mamaaj2000

I'm curious about what people's fears are/were about starting to
unschool. My top one is I'm afraid I don't have the energy to provide
enough activities, social life, opportunities, whatever for my kids.

Not that that's the only fear I have, but I just want to get the ball
rolling on what we fear and how we deal with it.

And if you have any extra energy, I'll give you my mailing address!

--aj

Kelly Lenhart

>I'm curious about what people's fears are/were about starting to
>unschool. My top one is I'm afraid I don't have the energy to provide
>enough activities, social life, opportunities, whatever for my kids.

I'd say that is mine, still a year later. We do ok, and it's WAY BETTER
than any other way we've lived. But I know that I am just not doing enough
strewing, interacting, etc. I'm hoping that when the kids are older (they
are 8, 3 and 10 mos) it will get easier. Hard to do anything which requires
much set up/length for the big one when the little ones are around.

Kelly

sandrewmama

on 6/24/04 10:32 PM, Kelly Lenhart at mina@... wrote:

> We do ok, and it's WAY BETTER than any other way we've lived. But I know
that I am just not doing enough strewing, interacting, etc.

I'm new to this list and have heard the word *strewing* used a few times.
I'd like to know more about this concept. Anyone?

Chris

Christine Evenson

I used to try to do all the activities, opportunities, playing
going to the library, co-op and such, PLUS doing a curriculum. I think NOW
I will have enough energy to do all the fun things and not doing the
curriculum on top of that. It will be easier now and we can spend more time
on all the fun things.

Wendy E

Leaving things around for your kids to discover.

http://sandradodd.com/strew/sandra

--- In [email protected], sandrewmama
<sandrewmama@m...> wrote:
> on 6/24/04 10:32 PM, Kelly Lenhart at mina@m... wrote:
>
> > We do ok, and it's WAY BETTER than any other way we've lived.
But I know
> that I am just not doing enough strewing, interacting, etc.
>
> I'm new to this list and have heard the word *strewing* used a few
times.
> I'd like to know more about this concept. Anyone?
>
> Chris

Sherri-Lee Pressman

So I have been meaning to ask... what is strewing??

Thanks,

Sherri-Lee
Looking for safe and natural health products?
http://www.aloeessence.com
----- Original Message -----
From: Kelly Lenhart
To: [email protected]
Sent: Thursday, June 24, 2004 8:32 PM
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] Fears?


>I'm curious about what people's fears are/were about starting to
>unschool. My top one is I'm afraid I don't have the energy to provide
>enough activities, social life, opportunities, whatever for my kids.

I'd say that is mine, still a year later. We do ok, and it's WAY BETTER
than any other way we've lived. But I know that I am just not doing enough
strewing, interacting, etc. I'm hoping that when the kids are older (they
are 8, 3 and 10 mos) it will get easier. Hard to do anything which requires
much set up/length for the big one when the little ones are around.

Kelly


Yahoo! Groups Sponsor
ADVERTISEMENT





------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yahoo! Groups Links

a.. To visit your group on the web, go to:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingbasics/

b.. To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
[email protected]

c.. Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms of Service.



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Wendy E

Leaving things around for your kids to discover.

http://sandradodd.com/strew/sandra


--- In [email protected], Sherri-Lee Pressman
<sherri--lee@s...> wrote:
> So I have been meaning to ask... what is strewing??
>
> Thanks,
>
> Sherri-Lee
> Looking for safe and natural health products?
> http://www.aloeessence.com
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: Kelly Lenhart
> To: [email protected]
> Sent: Thursday, June 24, 2004 8:32 PM
> Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] Fears?
>
>
> >I'm curious about what people's fears are/were about starting to
> >unschool. My top one is I'm afraid I don't have the energy to
provide
> >enough activities, social life, opportunities, whatever for my
kids.
>
> I'd say that is mine, still a year later. We do ok, and it's
WAY BETTER
> than any other way we've lived. But I know that I am just not
doing enough
> strewing, interacting, etc. I'm hoping that when the kids are
older (they
> are 8, 3 and 10 mos) it will get easier. Hard to do anything
which requires
> much set up/length for the big one when the little ones are
around.
>
> Kelly
>
>
> Yahoo! Groups Sponsor
> ADVERTISEMENT
>
>
>
>
>
> -------------------------------------------------------------------
-----------
> Yahoo! Groups Links
>
> a.. To visit your group on the web, go to:
> http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingbasics/
>
> b.. To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
> [email protected]
>
> c.. Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms
of Service.
>
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Robyn Coburn

<<<I'm new to this list and have heard the word *strewing* used a few times.
I'd like to know more about this concept. Anyone?>>>

There are two sides to strewing.

