Joe, Beth, Aquaila, Skylar, Kortlen, & C

Hello all,
Thank you so much for this list! I'm considering hs'ing my 6 year old son
(K) who is currently attending 1st grade in public school. I also have 2
older daughters that are in 4th & 6th, but they are fine in public school &
don't want to withdraw... as well as an almost 8 month old son (C).

My son, however, is another story. He comes home every day telling us that
his teacher is mean & that he has no friends & that people pick on him. He
doesn't want to go to school in the mornings, he just cries. He's the one
that brought it up!!! He asked if I could homeschool him one night last
week when we were working on his homework with him. He said, "It's almost
like you're homeschooling me. Mommy, can you homeschool me?" He's asked
every little bit since. He came home Tuesday with a big knot on his head
where a kid had hit him in the head w/ a digger thing in the sandbox. I
asked him if he went to the nurse & he said he was afraid to ask b/c his
teacher is mean. :o( He had a headache b/c of it. On Monday, he brought
his citizenship card home w/ marks for talking on 2 days. I thought he was
going to bawl when he told me that a boy in his class was being mean to him
& he was telling him to leave him alone & got in trouble for talking.

I'm pretty sure I could get whatever books I'd need used online, I could
possibly even trade for them on Diaperswappers.com or Amitymama.com, or
other sites like those. I know that there are other parents in Perry
County
that HS. I know the girls don't want to, which is fine w/ me. They're
older & have activities they don't want to miss out on (specifically
volleyball for the oldest) the younger one has sooo many friends & I think
she needs the interaction with them. K can still do sports (soccer &
t-ball/baseball) & we could start going to church more often so he could
see
kids more, if that were a problem for him.

He just breaks my heart. I know I can't protect him from the big bad world
forever, but I really want to try! At the same time, I know he needs to
get
used to people being jerks. It just kills me that he is sooo sensitive,
and
compassionate for other people...I told Joe (husband) that I guess I'll
have
to teach C to be tougher & not care so much for people...I just don't know
what to do. He's sooooo smart & learns so quickly.

I've really been soul-searching & reading up on it & the laws about it.
He'd only have to be in "school" for 180 days, the same amount as the
girls.
I could follow their calendar. There are no standardized tests, no set
curriculum requirements, basically the dept of education considers home
schools "private schools". I could do so many things with him that would
be
real-life & educational at the same time. I know I've seen pics in the
local paper of hs groups taking field trips, etc. Things like cooking
(addition, fractions) sewing (measuring, cutting, following directions &
math), reading, grammar (this was my FAVORITE in school). We could do
music
& art & go to the library & have "P.E." (might even help me there! lol)
Nature walks, I could even teach him Spanish & sign language. I know I
could do it...I really think I could. I'm pretty excited about the
possibility...just the cost is daunting right now...& is
impossible...unless
I can trade...which is a real possibility. I know I could do it, the only
thing I worry about is him listening to me lol.

So, my main questions are as follows:
Have you ever pulled a child out of pub school in the middle of the year?

Is HS'ing a big adjustment for the PS child?

How do you choose which "curriculum" to use?

Tell me about the different methods of HS'ing? I've seen several
mentioned,
traditional, co-op, unschooling & a couple others. Which is best? How do
you know what they need to know (in the even they want to re-enter PS in
later years)?

Is there anything else I should take into consideration before making my
final decision?

Thanks soooo much for reading this & for your time!

Beth in Indiana

wisdomalways5

--- In [email protected], "Joe, Beth, Aquaila,
Skylar, Kortlen, & Curry" <jbaskc@...> wrote:
>
So, my main questions are as follows:
> Have you ever pulled a child out of pub school in the middle of
the year?

yes i took my son out in the middle of 5th grade-

>
> Is HS'ing a big adjustment for the PS child?

depends on if you are "doing school at home" or "unschooling" it is
two very different things. I tried to school at home and used the
public school ciriculum as a guide since I thought I would send him
back in a year. School at home "works" for some families who want to
make sure the kids know the same things that schooled kids have to
know.

unschooling is very different it is not doing school- there are
varrying degrees- some people let the child choose what he wants to
learn and then "learns" it in the traditional manner (books, papers,
internet, classes), others allow the child to learn what they want
to but still hold onto traditional methods of parenting (chores,
limits,) there are still others who want what is called radical
unschooling which is trusting that the child knows what they want
from birth and they can be co-partners in the household. It is
letting go of the need to control and let them fly.

Unschooling is about trusting that your child will learn what they
need to by living life- they learn to walk because they see us
walking and it works faster than crawling, they learn to talk so
they can tell us what the heck they want, they learn to read because
they see you reading and they have books around them and tv too.
They learn to do math by living in the real world and do ing
everyday math, they learn to write because they see the written word
and want to do it, they learn history and science by watching tv,
video and books and current events.

They learn because they are human- they learn what is important to
them not what is important to their parents or the school system.
They learn because they want to, they need to - to satisfy their own
thirst for knowledge.

