driving around
Barbara Chase
I just re-read the "Magical Thinking and Spoiled Children" page on Sandra's
site (http://sandradodd.com/spoiled). I'd like to quote something Pam
Sorooshian wrote:
"We then went to three grocery stores, one right after another, because
Holly (who was maybe 4 or 5 at the time) was really wanting some plums and
the first couple of stores we went to didn't have any."
I remember when I first read this a few years ago I wished that I lived in
a town where I could do this sort of thing for my daughter. We live
rurally, and although we have two small markets and an organic food/deli
market the options are really limited. We only get plums during the
season, and even then not even the whole season.
Not long ago Nicole wanted navel oranges (she doesn't like valencias). Our
community didn't have any yet. We could have driven about 45 minutes to
one town (they have some large brand-name groceries), but she didn't want
to make the long drive. And honestly, I often don't want to make the long
drive. But we do get to that town every week, so I always put these
requests on a list. Still, she doesn't get the orange that she's in the
mood for.
Well, the other day we happened to stop at McDonald's and she discovered
that one of the toy options was a fairy. She adores fairies. We were in
the small town (only one McDs) and they didn't have any fairies. She was
heartbroken. But, it just so happened that we were driving to the really
large city and there were at least 5 McDs on the way. She was delighted!
We stopped at every one, and the last one had the fairy. It felt so good
to be able to make each stop for her, and to finally attain victory in just
one afternoon. But that night she took her doll somewhere with her and
lost it. We were staying over at my Mom's, so no problem -- we'd just go
back to that one McDs on the way home. Nope - they were now out of
fairies. We had stopped at every McDs on the way there, so I was beside
myself and Nicole was so angry with me for not trying. How could I explain
to her that I had tried! All of a sudden I remembered one more McDs that
we hadn't been to. She wanted to go in herself and ask. The manager went
into the back, rummaged around, and found one. I will never forget the
grin on Nicole's face (and the joy in her heart) when she came back
victorious again. She sincerely thanked me for helping her, for trying all
of the different places, and for remembering this one last one.
It's not something I get to do for her very often, since we live so far
away from places. But as she gets older she does see that this same thing
can happen when I make a list so we'll get it next time we're in town or go
online and buy it now (even though it won't show up for a week or so.) I'm
just so happy that we got to experience 'driving around' for real.
Mahalo,
Barbara
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
site (http://sandradodd.com/spoiled). I'd like to quote something Pam
Sorooshian wrote:
"We then went to three grocery stores, one right after another, because
Holly (who was maybe 4 or 5 at the time) was really wanting some plums and
the first couple of stores we went to didn't have any."
I remember when I first read this a few years ago I wished that I lived in
a town where I could do this sort of thing for my daughter. We live
rurally, and although we have two small markets and an organic food/deli
market the options are really limited. We only get plums during the
season, and even then not even the whole season.
Not long ago Nicole wanted navel oranges (she doesn't like valencias). Our
community didn't have any yet. We could have driven about 45 minutes to
one town (they have some large brand-name groceries), but she didn't want
to make the long drive. And honestly, I often don't want to make the long
drive. But we do get to that town every week, so I always put these
requests on a list. Still, she doesn't get the orange that she's in the
mood for.
Well, the other day we happened to stop at McDonald's and she discovered
that one of the toy options was a fairy. She adores fairies. We were in
the small town (only one McDs) and they didn't have any fairies. She was
heartbroken. But, it just so happened that we were driving to the really
large city and there were at least 5 McDs on the way. She was delighted!
We stopped at every one, and the last one had the fairy. It felt so good
to be able to make each stop for her, and to finally attain victory in just
one afternoon. But that night she took her doll somewhere with her and
lost it. We were staying over at my Mom's, so no problem -- we'd just go
back to that one McDs on the way home. Nope - they were now out of
fairies. We had stopped at every McDs on the way there, so I was beside
myself and Nicole was so angry with me for not trying. How could I explain
to her that I had tried! All of a sudden I remembered one more McDs that
we hadn't been to. She wanted to go in herself and ask. The manager went
into the back, rummaged around, and found one. I will never forget the
grin on Nicole's face (and the joy in her heart) when she came back
victorious again. She sincerely thanked me for helping her, for trying all
of the different places, and for remembering this one last one.
It's not something I get to do for her very often, since we live so far
away from places. But as she gets older she does see that this same thing
can happen when I make a list so we'll get it next time we're in town or go
online and buy it now (even though it won't show up for a week or so.) I'm
just so happy that we got to experience 'driving around' for real.