One is putting stuff that is likely to be, or even merely possibly,
interesting into the visual, auditory or philosophical radar/proximity of
our kids.

The other is to remain detached from the outcome. Don't get bent out of
shape if the answer is a resounding disinterest (might be temporary). Don't
become invested in the idea that some stuff you dig is more valuable than
other stuff.

Strewing is in addition to the interests that the kids discover on their
own.

Robyn L. Coburn


---
Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free.
Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com).
Version: 6.0.707 / Virus Database: 463 - Release Date: 6/15/2004

G&M Contracting Inc., Kenneth Gillilan

aj,
My only existing fear is how to report to my state. Unschooling means,
to me, no testing, no curriculum, no school. I could see how people think
that using curriculum/testing would make their lives easier, but I'm not
willing to do that to my kids. For example, in Vermont, I'm choosing the
option of doing a portfolio with a summary of what we did for the year. My
5 yo hates to be read to and doesn't look at books on his own. How do I
fill the reading subject requirement? I'm going to need to be creative in
that department and that's what scares me the most.
I'm not worried about how or what he or any of my children will learn,
I'm 100% confident that they will learn what they want, when they want and
will feel good about it along the way.

AnnMarie
-----Original Message-----
From: mamaaj2000 [mailto:mamaaj2000@...]
Sent: Thursday, June 24, 2004 10:32 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Fears?


I'm curious about what people's fears are/were about starting to
unschool. My top one is I'm afraid I don't have the energy to provide
enough activities, social life, opportunities, whatever for my kids.

Not that that's the only fear I have, but I just want to get the ball
rolling on what we fear and how we deal with it.

And if you have any extra energy, I'll give you my mailing address!

--aj


Yahoo! Groups Sponsor
ADVERTISEMENT





----------------------------------------------------------------------------
--
Yahoo! Groups Links

a.. To visit your group on the web, go to:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingbasics/

b.. To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
[email protected]

c.. Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms of Service.



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

sandrewmama

on 6/24/04 11:19 PM, Wendy E at mommytoluc@... wrote:

> Leaving things around for your kids to discover.
>
> http://sandradodd.com/strew/sandra
>

Oh, I didn't know there was a specific term for something I've always done.

Sandra Dodd's article seems focused on small children. Does anybody have
examples of ways they strew for older kids?

Here is one I did recently. We live in a small house and Ds was in the
bathroom with the door closed. The bathroom is located just across the hall
from my bedroom where my computer is located. I was checking out free sheet
music websites and came across some with Midi files so you could listen to
the piece. I clicked on *The Enterainer*. As soon as he heard it, the
bathroom door flew open and Ds was very interested in printing off a variety
of music to practice his clarinet and propose a duet with a friend of his
that plays the piano.

Any other stories??

Chris

pam sorooshian

I rent movies I think they'll like and learn from and leave them around
and the kids often watch them. I take dvd's and cd's along in the car.

So I guess that is a form of strewing for my teenagers.

-pam

On Jun 25, 2004, at 7:34 AM, sandrewmama wrote:

> Does anybody have
> examples of ways they strew for older kids?
National Home Education Network
<www.NHEN.org>
Serving the entire homeschooling community since 1999
through information, networking and public relations.

Sherri-Lee Pressman

Thanks. saw the same question asked just after I posted mine:-)



Sherri-Lee



_____

From: Wendy E [mailto:mommytoluc@...]
Sent: Thursday, June 24, 2004 11:11 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Re: Fears?



