfortable and his self esteem will start to be restored...and guess what......its been about a month and the change in him is amazing....totally incredible!! He is relaxed and happy....its a joy for me to see this in him everyday!!!!!
Anthony also loves math and science.....so I chose to get him a tutor who specializes in these subjects so Anthony can ask him all the questions he wants....we do it in a very unstructured way....its really cool. I am just awful in math and science so I felt going with a tutor was a great idea for us. I didn't want anything to do with the school district anymore.
I hope my little story helps!!
Peace
Karen in NY
Ellen Christian <scentednights2002@...> wrote:
My son is 8 and is having some problems in school with social skills, etc. His grades are very good As/Bs and he likes school but he has ADHD and just isn't fitting into the school's "box" very well during their unstructured times (recess, lunch, etc.) He does OK in classes but cannot take the bus and keeps getting in trouble in unstructured times. My thought is that by homeschooling him, it will be easier because I can give him the one on one attention he needs. BUT what if he doesn't want me to homeschool him? I plan on keeping him in math class at school since I hate math & he does quite well at it. It will give him some needed socialization and will keep a tie to the school so if I want him to go back at some point the transition will be easier. Plus I'm going to keep signing him up for the sports teams so he'll get to see his friends. We live in a small rural town so we don't have a lot of opportunities for extra curricular type activities.
Am I wrong to take him out so it's easier? Should I just keep having him go until he learns to follow their rules and not get in trouble? Will he learn to behave better if I keep him home? Or does he need to go to school to learn to follow rules?
I'm just really confused at this point and could use some suggestions. He's a very bright child and I want to make sure he's challenged at home and still "learns". I just don't want his self esteem damaged because he is constantly getting in trouble.
Somebody help!
Ellen LaFleche-Christian
Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
Receive a recipe every day http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
---------------------------------
Love cheap thrills? Enjoy PC-to-Phone calls to 30+ countries for just 2¢/min with Yahoo! Messenger with Voice.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
SPONSORED LINKS
Secondary school education Graduate school education Home school education Graduate school education online High school education Chicago school education
---------------------------------
YAHOO! GROUPS LINKS
Visit your group "unschoolingbasics" on the web.
To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
[email protected]
Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms of Service.
---------------------------------
---------------------------------
New Yahoo! Messenger with Voice. Call regular phones from your PC and save big.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
This year I just couldn't take it anymore. I spoke with different homeschoolers/unschoolers and got a different response than what I kept getting from his school. Everyone told me the same thing.....take him out of school and he will change for the better....he will start to feel more comfortable and his self esteem will start to be restored...and guess what......its been about a month and the change in him is amazing....totally incredible!! He is relaxed and happy....its a joy for me to see this in him everyday!!!!!
Anthony also loves math and science.....so I chose to get him a tutor who specializes in these subjects so Anthony can ask him all the questions he wants....we do it in a very unstructured way....its really cool. I am just awful in math and science so I felt going with a tutor was a great idea for us. I didn't want anything to do with the school district anymore.
I hope my little story helps!!
Peace
Karen in NY
Ellen Christian <scentednights2002@...> wrote:
My son is 8 and is having some problems in school with social skills, etc. His grades are very good As/Bs and he likes school but he has ADHD and just isn't fitting into the school's "box" very well during their unstructured times (recess, lunch, etc.) He does OK in classes but cannot take the bus and keeps getting in trouble in unstructured times. My thought is that by homeschooling him, it will be easier because I can give him the one on one attention he needs. BUT what if he doesn't want me to homeschool him? I plan on keeping him in math class at school since I hate math & he does quite well at it. It will give him some needed socialization and will keep a tie to the school so if I want him to go back at some point the transition will be easier. Plus I'm going to keep signing him up for the sports teams so he'll get to see his friends. We live in a small rural town so we don't have a lot of opportunities for extra curricular type activities.
Am I wrong to take him out so it's easier? Should I just keep having him go until he learns to follow their rules and not get in trouble? Will he learn to behave better if I keep him home? Or does he need to go to school to learn to follow rules?
I'm just really confused at this point and could use some suggestions. He's a very bright child and I want to make sure he's challenged at home and still "learns". I just don't want his self esteem damaged because he is constantly getting in trouble.
Somebody help!
Ellen LaFleche-Christian
Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
Receive a recipe every day http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
---------------------------------
Love cheap thrills? Enjoy PC-to-Phone calls to 30+ countries for just 2¢/min with Yahoo! Messenger with Voice.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
SPONSORED LINKS
Secondary school education Graduate school education Home school education Graduate school education online High school education Chicago school education
---------------------------------
YAHOO! GROUPS LINKS
Visit your group "unschoolingbasics" on the web.
To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
[email protected]
Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms of Service.
---------------------------------
---------------------------------
New Yahoo! Messenger with Voice. Call regular phones from your PC and save big.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Priscilla Sanstead
Ellen,
My daughter went through the same thing 5 years ago at
age 8---bus misbehaving, losing recess, forced (that
alphabetical order thing) to sit by a bully at lunch
who kept telling her that her face was ugly!
Many thoughts:
He may be bored,and not have ADHD if there is such a
thing. They wanted my daughter drugged and I did
it!!!---to my eternal regret. Smart kids can have a
lots of trouble sitting still, they have too much
going on in their brain. If so, unschooling is the
answer. He also may be "wiggling" more than other kids
to get attention---being bored and wanting something
to do, and the other kids may enjoy it!
Why do you want to take him back for math and have all
those same things happen to him? Just because you
aren't good at math is OK. We don't "teach" our
children. we facilitate their learning. If he likes
math, he will be fine. There are so many math computer
games and web sites (Living Math and their chat forum
are fabulous!), and you could get an older kid to
tutor him. He could also tutor a younger child.
Socialization---what exactly do you mean by that
really? There are a lots of bad things that kids pick
up at school---from the teachers (self esteem about
not fitting in the box, being different even if you
are smart or slow, to name a few). Of course the kids
have bullying/name calling issues, different values
from yours, etc, and it only gets worse as the years
go by. Does he want to take piano or karate or
archery?
Are there any homeschooling groups around? There may
be homeschoolers, even if there are no groups. The
librarians may know---they see the kids not in public
school. Speaking of the library, could you help the
librarians start an after-school interest group to
meet other kids---Yu-Gi-Oh cards or something like
that?
I took neighborhood kids on field trips with us (or we
went alone). We saw kids with school groups being
herded, hollered at, having to take notes for a paper
to be graded, hardly getting to see anything, while we
looked at our leisure at what WE wanted to look at,
then picnic'd, laughed, and played til long after they
were back at school. You know how pointless it is to
try to cram knowledge into someone that not interested
(either they're having a bad day, or they aren't
developmentally ready for it, or it's a subject they
hate and always will). There is just no retention if
you aren't interested. Google " 'rithmetic and
Sudbury" and read about kids who begged to learn math,
and learn it at breakneck speed.
Have you asked him about learning at home instead of
school? He may be thrilled!
Have you read a lot? ---books, on-line, Sandra Dodd,
John Gatto, old posts on unschoolingbasics, etc.
Best of luck to you. On-line support groups help soooo
much.
Priscilla
--- Ellen Christian <scentednights2002@...>
wrote:
Do You Yahoo!?
Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around
http://mail.yahoo.com
My daughter went through the same thing 5 years ago at
age 8---bus misbehaving, losing recess, forced (that
alphabetical order thing) to sit by a bully at lunch
who kept telling her that her face was ugly!
