Dory

Hi y'all. I'm new here so I thought I would introduce my family. I'm
Dory, wife to Kevin and mom to amazing Carson (7). We started hs in
September, but are now looking more toward an unschooling concept as we
are using RDI as our curriculum. This is a big leap of faith for me,
as I am very structured and task-oriented. I have a loooooooooong way
to go and a lot to learn. But I feel I'm up for it. Hope you are all
enjoying your day. Thanks in advance for your support! dory

[email protected]

Hi Dory,

Welcome to the group. This is a great group. If you don't mind me asking, What does RDI mean?

Oneida

Dory <carzmom2000@...> wrote:
Hi y'all. I'm new here so I thought I would introduce my family. I'm
Dory, wife to Kevin and mom to amazing Carson (7). We started hs in
September, but are now looking more toward an unschooling concept as we
are using RDI as our curriculum. This is a big leap of faith for me,
as I am very structured and task-oriented. I have a loooooooooong way
to go and a lot to learn. But I feel I'm up for it. Hope you are all
enjoying your day. Thanks in advance for your support! dory






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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Sarah Wilson

>


Hi All

I am another Newbie so thought I would add my story to the pot.

DH and & are parents to 2 DD's, H is 11 and M is 9.

We have always moved home a lot, mainly due to DH's work, but I think we
also have itchy feet as people to - maybe thats why DH's job suits us.
Most of his collegues chose to leave their families settled in one place
and travel to the different work locations, but we have always 'gone
with the job' and stayed together, seeing being together as more
imprtant than being in the same house.

We have always had what friends and family consider an unusual approach
to parenting, in that we have few rules and let the girls pretty much
decide what they eat, when they sleep etc. and have never been one of
those families who couldnt do stuff coz it would 'mess up the childrens
routine', and also we have never not been able to take them somewhere
because they wouldnt behave, or cope with it as many of our extended
family and friends seem to have problems with.

The girls did both go to school for a few years, but we never saw it
particularly as an enviroment for learning - I think we used it more as
a way to settle into a new neighbourhood, to help the girls find friends
quickly when we moved to a new area. We always saw the 'unoffical'
learning they did almost 'by accident' in living our lives as far more
important, and certainly their teachers (and they had lots) all seemed
to find they were more knowledgable and adaptable than the 'regular' kids.

But then we found 'homeschooling' and the associated groups that exist -
which seemed to fit the brief of frinding friends much better for the
girls than school ever had. Here they could meet with other chldren, not
restricted by age or postcode as school is, and make friends with people
they 'liked' rather than who had been born the same year as them.

So we took the decision to leave school behind and venture off on our
own. We looked at 'schol at home' and imediatly ruled it out as not for
us, and then looked at 'home schooling' which still didnt really sit
right with us. It wasnt until we came across the word, and philosophy of
'unschooling' that we finally found 'where we belonged'.

So here we are - unschooling away. DH's latest move has brought us to
Barcelona, Spain, which has brought challenges of its own, probably the
main one being the language as none of us speak Spainsh, but the lovely
weather and wealth of new things to see is more than making up for
that.I hope you don't mind us as an English family in Spain joining what
seems to be a predominatly American list, and hope to get to know more
about you all, and the wonderful journey that is unschooling over the
next few months

Thanks for reading this far
Sarah

Michelle Turnbow

welcome dory! i'm new too. i am michelle. mom to ashton age 4. what is rdi?

Dory <carzmom2000@...> wrote: Hi y'all. I'm new here so I thought I would introduce my family. I'm
Dory, wife to Kevin and mom to amazing Carson (7). We started hs in
September, but are now looking more toward an unschooling concept as we
are using RDI as our curriculum. This is a big leap of faith for me,
as I am very structured and task-oriented. I have a loooooooooong way
to go and a lot to learn. But I feel I'm up for it. Hope you are all
enjoying your day. Thanks in advance for your support! dory






[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Dory

--- Hi. RDI stands for Relationship Development Intervention. It's
a type of therapy used for kids on the autism spectrum. Our son has
difficulty with social issues and we are focusing on improving this.
dory