Leaving things around for your kids to discover.

http://sandradodd.com/strew/sandra


--- In [email protected], Sherri-Lee Pressman
<sherri--lee@s...> wrote:
> So I have been meaning to ask... what is strewing??
>
> Thanks,
>
> Sherri-Lee
> Looking for safe and natural health products?
> http://www.aloeessence.com
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: Kelly Lenhart
> To: [email protected]
> Sent: Thursday, June 24, 2004 8:32 PM
> Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] Fears?
>
>
> >I'm curious about what people's fears are/were about starting to
> >unschool. My top one is I'm afraid I don't have the energy to
provide
> >enough activities, social life, opportunities, whatever for my
kids.
>
> I'd say that is mine, still a year later. We do ok, and it's
WAY BETTER
> than any other way we've lived. But I know that I am just not
doing enough
> strewing, interacting, etc. I'm hoping that when the kids are
older (they
> are 8, 3 and 10 mos) it will get easier. Hard to do anything
which requires
> much set up/length for the big one when the little ones are
around.
>
> Kelly
>
>
> Yahoo! Groups Sponsor
> ADVERTISEMENT
>
>
>
>
>
> -------------------------------------------------------------------
-----------
> Yahoo! Groups Links
>
> a.. To visit your group on the web, go to:
> http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingbasics/
>
> b.. To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
> [email protected]
>
> c.. Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms
of Service.
>
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]






Yahoo! Groups Sponsor



ADVERTISEMENT

<http://us.ard.yahoo.com/SIG=129kktp8j/M=298184.5022502.6152625.3001176/D=gr
oups/S=1705081972:HM/EXP=1088230262/A=2164339/R=0/SIG=11e2d64in/*http:/www.n
etflix.com/Default?mqso=60183348> click here



<http://us.adserver.yahoo.com/l?M=298184.5022502.6152625.3001176/D=groups/S=
:HM/A=2164339/rand=753200414>



_____

Yahoo! Groups Links

* To visit your group on the web, go to:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingbasics/

* To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
[email protected]
<mailto:[email protected]?subject=Unsubscribe>

* Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo!
<http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/> Terms of Service.



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

Whenever I come across a website that I think one of my kids will enjoy I email
the link to them. Sometimes I surf a lot so I can send quite a few.

Blessings,
Jamye

Sherri-Lee Pressman

My biggest fear is that I don't really like to "play" her games all that
much. I enjoy doing puzzles and board games and outings and picnics and
adventures. But when wants me to do her imagination play I have a hard time.
You might laugh at this given my current issues of giving up control, but I
find her damned controlling! LOL. It sounds funny even to me:-)



She wants to tell me what to say and do and act and how to be and logically
I know that it is her game and she is just wanting some control perhaps over
me as well as her play. But I have a hard time being told what to do and
then being yelled at if I don't do exactly what she thought I should even
though she didn't articulate it, you know?



Now sure how to approach this... and do I really need to do this kind of
play to meet my obligations (I know some of you don't like this word, but it
doesn't bother me) to her? She goes to my dh now, who will play until she is
screaming and yelling because she isn't getting exactly what she wants and
then he quits.



I am very left brain and she seems to be very right brain so that might
potentially be our conflict I guess.



The other fear is that I will suffer post partum again with my second like I
did with her and I was just horrible to be around and if I did I think I
would consider preschool for her because it would be better for her than
being with me. Or/and that I won't have enough energy to provide all the
outlets she needs to explore and learn in this world.



I think that is it. probably not, with more time I am sure I would think of
more fears:-). but for now that is what comes to mind.



Sherri-Lee



_____

From: mamaaj2000 [mailto:mamaaj2000@...]
Sent: Thursday, June 24, 2004 7:32 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Fears?



I'm curious about what people's fears are/were about starting to
unschool. My top one is I'm afraid I don't have the energy to provide
enough activities, social life, opportunities, whatever for my kids.

Not that that's the only fear I have, but I just want to get the ball
rolling on what we fear and how we deal with it.

And if you have any extra energy, I'll give you my mailing address!

--aj






Yahoo! Groups Sponsor



ADVERTISEMENT

<http://us.ard.yahoo.com/SIG=129cjsheu/M=298184.5022502.6152625.3001176/D=gr
oups/S=1705081972:HM/EXP=1088217131/A=2164339/R=0/SIG=11e2d64in/*http:/www.n
etflix.com/Default?mqso=60183348> click here



<http://us.adserver.yahoo.com/l?M=298184.5022502.6152625.3001176/D=groups/S=
:HM/A=2164339/rand=271013082>



_____

Yahoo! Groups Links

* To visit your group on the web, go to:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingbasics/

* To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
[email protected]
<mailto:[email protected]?subject=Unsubscribe>

* Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo!
<http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/> Terms of Service.



