FW: [unschoolingbasics] Re: No passions/changing passions
carenkh
Jealous why?
Look at your kids - are they happy doing what they're doing? If so, it's enough. Keep strewing, but don't do that with the idea that "THIS is what's going to get them excited!" - do it because you know them, and you know what their interests are, and you want to share something interesting.
My oldest is really, really content at home, connecting with friends online. When he goes out anywhere, as soon as we're done doing what we said we were doing, he's immediately ready to come home. It's who he is, right now, and I don't have a need for him to have more friends or be more involved in the community, or want to be out more. He's happy, and excited by what he does do at home.
Have you read about different personality types - introvert/extrovert? Introverts recharge their energy by being alone, extroverts by being around people. Introverts feel drained after being around groups of people, or sometimes in loud places. They can do it, and most *enjoy* parties, being around other people, but they're ultimately drained by it, and need alone time to recharge. The extrovert is certainly more "rewarded" in our society, and in school, and one of the real joys of unschooling is the ability to celebrate our kids for who they are, without the desire for them to be anyone other than that.
This could be a really helpful time for you to look within, and ask yourSELF why you have these fears around your kids and what brings them enjoyment.
peace,
Caren
Look at your kids - are they happy doing what they're doing? If so, it's enough. Keep strewing, but don't do that with the idea that "THIS is what's going to get them excited!" - do it because you know them, and you know what their interests are, and you want to share something interesting.
My oldest is really, really content at home, connecting with friends online. When he goes out anywhere, as soon as we're done doing what we said we were doing, he's immediately ready to come home. It's who he is, right now, and I don't have a need for him to have more friends or be more involved in the community, or want to be out more. He's happy, and excited by what he does do at home.
Have you read about different personality types - introvert/extrovert? Introverts recharge their energy by being alone, extroverts by being around people. Introverts feel drained after being around groups of people, or sometimes in loud places. They can do it, and most *enjoy* parties, being around other people, but they're ultimately drained by it, and need alone time to recharge. The extrovert is certainly more "rewarded" in our society, and in school, and one of the real joys of unschooling is the ability to celebrate our kids for who they are, without the desire for them to be anyone other than that.
This could be a really helpful time for you to look within, and ask yourSELF why you have these fears around your kids and what brings them enjoyment.
peace,
Caren
Heather
Rod Thomas wrote:
what this kid is doing- why can't you take the opportunities I am
offering you! Not my intention- just offered as an example as how one
can expand on an interest. Some kids have paths that are easier for
adults to understand, though. This is one that many people can get. He
is doing a lot less of this at the moment, and seems to be going in
another direction. This summer he has focused on skateboarding and
mountain biking just about every day - and getting a job as a cashier.
All this involves a ton of learning, too The type of learning he does
fits his personality- very active and adventurous. Other people are more
comfortable learning at home. Like myself, for instance.
There is a lot of room for all types of poeple - some are more
impressive and outward, and that is cool. Some are quieter and content
to be at home - and that is really great, too. I am a "homebody" myself
so can relate. It has been and still is a journey for me to accept my
two very different kids and their different ways of learning and
approaches to life.
I think the real question is here- are your kids content with their
lives? If they are, then all is well. You could try exploring some
things you are interested in yourself if you need some excitement!!
Heather (in NY)
>Yes, sorry. I have had that reaction before - even parents saying: look
>
> THAT's the kind of expansion im talking about! Im sure it really gets him
> out there and involved with all sorts of things and people.
>
> But now im jealous and this just made me feel worse.
>
what this kid is doing- why can't you take the opportunities I am
offering you! Not my intention- just offered as an example as how one
can expand on an interest. Some kids have paths that are easier for
adults to understand, though. This is one that many people can get. He
is doing a lot less of this at the moment, and seems to be going in
another direction. This summer he has focused on skateboarding and
mountain biking just about every day - and getting a job as a cashier.
All this involves a ton of learning, too The type of learning he does
fits his personality- very active and adventurous. Other people are more
comfortable learning at home. Like myself, for instance.
There is a lot of room for all types of poeple - some are more
impressive and outward, and that is cool. Some are quieter and content
to be at home - and that is really great, too. I am a "homebody" myself
so can relate. It has been and still is a journey for me to accept my
two very different kids and their different ways of learning and
approaches to life.
I think the real question is here- are your kids content with their
lives? If they are, then all is well. You could try exploring some
things you are interested in yourself if you need some excitement!!
Heather (in NY)
Rod Thomas
that was probably confusing, here is resend to clarify posts and reply
-----Original Message-----
From: [email protected]
[mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of Rod Thomas
Sent: Monday, August 17, 2009 11:31 AM
To: [email protected]
Subject: RE: [unschoolingbasics] Re: No passions/changing passions
THAT's the kind of expansion im talking about! Im sure it really gets him
out there and involved with all sorts of things and people.