Many thoughts:
He may be bored,and not have ADHD if there is such a
thing. They wanted my daughter drugged and I did
it!!!---to my eternal regret. Smart kids can have a
lots of trouble sitting still, they have too much
going on in their brain. If so, unschooling is the
answer. He also may be "wiggling" more than other kids
to get attention---being bored and wanting something
to do, and the other kids may enjoy it!
Why do you want to take him back for math and have all
those same things happen to him? Just because you
aren't good at math is OK. We don't "teach" our
children. we facilitate their learning. If he likes
math, he will be fine. There are so many math computer
games and web sites (Living Math and their chat forum
are fabulous!), and you could get an older kid to
tutor him. He could also tutor a younger child.
Socialization---what exactly do you mean by that
really? There are a lots of bad things that kids pick
up at school---from the teachers (self esteem about
not fitting in the box, being different even if you
are smart or slow, to name a few). Of course the kids
have bullying/name calling issues, different values
from yours, etc, and it only gets worse as the years
go by. Does he want to take piano or karate or
archery?
Are there any homeschooling groups around? There may
be homeschoolers, even if there are no groups. The
librarians may know---they see the kids not in public
school. Speaking of the library, could you help the
librarians start an after-school interest group to
meet other kids---Yu-Gi-Oh cards or something like
that?
I took neighborhood kids on field trips with us (or we
went alone). We saw kids with school groups being
herded, hollered at, having to take notes for a paper
to be graded, hardly getting to see anything, while we
looked at our leisure at what WE wanted to look at,
then picnic'd, laughed, and played til long after they
were back at school. You know how pointless it is to
try to cram knowledge into someone that not interested
(either they're having a bad day, or they aren't
developmentally ready for it, or it's a subject they
hate and always will). There is just no retention if
you aren't interested. Google " 'rithmetic and
Sudbury" and read about kids who begged to learn math,
and learn it at breakneck speed.
Have you asked him about learning at home instead of
school? He may be thrilled!
Have you read a lot? ---books, on-line, Sandra Dodd,
John Gatto, old posts on unschoolingbasics, etc.
Best of luck to you. On-line support groups help soooo
much.
Priscilla
--- Ellen Christian <scentednights2002@...>
wrote:
> My son is 8 and is having some problems in school__________________________________________________
> with social skills, etc. His grades are very good
> As/Bs and he likes school but he has ADHD and just
> isn't fitting into the school's "box" very well
> during their unstructured times (recess, lunch,
> etc.) He does OK in classes but cannot take the bus
> and keeps getting in trouble in unstructured times.
> My thought is that by homeschooling him, it will be
> easier because I can give him the one on one
> attention he needs. BUT what if he doesn't want me
> to homeschool him? I plan on keeping him in math
> class at school since I hate math & he does quite
> well at it. It will give him some needed
> socialization and will keep a tie to the school so
> if I want him to go back at some point the
> transition will be easier. Plus I'm going to keep
> signing him up for the sports teams so he'll get to
> see his friends. We live in a small rural town so we
> don't have a lot of opportunities for extra
> curricular type activities.
>
> Am I wrong to take him out so it's easier? Should
> I just keep having him go until he learns to follow
> their rules and not get in trouble? Will he learn to
> behave better if I keep him home? Or does he need to
> go to school to learn to follow rules?
>
> I'm just really confused at this point and could
> use some suggestions. He's a very bright child and I
> want to make sure he's challenged at home and still
> "learns". I just don't want his self esteem damaged
> because he is constantly getting in trouble.
>
> Somebody help!
>
>
>
> Ellen LaFleche-Christian
> Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts
> http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
> Receive a recipe every day
> http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
>
>
>
>
> ---------------------------------
> Love cheap thrills? Enjoy PC-to-Phone calls to 30+
> countries for just 2¢/min with Yahoo! Messenger with
> Voice.
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been
> removed]
>
>
Do You Yahoo!?
Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around
http://mail.yahoo.com
Ellen Christian
Hi Priscilla - Thanks for your email. I'll try to address your thoughts.
1. I've always told the school he was bored but they didn't believe me. He's a very bright kid. At 7 he was reading the Harry Potter books. I feel I can address that best at home.
2. In Vermont, if you home school, you don't get a high school diploma unless you graduate high school or use a curriculum that offers a diploma. Many colleges won't accept a GED. He will be back in public school by 7th or 8th grade so he can go to high school and then to college. He really needs to be taught the same style of math that our school system uses in order to transition easily back into public school. He does quite well in classes - it's the unstructured times he has problems in.
3. Socialization to me means learning social skills. He's immature for his age. He has a tendancy to lie and he unfortunately seems to choose the worst possible friends to play with at school - ones who are similarly ostricized because they don't behave. I want him to learn to interact with other kids his age properly in a team type environment like organized sports so he learns self discipline and team work. I can also work on changing the behaviors we don't approve of like lying at home and I can work on bolstering his self esteem as well.
4. I have not yet found any home school groups in my area. There were two 7th grade girls who were home schooled last year but one moved out of town and one went back to public school to prepare for high school. I understand there are a few families that home school about 35 minutes from here but I haven't found out their names yet or what their kids ages are. We are in a small rural town. Our librarian is the mom of the 7th grade girl who just went back to public school after being home schooled. She's also involved in our gifted and talented program at the elementary school. She's going to see if she can find out about any people in the area that might home school.
I talked to him about home schooling him and his response was "awesome" so I guess that won't be an issue LOL. He loved the idea of going to school for math to see his friends.
He really loves to learn and loves to read. He loves Harry Potter. He can identify almost any country on the globe. He's interested in dinosaurs, planets, magnets, volcanoes LOL and lots more things.
I have a few books requested on interlibrary loan by John Holt and I've been to a bunch of unschooling websites. My next hurdle is filling out this paperwork the state says I need to submit.
thanks!
Ellen
Priscilla Sanstead <bobcatpris2000@...> wrote:
Ellen,
My daughter went through the same thing 5 years ago at
age 8---bus misbehaving, losing recess, forced (that
alphabetical order thing) to sit by a bully at lunch
who kept telling her that her face was ugly!
Many thoughts:
He may be bored,and not have ADHD if there is such a
thing. They wanted my daughter drugged and I did
it!!!---to my eternal regret. Smart kids can have a
lots of trouble sitting still, they have too much
going on in their brain. If so, unschooling is the
answer. He also may be "wiggling" more than other kids
to get attention---being bored and wanting something
to do, and the other kids may enjoy it!
Why do you want to take him back for math and have all
those same things happen to him? Just because you
aren't good at math is OK. We don't "teach" our
children. we facilitate their learning. If he likes
math, he will be fine. There are so many math computer
games and web sites (Living Math and their chat forum
are fabulous!), and you could get an older kid to
tutor him. He could also tutor a younger child.
Socialization---what exactly do you mean by that
really? There are a lots of bad things that kids pick
up at school---from the teachers (self esteem about
not fitting in the box, being different even if you
are smart or slow, to name a few). Of course the kids
have bullying/name calling issues, different values
from yours, etc, and it only gets worse as the years
go by. Does he want to take piano or karate or
archery?
Are there any homeschooling groups around? There may
be homeschoolers, even if there are no groups. The
librarians may know---they see the kids not in public
school. Speaking of the library, could you help the
librarians start an after-school interest group to
meet other kids---Yu-Gi-Oh cards or something like
that?