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Betsy Varga

Did you know that Mass General Hospital has a medical department designed
specifically to help woman that are depressed while pregnant and/or
depressed after the pregnancy? I found the information online while looking
for other info on the web. There is also a book called Parenting Well When
You are Depressed. The book helps you set up a game plan for when you are
depressed. Maybe it would help to write out a plan of things you can do to
make your life simpler if you do become depressed after the second child
arrives. You are sure to have many creative and positive ideas now, while
you are still feeling better to prepare for a time you are not doing well.
This would include stocking up on things to make meals easier and developing
a safety net, so to speak, of family and friends that can give you some
assistance if needed.


-----Original Message-----
From: Sherri-Lee Pressman [mailto:sherri--lee@...]
Sent: Saturday, June 26, 2004 4:44 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: RE: [unschoolingbasics] Fears?


My biggest fear is that I don't really like to "play" her games all that
much. I enjoy doing puzzles and board games and outings and picnics and
adventures. But when wants me to do her imagination play I have a hard time.
You might laugh at this given my current issues of giving up control, but I
find her damned controlling! LOL. It sounds funny even to me:-)



She wants to tell me what to say and do and act and how to be and logically
I know that it is her game and she is just wanting some control perhaps over
me as well as her play. But I have a hard time being told what to do and
then being yelled at if I don't do exactly what she thought I should even
though she didn't articulate it, you know?



Now sure how to approach this... and do I really need to do this kind of
play to meet my obligations (I know some of you don't like this word, but it
doesn't bother me) to her? She goes to my dh now, who will play until she is
screaming and yelling because she isn't getting exactly what she wants and
then he quits.



I am very left brain and she seems to be very right brain so that might
potentially be our conflict I guess.



The other fear is that I will suffer post partum again with my second like I
did with her and I was just horrible to be around and if I did I think I
would consider preschool for her because it would be better for her than
being with me. Or/and that I won't have enough energy to provide all the
outlets she needs to explore and learn in this world.



I think that is it. probably not, with more time I am sure I would think of
more fears:-). but for now that is what comes to mind.



Sherri-Lee



_____

From: mamaaj2000 [mailto:mamaaj2000@...]
Sent: Thursday, June 24, 2004 7:32 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Fears?



I'm curious about what people's fears are/were about starting to
unschool. My top one is I'm afraid I don't have the energy to provide
enough activities, social life, opportunities, whatever for my kids.

Not that that's the only fear I have, but I just want to get the ball
rolling on what we fear and how we deal with it.

And if you have any extra energy, I'll give you my mailing address!

--aj






Yahoo! Groups Sponsor



ADVERTISEMENT

<http://us.ard.yahoo.com/SIG=129cjsheu/M=298184.5022502.6152625.3001176/D=gr
oups/S=1705081972:HM/EXP=1088217131/A=2164339/R=0/SIG=11e2d64in/*http:/www.n
etflix.com/Default?mqso=60183348> click here



<http://us.adserver.yahoo.com/l?M=298184.5022502.6152625.3001176/D=groups/S=
:HM/A=2164339/rand=271013082>



_____

Yahoo! Groups Links

* To visit your group on the web, go to:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingbasics/

* To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
[email protected]
<mailto:[email protected]?subject=Unsubscribe>

* Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo!
<http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/> Terms of Service.



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]





Yahoo! Groups Links

Sherri-Lee Pressman

Hi Betsy,



Thanks for the suggestions. I am in Canada so can't go to Mass:-) And am
very alternative in my approach to health. The thing that got me last time
was I did not know I was depressed until my dd was 2 years old. And all the
naturopaths I had seen in that time did not diagnose it either. Finally I
read a one page article in Readers Digest and could not believe it was about
me! Not your classic depression symptoms, not eating or starving, sleeping
or not, or sad or weepy, but angry and feeling very violent and resentful
and miserable. It was horrible. When I remember some of the things I said I
could cry.