Unschooling is scary for begining because it is scary to "trust"
your child to take care of themself with you as facilitator not
teacher. It takes his interests and let him go from there from one
thing to the next in his own time and space and time.

my daughter is 4.5 and she is unschooled- she is amazing- sponge bob
teaches her a lot of new things and the computer has 6 games that
are hers, these games taught her the abc's and is teaching her to
read. she could type her name first and surprised me that she could
write her name. All without a lesson. She knows a lot of things that
are not "schooly" but important anyway. She is free to eat and sleep
and think and play and learn and do what SHE wants to and needs to.
We do not have chores but she loves to vacumm and clean when she
wants to, she eats when and what she wants and loves to tell her
older schooled friends that homeschool is fun- no I will not be
putting her into school she is mush too free for that

your son and you will need to deschool (take a long break) before
unschooling- declare summer break and just play and have fun. Read
about unschooling and deschooling and listen to your heart and his
pleas.

I hope this helps
JulieH


>
> How do you choose which "curriculum" to use?
>
> Tell me about the different methods of HS'ing? I've seen several
> mentioned,
> traditional, co-op, unschooling & a couple others. Which is
best? How do
> you know what they need to know (in the even they want to re-
enter PS in
> later years)?
>
> Is there anything else I should take into consideration before
making my
> final decision?
>
> Thanks soooo much for reading this & for your time!
>
> Beth in Indiana
>

[email protected]

> your son and you will need to deschool (take a long break) before
> unschooling- declare summer break and just play and have fun. Read
> about unschooling and deschooling and listen to your heart and his
> pleas.
>
> I hope this helps
> JulieH

Some good on-line places to read to better understand unschooling:

www.sandradodd.com/unschooling

www.joyfullyrejoycing.com

www.organiclearning.org ("Connections" E-Zine, which you'll see on this site, is only $10 a year).

Some good books for better understanding unschooling:

"Parenting a Free Child: An Unschooled Life" by Rue Kream (list moderator here and all-around wise and gentle woman ).

Anything by John Holt, but perhaps start with "How Children Learn", "How Children Fail" and "Teach Your Own" (which I'm sure he would've retitled if he'd had time <g>). These should be available at your library.

Robin B.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

>>>I know he needs to
get
used to people being jerks.<<<

I don't believed that children need to learn to get used to people being
jerks. Being around jerks is "contagious". It makes other children jerks, so
that they can fit in. It is hard enough for a parent to be around jerks.
Children do not need to be around this. If he is home schooled, and develops a
strong sense of self, and self confidence, then he will be less likely
succumb to the peer pressure of also being a jerk when he is in an adult world. No
one deserves to be treated poorly. Your son deserves to be treated with
dignity and respect. Thus, he will grow up to be an adult that treats others
with dignity and respect. No child needs to, or deserves to be bullied. This
is one of the major reasons why many chose to homeschool.

>>It just kills me that he is sooo sensitive,
and
compassionate for other people<<

What great qualities to have! Those characteristics can be a great use when
he is older. Maybe he will be a doctor that actually has bedside manner!!!
Don't let his good qualities be squashed by having him in school, where him
being him is made out to being a bad thing by jerks.

As far as finances, I remember seeing books out about homeschooling on a
dime. If you google or look at amazon.com, you may be able to find them.

Good luck!



Warmly,
Cynthia



************************************** Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL at
http://discover.aol.com/memed/aolcom30tour


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Allison

I have 5 kids all "unschooled." We are on a very slim budget. I find
all workbooks, books, games, computer games and stuff for arts and
crafts at thrift stores, yard sales and flea markets very cheep. I
have been very blessed to find what we need at little cost. So I
don't think that you need to worry about the costs. Where there is a
will there is a way.
>

>
> I'm pretty sure I could get whatever books I'd need used online,
I could
> possibly even trade for them on Diaperswappers.com or
Amitymama.com, or
> other sites like those.
>
I'm pretty excited about the
> possibility...just the cost is daunting right now...& is
> impossible...unless
> I can trade...which is a real possibility.
>
>
> How do you choose which "curriculum" to use?
>
>
> Beth in Indiana
>

[email protected]

Beth,

All I can say is if he is asking you to homeschool, jump on the opportunity and pull him out immediately. My daughter begged me to "home teach' her all through the first thru third grades. It broke my heart but I worked full time and did not see how I could have done it. In retrospect, I could have hooked up with the unschooling community and probably worked it out by switching shifts and paying someone to keep her in thier home on the days I could not cover. But at the time I had no information and knew no one else who homeschooled or unschooled. She was ok in fourth and fifth grades due to some very unconventional teachers, but sixth thru eighth was hell. She endured all that school and I really regret it. Don't put your son through it.
Kathryn
in Ca.

-------------- Original message --------------
From: "Joe, Beth, Aquaila, Skylar, Kortlen, & Curry" <jbaskc@...>
Hello all,
Thank you so much for this list! I'm considering hs'ing my 6 year old son
(K) who is currently attending 1st grade in public school. I also have 2
older daughters that are in 4th & 6th, but they are fine in public school &
don't want to withdraw... as well as an almost 8 month old son (C).

