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I have just recently (last few months) started talking to my dh about
homeschooling our children. I really want to go to the conference now that everyone
here has been explaining about it so much! We talked about it last night. He
was wondering what the kids will do at the conference. I did explain that
it's not a conference like at work... but did suggest things like take the kids
to the pool to swim, play with other kids, etc. I would love for us to attend
as a family but am wondering if I could get more out of it by myself or just
with dh and have the kids play with grandma for the weekend. I do want my
husband to attend, the conference would give him a chance to meet other families
for whom this WORKS!

Although he is not sure about just how unschooling would work, I think he has
at least come around to the idea that NOT sending them to school is the way
to go. I give him examples from my previous life as a special ed teacher all
the time.

I have asked him to at least read a few books about unschooling since I don't
think I always explain it so well. He's thinking that the kids are still
young(3 1/2 & 1), why do we need to make this decision now? I'm
thinking...Kindergarten in ps would be just another year away. I want him to be on board to
this idea as much as I am because I'm sure it would be very hard for a family
to unschool if only one parent is "into" it.

As it's not too far to drive, I think we will go! Also...for those of you
who are making a vacation out of it...there are tons of things to do in that
area. For young kids, the Boston Children's Museum is great. As well as several
other museums in Boston and of course checking out Cape Cod.
Amanda


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Robyn Coburn

<<I have asked him to at least read a few books about unschooling since I
don't
think I always explain it so well. He's thinking that the kids are still
young(3 1/2 & 1), why do we need to make this decision now? I'm
thinking...Kindergarten in ps would be just another year away. I want him
to be on board to
this idea as much as I am because I'm sure it would be very hard for a
family
to unschool if only one parent is "into" it.>>

Two thoughts on this:

First: my dh is impossible about reading books (and he is one of the "gets
it" Dads) but I believe he came to it from several steps including - me
sometimes reading him a pertinent paragraph from Holt or other books; us
spending time talking about what was bad about our parents with us and what
would have been better (possibly the real key); me forwarding him a *few*
posts from this list, or the *occasional* pithy article/post from
sandradodd.com, unschooling.com or naturalchild.org. I tried highlighting
passages and book marking pages for him in the books but that is just not
him. He is far more likely to read anything if it is shining out of a
screen, or in a magazine of which he consumes many each month. I get Life
Learning delivered. If your dh likes reading books - hurrah!

Once when I tried to give him something to look at, he said grumpily, "Is
that another book for you to criticize me with?" I realized that my
"instructing him" attitude to unschooling was not helping anyone. Now I do
more by e-mail, and tell him I have sent him something funny or really
interesting *to me* that he might enjoy.

Secondly: I'm sure you have been reading the several threads on the
frustrations people have changing from one parenting system to another, and
letting go of restrictions. It is a whole lifestyle, not just the going to
school part. Every time one these threads comes up I am so glad we started
almost from the beginning of Jayn's (4) life with these ideas, that flowed
naturally from attachment parenting for us. She is sometimes wild, and has
done what might be termed "naughty" things with poured liquids - her
favorite playtoy is water - but she is so much fun, and has no fear of us in
her eyes. I urge him to go to the conference because hearing people speak is
so much easier for some kinds of learners (Multiple intelligences and all
that) than reading things. My dh was already (before Jayn was born) an
anti-spanker (as was I) and anti-shouter (which I had to learn to be, from
my own reading to find the many alternatives, and from him and his support).

Aw gee, I wish he was home, I'd go give him a big hug and kiss. Jayn is
still snoozing so I don't want to wake her yet. (50 emails to go!)

Robyn L. Coburn





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