re: unparenting criticism
frozenandcold
<<<<I'm wondering if she's right regarding TV & computer>>>>
Well, my son is on the computer 24/7 pretty much and, as far as I can
tell, he is pretty darn healthy and has absolutely no problems with
his eyes. What I do know is that he knows a lot more about computers
than I do and has to help me quite often. He would not have learned
all that if I had limited his computer time. He LOVES computers and
is constantly learning new things that he can do with them. That
might be the way he makes his living some day!
Heidi
Well, my son is on the computer 24/7 pretty much and, as far as I can
tell, he is pretty darn healthy and has absolutely no problems with
his eyes. What I do know is that he knows a lot more about computers
than I do and has to help me quite often. He would not have learned
all that if I had limited his computer time. He LOVES computers and
is constantly learning new things that he can do with them. That
might be the way he makes his living some day!
Heidi
Cindy Kee
I am not an unschooling mom yet, and I am curious. With unschooling, and no
limits on the computer, do you find that he goes through spurts of spending
all his time on the PC, and then other times when he is doing other stuff?
Is the other stuff that he is interested in learning mostly learned from the
PC - researching the internet, etc.?
Even though I am not unschooling yet and I am still trying to learn how it
can really work, I do not have any specific limits - at least time-based
limits - on my 7 yo sons when it comes to the XBox and the PC. Because they
are still in public school and have homework, I do have "rules" about not
being allowed to play XBox if it's time for homework. I do give them the
choice of homework before or after dinner, and if they choose after dinner,
then they often play XBox before dinner. Then after dinner, no TV or video
games until the homework is finished. With them being in public school
still, I see no other way to work this out - if I let them guide themselves,
their choice would be to never do the homework - of course. The whole
homework issue is one of the reasons I hate public school - especially for
kids this young!
My goal this year, preferrably in the first half of this year, is to pull
them out of ps and start homeschooling of somekind - eclectic, or
unschooling, or some other level that I find that will work for me. That's
why I am trying to learn more here.
Cindy Kee in NV
Mom to fraternal twin boys, 7yo
limits on the computer, do you find that he goes through spurts of spending
all his time on the PC, and then other times when he is doing other stuff?
Is the other stuff that he is interested in learning mostly learned from the
PC - researching the internet, etc.?
Even though I am not unschooling yet and I am still trying to learn how it
can really work, I do not have any specific limits - at least time-based
limits - on my 7 yo sons when it comes to the XBox and the PC. Because they
are still in public school and have homework, I do have "rules" about not
being allowed to play XBox if it's time for homework. I do give them the
choice of homework before or after dinner, and if they choose after dinner,
then they often play XBox before dinner. Then after dinner, no TV or video
games until the homework is finished. With them being in public school
still, I see no other way to work this out - if I let them guide themselves,
their choice would be to never do the homework - of course. The whole
homework issue is one of the reasons I hate public school - especially for
kids this young!
My goal this year, preferrably in the first half of this year, is to pull
them out of ps and start homeschooling of somekind - eclectic, or
unschooling, or some other level that I find that will work for me. That's
why I am trying to learn more here.
Cindy Kee in NV
Mom to fraternal twin boys, 7yo
On 2/22/06, frozenandcold <fivefreebirds@...> wrote:
>
> <<<<I'm wondering if she's right regarding TV & computer>>>>
>
> Well, my son is on the computer 24/7 pretty much and, as far as I can
> tell, he is pretty darn healthy and has absolutely no problems with
> his eyes. What I do know is that he knows a lot more about computers
> than I do and has to help me quite often. He would not have learned
> all that if I had limited his computer time. He LOVES computers and
> is constantly learning new things that he can do with them. That
> might be the way he makes his living some day!
>
> Heidi
>
>
>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Paige
I have girls, and I know that might make my experience different
from someone who has only boys, but my kids have NEVER asked to play
on the computer. When we buy them a new game they will try it out,
then never go back to it. It's the same with their games, they each
have a game boy, but only played with it the first day, then it has
just sat untouched. They do watch quite a bit of TV, but while they
are watching they are nearly always doing something else at the same
time, usually art kinds of things, sometimes even reading.