My son, however, is another story. He comes home every day telling us that
his teacher is mean & that he has no friends & that people pick on him. He
doesn't want to go to school in the mornings, he just cries. He's the one
that brought it up!!! He asked if I could homeschool him one night last
week when we were working on his homework with him. He said, "It's almost
like you're homeschooling me. Mommy, can you homeschool me?" He's asked
every little bit since. He came home Tuesday with a big knot on his head
where a kid had hit him in the head w/ a digger thing in the sandbox. I
asked him if he went to the nurse & he said he was afraid to ask b/c his
teacher is mean. :o( He had a headache b/c of it. On Monday, he brought
his citizenship card home w/ marks for talking on 2 days. I thought he was
going to bawl when he told me that a boy in his class was being mean to him
& he was telling him to leave him alone & got in trouble for talking.

I'm pretty sure I could get whatever books I'd need used online, I could
possibly even trade for them on Diaperswappers.com or Amitymama.com, or
other sites like those. I know that there are other parents in Perry
County
that HS. I know the girls don't want to, which is fine w/ me. They're
older & have activities they don't want to miss out on (specifically
volleyball for the oldest) the younger one has sooo many friends & I think
she needs the interaction with them. K can still do sports (soccer &
t-ball/baseball) & we could start going to church more often so he could
see
kids more, if that were a problem for him.

He just breaks my heart. I know I can't protect him from the big bad world
forever, but I really want to try! At the same time, I know he needs to
get
used to people being jerks. It just kills me that he is sooo sensitive,
and
compassionate for other people...I told Joe (husband) that I guess I'll
have
to teach C to be tougher & not care so much for people...I just don't know
what to do. He's sooooo smart & learns so quickly.

I've really been soul-searching & reading up on it & the laws about it.
He'd only have to be in "school" for 180 days, the same amount as the
girls.
I could follow their calendar. There are no standardized tests, no set
curriculum requirements, basically the dept of education considers home
schools "private schools". I could do so many things with him that would
be
real-life & educational at the same time. I know I've seen pics in the
local paper of hs groups taking field trips, etc. Things like cooking
(addition, fractions) sewing (measuring, cutting, following directions &
math), reading, grammar (this was my FAVORITE in school). We could do
music
& art & go to the library & have "P.E." (might even help me there! lol)
Nature walks, I could even teach him Spanish & sign language. I know I
could do it...I really think I could. I'm pretty excited about the
possibility...just the cost is daunting right now...& is
impossible...unless
I can trade...which is a real possibility. I know I could do it, the only
thing I worry about is him listening to me lol.

So, my main questions are as follows:
Have you ever pulled a child out of pub school in the middle of the year?

Is HS'ing a big adjustment for the PS child?

How do you choose which "curriculum" to use?

Tell me about the different methods of HS'ing? I've seen several
mentioned,
traditional, co-op, unschooling & a couple others. Which is best? How do
you know what they need to know (in the even they want to re-enter PS in
later years)?

Is there anything else I should take into consideration before making my
final decision?

Thanks soooo much for reading this & for your time!

Beth in Indiana




[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Christy Mahoney

Hi Beth,

I wouldn't hesitate to pull your son out of school. There are
definitely some people here who have done so, but there is a big
unschooling conference going on this week in North Carolina, and
many of the regulars at this site are participating in the
conference. So, you may not get as many replies as usual right
now :)

I also do not agree that he needs to get used to people being
jerks. Wouldn't it be wonderful if we were all surprised to find
jerks? It's pretty great if kids know that they deserve to be
treated well. Why would it be acceptable to be whacked in the
head? If an adult got hit by someone else, it would be considered
assault.

>
> Is HS'ing a big adjustment for the PS child?

It depends on the child and probably how long they've been in school
too. Your son is very young!

>
> How do you choose which "curriculum" to use?
>
> Tell me about the different methods of HS'ing? I've seen several
> mentioned,
> traditional, co-op, unschooling & a couple others. Which is
best?

Well, this is specifically an unschooling site, so we feel that
unschooling is best:) As unschoolers, we do not use any curriulum.
I encourage you to do some more reading about unschooling and also
to try to relax. As far as finding things to do and people to be
with, how about you follow your son's lead? Just hang out at home
for a bit and let him decompress. Gradually he will probably tell
you what he wants - more friends, sports, books, games, etc. You
could go to the library and just pick out a variety of stuff to see
what he likes. There's no need to rush. Ask him if he wants to go
to the playground or to church or to an orchard or a farm or a
construction site or a movie or a lake or a sports event or whatever
he's interested in, and let him know that you take him seriously.

If he doesn't think that his teacher would help him out when someone
hits him, show him that you will help him when he needs it. It's
great that he's young and will tell you what is bothering him and
what he wants. A lot of kids stop telling their parents these
things after trying and being ignored or not taken seriously.
You're his mom! You can help him enjoy life again and help him to
know that it's not okay for people to hit him or for his teacher to
be mean to him. He's six years old, and he needs your help.

Good luck! And welcome to the site. There are a lot of links here
as well as all the previous messages that will give you a ton of
info.

-Christy M.

infreondscipe

Hi Beth,

I have been where you are and I have to say that I don't think you
can get your boy out fast enough.

We had absolutely no trouble transitioning to homeschool. We
consider removing him from ps to be the best parenting decision we've
ever made. Our son was thrilled with it then and is still thrilled
with it now 8yrs later. He even talks about homeschooling his own
children someday.