I will look into that book though and see if I can make a game plan just in
case.



I found a fabulous Chinese medicine doctor who finally treated me and fixed
it all up. He assures me that this post partum tea from China that I will
start to take 7 days post partum for one month will balance my hormones and
I will not have depression this time. Plus I know more what to look for and
will run back to him at the first glimpse that something isn't right.



As for cooking, my dh is fabulous about cooking and did all the cooking,
cleaning, shopping and laundry for months after dd#1 was born.



Thanks again for the suggestions I will look for the book,


Sherri-Lee



_____

From: Betsy Varga [mailto:blvarga@...]
Sent: Saturday, June 26, 2004 2:24 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: RE: [unschoolingbasics] Fears?



Did you know that Mass General Hospital has a medical department designed
specifically to help woman that are depressed while pregnant and/or
depressed after the pregnancy? I found the information online while looking
for other info on the web. There is also a book called Parenting Well When
You are Depressed. The book helps you set up a game plan for when you are
depressed. Maybe it would help to write out a plan of things you can do to
make your life simpler if you do become depressed after the second child
arrives. You are sure to have many creative and positive ideas now, while
you are still feeling better to prepare for a time you are not doing well.
This would include stocking up on things to make meals easier and developing
a safety net, so to speak, of family and friends that can give you some
assistance if needed.


-----Original Message-----
From: Sherri-Lee Pressman [mailto:sherri--lee@...]
Sent: Saturday, June 26, 2004 4:44 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: RE: [unschoolingbasics] Fears?


My biggest fear is that I don't really like to "play" her games all that
much. I enjoy doing puzzles and board games and outings and picnics and
adventures. But when wants me to do her imagination play I have a hard time.
You might laugh at this given my current issues of giving up control, but I
find her damned controlling! LOL. It sounds funny even to me:-)



She wants to tell me what to say and do and act and how to be and logically
I know that it is her game and she is just wanting some control perhaps over
me as well as her play. But I have a hard time being told what to do and
then being yelled at if I don't do exactly what she thought I should even
though she didn't articulate it, you know?



Now sure how to approach this... and do I really need to do this kind of
play to meet my obligations (I know some of you don't like this word, but it
doesn't bother me) to her? She goes to my dh now, who will play until she is
screaming and yelling because she isn't getting exactly what she wants and
then he quits.



I am very left brain and she seems to be very right brain so that might
potentially be our conflict I guess.



The other fear is that I will suffer post partum again with my second like I
did with her and I was just horrible to be around and if I did I think I
would consider preschool for her because it would be better for her than
being with me. Or/and that I won't have enough energy to provide all the
outlets she needs to explore and learn in this world.



I think that is it. probably not, with more time I am sure I would think of
more fears:-). but for now that is what comes to mind.



Sherri-Lee



_____

From: mamaaj2000 [mailto:mamaaj2000@...]
Sent: Thursday, June 24, 2004 7:32 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Fears?



I'm curious about what people's fears are/were about starting to
unschool. My top one is I'm afraid I don't have the energy to provide
enough activities, social life, opportunities, whatever for my kids.

Not that that's the only fear I have, but I just want to get the ball
rolling on what we fear and how we deal with it.

And if you have any extra energy, I'll give you my mailing address!

--aj






Yahoo! Groups Sponsor



ADVERTISEMENT

<http://us.ard.yahoo.com/SIG=129cjsheu/M=298184.5022502.6152625.3001176/D=gr
oups/S=1705081972:HM/EXP=1088217131/A=2164339/R=0/SIG=11e2d64in/*http:/www.n
etflix.com/Default?mqso=60183348> click here



<http://us.adserver.yahoo.com/l?M=298184.5022502.6152625.3001176/D=groups/S=
:HM/A=2164339/rand=271013082>



_____

Yahoo! Groups Links

* To visit your group on the web, go to:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingbasics/

* To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
[email protected]
<mailto:[email protected]?subject=Unsubscribe>

* Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo!
<http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/> Terms of Service.