I have to cut this short, I'm being called on to put a piggy bank
back together, they are calling me a pig doctor...I wonder if I
should be insulted? :)
Paige
With unschooling, and no
from someone who has only boys, but my kids have NEVER asked to play
on the computer. When we buy them a new game they will try it out,
then never go back to it. It's the same with their games, they each
have a game boy, but only played with it the first day, then it has
just sat untouched. They do watch quite a bit of TV, but while they
are watching they are nearly always doing something else at the same
time, usually art kinds of things, sometimes even reading.
I have to cut this short, I'm being called on to put a piggy bank
back together, they are calling me a pig doctor...I wonder if I
should be insulted? :)
Paige
With unschooling, and no
> limits on the computer, do you find that he goes through spurts ofspending
> all his time on the PC, and then other times when he is doingother stuff?
Deb
--- In [email protected], "Cindy Kee"
<RobMikeMom@...> wrote:
interests are. A new video game/computer game will usually lead to a
spike as he dives into that game. Then it levels off. Right now,
he's heavily into the Lost in Time Spongebob episodes and figures.
No different really than an adult's behavior - we find a new hobby
or a new type of food (sushi, Thai, whatever) and we put a lot of
energy into it for a while. Sometimes it remains a priority item and
sometimes it sinks back a bit into one among many interests. His
learning is absorbed from everything - printed materials, Internet
(although he doesn't do a lot of the navigating, he'll ask us to
look up stuff for him or we'll just go find stuff to match with
something he's asked about), talking with us and others - lots of
questions and discussions.
--Deb
<RobMikeMom@...> wrote:
>unschooling, >and no
> I am not an unschooling mom yet, and I am curious. With
> limits on the computer, do you find that he goes through spurts ofI have a 7 1/2 yr old DS and yes, there are spurts in where his
>spending
> all his time on the PC, and then other times when he is doing
>other >stuff?
> Is the other stuff that he is interested in learning mostly
>learned >from the
> PC - researching the internet, etc.?
interests are. A new video game/computer game will usually lead to a
spike as he dives into that game. Then it levels off. Right now,
he's heavily into the Lost in Time Spongebob episodes and figures.
No different really than an adult's behavior - we find a new hobby
or a new type of food (sushi, Thai, whatever) and we put a lot of
energy into it for a while. Sometimes it remains a priority item and
sometimes it sinks back a bit into one among many interests. His
learning is absorbed from everything - printed materials, Internet
(although he doesn't do a lot of the navigating, he'll ask us to
look up stuff for him or we'll just go find stuff to match with
something he's asked about), talking with us and others - lots of
questions and discussions.
--Deb
sahm2cody
Sandra,
I think, as parents, we all go through periods where we question what
we're doing and how we're doing it, regardless of our
parenting/homeschooling style. You are definitely not alone there!
As for the issues that your friend raised, only your family can decide
what fits best for them. There are many unschoolers who limit TV and
computer time, or who help to oversee what types of food are consumed,
until they feel their children have enough information to make the
decisions on their own. Their are also many radical unschoolers who
impose no limits on what their children do or eat, and that works
perfectly for their families.
One way isn't necessarily better than the other. The real "point" is
that each family is doing what is right for their family at that
moment.
~Carri Ann~
mom to Star Wars/lego obsessed 10 y/o
I think, as parents, we all go through periods where we question what
we're doing and how we're doing it, regardless of our
parenting/homeschooling style. You are definitely not alone there!
As for the issues that your friend raised, only your family can decide
what fits best for them. There are many unschoolers who limit TV and
computer time, or who help to oversee what types of food are consumed,
until they feel their children have enough information to make the
decisions on their own. Their are also many radical unschoolers who
impose no limits on what their children do or eat, and that works
perfectly for their families.
One way isn't necessarily better than the other. The real "point" is
that each family is doing what is right for their family at that
moment.
~Carri Ann~
mom to Star Wars/lego obsessed 10 y/o
Bill and Tanna Biston
Hi. I agree with Carri Ann in that we all doubt ourselves as parents. I think it is great to have forums to discuss these things & learn from each other. At the same time we need to take or discard advice as it pertains to our family because as parents we know our children best. It seems if you try to please everyone...you end up pleasing no one! Do what FEELS right to you & your family. Take care! Tanna
sahm2cody <CXFiles@...> wrote:
Sandra,
I think, as parents, we all go through periods where we question what
we're doing and how we're doing it, regardless of our
parenting/homeschooling style. You are definitely not alone there!