But now im jealous and this just made me feel worse.
<<<<My son's interest in listening to music expanded to such things as going
to local concerts, playing the electric bass, then trying the upright
bass at a music camp, which led to lessons when he requested them, to
playing with various groups such as the high school jazz band, high
school pit orchestras for musicals, a youth orchestra, several different
youth organized bands, attending scale classes at a local college,
apprenticing with a luthier, apprenticing with a sound technician,
recording music on his own, teaching electric bass, etc. Just to give
you an idea - not that your son's interest in music would lead to any of
that.
Heather (in NY)>>>>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
-----Original Message-----
From: [email protected]
[mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of Rod Thomas
Sent: Monday, August 17, 2009 11:31 AM
To: [email protected]
Subject: RE: [unschoolingbasics] Re: No passions/changing passions
THAT's the kind of expansion im talking about! Im sure it really gets him
out there and involved with all sorts of things and people.
But now im jealous and this just made me feel worse.
<<<<My son's interest in listening to music expanded to such things as going
to local concerts, playing the electric bass, then trying the upright
bass at a music camp, which led to lessons when he requested them, to
playing with various groups such as the high school jazz band, high
school pit orchestras for musicals, a youth orchestra, several different
youth organized bands, attending scale classes at a local college,
apprenticing with a luthier, apprenticing with a sound technician,
recording music on his own, teaching electric bass, etc. Just to give
you an idea - not that your son's interest in music would lead to any of
that.
Heather (in NY)>>>>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Rod Thomas
thanks for posting. I appreciate this great advice.
I do go off on my own a lot and have many interests and hobbies.
My kids seem happy at home.
kathy
We are headed off this weekend to the west coast (FL) to go on a scalloping
adventure!
-----Original Message-----
From: [email protected]
[mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of Heather
Sent: Monday, August 17, 2009 11:07 AM
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: FW: [unschoolingbasics] Re: No passions/changing passions
Rod Thomas wrote:
what this kid is doing- why can't you take the opportunities I am
offering you! Not my intention- just offered as an example as how one
can expand on an interest. Some kids have paths that are easier for
adults to understand, though. This is one that many people can get. He
is doing a lot less of this at the moment, and seems to be going in
another direction. This summer he has focused on skateboarding and
mountain biking just about every day - and getting a job as a cashier.
All this involves a ton of learning, too The type of learning he does
fits his personality- very active and adventurous. Other people are more
comfortable learning at home. Like myself, for instance.
There is a lot of room for all types of poeple - some are more
impressive and outward, and that is cool. Some are quieter and content
to be at home - and that is really great, too. I am a "homebody" myself
so can relate. It has been and still is a journey for me to accept my
two very different kids and their different ways of learning and
approaches to life.
I think the real question is here- are your kids content with their
lives? If they are, then all is well. You could try exploring some
things you are interested in yourself if you need some excitement!!
Heather (in NY)
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
I do go off on my own a lot and have many interests and hobbies.
My kids seem happy at home.
kathy
We are headed off this weekend to the west coast (FL) to go on a scalloping
adventure!
-----Original Message-----
From: [email protected]
[mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of Heather
Sent: Monday, August 17, 2009 11:07 AM
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: FW: [unschoolingbasics] Re: No passions/changing passions
Rod Thomas wrote:
>Yes, sorry. I have had that reaction before - even parents saying: look
>
> THAT's the kind of expansion im talking about! Im sure it really gets him
> out there and involved with all sorts of things and people.
>
> But now im jealous and this just made me feel worse.
>
what this kid is doing- why can't you take the opportunities I am
offering you! Not my intention- just offered as an example as how one
can expand on an interest. Some kids have paths that are easier for
adults to understand, though. This is one that many people can get. He
is doing a lot less of this at the moment, and seems to be going in
another direction. This summer he has focused on skateboarding and
mountain biking just about every day - and getting a job as a cashier.
All this involves a ton of learning, too The type of learning he does
fits his personality- very active and adventurous. Other people are more
comfortable learning at home. Like myself, for instance.
There is a lot of room for all types of poeple - some are more
impressive and outward, and that is cool. Some are quieter and content
to be at home - and that is really great, too. I am a "homebody" myself
so can relate. It has been and still is a journey for me to accept my
two very different kids and their different ways of learning and
approaches to life.
I think the real question is here- are your kids content with their
lives? If they are, then all is well. You could try exploring some
things you are interested in yourself if you need some excitement!!
Heather (in NY)
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]