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]





Yahoo! Groups Links










Yahoo! Groups Sponsor



ADVERTISEMENT

<http://us.ard.yahoo.com/SIG=129467km3/M=295196.4901138.6071305.3001176/D=gr
oups/S=1705081972:HM/EXP=1088371447/A=2128215/R=0/SIG=10se96mf6/*http:/compa
nion.yahoo.com> click here



<http://us.adserver.yahoo.com/l?M=295196.4901138.6071305.3001176/D=groups/S=
:HM/A=2128215/rand=343510875>



_____

Yahoo! Groups Links

* To visit your group on the web, go to:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingbasics/

* To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
[email protected]
<mailto:[email protected]?subject=Unsubscribe>

* Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo!
<http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/> Terms of Service.



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

My biggest fear right now is that I'm not doing enough cool stuff with them.
You know, things to spark an interest in something. Lately I'm not sure we are
doing all that much at all. I keep telling myself that if I was doing
school-at-home we would be in the midst of summer break and it wouldn't matter!
But still I feel the need to do something. I also get tense if we do
something and they don't really enjoy it or get into it. Basically I just need
to LIGHTEN UP, but I'm finding it hard.

I truly believe in unschooling. I just read about all the cool stuff some
unschoolers are doing. Then I start comparing us, then I start feeling the
pressure, and on and on and on....

Blessings,
Jamye

Robyn Coburn

<<<She wants to tell me what to say and do and act and how to be and
logically
I know that it is her game and she is just wanting some control perhaps over
me as well as her play. But I have a hard time being told what to do and
then being yelled at if I don't do exactly what she thought I should even
though she didn't articulate it, you know?>>>

I know what you mean about the imagination play - especially when Jayn wants
me to the other person playing Barbie type games. Not only do I find it
pretty darn dull, but Jayn is all about telling me which voice to use and
stuff. I do it as much as I can stand.

On those occasions when she yells at me, having evidently gotten frustrated
over my lack of abilities, I tell her immediately, in a flat tone of voice
(I mean not angry - more matter-of-fact): "I don't like to be yelled at. If
you yell in my face like that I won't keep playing." Jayn always says she is
sorry she yelled, and repeats her request in a pleasant voice.

Anyone who has a better words to say to her in this situation, since it is
like a threat, I would be happy to hear them.

Robyn L. Coburn



---
Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free.
Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com).
Version: 6.0.707 / Virus Database: 463 - Release Date: 6/15/2004

christy_imnotred

--- In [email protected], Sherri-Lee Pressman <sherri-
-lee@s...> wrote:
>
>
> She wants to tell me what to say and do and act and how to be and
logically
> I know that it is her game and she is just wanting some control
perhaps over
> me as well as her play. But I have a hard time being told what to
do and
> then being yelled at if I don't do exactly what she thought I
should even
> though she didn't articulate it, you know?
>
>
>
> Now sure how to approach this... and do I really need to do this
kind of
> play to meet my obligations (I know some of you don't like this
word, but it
> doesn't bother me) to her?


You may want to read Playful Parenting by Lawrence Cohen. It
discusses why this type of play is so important for young kids and
why it is important that we go along with it. I don't enjoy it much
either, but I really make the effort now based on what I read in that
book.

Christy

[email protected]

In a message dated 6/26/2004 8:09:58 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
sherri--lee@... writes:

Not your classic depression symptoms, not eating or starving, sleeping
or not, or sad or weepy, but angry and feeling very violent and resentful
and miserable. It was horrible. When I remember some of the things I said I
could cry.



<<<<

My depression too. I'm nowhere NEAR suicidal----I think way too much of
myself for *that*! But I do feel homicidal---and downright dangerous!

~Kelly


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Jon and Rue Kream

>>Jayn is all about telling me which voice to use and
stuff.

**I don't particularly love that type of play myself, mostly because I have
a hard time getting really involved in it, but I have gotten better at it
over the years. We did find one thing that helped a LOT with the problem of
the kids wanting me to play a certain way. My sister went out and bought me
my own dolls :0). So now I can make them say what I want and do what I want
and the kids are fine with that. May be worth a shot. ~Rue

Robyn Coburn

**I don't particularly love that type of play myself, mostly because I have
a hard time getting really involved in it, but I have gotten better at it
over the years. We did find one thing that helped a LOT with the problem of
the kids wanting me to play a certain way. My sister went out and bought me
my own dolls :0). So now I can make them say what I want and do what I want
and the kids are fine with that. May be worth a shot. ~Rue

Oh that is very cute. Actually Jayn has all the dolls I really love, and one
thing I often do is either use one of her ballerina dolls (Disney
Princesses) that have stiff legs and will move like a puppet, or get
involved with brushing out their hair which often takes a long time from
being really tangled.