Mahalo,
Barbara
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 2/12/05 7:15:34 PM, barb@... writes:
<< She wanted to go in herself and ask. The manager went
into the back, rummaged around, and found one. I will never forget the
grin on Nicole's face (and the joy in her heart) when she came back
victorious again. >>
That is really sweet.
Holly got a rat yesterday. She had two and wanted a third one. I made a
couple of phone calls in advance, and then drove in the rain. I was determined
to be patient and even drive to the pet store way across town that we knew had
female fancy rats, but she found one at the second store and there was a very
nice young employee who knew lots about rats and had bred them, who talked to
us quite a while.
It made me feel good to just decide that the rest of my day could be spent
letting Holly take her time and learn about rats and choose one.
The two she has, she's had for a year. They're big and healthy.
The one she got yesterday is small and bony and passive. She said something
earlier today about it being the kind of rat that might not live, but that
nobody would have bought it to feed a snake because it was still and scrawny.
So she seems to have the calm idea that if it doesn't live that's acceptable,
and if it does that will be GREAT! She has pampered and bottle fed it, and
last night it slept in a separate little cage, on her bed, with a hot corn bag
near it.
Sometimes a willingness to drive around without the necessity to actually do
so can be cool too. "Yes, I will do this if it takes hours" might just take
twenty minutes, and everyone has that warm loving shared feeling.
I'm glad you found the fairy, Barbara.
Sandra
<< She wanted to go in herself and ask. The manager went
into the back, rummaged around, and found one. I will never forget the
grin on Nicole's face (and the joy in her heart) when she came back
victorious again. >>
That is really sweet.
Holly got a rat yesterday. She had two and wanted a third one. I made a
couple of phone calls in advance, and then drove in the rain. I was determined
to be patient and even drive to the pet store way across town that we knew had
female fancy rats, but she found one at the second store and there was a very
nice young employee who knew lots about rats and had bred them, who talked to
us quite a while.
It made me feel good to just decide that the rest of my day could be spent
letting Holly take her time and learn about rats and choose one.
The two she has, she's had for a year. They're big and healthy.
The one she got yesterday is small and bony and passive. She said something
earlier today about it being the kind of rat that might not live, but that
nobody would have bought it to feed a snake because it was still and scrawny.
So she seems to have the calm idea that if it doesn't live that's acceptable,
and if it does that will be GREAT! She has pampered and bottle fed it, and
last night it slept in a separate little cage, on her bed, with a hot corn bag
near it.
Sometimes a willingness to drive around without the necessity to actually do
so can be cool too. "Yes, I will do this if it takes hours" might just take
twenty minutes, and everyone has that warm loving shared feeling.
I'm glad you found the fairy, Barbara.
Sandra
Barbara Chase
So cool that Holly adopted the rat that really needed her the most. I
raised gerbals (they don't have those here in CA, so maybe this is just a
mid-west pet?) when I was a kid, and I really enjoyed taking care of the
mice and rats at school. I wouldn't mind having a rat as a pet, but maybe
after awhile... we just got a guinnea pig.
Nicole saw a pet store. She wanted to go visit the animals first, before
doing the other stuff. Afterward, she asked if we could always find pet
stores while we're out so she can visit the animals. It was just so great,
and I was thinking how wonderful it is that I can give her all the time in
the world to hang out and visit with the pets, and then we trade places and
she gives me all the time in the world to hang out and try to find more
sheets! ;-)
I probably will. It really represents such a great moment, tough but
victorious in the end.
Mahalo,
Barbara
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
raised gerbals (they don't have those here in CA, so maybe this is just a
mid-west pet?) when I was a kid, and I really enjoyed taking care of the
mice and rats at school. I wouldn't mind having a rat as a pet, but maybe
after awhile... we just got a guinnea pig.
>Sometimes a willingness to drive around without the necessity to actually doOh yes! Just the other day we were doing errands in the big city and
>so can be cool too. "Yes, I will do this if it takes hours" might just take
>twenty minutes, and everyone has that warm loving shared feeling.
Nicole saw a pet store. She wanted to go visit the animals first, before
doing the other stuff. Afterward, she asked if we could always find pet
stores while we're out so she can visit the animals. It was just so great,
and I was thinking how wonderful it is that I can give her all the time in
the world to hang out and visit with the pets, and then we trade places and
she gives me all the time in the world to hang out and try to find more
sheets! ;-)
>I'm glad you found the fairy, Barbara.Yeah, me too. If Nicole doesn't end up wanting to keep it over the years,
I probably will. It really represents such a great moment, tough but
victorious in the end.