I took neighborhood kids on field trips with us (or we
went alone). We saw kids with school groups being
herded, hollered at, having to take notes for a paper
to be graded, hardly getting to see anything, while we
looked at our leisure at what WE wanted to look at,
then picnic'd, laughed, and played til long after they
were back at school. You know how pointless it is to
try to cram knowledge into someone that not interested
(either they're having a bad day, or they aren't
developmentally ready for it, or it's a subject they
hate and always will). There is just no retention if
you aren't interested. Google " 'rithmetic and
Sudbury" and read about kids who begged to learn math,
and learn it at breakneck speed.
Have you asked him about learning at home instead of
school? He may be thrilled!
Have you read a lot? ---books, on-line, Sandra Dodd,
John Gatto, old posts on unschoolingbasics, etc.
Best of luck to you. On-line support groups help soooo
much.
Priscilla
--- Ellen Christian <scentednights2002@...>
wrote:
Do You Yahoo!?
Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around
http://mail.yahoo.com
---------------------------------
YAHOO! GROUPS LINKS
Visit your group "unschoolingbasics" on the web.
To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
[email protected]
Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms of Service.
---------------------------------
Ellen LaFleche-Christian
Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
Receive a recipe every day http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
---------------------------------
How low will we go? Check out Yahoo! Messengers low PC-to-Phone call rates.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
1. I've always told the school he was bored but they didn't believe me. He's a very bright kid. At 7 he was reading the Harry Potter books. I feel I can address that best at home.
2. In Vermont, if you home school, you don't get a high school diploma unless you graduate high school or use a curriculum that offers a diploma. Many colleges won't accept a GED. He will be back in public school by 7th or 8th grade so he can go to high school and then to college. He really needs to be taught the same style of math that our school system uses in order to transition easily back into public school. He does quite well in classes - it's the unstructured times he has problems in.
3. Socialization to me means learning social skills. He's immature for his age. He has a tendancy to lie and he unfortunately seems to choose the worst possible friends to play with at school - ones who are similarly ostricized because they don't behave. I want him to learn to interact with other kids his age properly in a team type environment like organized sports so he learns self discipline and team work. I can also work on changing the behaviors we don't approve of like lying at home and I can work on bolstering his self esteem as well.
4. I have not yet found any home school groups in my area. There were two 7th grade girls who were home schooled last year but one moved out of town and one went back to public school to prepare for high school. I understand there are a few families that home school about 35 minutes from here but I haven't found out their names yet or what their kids ages are. We are in a small rural town. Our librarian is the mom of the 7th grade girl who just went back to public school after being home schooled. She's also involved in our gifted and talented program at the elementary school. She's going to see if she can find out about any people in the area that might home school.
I talked to him about home schooling him and his response was "awesome" so I guess that won't be an issue LOL. He loved the idea of going to school for math to see his friends.
He really loves to learn and loves to read. He loves Harry Potter. He can identify almost any country on the globe. He's interested in dinosaurs, planets, magnets, volcanoes LOL and lots more things.
I have a few books requested on interlibrary loan by John Holt and I've been to a bunch of unschooling websites. My next hurdle is filling out this paperwork the state says I need to submit.
thanks!
Ellen
Priscilla Sanstead <bobcatpris2000@...> wrote:
Ellen,
My daughter went through the same thing 5 years ago at
age 8---bus misbehaving, losing recess, forced (that
alphabetical order thing) to sit by a bully at lunch
who kept telling her that her face was ugly!
Many thoughts:
He may be bored,and not have ADHD if there is such a
thing. They wanted my daughter drugged and I did
it!!!---to my eternal regret. Smart kids can have a
lots of trouble sitting still, they have too much
going on in their brain. If so, unschooling is the
answer. He also may be "wiggling" more than other kids
to get attention---being bored and wanting something
to do, and the other kids may enjoy it!
Why do you want to take him back for math and have all
those same things happen to him? Just because you
aren't good at math is OK. We don't "teach" our
children. we facilitate their learning. If he likes
math, he will be fine. There are so many math computer
games and web sites (Living Math and their chat forum
are fabulous!), and you could get an older kid to
tutor him. He could also tutor a younger child.
Socialization---what exactly do you mean by that
really? There are a lots of bad things that kids pick
up at school---from the teachers (self esteem about
not fitting in the box, being different even if you
are smart or slow, to name a few). Of course the kids
have bullying/name calling issues, different values
from yours, etc, and it only gets worse as the years
go by. Does he want to take piano or karate or
archery?
Are there any homeschooling groups around? There may
be homeschoolers, even if there are no groups. The
librarians may know---they see the kids not in public
school. Speaking of the library, could you help the
librarians start an after-school interest group to
meet other kids---Yu-Gi-Oh cards or something like
that?
I took neighborhood kids on field trips with us (or we
went alone). We saw kids with school groups being
herded, hollered at, having to take notes for a paper
to be graded, hardly getting to see anything, while we
looked at our leisure at what WE wanted to look at,
then picnic'd, laughed, and played til long after they
were back at school. You know how pointless it is to
try to cram knowledge into someone that not interested
(either they're having a bad day, or they aren't
developmentally ready for it, or it's a subject they
hate and always will). There is just no retention if
you aren't interested. Google " 'rithmetic and
Sudbury" and read about kids who begged to learn math,
and learn it at breakneck speed.
Have you asked him about learning at home instead of
school? He may be thrilled!
Have you read a lot? ---books, on-line, Sandra Dodd,
John Gatto, old posts on unschoolingbasics, etc.
Best of luck to you. On-line support groups help soooo
much.
Priscilla
--- Ellen Christian <scentednights2002@...>
wrote:
> My son is 8 and is having some problems in school__________________________________________________
> with social skills, etc. His grades are very good
> As/Bs and he likes school but he has ADHD and just
> isn't fitting into the school's "box" very well
> during their unstructured times (recess, lunch,
> etc.) He does OK in classes but cannot take the bus
> and keeps getting in trouble in unstructured times.
> My thought is that by homeschooling him, it will be
> easier because I can give him the one on one
> attention he needs. BUT what if he doesn't want me
> to homeschool him? I plan on keeping him in math
> class at school since I hate math & he does quite
> well at it. It will give him some needed
> socialization and will keep a tie to the school so
> if I want him to go back at some point the
> transition will be easier. Plus I'm going to keep
> signing him up for the sports teams so he'll get to
> see his friends. We live in a small rural town so we
> don't have a lot of opportunities for extra
> curricular type activities.
>
> Am I wrong to take him out so it's easier? Should
> I just keep having him go until he learns to follow
> their rules and not get in trouble? Will he learn to
> behave better if I keep him home? Or does he need to
> go to school to learn to follow rules?
>
> I'm just really confused at this point and could
> use some suggestions. He's a very bright child and I
> want to make sure he's challenged at home and still
> "learns". I just don't want his self esteem damaged
> because he is constantly getting in trouble.
>
> Somebody help!
>
>
>
> Ellen LaFleche-Christian
> Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts
> http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
> Receive a recipe every day
> http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
>
>
>
>
> ---------------------------------
> Love cheap thrills? Enjoy PC-to-Phone calls to 30+
> countries for just 2¢/min with Yahoo! Messenger with
> Voice.
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been
> removed]
>
>
Do You Yahoo!?
Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around
http://mail.yahoo.com
---------------------------------
YAHOO! GROUPS LINKS
Visit your group "unschoolingbasics" on the web.
To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
[email protected]
Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms of Service.
---------------------------------
Ellen LaFleche-Christian
Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
Receive a recipe every day http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
---------------------------------
How low will we go? Check out Yahoo! Messengers low PC-to-Phone call rates.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Ellen Christian
Thanks so much Karen. Your post really made me feel better!