Robyn L. Coburn


---
Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free.
Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com).
Version: 6.0.707 / Virus Database: 463 - Release Date: 6/15/2004

[email protected]

In a message dated 6/24/2004 11:23:18 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
mamaaj2000@... writes:

I'm curious about what people's fears are/were about starting to
unschool. My top one is I'm afraid I don't have the energy to provide
enough activities, social life, opportunities, whatever for my kids.<<<<<


Ben and I were afraid we'd be arrested! <g> Thrown in jail for our child's
truancy!

Homeschooling laws in SC are *very* vague, and at first I was bending over
backwards to document everything. NObody needs *that* much information! <bwg>
Seeing the learning that was happening withOUT the "lessons" was eye-opening,
and I started to understand that he was indeed learning every day. And that
documenting wasn't the most important thing!


>>>>And if you have any extra energy, I'll give you my mailing address!<<<<

My 16 year old and I have always been "in sync", but my eight year old runs
me ragged. I'm pretty much a high energy kind of gal; but he goes non-stop
sometimes, and it's all I can do to keep up! Maybe I'm just old! <g>

If you want extra energy----go to Ren! I don't know where she finds it, but
she has plenty!

~Kelly







[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Joan Labbe & Salvatore Genovese

-----Original Message-----
From: Robyn Coburn [mailto:dezigna@...]
Sent: Saturday, June 26, 2004 9:57 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: RE: [unschoolingbasics] Fears?

"On those occasions when she yells at me, having evidently gotten frustrated
over my lack of abilities, I tell her immediately, in a flat tone of voice
(I mean not angry - more matter-of-fact): "I don't like to be yelled at. If
you yell in my face like that I won't keep playing." Jayn always says she is
sorry she yelled, and repeats her request in a pleasant voice.

Anyone who has a better words to say to her in this situation, since it is
like a threat, I would be happy to hear them.

Robyn L. Coburn"


Been there, done that. My words were "That yelling hurts my ears and makes
me not want to play this game any longer. Could you use your regular polite
voice please so I can keep playing with you?" This felt like a description
rather than a threat and my dd was happy to adjust.

When my dd making all the rules and directing all the play got to feel like
too much for me, I'd describe that and she'd usually agree to taking turns
picking the way we were going to play for a while.

Joan

mamaaj2000

--- In [email protected], "christy_imnotred"
<christy_imnotred@y...> wrote:
> You may want to read Playful Parenting by Lawrence Cohen. It
> discusses why this type of play is so important for young kids and
> why it is important that we go along with it. I don't enjoy it
much
> either, but I really make the effort now based on what I read in
that
> book.

The book is all that and more!! He talks about ways to maintain your
sanity and act out your own emotions. I was thinking about what he'd
say to Robyn when Jayn started yelling at her and then Mikey took
away the engine he'd just given me to play with--of course because I
wasn't putting th engine on the right track! So my engine got mad and
said "Mikey, you shouldn't take me away from Mommy! She's supposed to
be playing with me, not you! That's not fair, give me back!" And then
the engine got Mikey's engine to help her go through the engine wash
because she was scared of getting water in her eyes (a big fear of
Mikey's).

We all felt better, esp. *my* engine. ;-)

--aj

Sherri-Lee Pressman

Hi Robyn,

I will try that. I don't think your words sound like a threat although it
would be a fine line really. But if you are doing it in a flat tone of voice
without the threat inflection, then it might come off as a matter of fact.
No one likes being yelled at and if it was another child she was yelling at
the reaction would be much different.

Thanks for the encouragement and it is so good I am not the only one,

Sherri-Lee

-----Original Message-----
From: Robyn Coburn [mailto:dezigna@...]
Sent: Saturday, June 26, 2004 6:57 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: RE: [unschoolingbasics] Fears?