In [email protected], "scofield62001@..."
<scofield62001@...> wrote:
>
> Hi Dory,
>
> Welcome to the group. This is a great group. If you
don't mind me asking, What does RDI mean?
>
> Oneida
>
> Dory <carzmom2000@...> wrote:
> Hi y'all. I'm new here so I thought I would introduce my
family. I'm
> Dory, wife to Kevin and mom to amazing Carson (7). We started hs in
> September, but are now looking more toward an unschooling concept
as we
> are using RDI as our curriculum. This is a big leap of faith for
me,
> as I am very structured and task-oriented. I have a loooooooooong
way
> to go and a lot to learn. But I feel I'm up for it. Hope you are
all
> enjoying your day. Thanks in advance for your support! dory
>
>
>
>
>
>
> ---------------------------------
> Looking for last minute shopping deals? Find them fast with Yahoo!
Search.
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>

[email protected]

Hi Dory,

Thank you for letting me know what RDI stands for. We are raising our nephew age 18 who has Asperger syndrome, I will look into it to see if maybe that is something that will help him out.

Best wishes in all you do,
Oneida
Wife to John,
Mom to
DS 25 married with a family of his own
DS 18 Lives on his own
DD 11
DS 6
Raising our nephew 18 with Asperger Syndrome


Dory <carzmom2000@...> wrote:
--- Hi. RDI stands for Relationship Development Intervention. It's
a type of therapy used for kids on the autism spectrum. Our son has
difficulty with social issues and we are focusing on improving this.
dory







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Melissa

Hi and welcome
I have several kids with whom I practiced floortime, and we've looked into RDI, just can't
get past the cost ;-)

We kind of weaned back from the very structured lifestyle that we had. My kids by nature
function well with structure (everyone has a different level of need with structure/routine,
what have you. Unschooling to me means that the structure is not arbitrary in regards to
your child), so it has been a very fine balance as we approached radical unschooling. We
don't have a curriculum, but at first we did keep a written set of 'goals' that our most
severely affected child should reach. As time passes, I've been able to give up a lot of the
goal-orientation and structure, realizing that much of it was *me* and not her. Part of it
was becoming more able to seek my intuition in her needs, and being able to fulfill them
outside of a planned interaction.

Anyway, welcome to the group, I need to go and put up lights, we're weeks behind
because of this dang ice storm.
Melissa
--- In [email protected], "Dory" <carzmom2000@...> wrote:
>
> Hi y'all. I'm new here so I thought I would introduce my family. I'm
> Dory, wife to Kevin and mom to amazing Carson (7). We started hs in
> September, but are now looking more toward an unschooling concept as we
> are using RDI as our curriculum. This is a big leap of faith for me,
> as I am very structured and task-oriented. I have a loooooooooong way
> to go and a lot to learn. But I feel I'm up for it. Hope you are all
> enjoying your day. Thanks in advance for your support! dory
>

Mirika Sumers

Hello everyone,

I've got a four-year-old son and a two-year-old daughter. I think we've
been doing unschooling without really knowing what to call it since they
were born. Neither of the kids has ever been in preschool or commercial
childcare. When I had to go back to work they went to stay with my best
friend. We have done some Kindermusic (just because they think it's fun)
and my son takes Taekwondo, because he loves it, but that's about the most
structured we get. We read alot. As I suspect most kids do, they like to
memorize the words and say them with me. Sometimes we lay in our bed and
tell each other our memorized stories in dark. We've got easels and art
supplies, blocks, dolls, dinosaurs, games, you name it, scattered around the
house. We try to watch them to see what has attracted their interest in any
given moment and help them get the most out of it, which sometimes means
just watching and sometimes means showing them how to take something one
step further. Anyway, we started looking into school recently and then
somehow I stumbled across this concept on the net so here I am trying to
find my way though. We had a natural birth in a hospital for my son
(because I was too nervous to do unattended and too broke to have a midwife)
and a home waterbirth with my daughter. I tell everyone I know if you can
get in water after transition, do it. It was such a peaceful, empowering,
powerful few (4 total!) hours. Every mother and child deserve it. We still
have both kids in bed with us and my daughter still likes to ride in her
Ergo when we go to the zoo or just when I'm doing housework. She likes to
be given a dusting cloth and usually one of her little arms is stuck over my
shoulder dusting "by mommy's head" when we clean the bookcases. She also
likes to use oil on the cabinets while I'm at the sink doing dishes. Takes
4 times as long since we have to stop at every cabinet so she can "shine it
up" but we have a great time plus I get a GREAT workout doing all that
squatting with her on my back. :) Ahh, I hear her now. Gotta run! Happy
to be here!