Ellen
Karen Rose <winterrose715@...> wrote:
I am new to unschooling......I took my son out just over a month ago.
Ellen LaFleche-Christian
Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
Receive a recipe every day http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
---------------------------------
Talk is cheap. Use Yahoo! Messenger to make PC-to-Phone calls. Great rates starting at 1¢/min.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Ellen
Karen Rose <winterrose715@...> wrote:
I am new to unschooling......I took my son out just over a month ago.
Ellen LaFleche-Christian
Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
Receive a recipe every day http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
---------------------------------
Talk is cheap. Use Yahoo! Messenger to make PC-to-Phone calls. Great rates starting at 1¢/min.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Maisha Khalfani
<<Many colleges won't accept a GED. He will be back in public school by 7th or 8th grade so he can go to high school and then to college. He really needs to be taught the same style of math that our school system uses in order to transition easily back into public school.>>
Hi Ellen - I'm kind of new to the whole idea of radical unschooling, but this piece of your email caught my eye. There are many colleges that accept a GED, and I believe all community colleges do. You don't "have to" send him back to school to go to college.
Maisha
http://khalfanifamilyadventures.blogspot.com/<http://khalfanifamilyadventures.blogspot.com/>
"Don't be afraid of showing affection. Be warm and tender, thoughtful and affectionate. Mankind is more helped by sympathy than by service. Love is more than money, and a kind word will give more pleasure than a present."
~ Jean Baptiste Lacordaire
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Hi Ellen - I'm kind of new to the whole idea of radical unschooling, but this piece of your email caught my eye. There are many colleges that accept a GED, and I believe all community colleges do. You don't "have to" send him back to school to go to college.
Maisha
http://khalfanifamilyadventures.blogspot.com/<http://khalfanifamilyadventures.blogspot.com/>
"Don't be afraid of showing affection. Be warm and tender, thoughtful and affectionate. Mankind is more helped by sympathy than by service. Love is more than money, and a kind word will give more pleasure than a present."
~ Jean Baptiste Lacordaire
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Priscilla Sanstead
I'm in California, and you can get in our local
college, Antelope Valley College, as a "Special Admit"
student no matter what your age, with no GED, ACT, or
SAT. You just can't register for classes until open
registration, which can be a bummer if the classes you
want are full. But you can take the Ca High School
Proficiency Exam (CHSPE) to get around that. We know a
boy that has been up there since he was 9 or 10. After
you complete a certain number of hours, you can
transfer to a 4 year school, and no one will then
really care how you got your pre-college education.
All that will matter is your college grades and
activities.
Check with some small colleges near you and see what
they offer. UC Riverside (metro LA) has a special page
on-line about unschoolers' portfolios with examples of
what they want. Do an on-line search to find all the
colleges that welcome homeschoolers. They have found
how mature and self-motivated they are. I know a
professor who says he can pretty much tell in class
who the homeschoolersunschoolers are.
We used to live in FL, and I checked there UWF and
PJC) just being curious, and it's really different
from CA. One of the many reasons we moved to CA.....
Priscilla
--- Maisha Khalfani <earthspirit393@...>
wrote:
Do You Yahoo!?
Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around
http://mail.yahoo.com
college, Antelope Valley College, as a "Special Admit"
student no matter what your age, with no GED, ACT, or
SAT. You just can't register for classes until open
registration, which can be a bummer if the classes you
want are full. But you can take the Ca High School
Proficiency Exam (CHSPE) to get around that. We know a
boy that has been up there since he was 9 or 10. After
you complete a certain number of hours, you can
transfer to a 4 year school, and no one will then
really care how you got your pre-college education.
All that will matter is your college grades and
activities.
Check with some small colleges near you and see what
they offer. UC Riverside (metro LA) has a special page
on-line about unschoolers' portfolios with examples of
what they want. Do an on-line search to find all the
colleges that welcome homeschoolers. They have found
how mature and self-motivated they are. I know a
professor who says he can pretty much tell in class
who the homeschoolersunschoolers are.
We used to live in FL, and I checked there UWF and
PJC) just being curious, and it's really different
from CA. One of the many reasons we moved to CA.....
Priscilla
--- Maisha Khalfani <earthspirit393@...>
wrote:
> <<Many colleges won't accept a GED. He will be backhttp://khalfanifamilyadventures.blogspot.com/<http://khalfanifamilyadventures.blogspot.com/>
> in public school by 7th or 8th grade so he can go to
> high school and then to college. He really needs to
> be taught the same style of math that our school
> system uses in order to transition easily back into
> public school.>>
>
> Hi Ellen - I'm kind of new to the whole idea of
> radical unschooling, but this piece of your email
> caught my eye. There are many colleges that accept
> a GED, and I believe all community colleges do. You
> don't "have to" send him back to school to go to
> college.
>
> Maisha
>
> "Don't be afraid of showing affection. Be warm and__________________________________________________
> tender, thoughtful and affectionate. Mankind is more
> helped by sympathy than by service. Love is more
> than money, and a kind word will give more pleasure
> than a present."
> ~ Jean Baptiste Lacordaire
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been
> removed]
>
>
Do You Yahoo!?
Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around
http://mail.yahoo.com
Ellen Christian
I know that community colleges will generally accept a GED but I don't want to limit him. I'd feel horrible if the college he really wanted to go to he couldn't get into because of a decision I made. This is the best of both worlds for us.
Maisha Khalfani <earthspirit393@...> wrote: Hi Ellen - I'm kind of new to the whole idea of radical unschooling, but this piece of your email caught my eye. There are many colleges that accept a GED, and I believe all community colleges do. You don't "have to" send him back to school to go to college.
Ellen LaFleche-Christian
Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
Receive a recipe every day http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
---------------------------------
How low will we go? Check out Yahoo! Messengers low PC-to-Phone call rates.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Maisha Khalfani <earthspirit393@...> wrote: Hi Ellen - I'm kind of new to the whole idea of radical unschooling, but this piece of your email caught my eye. There are many colleges that accept a GED, and I believe all community colleges do. You don't "have to" send him back to school to go to college.
Ellen LaFleche-Christian
Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
Receive a recipe every day http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
---------------------------------
How low will we go? Check out Yahoo! Messengers low PC-to-Phone call rates.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Priscilla Sanstead
Ellen,
It looks like you have all you bases covered! Hang in
there! Education options are changing all over
America, and something may change by the time you get
"there". You son is lucky to have you advocating for
him. The schools like everybody to be the same. Have
you found the chart that compares "Gifted" and
"Smart"? That's what most gifted programs seem to be
for---the smart, COMPLIANT, kid.
As for choosing friends, with him home with you a lot,
you'll be able to communicate your values and help him
learn how to choose friends as well as be a friend.
Our motto growing up was "You are known by the company
you keep", one component of finding a friend. I know
there is as "American Girl" book about friendship, you
could read it and put a "boy" spin on it for him.
Hang in there. You are doing the right thing. We're
still having some difficult times with friends. It can
be very difficult to find them when you are smart.
Check out the yahoo group OGTOC
(Our_Online_Gifted_Conference) with Elizabeth
Meckstroth. They just had an online conference about
Social Relationships and Friendships for gifted kids.
What great information! The links are still there. I
was wondering if we were being snobs, but gifted kids
just look at the world in a different way!
Are you in the yahoo Mensa group? (They don't make you
take a test to join the chat group.) Is there a
Vermont/New England Gifted group? How do those Sudbury
kids get into college? How about Hampshire College in
Mass.? I've heard you design you own major there.