There are SO many philosophies and curriculums and methods that will
be a wonderful match for your boy I'm sure. I would absolutely
recommend de-schooling before you choose one. Your dear one is so
young you can take some time to breathe, regain trust and investigate
all the different methods. We are radical unschoolers now but
started off unschooling, then homeschooling then unschooling again
and have been RUNing for several years now. If I had it to do over
(only 1 child here :) I would have started out unschooling and never
wasted our time with anything else - but what works for us may not be
for you and hindsight is 20/20, yes?

Best of luck to you and your children!
Chris in Idaho

Local Support for Idahoans:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Idaho_Secular_Homeschoolers
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/soidunschool
www.idunschool.org - Contributors Needed!


--- In [email protected], "Joe, Beth, Aquaila,
Skylar, Kortlen, & Curry" <jbaskc@...> wrote:
>
> Hello all,
> Thank you so much for this list! I'm considering hs'ing my 6 year
old son
> (K) who is currently attending 1st grade in public school. I also
have 2
> older daughters that are in 4th & 6th, but they are fine in public
school &
> don't want to withdraw... as well as an almost 8 month old son (C).
>
> My son, however, is another story. He comes home every day
telling us that
> his teacher is mean & that he has no friends & that people pick on
him. He
> doesn't want to go to school in the mornings, he just cries. He's
the one
> that brought it up!!! He asked if I could homeschool him one
night last
> week when we were working on his homework with him. He
said, "It's almost
> like you're homeschooling me. Mommy, can you homeschool me?"
He's asked
> every little bit since. He came home Tuesday with a big knot on
his head
> where a kid had hit him in the head w/ a digger thing in the
sandbox. I
> asked him if he went to the nurse & he said he was afraid to ask
b/c his
> teacher is mean. :o( He had a headache b/c of it. On Monday, he
brought
> his citizenship card home w/ marks for talking on 2 days. I
thought he was
> going to bawl when he told me that a boy in his class was being
mean to him
> & he was telling him to leave him alone & got in trouble for
talking.
>
> I'm pretty sure I could get whatever books I'd need used online, I
could
> possibly even trade for them on Diaperswappers.com or
Amitymama.com, or
> other sites like those. I know that there are other parents in
Perry
> County
> that HS. I know the girls don't want to, which is fine w/ me.
They're
> older & have activities they don't want to miss out on
(specifically
> volleyball for the oldest) the younger one has sooo many friends
& I think
> she needs the interaction with them. K can still do sports
(soccer &
> t-ball/baseball) & we could start going to church more often so he
could
> see
> kids more, if that were a problem for him.
>
> He just breaks my heart. I know I can't protect him from the big
bad world
> forever, but I really want to try! At the same time, I know he
needs to
> get
> used to people being jerks. It just kills me that he is sooo
sensitive,
> and
> compassionate for other people...I told Joe (husband) that I guess
I'll
> have
> to teach C to be tougher & not care so much for people...I just
don't know
> what to do. He's sooooo smart & learns so quickly.
>
> I've really been soul-searching & reading up on it & the laws
about it.
> He'd only have to be in "school" for 180 days, the same amount as
the
> girls.
> I could follow their calendar. There are no standardized tests,
no set
> curriculum requirements, basically the dept of education considers
home
> schools "private schools". I could do so many things with him
that would
> be
> real-life & educational at the same time. I know I've seen pics
in the
> local paper of hs groups taking field trips, etc. Things like
cooking
> (addition, fractions) sewing (measuring, cutting, following
directions &
> math), reading, grammar (this was my FAVORITE in school). We
could do
> music
> & art & go to the library & have "P.E." (might even help me there!
lol)
> Nature walks, I could even teach him Spanish & sign language. I
know I
> could do it...I really think I could. I'm pretty excited about the
> possibility...just the cost is daunting right now...& is
> impossible...unless
> I can trade...which is a real possibility. I know I could do it,
the only
> thing I worry about is him listening to me lol.
>
> So, my main questions are as follows:
> Have you ever pulled a child out of pub school in the middle of
the year?
>
> Is HS'ing a big adjustment for the PS child?
>
> How do you choose which "curriculum" to use?
>
> Tell me about the different methods of HS'ing? I've seen several
> mentioned,
> traditional, co-op, unschooling & a couple others. Which is
best? How do
> you know what they need to know (in the even they want to re-enter
PS in
> later years)?
>
> Is there anything else I should take into consideration before
making my
> final decision?
>
> Thanks soooo much for reading this & for your time!
>
> Beth in Indiana
>

Donna Vanderlip

I have been reading the messages here for several weeks now and have felt such tremendous support. Now I am in the midst of what seems to be the deschooling process. I am a teacher, teaching in Thailand...and as a family we have decided to unschool. My husband and I have done lots of research and reading but it is soooooo difficult to witness the process of unschooling. It seems like both my children have some healing to do around learning and some of the things they found joy in have been put aside. They used to love reading but seem to stay away from it now. They are on the computer a great deal and watch movies lots and we are doing all in our power to stand back and allow them the time they need to find their way back to the joy of learning. I never thought, as a teacher, that I would remove my students from school but like others have said it is the best parenting decision I think we have ever made. we go forward with some regret that we didn't do it from the
start. Thanks for all the support. Donna and Brian parents of Kora 10 and Lukas 9

infreondscipe <infreondscipe@...> wrote: Hi Beth,

I have been where you are and I have to say that I don't think you
can get your boy out fast enough.