Mirika



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

lisamullaney924

-HI Dory, I'm just now thinking about HS, and I like the unschooling idea also. I just hope
I can keep it together. Lisa
-- In [email protected], "Dory" <carzmom2000@...> wrote:
>
> Hi y'all. I'm new here so I thought I would introduce my family. I'm
> Dory, wife to Kevin and mom to amazing Carson (7). We started hs in
> September, but are now looking more toward an unschooling concept as we
> are using RDI as our curriculum. This is a big leap of faith for me,
> as I am very structured and task-oriented. I have a loooooooooong way
> to go and a lot to learn. But I feel I'm up for it. Hope you are all
> enjoying your day. Thanks in advance for your support! dory
>

Dory

--- I'll be happy to help you in any way I can. Feel free to email
me offline. BW. dory


In [email protected], "scofield62001@..."
<scofield62001@...> wrote:
>
> Hi Dory,
>
> Thank you for letting me know what RDI stands for. We
are raising our nephew age 18 who has Asperger syndrome, I will look
into it to see if maybe that is something that will help him out.
>
> Best wishes in all you do,
> Oneida
> Wife to John,
> Mom to
> DS 25 married with a family of his own
> DS 18 Lives on his own
> DD 11
> DS 6
> Raising our nephew 18 with Asperger Syndrome
>
>
> Dory <carzmom2000@...> wrote:
> --- Hi. RDI stands for Relationship Development
Intervention. It's
> a type of therapy used for kids on the autism spectrum. Our son has
> difficulty with social issues and we are focusing on improving
this.
> dory
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> Recent Activity
>
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Nicole Willoughby

Hi Mirika,

welcome! and out of curiosity are you from Memphis by any chance?

Nicole


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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Mirika Sumers

Thanks! And yes, I am.


-----Original Message-----
From: [email protected]
[mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of Nicole Willoughby
Sent: Sunday, December 16, 2007 7:57 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] another newbie :)



Hi Mirika,

welcome! and out of curiosity are you from Memphis by any chance?

Nicole

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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

Hi Dory,

Thank you for the offer of help.

Oneida

Dory <carzmom2000@...> wrote:
--- I'll be happy to help you in any way I can. Feel free to email
me offline. BW. dory







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b3emily

Hi everyone.
I'm new here. I'm a mother of a 4 year old, getting ready to home
school.I live in upstate NY. In my research I came across unschooling
and find it quite intriguing and wonderful. But I do have ton of
questions, so I figured I'll find a group who's collective brains I
can pick. So here I am.
Sarka

k

Pick away. I like that. If you like to read -- a great start is these two
links:

http://sandradodd.com/unschooling <http://sandradodd.com>
http://joyfullyrejoycing.com/


On 8/19/08, b3emily <b3emily@...> wrote:
>
> Hi everyone.
> I'm new here. I'm a mother of a 4 year old, getting ready to home
> school.I live in upstate NY. In my research I came across unschooling
> and find it quite intriguing and wonderful. But I do have ton of
> questions, so I figured I'll find a group who's collective brains I
> can pick. So here I am.
> Sarka
>
>
>


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

miguelkll

Hello!

I have just joined because I am looking for information. My son is 15 and has been in public school in special ed up until now. He has schizoaffective disorder and school has been a nightmare. I never really considered homeschooling because I am a single working parent and I thought I could not handle it with his special needs, but school has been terrible. Most days he just sleeps at school and isn't learning anything. My son's doctor has actually encouraged me to look into other options as school is actually making his symptoms worse. I started to think that maybe I could homeschool him staring next school year. So I started reading and researching and unschooling sounds like it could be the answer for us.

Would love any information.