Priscilla
--- Ellen Christian <scentednights2002@...>
wrote:
__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around
http://mail.yahoo.com
It looks like you have all you bases covered! Hang in
there! Education options are changing all over
America, and something may change by the time you get
"there". You son is lucky to have you advocating for
him. The schools like everybody to be the same. Have
you found the chart that compares "Gifted" and
"Smart"? That's what most gifted programs seem to be
for---the smart, COMPLIANT, kid.
As for choosing friends, with him home with you a lot,
you'll be able to communicate your values and help him
learn how to choose friends as well as be a friend.
Our motto growing up was "You are known by the company
you keep", one component of finding a friend. I know
there is as "American Girl" book about friendship, you
could read it and put a "boy" spin on it for him.
Hang in there. You are doing the right thing. We're
still having some difficult times with friends. It can
be very difficult to find them when you are smart.
Check out the yahoo group OGTOC
(Our_Online_Gifted_Conference) with Elizabeth
Meckstroth. They just had an online conference about
Social Relationships and Friendships for gifted kids.
What great information! The links are still there. I
was wondering if we were being snobs, but gifted kids
just look at the world in a different way!
Are you in the yahoo Mensa group? (They don't make you
take a test to join the chat group.) Is there a
Vermont/New England Gifted group? How do those Sudbury
kids get into college? How about Hampshire College in
Mass.? I've heard you design you own major there.
Priscilla
--- Ellen Christian <scentednights2002@...>
wrote:
> Hi Priscilla - Thanks for your email. I'll try to=== message truncated ===
> address your thoughts.
>
> 1. I've always told the school he was bored but
> they didn't believe me. He's a very bright kid. At
> 7 he was reading the Harry Potter books. I feel I
> can address that best at home.
>
> 2. In Vermont, if you home school, you don't get
> a high school diploma unless you graduate high
> school or use a curriculum that offers a diploma.
> Many colleges won't accept a GED. He will be back in
> public school by 7th or 8th grade so he can go to
> high school and then to college. He really needs to
> be taught the same style of math that our school
> system uses in order to transition easily back into
> public school. He does quite well in classes - it's
> the unstructured times he has problems in.
>
> 3. Socialization to me means learning social
> skills. He's immature for his age. He has a tendancy
> to lie and he unfortunately seems to choose the
> worst possible friends to play with at school - ones
> who are similarly ostricized because they don't
> behave. I want him to learn to interact with other
> kids his age properly in a team type environment
> like organized sports so he learns self discipline
> and team work. I can also work on changing the
> behaviors we don't approve of like lying at home and
> I can work on bolstering his self esteem as well.
>
> 4. I have not yet found any home school groups in
> my area. There were two 7th grade girls who were
> home schooled last year but one moved out of town
> and one went back to public school to prepare for
> high school. I understand there are a few families
> that home school about 35 minutes from here but I
> haven't found out their names yet or what their kids
> ages are. We are in a small rural town. Our
> librarian is the mom of the 7th grade girl who just
> went back to public school after being home
> schooled. She's also involved in our gifted and
> talented program at the elementary school. She's
> going to see if she can find out about any people in
> the area that might home school.
>
> I talked to him about home schooling him and his
> response was "awesome" so I guess that won't be an
> issue LOL. He loved the idea of going to school for
> math to see his friends.
>
> He really loves to learn and loves to read. He
> loves Harry Potter. He can identify almost any
> country on the globe. He's interested in dinosaurs,
> planets, magnets, volcanoes LOL and lots more
> things.
>
> I have a few books requested on interlibrary loan
> by John Holt and I've been to a bunch of unschooling
> websites. My next hurdle is filling out this
> paperwork the state says I need to submit.
>
> thanks!
> Ellen
>
> Priscilla Sanstead <bobcatpris2000@...> wrote:
> Ellen,
> My daughter went through the same thing 5 years ago
> at
> age 8---bus misbehaving, losing recess, forced (that
> alphabetical order thing) to sit by a bully at lunch
> who kept telling her that her face was ugly!
>
> Many thoughts:
>
> He may be bored,and not have ADHD if there is such a
> thing. They wanted my daughter drugged and I did
> it!!!---to my eternal regret. Smart kids can have a
> lots of trouble sitting still, they have too much
> going on in their brain. If so, unschooling is the
> answer. He also may be "wiggling" more than other
> kids
> to get attention---being bored and wanting something
> to do, and the other kids may enjoy it!
>
> Why do you want to take him back for math and have
> all
> those same things happen to him? Just because you
> aren't good at math is OK. We don't "teach" our
> children. we facilitate their learning. If he likes
> math, he will be fine. There are so many math
> computer
> games and web sites (Living Math and their chat
> forum
> are fabulous!), and you could get an older kid to
> tutor him. He could also tutor a younger child.
>
> Socialization---what exactly do you mean by that
> really? There are a lots of bad things that kids
> pick
> up at school---from the teachers (self esteem about
> not fitting in the box, being different even if you
> are smart or slow, to name a few). Of course the
> kids
> have bullying/name calling issues, different values
> from yours, etc, and it only gets worse as the years
> go by. Does he want to take piano or karate or
> archery?
>
> Are there any homeschooling groups around? There may
> be homeschoolers, even if there are no groups. The
> librarians may know---they see the kids not in
> public
> school. Speaking of the library, could you help the
> librarians start an after-school interest group to
> meet other kids---Yu-Gi-Oh cards or something like
> that?
>
> I took neighborhood kids on field trips with us (or
> we
> went alone). We saw kids with school groups being
> herded, hollered at, having to take notes for a
> paper
> to be graded, hardly getting to see anything, while
> we
> looked at our leisure at what WE wanted to look at,
> then picnic'd, laughed, and played til long after
> they
> were back at school. You know how pointless it is to
> try to cram knowledge into someone that not
> interested
> (either they're having a bad day, or they aren't
> developmentally ready for it, or it's a subject they
> hate and always will). There is just no retention if
> you aren't interested. Google " 'rithmetic and
> Sudbury" and read about kids who begged to learn
> math,
> and learn it at breakneck speed.
>
> Have you asked him about learning at home instead of
> school? He may be thrilled!
>
> Have you read a lot? ---books, on-line, Sandra Dodd,
> John Gatto, old posts on unschoolingbasics, etc.
>
> Best of luck to you. On-line support groups help
> soooo
> much.
>
> Priscilla
>
> --- Ellen Christian <scentednights2002@...>
> wrote:
>
> > My son is 8 and is having some problems in school
> > with social skills, etc. His grades are very good
> > As/Bs and he likes school but he has ADHD and just
> > isn't fitting into the school's "box" very well
> > during their unstructured times (recess, lunch,
> > etc.) He does OK in classes but cannot take the
> bus
> > and keeps getting in trouble in unstructured
> times.
> > My thought is that by homeschooling him, it will
> be
> > easier because I can give him the one on one
> > attention he needs. BUT what if he doesn't want me
> > to homeschool him? I plan on keeping him in math
> > class at school since I hate math & he does quite
> > well at it. It will give him some needed
> > socialization and will keep a tie to the school so
> > if I want him to go back at some point the
> > transition will be easier. Plus I'm going to keep
> > signing him up for the sports teams so he'll get
> to
> > see his friends. We live in a small rural town so
> we
> > don't have a lot of opportunities for extra
> > curricular type activities.
> >
> > Am I wrong to take him out so it's easier?