We had absolutely no trouble transitioning to homeschool. We
consider removing him from ps to be the best parenting decision we've
ever made. Our son was thrilled with it then and is still thrilled
with it now 8yrs later. He even talks about homeschooling his own
children someday.

There are SO many philosophies and curriculums and methods that will
be a wonderful match for your boy I'm sure. I would absolutely
recommend de-schooling before you choose one. Your dear one is so
young you can take some time to breathe, regain trust and investigate
all the different methods. We are radical unschoolers now but
started off unschooling, then homeschooling then unschooling again
and have been RUNing for several years now. If I had it to do over
(only 1 child here :) I would have started out unschooling and never
wasted our time with anything else - but what works for us may not be
for you and hindsight is 20/20, yes?

Best of luck to you and your children!
Chris in Idaho

Local Support for Idahoans:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Idaho_Secular_Homeschoolers
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/soidunschool
www.idunschool.org - Contributors Needed!


--- In [email protected], "Joe, Beth, Aquaila,
Skylar, Kortlen, & Curry" <jbaskc@...> wrote:
>
> Hello all,
> Thank you so much for this list! I'm considering hs'ing my 6 year
old son
> (K) who is currently attending 1st grade in public school. I also
have 2
> older daughters that are in 4th & 6th, but they are fine in public
school &
> don't want to withdraw... as well as an almost 8 month old son (C).
>
> My son, however, is another story. He comes home every day
telling us that
> his teacher is mean & that he has no friends & that people pick on
him. He
> doesn't want to go to school in the mornings, he just cries. He's
the one
> that brought it up!!! He asked if I could homeschool him one
night last
> week when we were working on his homework with him. He
said, "It's almost
> like you're homeschooling me. Mommy, can you homeschool me?"
He's asked
> every little bit since. He came home Tuesday with a big knot on
his head
> where a kid had hit him in the head w/ a digger thing in the
sandbox. I
> asked him if he went to the nurse & he said he was afraid to ask
b/c his
> teacher is mean. :o( He had a headache b/c of it. On Monday, he
brought
> his citizenship card home w/ marks for talking on 2 days. I
thought he was
> going to bawl when he told me that a boy in his class was being
mean to him
> & he was telling him to leave him alone & got in trouble for
talking.
>
> I'm pretty sure I could get whatever books I'd need used online, I
could
> possibly even trade for them on Diaperswappers.com or
Amitymama.com, or
> other sites like those. I know that there are other parents in
Perry
> County
> that HS. I know the girls don't want to, which is fine w/ me.
They're
> older & have activities they don't want to miss out on
(specifically
> volleyball for the oldest) the younger one has sooo many friends
& I think
> she needs the interaction with them. K can still do sports
(soccer &
> t-ball/baseball) & we could start going to church more often so he
could
> see
> kids more, if that were a problem for him.
>
> He just breaks my heart. I know I can't protect him from the big
bad world
> forever, but I really want to try! At the same time, I know he
needs to
> get
> used to people being jerks. It just kills me that he is sooo
sensitive,
> and
> compassionate for other people...I told Joe (husband) that I guess
I'll
> have
> to teach C to be tougher & not care so much for people...I just
don't know
> what to do. He's sooooo smart & learns so quickly.
>
> I've really been soul-searching & reading up on it & the laws
about it.
> He'd only have to be in "school" for 180 days, the same amount as
the
> girls.
> I could follow their calendar. There are no standardized tests,
no set
> curriculum requirements, basically the dept of education considers
home
> schools "private schools". I could do so many things with him
that would
> be
> real-life & educational at the same time. I know I've seen pics
in the
> local paper of hs groups taking field trips, etc. Things like
cooking
> (addition, fractions) sewing (measuring, cutting, following
directions &
> math), reading, grammar (this was my FAVORITE in school). We
could do
> music
> & art & go to the library & have "P.E." (might even help me there!
lol)
> Nature walks, I could even teach him Spanish & sign language. I
know I
> could do it...I really think I could. I'm pretty excited about the
> possibility...just the cost is daunting right now...& is
> impossible...unless
> I can trade...which is a real possibility. I know I could do it,
the only
> thing I worry about is him listening to me lol.
>
> So, my main questions are as follows:
> Have you ever pulled a child out of pub school in the middle of
the year?
>
> Is HS'ing a big adjustment for the PS child?
>
> How do you choose which "curriculum" to use?
>
> Tell me about the different methods of HS'ing? I've seen several
> mentioned,
> traditional, co-op, unschooling & a couple others. Which is
best? How do
> you know what they need to know (in the even they want to re-enter
PS in
> later years)?
>
> Is there anything else I should take into consideration before
making my
> final decision?
>
> Thanks soooo much for reading this & for your time!
>
> Beth in Indiana
>






---------------------------------
Be smarter than spam. See how smart SpamGuard is at giving junk email the boot with the All-new Yahoo! Mail

---------------------------------
Be smarter than spam. See how smart SpamGuard is at giving junk email the boot with the All-new Yahoo! Mail

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

rpindc04

Donna and Brian,

I sympathize with your deschooling experience, as we am going through
the same thing right now. Our ds (age 10) stays glued to one screen
or another most of the time, when left to his own devices. But, even
though it has ony been a couple of months since I would say we
started deschooling, we are seeing some positive signs. He seems
happier. He appears less stressed. He smiles more. He's more willing
to try some new adventures. I think we are observing something about
just how stressful school was, and about how it was not about
learning, in many ways, but, in our case, about coping.