As for the issues that your friend raised, only your family can decide
what fits best for them. There are many unschoolers who limit TV and
computer time, or who help to oversee what types of food are consumed,
until they feel their children have enough information to make the
decisions on their own. Their are also many radical unschoolers who
impose no limits on what their children do or eat, and that works
perfectly for their families.
One way isn't necessarily better than the other. The real "point" is
that each family is doing what is right for their family at that
moment.
~Carri Ann~
mom to Star Wars/lego obsessed 10 y/o
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sahm2cody <CXFiles@...> wrote:
Sandra,
I think, as parents, we all go through periods where we question what
we're doing and how we're doing it, regardless of our
parenting/homeschooling style. You are definitely not alone there!
As for the issues that your friend raised, only your family can decide
what fits best for them. There are many unschoolers who limit TV and
computer time, or who help to oversee what types of food are consumed,
until they feel their children have enough information to make the
decisions on their own. Their are also many radical unschoolers who
impose no limits on what their children do or eat, and that works
perfectly for their families.
One way isn't necessarily better than the other. The real "point" is
that each family is doing what is right for their family at that
moment.
~Carri Ann~
mom to Star Wars/lego obsessed 10 y/o
SPONSORED LINKS
Secondary school education Graduate school education Home school education Graduate school education online High school education Middle school education
---------------------------------
YAHOO! GROUPS LINKS
Visit your group "unschoolingbasics" on the web.
To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
[email protected]
Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms of Service.
---------------------------------
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
frozenandcold
<<<<<<<I am not an unschooling mom yet, and I am curious. With
unschooling, and no
limits on the computer, do you find that he goes through spurts of
spending
all his time on the PC, and then other times when he is doing other
stuff?
Is the other stuff that he is interested in learning mostly learned
from the
PC - researching the internet, etc.?>>>>>>>
With Kevin he spends most of his free time on the computer, it doesn't
really go in spurts. He loves the computer and yes, he learns most of
what he learns from the computer. Some of the stuff that he tells us
is amazing and every time I ask him "Where did you learn that?", he
will almost always say that he read it on the computer. He is always
looking up stuff that interests him and even reads the news.
Right now we are on a year long RV trip and are doing LOTS of
interesting things so it is not like he is on the computer ALL the
time but when we are in the motorhome he is mostly on the computer and
when we were living in a house, if we were at home just hanging he was
on his computer. If I put something out that is just so interesting
that he can't pass it up he would join us. He is an extremely
interesting, level-headed kid and I absolutely do not worry AT ALL!
You can read his interest/passion list at 5freebirds.com . Click on
the about us page and his list is there.
Heidi
unschooling, and no
limits on the computer, do you find that he goes through spurts of
spending
all his time on the PC, and then other times when he is doing other
stuff?
Is the other stuff that he is interested in learning mostly learned
from the
PC - researching the internet, etc.?>>>>>>>
With Kevin he spends most of his free time on the computer, it doesn't
really go in spurts. He loves the computer and yes, he learns most of
what he learns from the computer. Some of the stuff that he tells us
is amazing and every time I ask him "Where did you learn that?", he
will almost always say that he read it on the computer. He is always
looking up stuff that interests him and even reads the news.
Right now we are on a year long RV trip and are doing LOTS of
interesting things so it is not like he is on the computer ALL the
time but when we are in the motorhome he is mostly on the computer and
when we were living in a house, if we were at home just hanging he was
on his computer. If I put something out that is just so interesting
that he can't pass it up he would join us. He is an extremely
interesting, level-headed kid and I absolutely do not worry AT ALL!
You can read his interest/passion list at 5freebirds.com . Click on
the about us page and his list is there.
Heidi
frozenandcold
I have been giving this whole subject a lot of thought in the last
12 hours. It is one that pops up a lot with those that don't really
understand radical unschooling, that is why this list exists, so we
can expand our viewpoints and understand radical unschooling better!!
