cheryledstrom

WOW! I never expected all that disagreement about violent cartoons!
Every family, every child, is different, but I really thought that
watching too many "Wham, Thwack" cartoons pretty universally led to
more "wham, thwack" behavior. My kids do love Lord of the Rings and
play sword fight, I'm not completely suppressive of their warlike
instincts! In fact, they had made swords several times out of
cardboard that eventually fell apart, so for Christmas they got LotR
swords. I have three boys and my sister has two, grandma got all of
them a sword and they all "play fought".

However, in my opinion, play sword fighting (with cardboard or
plastic) lacks the element of danger that hand to hand combat
presents. In a way, the swords do the fighting, not the boys
themselves.

Also, my main point was that it's probably not the best idea for a
parent to instigate the "fight". The cartoon comment was only meant
as an aside!

i also want to respond to Rachel herself about her child's need for
extra physical contact. Although i have no direct experience with
this, my husband is a teacher of children with special needs, and
spent two years in an autism unit. (For those of you who are
saying, "wait, they unschool and he's a TEACHER?", yes. It may seem
odd, but there are more teachers than you think who know the system
is completely broken and choose to pull their own children out of it)

Anyway, i asked him about the "proprioceptive input". We discussed
possible options to play fighting, and we thought maybe learning deep
tissue massage might be helpful for you with your son. he also said
that wrapping a child tightly in a heavy blanket sometimes feels good
to them.

Again, I'm not walking in your shoes and I'm not trying to tell you
how to treat your own child, just trying to answer your call for help!

[email protected]

In a message dated 1/19/2004 1:36:13 PM Central Standard Time,
momonly@... writes:


> Also, my main point was that it's probably not the best idea for a
> parent to instigate the "fight". The cartoon comment was only meant
> as an aside!
>
>

Well, IMHO that is the great part of discussion lists, they go where they go.
Once something is laid on the table it is fair game, we lose control over
where it goes, LOL.

I have been on several lists where the original poster became upset over the
course of discussion their post took. I always hope that the author of the
original post realizes that not every comment is meant for them as I sometimes
get the impression that they begin to feel like that. Often by the time a
thread dies no one even remembers who started it and the many twists and turns
some threads take do not even resemble the original post.

Rambling,
Laura


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

In a message dated 1/19/2004 12:35:58 PM Mountain Standard Time,
momonly@... writes:
-=-I really thought that
watching too many "Wham, Thwack" cartoons pretty universally led to
more "wham, thwack" behavior. -=-

That's what "they" say.

They also say school is necessary, kids can't learn to read, that if you
don't prevent it, kids will do nothing all day except watch tv or play video games.

Turns out they're wrong!

It takes courage to just turn and go where others have said is "DANGER
DANGER" but unschooling seems to be one layer after another of discovering that the
warnings are put there to justify limiting and controlling children, and to
keep families conforming to telling kids bedtime is 8:00, no you can't watch
that, nobody your age can, etc.

-=-However, in my opinion, play sword fighting (with cardboard or
plastic) lacks the element of danger that hand to hand combat
presents. In a way, the swords do the fighting, not the boys
themselves. -=-

Swords kill, people don't kill?<g>

My kids have played with all manner of toy swords, and you can get hurt being
hit with any piece of hard plastic no matter what its shape. Pointy hard
plastic? You could put your eye out (or at least black it pretty well).

I had a kid watch me do calligraphy for a while one day and then snort as he
left, "The PEN does it." Yes, I needed a particular kind of nib, but I was
doing the writing with that pen, and people with weapons are using the weappons.

-=- It may seem
odd, but there are more teachers than you think who . . .-=-

Lots of us were or are teachers. We know.

This inspired me to check the date you joined the list. It has just been two
or three days.


Please read a while longer, maybe read in the archives, maybe read at
www.unschooling.com (the message boards there). With such a large list, moderators
sometimes don't catch all the too-new posters.