It is discouraging that ds does not want to read. Last school year he
seemed to love reading, devouring 400-page books like they were
nothing. Now, it's one or two reference books for a few minutes every
now and then. He likes being read to sometimes, so we keep doing
that. I trust it will return to him when he is ready.

I also regret I did not hs from the start, but there were
circumstances then that dictated what I could do, and I have to get
over that. We are where we are today, and there is so much we can
learn together. I do believe those who say we parents need to
deschool in this period, too. It is a challenge to keep letting go of
old ways of seeing him, and expectations about what he should be
doing. I re-focus myself on this every day, as it is not yet a habit.
I remind myself to watch, listen to him. And, we do different fun
things out of the house like meeting other hs-ers, going to different
museums/parks/gardens, going on long hikes. And, I try to keep my
fretting to a minimum, and private. This seems like such a huge life-
lesson time for each of us, and all of us as a family.

I plan to deschool for 6 months and then see where we are.

Good luck.


Robbin



--- In [email protected], Donna Vanderlip
<donnavanderlip@...> wrote:
>
> I have been reading the messages here for several weeks now and
have felt such tremendous support. Now I am in the midst of what
seems to be the deschooling process. I am a teacher, teaching in
Thailand...and as a family we have decided to unschool. My husband
and I have done lots of research and reading but it is soooooo
difficult to witness the process of unschooling. It seems like both
my children have some healing to do around learning and some of the
things they found joy in have been put aside. They used to love
reading but seem to stay away from it now. They are on the computer
a great deal and watch movies lots and we are doing all in our power
to stand back and allow them the time they need to find their way
back to the joy of learning. I never thought, as a teacher, that I
would remove my students from school but like others have said it is
the best parenting decision I think we have ever made. we go forward
with some regret that we didn't do it from the
> start. Thanks for all the support. Donna and Brian parents of
Kora 10 and Lukas 9
>
> infreondscipe <infreondscipe@...> wrote: Hi Beth,
>
> I have been where you are and I have to say that I don't think you
> can get your boy out fast enough.
>
> We had absolutely no trouble transitioning to homeschool. We
> consider removing him from ps to be the best parenting decision
we've
> ever made. Our son was thrilled with it then and is still thrilled
> with it now 8yrs later. He even talks about homeschooling his own
> children someday.
>
> There are SO many philosophies and curriculums and methods that
will
> be a wonderful match for your boy I'm sure. I would absolutely
> recommend de-schooling before you choose one. Your dear one is so
> young you can take some time to breathe, regain trust and
investigate
> all the different methods. We are radical unschoolers now but
> started off unschooling, then homeschooling then unschooling again
> and have been RUNing for several years now. If I had it to do over
> (only 1 child here :) I would have started out unschooling and
never
> wasted our time with anything else - but what works for us may not
be
> for you and hindsight is 20/20, yes?
>
> Best of luck to you and your children!
> Chris in Idaho
>
> Local Support for Idahoans:
> http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Idaho_Secular_Homeschoolers
> http://groups.yahoo.com/group/soidunschool
> www.idunschool.org - Contributors Needed!
>
>
> --- In [email protected], "Joe, Beth, Aquaila,
> Skylar, Kortlen, & Curry" <jbaskc@> wrote:
> >
> > Hello all,
> > Thank you so much for this list! I'm considering hs'ing my 6 year
> old son
> > (K) who is currently attending 1st grade in public school. I also
> have 2
> > older daughters that are in 4th & 6th, but they are fine in
public
> school &
> > don't want to withdraw... as well as an almost 8 month old son
(C).
> >
> > My son, however, is another story. He comes home every day
> telling us that
> > his teacher is mean & that he has no friends & that people pick
on
> him. He
> > doesn't want to go to school in the mornings, he just cries. He's
> the one
> > that brought it up!!! He asked if I could homeschool him one
> night last
> > week when we were working on his homework with him. He
> said, "It's almost
> > like you're homeschooling me. Mommy, can you homeschool me?"
> He's asked
> > every little bit since. He came home Tuesday with a big knot on
> his head
> > where a kid had hit him in the head w/ a digger thing in the
> sandbox. I
> > asked him if he went to the nurse & he said he was afraid to ask
> b/c his
> > teacher is mean. :o( He had a headache b/c of it. On Monday, he
> brought
> > his citizenship card home w/ marks for talking on 2 days. I
> thought he was
> > going to bawl when he told me that a boy in his class was being
> mean to him
> > & he was telling him to leave him alone & got in trouble for
> talking.
> >
> > I'm pretty sure I could get whatever books I'd need used online,
I
> could
> > possibly even trade for them on Diaperswappers.com or
> Amitymama.com, or
> > other sites like those. I know that there are other parents in
> Perry
> > County
> > that HS. I know the girls don't want to, which is fine w/ me.
> They're
> > older & have activities they don't want to miss out on
> (specifically
> > volleyball for the oldest) the younger one has sooo many friends
> & I think
> > she needs the interaction with them. K can still do sports
> (soccer &
> > t-ball/baseball) & we could start going to church more often so
he
> could
> > see
> > kids more, if that were a problem for him.
> >
> > He just breaks my heart. I know I can't protect him from the big
> bad world
> > forever, but I really want to try! At the same time, I know he
> needs to
> > get
> > used to people being jerks. It just kills me that he is sooo
> sensitive,
> > and
> > compassionate for other people...I told Joe (husband) that I
guess
> I'll
> > have
> > to teach C to be tougher & not care so much for people...I just
> don't know
> > what to do. He's sooooo smart & learns so quickly.
> >
> > I've really been soul-searching & reading up on it & the laws
> about it.
> > He'd only have to be in "school" for 180 days, the same amount as
> the
> > girls.
> > I could follow their calendar. There are no standardized tests,
> no set
> > curriculum requirements, basically the dept of education
considers
> home
> > schools "private schools". I could do so many things with him
> that would
> > be
> > real-life & educational at the same time. I know I've seen pics
> in the
> > local paper of hs groups taking field trips, etc. Things like
> cooking
> > (addition, fractions) sewing (measuring, cutting, following
> directions &
> > math), reading, grammar (this was my FAVORITE in school). We
> could do
> > music
> > & art & go to the library & have "P.E." (might even help me
there!
> lol)
> > Nature walks, I could even teach him Spanish & sign language. I
> know I
> > could do it...I really think I could. I'm pretty excited about the
> > possibility...just the cost is daunting right now...& is
> > impossible...unless
> > I can trade...which is a real possibility. I know I could do it,
> the only
> > thing I worry about is him listening to me lol.
> >
> > So, my main questions are as follows:
> > Have you ever pulled a child out of pub school in the middle of
> the year?
> >
> > Is HS'ing a big adjustment for the PS child?
> >
> > How do you choose which "curriculum" to use?
> >
> > Tell me about the different methods of HS'ing? I've seen several
> > mentioned,
> > traditional, co-op, unschooling & a couple others. Which is
> best? How do
> > you know what they need to know (in the even they want to re-
enter
> PS in
> > later years)?
> >
> > Is there anything else I should take into consideration before
> making my
> > final decision?
> >
> > Thanks soooo much for reading this & for your time!
> >
> > Beth in Indiana
> >
>
>
>
>
>
>
> ---------------------------------
> Be smarter than spam. See how smart SpamGuard is at giving junk
email the boot with the All-new Yahoo! Mail
>
> ---------------------------------
> Be smarter than spam. See how smart SpamGuard is at giving junk
email the boot with the All-new Yahoo! Mail
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>