Mahalo,
Barbara
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Robyn Coburn
<<<<< It felt so good
to be able to make each stop for her, and to finally attain victory in just
one afternoon. But that night she took her doll somewhere with her and
lost it. We were staying over at my Mom's, so no problem -- we'd just go
back to that one McDs on the way home. Nope - they were now out of
fairies. We had stopped at every McDs on the way there, so I was beside
myself and Nicole was so angry with me for not trying. How could I explain
to her that I had tried! All of a sudden I remembered one more McDs that
we hadn't been to. She wanted to go in herself and ask. The manager went
into the back, rummaged around, and found one. I will never forget the
grin on Nicole's face (and the joy in her heart) when she came back
victorious again. She sincerely thanked me for helping her, for trying all
of the different places, and for remembering this one last one.>>>>>
We have done this exact type of thing more times than I can recall,
including whenever we are on vacation. We have gone on "family quests" for
some particular toy, including driving 25 miles to the only toy store that
had a particular toy after phoning all over. We have driven into the night
to look for a lost toy that we may have dropped on the sidewalk. At the last
conference we searched Salem, unsuccessfully, for the right kind of witch
doll - which gave us a terrific overview of Salem. It is always in the
spirit of adventure, and I think Jayn appreciates the fun of the search. And
the joy when the desired object is found!
Robyn L. Coburn
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to be able to make each stop for her, and to finally attain victory in just
one afternoon. But that night she took her doll somewhere with her and
lost it. We were staying over at my Mom's, so no problem -- we'd just go
back to that one McDs on the way home. Nope - they were now out of
fairies. We had stopped at every McDs on the way there, so I was beside
myself and Nicole was so angry with me for not trying. How could I explain
to her that I had tried! All of a sudden I remembered one more McDs that
we hadn't been to. She wanted to go in herself and ask. The manager went
into the back, rummaged around, and found one. I will never forget the
grin on Nicole's face (and the joy in her heart) when she came back
victorious again. She sincerely thanked me for helping her, for trying all
of the different places, and for remembering this one last one.>>>>>
We have done this exact type of thing more times than I can recall,
including whenever we are on vacation. We have gone on "family quests" for
some particular toy, including driving 25 miles to the only toy store that
had a particular toy after phoning all over. We have driven into the night
to look for a lost toy that we may have dropped on the sidewalk. At the last
conference we searched Salem, unsuccessfully, for the right kind of witch
doll - which gave us a terrific overview of Salem. It is always in the
spirit of adventure, and I think Jayn appreciates the fun of the search. And
the joy when the desired object is found!
Robyn L. Coburn
--
No virus found in this outgoing message.
Checked by AVG Anti-Virus.
Version: 7.0.300 / Virus Database: 265.8.7 - Release Date: 2/10/2005
[email protected]
In a message dated 2/12/2005 11:20:17 PM Central Standard Time,
barb@... writes:
Oh yes! Just the other day we were doing errands in the big city and
Nicole saw a pet store. She wanted to go visit the animals first, before
doing the other stuff. Afterward, she asked if we could always find pet
stores while we're out so she can visit the animals. It was just so great,
and I was thinking how wonderful it is that I can give her all the time in
the world to hang out and visit with the pets, and then we trade places and
she gives me all the time in the world to hang out and try to find more
sheets! ;-)
~~~
We visited a pet store in Wilkes-Barre, PA on our way back from the Live and
Learn Conference. It was pouring rain from the hurricanes and we were kind
of stuck in W-B, and there was a pet store on the way to the hotel. We
impulsively just pulled into it. It was a nice respite from being on the road,
and we had missed our pets for 3 weeks.
It was such a good idea, we hit two more between there and Arkansas!
Karen
www.thanksmom.blogspot.com
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
barb@... writes:
Oh yes! Just the other day we were doing errands in the big city and
Nicole saw a pet store. She wanted to go visit the animals first, before
doing the other stuff. Afterward, she asked if we could always find pet
stores while we're out so she can visit the animals. It was just so great,
and I was thinking how wonderful it is that I can give her all the time in
the world to hang out and visit with the pets, and then we trade places and
she gives me all the time in the world to hang out and try to find more
sheets! ;-)
~~~
We visited a pet store in Wilkes-Barre, PA on our way back from the Live and
Learn Conference. It was pouring rain from the hurricanes and we were kind
of stuck in W-B, and there was a pet store on the way to the hotel. We
impulsively just pulled into it. It was a nice respite from being on the road,
and we had missed our pets for 3 weeks.
It was such a good idea, we hit two more between there and Arkansas!
Karen
www.thanksmom.blogspot.com
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]