Sandra


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

In a message dated 1/19/2004 1:25:37 PM Mountain Standard Time,
BonKnit@... writes:
-=-I always hope that the author of the
original post realizes that not every comment is meant for them as I
sometimes
get the impression that they begin to feel like that. -=-

YES. And putting someone's name (like mine<g>) on a response isn't helpful,
because we're writing to the hundreds of people getting individual e-mails,
and the thousand+ reading it at the site or in digest, and those who will join
in a month and read the old posts.

So sometimes we end up being kind of direct and personal, but general and
philosophical is preferable to pointed and individual.

Sandra


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

arcarpenter2003

--- In [email protected], SandraDodd@a... wrote:
>
> They also say school is necessary, kids can't learn to read, that
if you
> don't prevent it, kids will do nothing all day except watch tv or
play video games.
>
> Turns out they're wrong!
>
> It takes courage to just turn and go where others have said
is "DANGER
> DANGER" but unschooling seems to be one layer after another of
discovering that the
> warnings are put there to justify limiting and controlling
children, and to
> keep families conforming to telling kids bedtime is 8:00, no you
can't watch
> that, nobody your age can, etc.

I needed this today, so thank you, Sandra. We are one of those
families that switched almost overnight (just over 2 months ago) --
from my 6-yr-old attending a "back to basics" school to unschooling,
from restricted TV, computer and video games to no restrictions, from
an 8:00 bedtime to "it's time to go to your room because *I'm*
tired," from insisting he try "just one bite" at dinner to letting
him eat when and what he wants. I love where we are, and I'm
completely sold on the whole thing -- but those outside DANGER
messages have been there an awfully long time. I have my moments
when I'm near tears because I'm just sure I've "ruined everything."
And then I breathe, and my husband says something sensible like "No
way in hell would I put him back in school." <g> Then I look at how
my son is jumping around, happy and carefree and watching TV, and
what great conversations we're having, and I keep sifting through my
own memories of not being respected and compare it to how we try to
respect my son.

This is better.

Peace,
Amy

Elizabeth Roberts

Paul asked me once just why I like this email group so much...and I said it's because I've finally found a bunch of women who wander as they talk from one subject to another just like I do! (He's forever asking me to just get to the point as quickly as I can)

MamaBeth

BonKnit@... wrote:
In a message dated 1/19/2004 1:36:13 PM Central Standard Time,
momonly@... writes:


> Also, my main point was that it's probably not the best idea for a
> parent to instigate the "fight". The cartoon comment was only meant
> as an aside!
>
>

Well, IMHO that is the great part of discussion lists, they go where they go.
Once something is laid on the table it is fair game, we lose control over
where it goes, LOL.

I have been on several lists where the original poster became upset over the
course of discussion their post took. I always hope that the author of the
original post realizes that not every comment is meant for them as I sometimes
get the impression that they begin to feel like that. Often by the time a
thread dies no one even remembers who started it and the many twists and turns
some threads take do not even resemble the original post.

Rambling,
Laura


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]



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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

In a message dated 1/19/2004 3:39:29 PM Central Standard Time,
SandraDodd@... writes:


> YES. And putting someone's name (like mine<g>) on a response isn't
> helpful,
> because we're writing to the hundreds of people getting individual e-mails,
> and the thousand+ reading it at the site or in digest, and those who will
> join
> in a month and read the old posts.
>

I realize I did that today but as I am staring at I have no idea how many
posts I can't figure our where it is to fix it. ACK!! Go away a few hours and see
what happens?
Laura


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

pam sorooshian

On Jan 19, 2004, at 11:56 AM, SandraDodd@... wrote:

> I had a kid watch me do calligraphy for a while one day and then snort
> as he
> left, "The PEN does it." Yes, I needed a particular kind of nib, but
> I was
> doing the writing with that pen, and people with weapons are using the
> weappons.
>

Different point - but it reminded me of my nephew watching me fix some
software problem on his computer - he watched intently for about 10
minutes and then I heard him in the other room telling his mom, "She
doesn't know how to fix it, she's just going to play around until
something happens to work."

--pam
National Home Education Network
<www.NHEN.org>
Serving the entire homeschooling community since 1999
through information, networking and public relations.