Jennifer Gloodt

We took our son out of 4th grade at the end of February 2007. He was
in 4th grade. Sometimes I feel SO guilty that I didn't homeschool
(unschool!) from the very start. It just eats away at me! He was SO
happy to leave school.
I still remember his first day of kindergarten, and the tears in my
eyes as he walked into the school with the other 5 & 6-years old
kids. I want to go back and start right then, and tell him he doesn't
have to go into that dumb school and sit for hours...
I remember him being so excited about going to school, and how much
fun it was... in kindergarten.. in the beginning of the year.. then
the teacher was mean.
Then came 1st grade, and the teacher was mean.
Then came 2nd grade.. and this teacher really was mean- I could hear
her yelling at the kids from the hallway outside the classroom.
We moved to a different school district halfway through 2nd grade.
The new school, right across the street from our new house, was not
any better. In fact, it was worse!
Not just in the lack of quality teachers, but the system was so very
out of whack.
It is just so sad.
I love being home with my son (11) and daughter (2).
My son is so much happier now that he has time to do the things he
loves to do. Ok, so for the past few months, much of that time is
consumed with the Nintendo DS. And the computer. And twice-a-day
episodes of Myth Busters and late night episodes of Naruto on Cartoon
Network.
But I can't say I don't notice every single night, after his "shows",
he gets into bed and reads The Boxcar Children, or Deltora Quest, or
whatever he is into that week.
And his creativity is not gone in the least. Even the school system
couldn't take that away from him. I'm just glad we pulled him out of
there before they had the chance to sap it.
I feel like we are truly living life now. We have the opportunity to
enjoy it. He can be a child.



So, my main questions are as follows:
> > Have you ever pulled a child out of pub school in the middle of
> the year?
> >
> > Is HS'ing a big adjustment for the PS child?
> >
> > How do you choose which "curriculum" to use?
> >
> > Tell me about the different methods of HS'ing? I've seen several
> > mentioned,
> > traditional, co-op, unschooling & a couple others. Which is
> best? How do
> > you know what they need to know (in the even they want to re-
enter
> PS in
> > later years)?
> >
> > Is there anything else I should take into consideration before
> making my
> > final decision?
> >
> > Thanks soooo much for reading this & for your time!
> >
> > Beth in Indiana

Schafer Vanessa

Hi Beth,

My name is Vanessa, and I have been
homeschooling/unschooling my children since the end of
last year. It was really odd, because I wanted to
pull them (I have 2 kids, 1 son and 1 daughter) out of
school during Easter break, but hubby wanted to have
them end the year in ps. My son was in 4th grade, and
my daughter was in 3rd.