Thanks,

Jenn


diana jenner

As you're in the research phase, I recommend you start with Sandra's
Encyclopaedic page:
www.sandradodd.com/unschooling
or Joyce's collection
www.joyfullyrejoycing.com

Lots and lots of information to start your quest :)
~diana :)
xoxoxoxo
hannahbearski.wordpress.com
hannahsashes.blogspot.com


On Thu, Apr 22, 2010 at 2:04 PM, miguelkll <jenn.kendrick@...> wrote:

>
>
> Hello!
>
> I have just joined because I am looking for information. My son is 15 and
> has been in public school in special ed up until now. He has schizoaffective
> disorder and school has been a nightmare. I never really considered
> homeschooling because I am a single working parent and I thought I could not
> handle it with his special needs, but school has been terrible. Most days he
> just sleeps at school and isn't learning anything. My son's doctor has
> actually encouraged me to look into other options as school is actually
> making his symptoms worse. I started to think that maybe I could homeschool
> him staring next school year. So I started reading and researching and
> unschooling sounds like it could be the answer for us.
>
> Would love any information.
>
> Thanks,
>
> Jenn
>
>
>


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Jenn Kendrick

Thank You! I have been reading about it for a while. I've been thinking
about other options for a while now. School has never really worked for my
son. He is mostly nonverbal so he is bullied because he is different and
the school seems to not be able to do anything about it. All they do in his
class is watch movies, like The Exorcist or he sleeps. He was put off the
school bus in a strange neighborhood because another student was picking on
him and he got upset. No one even called me. I found out when my younger son
got home and called me. I had to drive around for an hour before I found
him. I started driving him to and from school after that. Thank goodness I
have an understanding employer. The last straw came two weeks when a kid
started taking my sons's lunch. The teacher told my son he should just beat
the other kid up and the principals idea of a resolution is to send my son
home early everyday before lunch. My child who already has enough challenges
became more and more depressed until last week he was actually suicidal. We
took him in for an emergency appointment with his psychiatrist and she told
me that she really thought we needed to find an alternative to school.

I had researched more traditional homeschooling, but my son was really not
excited about the idea and I felt uncertain that I'd be able to do it as a
single mom who has to work full time.Then I happened on unschooling.
Actually my sister homeschools her kids and I had asked her some questions
about the laws in our state and she mentioned that some parents called
themselves unschoolers which she though sounded crazy, lol.
I started looking into it right away but at first dismissed it because I
didn't understand it at first and thought it wasn't legal in my state
anyway. With the most recent developments with my son's depression, I knew
we had to do something so I did more checking and found that I CAN unschool
in my state. I talked to my son and he was actually excited about the idea.
That in itself was proof that we were headed in the right direction. So I am
still researching but I have also decided that we are going to do this. I am
planning to have him finish this year, which is only 4 more weeks and then
withdraw him for next year. I'll have the summer to prepare and while I
understand I may not be able to learn it ALL in that amount of time, I am
still planning to go ahead. I've been reading a lot on my own but it's
really helpful to get suggestions from experienced unschoolers.

Jenn

On Sat, Apr 24, 2010 at 4:21 PM, diana jenner <hahamommy@...> wrote:

> As you're in the research phase, I recommend you start with Sandra's
> Encyclopaedic page:
> www.sandradodd.com/unschooling
> or Joyce's collection
> www.joyfullyrejoycing.com
>
> Lots and lots of information to start your quest :)
> ~diana :)
> xoxoxoxo
> hannahbearski.wordpress.com
> hannahsashes.blogspot.com
>
>
>


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Deb Lewis

*** I've been reading a lot on my own but it's
really helpful to get suggestions from experienced unschoolers.***

Do you have specific questions, Jenn? What suggestions are you looking for?

Here's something to read if you haven't already seen it: http://sandradodd.com/beginning

Deb Lewis



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Miguelkll

Sorry, I was referring to the reading suggestions that were sent to me in the post I was replying to. I wasn't clear.
 
Is anyone here doing this with a special needs child? Any recomended reading on that topic?
 