To those that just hear about radical unschooling it might sound a
little like unparenting. I remember when Ren first started
presenting me with the radical unschooling philosophy I would think
to myself that she was just being a lazy parent. It wasn't until I
saw it put into practice that I realized it is not unparenting, it
is about letting go of ARBITRARY rules, letting go of controling our
children. It is about trusting our children, having a joyful
relationship with our children, being involved with our children's
lives in a very direct way, HELPING our children make their OWN
choices by being there for them ALL the time.
I could go on and on! I pulled this quote off of a website of Robyn
Posin's that I think is very good on this subject:
<<<<<<*This deep self, our wise and knowing simple animal being,
when not interfered with -unerringly, instinctively moves us
toward that which grows and nurtures us. Just as unfailing, it
moves us away from all that endangers us on any level.
Robyn Posin>>>>>
On the subject of food, TV, etc. , limiting our children in
anything. When we give that control to our children they learn to
listen to their bodies and they don't hoard like they will never
have that privilege again. They know that they have control over
those things and they do that which makes them feel good and
nurtured. Just yesterday I asked Kevin if he wanted me to make him
some coffee (he drinks it every so often) and he said "No, I don't
think I am going to drink it anymore because it makes me feel queazy
and it kind of gives me a stomache ache." My kids often turn down
sweets that other kids would gorge on because they know that if they
want it later they can have it. The trick is to make sure that
healthy stuff is out and easy to grab because they will eat that
stuff if it is accesssible. The problem is that most parents don't
make the healthy stuff easy to grab and go.
The same goes with TV, computer, etc. Make your home interesting
and fun and then let them choose. Sometimes they will choose TV or
computer or games for several days but, most likely, if the world
around them is interesting they will choose other things too and if
they don't it is because it is fulfilling some need they have. We
grew up without TV and my kids didn't have TV until about 4 years
ago. When we first got it they watched it 24/7 for about a year.
When they realized that it wasn't going to go away and they could
watch it whenever they wanted to, they quit watching it 24/7 and
went on to other intersting things.
Anyway, hope that helps a little.
Heidi
12 hours. It is one that pops up a lot with those that don't really
understand radical unschooling, that is why this list exists, so we
can expand our viewpoints and understand radical unschooling better!!
To those that just hear about radical unschooling it might sound a
little like unparenting. I remember when Ren first started
presenting me with the radical unschooling philosophy I would think
to myself that she was just being a lazy parent. It wasn't until I
saw it put into practice that I realized it is not unparenting, it
is about letting go of ARBITRARY rules, letting go of controling our
children. It is about trusting our children, having a joyful
relationship with our children, being involved with our children's
lives in a very direct way, HELPING our children make their OWN
choices by being there for them ALL the time.
I could go on and on! I pulled this quote off of a website of Robyn
Posin's that I think is very good on this subject:
<<<<<<*This deep self, our wise and knowing simple animal being,
when not interfered with -unerringly, instinctively moves us
toward that which grows and nurtures us. Just as unfailing, it
moves us away from all that endangers us on any level.
Robyn Posin>>>>>
On the subject of food, TV, etc. , limiting our children in
anything. When we give that control to our children they learn to
listen to their bodies and they don't hoard like they will never
have that privilege again. They know that they have control over
those things and they do that which makes them feel good and
nurtured. Just yesterday I asked Kevin if he wanted me to make him
some coffee (he drinks it every so often) and he said "No, I don't
think I am going to drink it anymore because it makes me feel queazy
and it kind of gives me a stomache ache." My kids often turn down
sweets that other kids would gorge on because they know that if they
want it later they can have it. The trick is to make sure that
healthy stuff is out and easy to grab because they will eat that
stuff if it is accesssible. The problem is that most parents don't
make the healthy stuff easy to grab and go.
The same goes with TV, computer, etc. Make your home interesting
and fun and then let them choose. Sometimes they will choose TV or
computer or games for several days but, most likely, if the world
around them is interesting they will choose other things too and if
they don't it is because it is fulfilling some need they have. We
grew up without TV and my kids didn't have TV until about 4 years
ago. When we first got it they watched it 24/7 for about a year.
When they realized that it wasn't going to go away and they could
watch it whenever they wanted to, they quit watching it 24/7 and
went on to other intersting things.
Anyway, hope that helps a little.