> Should
> > I just keep having him go until he learns to
> follow
> > their rules and not get in trouble? Will he learn
> to
> > behave better if I keep him home? Or does he need
> to
> > go to school to learn to follow rules?
> >
> > I'm just really confused at this point and could
> > use some suggestions. He's a very bright child and
> I
> > want to make sure he's challenged at home and
> still
> > "learns". I just don't want his self esteem
> damaged
> > because he is constantly getting in trouble.
> >
> > Somebody help!
> >
>
__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around
http://mail.yahoo.com
Ren Allen
"I am just awful
in math and science so I felt going with a tutor was a great idea for us."
I'm beginning to wonder if folks are reading the list guidelines and
description lately? Tutoring is not necessary for your child to learn
"math" and "science". In fact, segregating his learning by subject is
not going to help unschooling work very well in your home at all!
And making a child think they need a tutor because Mom isn't "good" at
a topic is really not helpful. Schooling didn't help you understand
those topics so you're going to school your child in them? Not a great
way to get to unschooling.
Let go of the idea of subjects and lessons. LIVE and in the living
there will be plenty of opportunities for you BOTH to learn all sorts
of things related to science and math (and so much more).
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
in math and science so I felt going with a tutor was a great idea for us."
I'm beginning to wonder if folks are reading the list guidelines and
description lately? Tutoring is not necessary for your child to learn
"math" and "science". In fact, segregating his learning by subject is
not going to help unschooling work very well in your home at all!
And making a child think they need a tutor because Mom isn't "good" at
a topic is really not helpful. Schooling didn't help you understand
those topics so you're going to school your child in them? Not a great
way to get to unschooling.
Let go of the idea of subjects and lessons. LIVE and in the living
there will be plenty of opportunities for you BOTH to learn all sorts
of things related to science and math (and so much more).
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
Ren Allen
"Am I wrong to take him out so it's easier? Should I just keep having
him go until he learns to follow their rules and not get in trouble?"
Seriously? You seriously think that damaging a child's self esteem and
learning to bow to authority is somehow healthy? Yikes.
"Will he learn to behave better if I keep him home?"
What are your expectations of "behavior"? Maybe less expectations and
more joy in his life, more letting him simply BE who he is today,
would be a load of stress off you both!
"Or does he need to go to school to learn to follow rules?"
You're in a group that is advocating freedom. You have joined a list
that says you don't need school to learn, you don't need rules to live
well and you are damaging your child by doing those very things.
Do you really think we're going to say "SURE, leave your kid in school
to learn how to follow rules, THEN unschool him"?
WHY does he need to learn how to follow the rules? Maybe the rules
don't make sense. Maybe school is all about conforming people to a
little box he doesn't fit into. Maybe learning to trust him and his
intelligence will help you step onto the unschooling path.
Unschooling is all about relationships and trust. You can't get trust
by hurting someone on purpose to teach them some lesson. You aren't
going to get to unschooling until you take the leap and choose to trust.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
him go until he learns to follow their rules and not get in trouble?"
Seriously? You seriously think that damaging a child's self esteem and
learning to bow to authority is somehow healthy? Yikes.
"Will he learn to behave better if I keep him home?"
What are your expectations of "behavior"? Maybe less expectations and
more joy in his life, more letting him simply BE who he is today,
would be a load of stress off you both!
"Or does he need to go to school to learn to follow rules?"
You're in a group that is advocating freedom. You have joined a list
that says you don't need school to learn, you don't need rules to live
well and you are damaging your child by doing those very things.
Do you really think we're going to say "SURE, leave your kid in school
to learn how to follow rules, THEN unschool him"?
WHY does he need to learn how to follow the rules? Maybe the rules
don't make sense. Maybe school is all about conforming people to a
little box he doesn't fit into. Maybe learning to trust him and his
intelligence will help you step onto the unschooling path.
Unschooling is all about relationships and trust. You can't get trust
by hurting someone on purpose to teach them some lesson. You aren't
going to get to unschooling until you take the leap and choose to trust.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
Ellen Christian
Ren - I'm sorry if my questions offended you. I was writing from the heart and sharing my concerns and worries. I have done a fair amount of reading on unschooling but that doesn't meat that I don't have days where I wonder if I'm doing the right thing. I was looking for support through my post, not criticism or insults. Maybe I chose the wrong group to find that support in.
Ren Allen <starsuncloud@...> wrote:
Do you really think we're going to say "SURE, leave your kid in school
to learn how to follow rules, THEN unschool him"?
Ellen LaFleche-Christian
Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
Receive a recipe every day http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
---------------------------------
How low will we go? Check out Yahoo! Messengers low PC-to-Phone call rates.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Ren Allen <starsuncloud@...> wrote:
Do you really think we're going to say "SURE, leave your kid in school
to learn how to follow rules, THEN unschool him"?
Ellen LaFleche-Christian
Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
Receive a recipe every day http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
---------------------------------
How low will we go? Check out Yahoo! Messengers low PC-to-Phone call rates.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Ellen Christian
Thanks, Priscilla. I appreciate your support. I'm not familiar with that chart or the groups you mentioned but I'll check them out :)
Priscilla Sanstead <bobcatpris2000@...> wrote: Ellen,
It looks like you have all you bases covered! Hang in
there!
Ellen LaFleche-Christian
Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
Receive a recipe every day http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
---------------------------------
How low will we go? Check out Yahoo! Messengers low PC-to-Phone call rates.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Priscilla Sanstead <bobcatpris2000@...> wrote: Ellen,
It looks like you have all you bases covered! Hang in
there!
Ellen LaFleche-Christian
Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
Receive a recipe every day http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
---------------------------------
How low will we go? Check out Yahoo! Messengers low PC-to-Phone call rates.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Malinda Mills
<< Am I wrong to take him out so it's easier? Should I just keep having him go until he learns to follow their rules and not get in trouble? Will he learn to behave better if I keep him home? Or does he need to go to school to learn to follow rules?>>
Ellen, I took my son (9) out of school this past Nov. He sounds so much like your son! Good grades but was in trouble constantly if given any free time. And with him finishing his work before all the other kids he had A LOT of free time...not to mention lunch, recess, etc..
The school was desperate that I slap a label on him, so much so that during our first phone conversation his teacher told me to get him to a doctor! My poor kid ended up at a psychologist in order to learn coping strategies for third grade! As time went on the school came up with wilder and wilder claims...to the point of making Tristan out to be some sort of bipolar sociopath, and that couldn't be farther from the truth.
Tristan simply didn't fit into the box the school was trying to force him into. Instead of learning to "follow the rules" Tristan's behavior became worse and worse every year (his behavior was often dependent upon his teacher). It came to a point where they were treating him incredibly unfairly...punishing him much more severely than other students. For example...if Tristan and another child were caught running in the halls, Tristan would be sent to the principal while the other child simply had to put his head on his desk. It was no wonder that he acted out more and more as the school year went on!
I know if I had kept in school it would have totally crushed his spirit by the end of this school year. Now I am slowly trying to undo all the damage that the school caused.
Unschooling is not necessarily easier than sending your child off to school. I am at the ready 24/7 to help Tristan with whatever he needs...be it researching something on the internet, running to get supplies for a project, or simply being there for moral support while he plays a video game.
Malinda
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Ellen, I took my son (9) out of school this past Nov. He sounds so much like your son! Good grades but was in trouble constantly if given any free time. And with him finishing his work before all the other kids he had A LOT of free time...not to mention lunch, recess, etc..