<<<She wants to tell me what to say and do and act and how to be and
logically
I know that it is her game and she is just wanting some control perhaps over
me as well as her play. But I have a hard time being told what to do and
then being yelled at if I don't do exactly what she thought I should even
though she didn't articulate it, you know?>>>

I know what you mean about the imagination play - especially when Jayn wants
me to the other person playing Barbie type games. Not only do I find it
pretty darn dull, but Jayn is all about telling me which voice to use and
stuff. I do it as much as I can stand.

On those occasions when she yells at me, having evidently gotten frustrated
over my lack of abilities, I tell her immediately, in a flat tone of voice
(I mean not angry - more matter-of-fact): "I don't like to be yelled at. If
you yell in my face like that I won't keep playing." Jayn always says she is
sorry she yelled, and repeats her request in a pleasant voice.

Anyone who has a better words to say to her in this situation, since it is
like a threat, I would be happy to hear them.

Robyn L. Coburn



---
Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free.
Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com).
Version: 6.0.707 / Virus Database: 463 - Release Date: 6/15/2004






Yahoo! Groups Links

Sherri-Lee Pressman

Hi Christy,



It is in my to be read pile..sigh. will get to it. Although I know
intellectually that it is important for her, just not sure if I have to
supply that when she has her dad.



Thanks for the suggestion,



Sherri-Lee



_____

From: christy_imnotred [mailto:christy_imnotred@...]
Sent: Saturday, June 26, 2004 7:02 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Re: Fears?



--- In [email protected], Sherri-Lee Pressman <sherri-
-lee@s...> wrote:
>
>
> She wants to tell me what to say and do and act and how to be and
logically
> I know that it is her game and she is just wanting some control
perhaps over
> me as well as her play. But I have a hard time being told what to
do and
> then being yelled at if I don't do exactly what she thought I
should even
> though she didn't articulate it, you know?
>
>
>
> Now sure how to approach this... and do I really need to do this
kind of
> play to meet my obligations (I know some of you don't like this
word, but it
> doesn't bother me) to her?


You may want to read Playful Parenting by Lawrence Cohen. It
discusses why this type of play is so important for young kids and
why it is important that we go along with it. I don't enjoy it much
either, but I really make the effort now based on what I read in that
book.

Christy






Yahoo! Groups Sponsor



ADVERTISEMENT

<http://us.ard.yahoo.com/SIG=1298sfvdu/M=298184.5022502.6152625.3001176/D=gr
oups/S=1705081972:HM/EXP=1088388137/A=2164339/R=0/SIG=11e2d64in/*http:/www.n
etflix.com/Default?mqso=60183348> click here



<http://us.adserver.yahoo.com/l?M=298184.5022502.6152625.3001176/D=groups/S=
:HM/A=2164339/rand=258499703>



_____

Yahoo! Groups Links

* To visit your group on the web, go to:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingbasics/

* To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
[email protected]
<mailto:[email protected]?subject=Unsubscribe>

* Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo!
<http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/> Terms of Service.



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

christy_imnotred

--- In [email protected], Sherri-Lee Pressman <sherri-
-lee@s...> wrote:
> Hi Christy,
>
>
>
> It is in my to be read pile..sigh. will get to it. Although I know
> intellectually that it is important for her, just not sure if I
have to
> supply that when she has her dad.
>
>
>
> Thanks for the suggestion,
>
>
>
> Sherri-Lee
>

It's great she has her dad to play with, but important to have you to
play with too. Play is how kids come to terms with what they are
feeling and when an adult is sharing that with them they come to feel
closer to the adult and trust them more. The more I play with my
son, the closer our relationship is. The book does a great job of
explaining all this. Especially after the baby comes, it will be
even more important that she gets time to play with you where you do
whatever she tells you.

Christy

Tina

Is there anyone willing to elaborate more on strewing? This has
always been a difficult concept for me to wrap my brain around. And,
after reading the latest strings of posts, I'm really interested in
getting to the "next level" on this one.

Up to this point my understanding of stewing is *leaving books and
other reading material that may be of interest in various locations
around the house*. After paying more attention, as I've always
suspected, it seems there is much more than this to it.

What does *strewing* mean to you? What do you strew around your
home? What wisdom can you share on this concept? What do you stew to
entice those that don't enjoy reading? Where do you get your ideas,
not topics, but WHAT you actually stew?

Thanks - Tina