Heidi
reina scheiber-loeis
i'm reina my ds is nikolas 17 mo old.
i'm trying to figure out what unschooling really is, i know the principles
(i think) but i would like to learn more about what happens in day-to-day
unschooling life. so far i've only read john holt's "how children learn" and
i've been to a john taylor gatto talk.i've also been trying to read
"unconditional parenting" but haven't gotten very far.
i'm slowly going through some of the links in the files section to learn
more... i'll probably lurk more often than not to kinda learn the ropes.
i think my biggest concern is my own doubts about the success of
unschooling. i come from a fairly strict asian community where excellence in
school is coveted. grades were very important and even now i have to remind
myself to not compare my child to other children his age. so really my
problem starts with me :o) i need to break down my own prejudices and
beliefs and figure out what's best for our family in the long run!
thanks for reading!
reina.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
i'm trying to figure out what unschooling really is, i know the principles
(i think) but i would like to learn more about what happens in day-to-day
unschooling life. so far i've only read john holt's "how children learn" and
i've been to a john taylor gatto talk.i've also been trying to read
"unconditional parenting" but haven't gotten very far.
i'm slowly going through some of the links in the files section to learn
more... i'll probably lurk more often than not to kinda learn the ropes.
i think my biggest concern is my own doubts about the success of
unschooling. i come from a fairly strict asian community where excellence in
school is coveted. grades were very important and even now i have to remind
myself to not compare my child to other children his age. so really my
problem starts with me :o) i need to break down my own prejudices and
beliefs and figure out what's best for our family in the long run!
thanks for reading!
reina.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Lesa McMahon-Lowe
Thanks for sharing your website, Heidi. So is the Ren that's around here on
the group your sister?
Lesa
-------Original Message-------
From: frozenandcold
Date: 02/24/06 19:29:03
To: [email protected]
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] re: unparenting criticism
You can read his interest/passion list at 5freebirds.com . Click on
the about us page and his list is there.
Heidi
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
the group your sister?
Lesa
-------Original Message-------
From: frozenandcold
Date: 02/24/06 19:29:03
To: [email protected]
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] re: unparenting criticism
You can read his interest/passion list at 5freebirds.com . Click on
the about us page and his list is there.
Heidi
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Ren Allen
"So is the Ren that's around here on
the group your sister?"
Yes. The Ren that started this group with Kelly Lovejoy is Heidi's
sister.:) I'm pretty lucky.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
the group your sister?"
Yes. The Ren that started this group with Kelly Lovejoy is Heidi's
sister.:) I'm pretty lucky.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
Lesa McMahon-Lowe
are any of your other sisters on here, too?
Lesa
-hoping that unschooling will rub off on my sister and she'll keep that
beautiful little boy of hers home with her when "school" time comes
-------Original Message-------
From: Ren Allen
Date: 02/25/06 16:49:01
To: [email protected]
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] unparenting criticism
"So is the Ren that's around here on
the group your sister?"
Yes. The Ren that started this group with Kelly Lovejoy is Heidi's
sister.:) I'm pretty lucky.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Lesa
-hoping that unschooling will rub off on my sister and she'll keep that
beautiful little boy of hers home with her when "school" time comes
-------Original Message-------
From: Ren Allen
Date: 02/25/06 16:49:01
To: [email protected]
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] unparenting criticism
"So is the Ren that's around here on
the group your sister?"
Yes. The Ren that started this group with Kelly Lovejoy is Heidi's
sister.:) I'm pretty lucky.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
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school education
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Visit your group "unschoolingbasics" on the web.
To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
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Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms of Service.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Ren Allen
"are any of your other sisters on here, too?"
Actually, nobody else in our family even homeschools.
Our younger sister works full time and has my niece in preschool. It's
sad, but I know that is their choice for right now, so no sense in
saying anything at this point. She's a very gentle mama and tries to
honor Rylee's choices as much as possible.
We hope she'll change her mind one day and let Rylee unschool of course.:)
My adopted sibs should not homeschool their kids! I would encourage
them not to if they asked. sigh.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
Actually, nobody else in our family even homeschools.
Our younger sister works full time and has my niece in preschool. It's
sad, but I know that is their choice for right now, so no sense in
saying anything at this point. She's a very gentle mama and tries to
honor Rylee's choices as much as possible.
We hope she'll change her mind one day and let Rylee unschool of course.:)
My adopted sibs should not homeschool their kids! I would encourage
them not to if they asked. sigh.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com