The school was desperate that I slap a label on him, so much so that during our first phone conversation his teacher told me to get him to a doctor! My poor kid ended up at a psychologist in order to learn coping strategies for third grade! As time went on the school came up with wilder and wilder claims...to the point of making Tristan out to be some sort of bipolar sociopath, and that couldn't be farther from the truth.
Tristan simply didn't fit into the box the school was trying to force him into. Instead of learning to "follow the rules" Tristan's behavior became worse and worse every year (his behavior was often dependent upon his teacher). It came to a point where they were treating him incredibly unfairly...punishing him much more severely than other students. For example...if Tristan and another child were caught running in the halls, Tristan would be sent to the principal while the other child simply had to put his head on his desk. It was no wonder that he acted out more and more as the school year went on!
I know if I had kept in school it would have totally crushed his spirit by the end of this school year. Now I am slowly trying to undo all the damage that the school caused.
Unschooling is not necessarily easier than sending your child off to school. I am at the ready 24/7 to help Tristan with whatever he needs...be it researching something on the internet, running to get supplies for a project, or simply being there for moral support while he plays a video game.
Malinda
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Ren Allen
"Ren - I'm sorry if my questions offended you."
Not offended at all. Surprised.
I didn't think the group lent itself to giving the impression that
anyone here would say "yeah, leave your kid in school until he gets
those rules down" that's all.
This IS a group to get started...it's pretty gentle too. I've just
been reading a lot of advice that is really pointedly AGAINST
unschooling principles and I don't want the list to get away from it's
purpose.
We're not here to help you force your child to follow rules, or attend
any soul crushing school. We're here to help people get to
unschooling. I'm assuming all here have unschooling as the goal.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
Not offended at all. Surprised.
I didn't think the group lent itself to giving the impression that
anyone here would say "yeah, leave your kid in school until he gets
those rules down" that's all.
This IS a group to get started...it's pretty gentle too. I've just
been reading a lot of advice that is really pointedly AGAINST
unschooling principles and I don't want the list to get away from it's
purpose.
We're not here to help you force your child to follow rules, or attend
any soul crushing school. We're here to help people get to
unschooling. I'm assuming all here have unschooling as the goal.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
Malinda
> Unschooling is not necessarily easier than sending your child off toschool. I am at the ready 24/7 to help Tristan with whatever he
needs...be it researching something on the internet, running to get
supplies for a project, or simply being there for moral support while
he plays a video game.
>I should have added that it is MUCH more rewarding to unschool Tristan
than it is to simply send him off to school everyday. I have seen
such a turnaround in his attitude towards so many things...friends,
family, learning, and life in general. He now leads a more joyful and
peaceful life. So do I, for that matter...unschooling spills over to
all members of the family. Our household is much happier and peaceful
now.
Malinda
Joyce Fetteroll
On Apr 8, 2006, at 9:31 PM, Ellen Christian wrote:
assume unschoolers have different hopes and dreams for their kids.
The above says that we are all limiting our kids to a few inferior
colleges and we don't care.
Assume we have the same values and *ask* how we're getting around the
problems rather than telling us something that isn't true! ;-)
The big colleges and particularly the exclusive colleges all know how
to handle homeschoolers and unschoolers since they've gotten
applications from them for years. They *know* we don't have school
transcripts and GEDs. Some will accept SATs and ACTs. (Though there's
a movement among some colleges to not rely on those for anyone,
schooled or homeschooled.) What they will accept is some kind of
portfolio/resume of what the child has been doing. They don't expect
to see a recreation of school. They want to see what the child has
been doing, the activities they've been pursuing, the things that
will make them a good candidate for being passionate about pursuing
interests in college.
The more obscure colleges don't have the experience with homeschooled
applicants so don't know what to do with them. But we can educate
them! If you find out what unschoolers need to get into Harvard and
say it's good enough to be considered for Harvard, what can they say ;-)
to school and doesn't need math the way schools teach it.
you ask the questions you need to get to the information you don't
have about unschooling! :-)
So what you're saying is similar to saying the best way to learn math
is to throw a bunch of kids together who don't know math and let them
figure it out on their own.
While a lot of parents would agree with the theory that kids need to
be thrown together in order to learn "social skills" nothing could be
further from the truth. It's more like throwing a bunch of kids into
the pool to see which ones survive. People who see the kids who've
successfully figured out social rules from being throw in assume it's
the throwing in that gave that to the. They either ignore the ones
who are drowning and pretending or blame the kids for being bad or
incompetent.
The truth is that the kids who do well at social skills under such
harsh conditions are ones who naturally have that ability.
Read about Gardner's Theory of Multiple Intelligences:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Multiple_intelligence
Bring him home and let him unfold at his natural pace. See what he
does right and help him figure out some strategies for the parts that
are harder for him. Ask here how others have handled the situations.
protect himself rather than something bad that he's doing. Kids don't
want to be "bad". They want love and acceptance and peace and
security. But sometimes we and the situations we put them in create
roadblocks and they just don't know what else to do.
I'm not saying accept lying but figure out why he feels lying is a
better option than the truth. What bad/uncomfortable thing -- thing
that *he* sees as bad -- will happen to him if he tells the truth?
What is he trying to avoid?
I don't think you can bolster his self esteem by not approving of
him. Assume he's doing the best he can with the skills and abilities
he has in the situation he's in and help him find ways to make better
choices by removing roadblocks that are preventing that.
you in the directions of VT resources:
[email protected]
Sandra also has unschooling links from her website:
http://sandradodd.com/unschooling
and National Home Educators Network also has state listings (not
exclusively unschooling)"
http://www.nhen.org
library and "crunchy" places like whole food groceries, coops and so
on. Consider putting up signs of your own. If you build it, they will
come :-)
expected and you weren't enjoying it. Would it help you learn better
if your husband made you go? Would it improve your relationship with
him?
Thing is, your son didn't even sign up for school. It wasn't
something he researched and decided to try.
too. Ask how unschoolers get what their kids need and want.
The thing is it often *sounds* like we don't care because we're
coming at learning from a totally different point of view! Rather
than trying to get information into our kids we're doing what we can
to help them reach out for what fascinates them. My daughter has done
very little formal math (and what she did, she didn't like!) and yet
at 13 started sitting in on the college math classes her father
teaches (Statistics, Contemporary Math and Algebra) and is among the
top kids on tests if not the top kid.
High tests scores are not the goal of unschooling! But her lack of
formal math belies the "common wisdom" that kids need 12 years of
math in order to prepare for college. My daughter is doing better
than students who have *had* 12 years of school math.
Rather than thinking in terms of what you want to get into him --
social skills, math, and anything else --, think in terms of what he
is interested in and help him get that. Social skills will come as a
side effect of doing what he enjoys, from being in situations where
he *wants* to be and wants to do better.
Joyce
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> I know that community colleges will generally accept a GED but IIt will help you get the answers to help your son if you *don't*
> don't want to limit him. I'd feel horrible if the college he really
> wanted to go to he couldn't get into because of a decision I made.
> This is the best of both worlds for us.
assume unschoolers have different hopes and dreams for their kids.
The above says that we are all limiting our kids to a few inferior
colleges and we don't care.
Assume we have the same values and *ask* how we're getting around the
problems rather than telling us something that isn't true! ;-)
The big colleges and particularly the exclusive colleges all know how
to handle homeschoolers and unschoolers since they've gotten
applications from them for years. They *know* we don't have school
transcripts and GEDs. Some will accept SATs and ACTs. (Though there's
a movement among some colleges to not rely on those for anyone,
schooled or homeschooled.) What they will accept is some kind of
portfolio/resume of what the child has been doing. They don't expect
to see a recreation of school. They want to see what the child has
been doing, the activities they've been pursuing, the things that
will make them a good candidate for being passionate about pursuing
interests in college.