Jenn

plaidpanties666

--- In [email protected], Miguelkll <miguelkll@...> wrote:
> Is anyone here doing this with a special needs child? Any recomended reading on that topic?
*************

More than it will seem at first - many unschooling parents don't refer to "special needs" as such, unless something really specific and relevant comes up, not out of embarrassment but because the exact same principles apply to unschooling with atypical kids as typical - everything you read about radical unschooling is applicable, although the specific details may play out differently in specific situations. "Special needs kids" are still human, after all, and what makes unschooling work is human nature itself.

Its more helpful to ask about specific concerns. For instance, you said he's "mostly nonverbal" - is that one of the things you are concerned about? My dd was "mostly nonverbal" for years, but maybe in a different way than your son. She also was never in school so I had the luxury of learning to communicate with her without using very many words. Is that the sort of thing you had in mind?

With kids who have been in school as long as your son, and haven't had a great time there (to put it mildly) the first and most important step is to spend loooooots of time decompressing. He needs time to heal, emotionally and psychologically, from his schooling. So from your perspective, the first, most important things to read are about deschooling, and from there reading about what learning really looks like.

All that being said, here's a page with links to essays on unschooling atypical kids:

http://sandradodd.com/specialunschooling

---Meredith

Lyla Wolfenstein

also - ren allen's article:

http://radicalunschooling.blogspot.com/2009/10/unerzogen-article.html


----- Original Message -----
From: plaidpanties666
To: [email protected]
Sent: Sunday, April 25, 2010 3:20 PM
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Re: Another Newbie



--- In [email protected], Miguelkll <miguelkll@...> wrote:
> Is anyone here doing this with a special needs child? Any recomended reading on that topic?
*************

More than it will seem at first - many unschooling parents don't refer to "special needs" as such, unless something really specific and relevant comes up, not out of embarrassment but because the exact same principles apply to unschooling with atypical kids as typical - everything you read about radical unschooling is applicable, although the specific details may play out differently in specific situations. "Special needs kids" are still human, after all, and what makes unschooling work is human nature itself.

Its more helpful to ask about specific concerns. For instance, you said he's "mostly nonverbal" - is that one of the things you are concerned about? My dd was "mostly nonverbal" for years, but maybe in a different way than your son. She also was never in school so I had the luxury of learning to communicate with her without using very many words. Is that the sort of thing you had in mind?

With kids who have been in school as long as your son, and haven't had a great time there (to put it mildly) the first and most important step is to spend loooooots of time decompressing. He needs time to heal, emotionally and psychologically, from his schooling. So from your perspective, the first, most important things to read are about deschooling, and from there reading about what learning really looks like.

All that being said, here's a page with links to essays on unschooling atypical kids:

http://sandradodd.com/specialunschooling

---Meredith





[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Miguelkll

Ok.That makes sense. I guess "special needs" is one of those school phrases I will have to get out of my thought process. When I say "mostly nonverbal".. well he can speak but has such anxiety that he generally does not speak at all outside of home. At home we are able
tomcimmunicate verbally, but he does not communicate outside of home much at all.
Based on what I am reading so far, deschooling is exactly what he needs. Thanks again!
I hope I can get the hang of this in time!
 
Jenn

--- On Sun, 4/25/10, plaidpanties666 <plaidpanties666@...> wrote:







All that being said, here's a page with links to essays on unschooling atypical kids:

http://sandradodd. com/specialunsch ooling

---Meredith











[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Cindy Miller

Welcome Andrea,

I am a planner too.  Since  beginning unschooling I get my planner/organizer needs met by following my kids interest and scheduling events that go along with those interests.  Example:  Oldest son wants to learn archery....we discussed how busy we are this summer so he agreed to wait until the Fall....that gives me time to find a place and add it to our life.  My younger son loves Star Wars so when the local library had a Star Wars Trivia Day I made sure to add it to my calender, invite one of his favorite friends, grab the light sabers and head on over.  Sometimes I plan activities and on that day my kids will tell me they changed their mind and don't want to participate so we don't go.  The only exception to this is if I have paid for an activity that at they time they said they wanted to attend.  If mommy pays we go because wasting resources (money) is not wise.  :-)

Cindy



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Schuyler

>> The only exception to this is if I have paid for an activity that at they time
>>they said they wanted to attend. If mommy pays we go because wasting resources
>>(money) is not wise. :-)<<

We've not gone to stuff that's been paid for. I figure the money's spent whether
we go or not. Actually, I feel better not attending something that I've paid for
then not attending something that I may be relied upon to attend. The only
things I tend to think of as committed events are things at which we are needed.
Like dancing out with our Morris side or something where I've promised to bring
something or Simon or Linnaea have. But money is rarely a determinant of
attendance.

Schuyler


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Joyce Fetteroll

> The only exception to this is if I have paid for an activity that
> at they time
> they said they wanted to attend. If mommy pays we go because wasting
> resources
> (money) is not wise. :-)

The consequence of not being able to drop something that doesn't turn
out to be what was expected is they can decide not to try things.
Which, in terms of unschooling goals, is a big loss.

What they can end up learning is that you value money more than you
value their feelings. They don't have the experience with the world to
be able to understand what something will be like before they've tried
it. Even adults can't be sure! But you *choosing* not to quit an
activity because of a personal value isn't at all the same as your
husband not allowing you to quit because of his personal values.

Kids don't need to be taught an adult view of money. Their view of
money will slowly change with age -- because they're getting older,
not because someone's teaching them.

Live your values. Use them as guides to help you make decisions for
yourself and them. If "not wasting money" is important to you, find
opportunities to explore interests that cost little or nothing. Ask if
the kids can try a class before they sign up. (Because, honestly, the
leader doesn't want kids who are attending against their will any more
than the kids do!) If *you* decide to spend the money, that's your
choice. The burden of following your definition of "not wasting money"
shouldn't be moved to their shoulders.

If it helps, you can look at paying for a class as buying an
opportunity to explore and not as x minutes of classroom time. Their
explorations may lead them to discover that there are certain
personalities they don't get along with, that reality sometimes
doesn't match their imaginings, that that aspect of life isn't as
interesting as they expected, and many many other things. They are
learning about life and more about what the like and dislike about the
world and more about who they are whether they complete something or
not.

I found that when I knee jerk said of course she had to go to class
that day, that she *really* didn't want to go, but when I caught
myself and gave her the option, more often than not she chose to go.
What was important to her was being able to choose to put up with the
bad parts (usually a longer drive than she felt like that day) to get
to the good parts. Being *made* to put up with the bad parts for the
good parts tends to taint the good parts.

Joyce

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

JJ

> > The only exception to this is if I have paid for an activity that
> > at they time
> > they said they wanted to attend. If mommy pays we go because wasting
> > resources
> > (money) is not wise. :-)
>

Since we are talking about food in the other thread: do you make your children clean their plates, thinking that wasting food is not wise? Do you really believe that's the lesson they learn from feeling force-fed?

As Joyce says, it's unfortunately more likely that what they will "learn" from being made to follow through digesting something they don't want, is a lesson not very wise for you to be teaching them . . .

lylaw

From: Joyce Fetteroll
Sent: Wednesday, July 13, 2011 4:17 AM
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] Re: Newbie here



> The only exception to this is if I have paid for an activity that
> at they time
> they said they wanted to attend. If mommy pays we go because wasting
> resources
> (money) is not wise. :-)>>>



I wrote a blog post about this topic, if you (or anyone) is interested:



http://lylawolf.blogspot.com/2011/03/real-costs-of-parental-pressure.html



lyla


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

JJ

Joyce suggested: "If it helps, you can look at paying for a class as buying an opportunity to explore and not as x minutes of classroom time."


Yes, exactly right. My dad was a UF business professor who as a sideline spent 25 years slowly developing 80 acres of beautiful lake lots near our family homestead in the SC/NC/GA triangle. I remember learning from his patient explanations about contracting for options to purchase, rather than contracting for purchase directly. You would pay a small percentage of the total cost to temporarily reserve the opportunity to buy it without having to make the full commitment until you were ready.

I remember it so clearly because I remember how hard it was for me as a teenager to wrap my mind around the idea that it wasn't a waste of money to buy the opportunity but then not take it. I also felt like it was wasteful to put in the option purchase on top of the price if it *did* lead to purchase later. It's not inituitive until you consciously come to value what my dad in all matters personal and professional, literally called "keeping your options open." :)