The more obscure colleges don't have the experience with homeschooled
applicants so don't know what to do with them. But we can educate
them! If you find out what unschoolers need to get into Harvard and
say it's good enough to be considered for Harvard, what can they say ;-)
> He really needs to be taught the same style of math that our schoolSince he doesn't need an official diploma he doesn't need to return
> system uses in order to transition easily back into public school.
> He does quite well in classes - it's the unstructured times he has
> problems in.
to school and doesn't need math the way schools teach it.
> I want him to learn to interact with other kids his age properly inAssume we care about our kids socialization too! It really will help
> a team type environment like organized sports so he learns self
> discipline and team work.
you ask the questions you need to get to the information you don't
have about unschooling! :-)
So what you're saying is similar to saying the best way to learn math
is to throw a bunch of kids together who don't know math and let them
figure it out on their own.
While a lot of parents would agree with the theory that kids need to
be thrown together in order to learn "social skills" nothing could be
further from the truth. It's more like throwing a bunch of kids into
the pool to see which ones survive. People who see the kids who've
successfully figured out social rules from being throw in assume it's
the throwing in that gave that to the. They either ignore the ones
who are drowning and pretending or blame the kids for being bad or
incompetent.
The truth is that the kids who do well at social skills under such
harsh conditions are ones who naturally have that ability.
Read about Gardner's Theory of Multiple Intelligences:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Multiple_intelligence
Bring him home and let him unfold at his natural pace. See what he
does right and help him figure out some strategies for the parts that
are harder for him. Ask here how others have handled the situations.
> I can also work on changing the behaviors we don't approve of likeI think it will help you to see lying as a strategy he's developed to
> lying at home and I can work on bolstering his self esteem as well.
protect himself rather than something bad that he's doing. Kids don't
want to be "bad". They want love and acceptance and peace and
security. But sometimes we and the situations we put them in create
roadblocks and they just don't know what else to do.
I'm not saying accept lying but figure out why he feels lying is a
better option than the truth. What bad/uncomfortable thing -- thing
that *he* sees as bad -- will happen to him if he tells the truth?
What is he trying to avoid?
I don't think you can bolster his self esteem by not approving of
him. Assume he's doing the best he can with the skills and abilities
he has in the situation he's in and help him find ways to make better
choices by removing roadblocks that are preventing that.
> They seem to want specific books & topics that I will cover nextJoin the New England Unschooling group and they can help you or point
> year and I'm unsure how to fill out the paperwork correctly & still
> be able to unschool.
you in the directions of VT resources:
[email protected]
Sandra also has unschooling links from her website:
http://sandradodd.com/unschooling
and National Home Educators Network also has state listings (not
exclusively unschooling)"
http://www.nhen.org
> I have not yet found any home school groups in my area.Also try checking the bulletin boards for unschooling groups at the
library and "crunchy" places like whole food groceries, coops and so
on. Consider putting up signs of your own. If you build it, they will
come :-)
> Am I wrong to take him out so it's easier?What if you'd signed up for a class that wasn't at all what you
expected and you weren't enjoying it. Would it help you learn better
if your husband made you go? Would it improve your relationship with
him?
Thing is, your son didn't even sign up for school. It wasn't
something he researched and decided to try.
> I want to make sure he's challenged at home and still "learns".Again, assume we want to help our kids to the best of their abilities
too. Ask how unschoolers get what their kids need and want.
The thing is it often *sounds* like we don't care because we're
coming at learning from a totally different point of view! Rather
than trying to get information into our kids we're doing what we can
to help them reach out for what fascinates them. My daughter has done
very little formal math (and what she did, she didn't like!) and yet
at 13 started sitting in on the college math classes her father
teaches (Statistics, Contemporary Math and Algebra) and is among the
top kids on tests if not the top kid.
High tests scores are not the goal of unschooling! But her lack of
formal math belies the "common wisdom" that kids need 12 years of
math in order to prepare for college. My daughter is doing better
than students who have *had* 12 years of school math.
Rather than thinking in terms of what you want to get into him --
social skills, math, and anything else --, think in terms of what he
is interested in and help him get that. Social skills will come as a
side effect of doing what he enjoys, from being in situations where
he *wants* to be and wants to do better.
Joyce
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
aplan4life
Joyce,
This answer alone that you provided to Ellen, wow, I just cannot
express how badly that I needed to read something like that...I feel a
major shift coming on. I've already let up tremendously on how we
homeschool but this here MAY BE the key, at least for me in just
totally embracing unschooling.
Thanks even though your impact on me was inadvertant.
~Sandy Winn
This answer alone that you provided to Ellen, wow, I just cannot
express how badly that I needed to read something like that...I feel a
major shift coming on. I've already let up tremendously on how we
homeschool but this here MAY BE the key, at least for me in just
totally embracing unschooling.
Thanks even though your impact on me was inadvertant.
~Sandy Winn
> It will help you get the answers to help your son if you *don't*
> assume unschoolers have different hopes and dreams for their kids.
> The above says that we are all limiting our kids to a few inferior
> colleges and we don't care.
>
> Assume we have the same values and *ask* how we're getting around the
> problems rather than telling us something that isn't true! ;-)
>
> The big colleges and particularly the exclusive colleges all know how
> to handle homeschoolers and unschoolers since they've gotten
> applications from them for years. They *know* we don't have school
> transcripts and GEDs. Some will accept SATs and ACTs. (Though there's
> a movement among some colleges to not rely on those for anyone,
> schooled or homeschooled.) What they will accept is some kind of
> portfolio/resume of what the child has been doing. They don't expect
> to see a recreation of school. They want to see what the child has
> been doing, the activities they've been pursuing, the things that
> will make them a good candidate for being passionate about pursuing
> interests in college.
>
> The more obscure colleges don't have the experience with homeschooled
> applicants so don't know what to do with them. But we can educate
> them! If you find out what unschoolers need to get into Harvard and
> say it's good enough to be considered for Harvard, what can they say
Ellen Christian
Wow that does sound a lot like David. I did convince the teachers to allow him to do word search puzzles when he finishes his work early. He loves to do them but there are still so many "free times" left that he gets in trouble in.
Malinda Mills <saprswife@...> wrote: Ellen, I took my son (9) out of school this past Nov. He sounds so much like your son! Good grades but was in trouble constantly if given any free time. And with him finishing his work before all the other kids he had A LOT of free time...not to mention lunch, recess, etc..
Ellen LaFleche-Christian
Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
Receive a recipe every day http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
---------------------------------
Talk is cheap. Use Yahoo! Messenger to make PC-to-Phone calls. Great rates starting at 1¢/min.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Malinda Mills <saprswife@...> wrote: Ellen, I took my son (9) out of school this past Nov. He sounds so much like your son! Good grades but was in trouble constantly if given any free time. And with him finishing his work before all the other kids he had A LOT of free time...not to mention lunch, recess, etc..
Ellen LaFleche-Christian
Moonlight Creations Jewelry & Gifts http://moonlight-creations-jewelry.com
Receive a recipe every day http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ARecipeADay/
---------------------------------
Talk is cheap. Use Yahoo! Messenger to make PC-to-Phone calls. Great rates starting at 1¢/min.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]