We had alot of issues with teachers, the principal and
bullying. Needless to say, my son was miserable, and
so was my daughter. We researched about
homeschooling, and found some good books at the
library, and also alot of information at Sandra Dodd's
website. I also had alot of support from the groups
that I have joined.

I think for you homeschooling choices, you need to
find what fits with your family. With us the choice
was easy. After all the stuff they had to do with ps,
we decided that unschooling was a much better fit with
our lifestyle. We didn't want to take the kids out of
school, and then put them right back at it, at the
kitchen table. We did however buy the 4th and 5th
grade all in one curriculum workbook from Sam's Club (
I think it was about $10). Me and the kids opened it
up, and looked at some of the stuff it had for them to
do, and closed them. We haven't taken them off the
shelf since.

It's amazing to see how much they can learn, when they
relax, and show me the things that they are interested
in. Kids are truely amazing.

My son loves to play video games, and search for
things on the internet, and loves watching Naruto.
It's gotten to the point, that I really get into
watching it with him. We have some really good
discussions about the characters, and what we think
might be their next moves, the Naruto books that are
out, and who our favorite characters are. We even
found a store not too far from here that carries some
Naruto stuff. We have learned about what takes the
yucky stuff off from pennies, and what it takes to dig
up hostas, and things about hurricanes. I like
unschooling, because you learn things from living
life, not by sitting at the table for hours learning
from books.

I don't think anyone can tell you which way to go. It
all depends on what you feel you need to do. My kids
won't attend public school anymore. They are happiest
at home, doing the things they enjoy. There are books
that tell you what your child should know at each
grade level.

I hope this helps. I forgot to mention that we live
in Michigan. We are happy homeschoolers, and enjoy
the freedom that homeschooling provides. We travel
more now, than we did before, and have alot of fun
noticing things outside, that we normally wouldn't
see.

Good luck on your decision. If your son would like a
pen pal, let me know. I know my son would love to be
able to talk to kids about Naruto. It's his favorite
subject.

---Vanessa
Mom of Tyler 11, and Alexandra 10


--- Jennifer Gloodt <jennifergloodt@...> wrote:

> We took our son out of 4th grade at the end of
> February 2007. He was
> in 4th grade. Sometimes I feel SO guilty that I
> didn't homeschool
> (unschool!) from the very start. It just eats away
> at me! He was SO
> happy to leave school.
> I still remember his first day of kindergarten, and
> the tears in my
> eyes as he walked into the school with the other 5 &
> 6-years old
> kids. I want to go back and start right then, and
> tell him he doesn't
> have to go into that dumb school and sit for
> hours...
> I remember him being so excited about going to
> school, and how much
> fun it was... in kindergarten.. in the beginning of
> the year.. then
> the teacher was mean.
> Then came 1st grade, and the teacher was mean.
> Then came 2nd grade.. and this teacher really was
> mean- I could hear
> her yelling at the kids from the hallway outside the
> classroom.
> We moved to a different school district halfway
> through 2nd grade.
> The new school, right across the street from our new
> house, was not
> any better. In fact, it was worse!
> Not just in the lack of quality teachers, but the
> system was so very
> out of whack.
> It is just so sad.
> I love being home with my son (11) and daughter (2).
> My son is so much happier now that he has time to do
> the things he
> loves to do. Ok, so for the past few months, much of
> that time is
> consumed with the Nintendo DS. And the computer. And
> twice-a-day
> episodes of Myth Busters and late night episodes of
> Naruto on Cartoon
> Network.
> But I can't say I don't notice every single night,
> after his "shows",
> he gets into bed and reads The Boxcar Children, or
> Deltora Quest, or
> whatever he is into that week.
> And his creativity is not gone in the least. Even
> the school system
> couldn't take that away from him. I'm just glad we
> pulled him out of
> there before they had the chance to sap it.
> I feel like we are truly living life now. We have
> the opportunity to
> enjoy it. He can be a child.
>
>
>
> So, my main questions are as follows:
> > > Have you ever pulled a child out of pub school
> in the middle of
> > the year?
> > >
> > > Is HS'ing a big adjustment for the PS child?
> > >
> > > How do you choose which "curriculum" to use?
> > >
> > > Tell me about the different methods of HS'ing?
> I've seen several
> > > mentioned,
> > > traditional, co-op, unschooling & a couple
> others. Which is
> > best? How do
> > > you know what they need to know (in the even
> they want to re-
> enter
> > PS in
> > > later years)?
> > >
> > > Is there anything else I should take into
> consideration before
> > making my
> > > final decision?
> > >
> > > Thanks soooo much for reading this & for your
> time!
> > >
> > > Beth in Indiana
>
>
>



____________________________________________________________________________________
Luggage? GPS? Comic books?
Check out fitting gifts for grads at Yahoo! Search
http://search.yahoo.com/search?fr=oni_on_mail&p=graduation+gifts&cs=bz

Meredith

--- In [email protected], "rpindc04" <robbin_mp@...>
wrote:
>> It is discouraging that ds does not want to read. Last school
year he
> seemed to love reading, devouring 400-page books like they were
> nothing. Now, it's one or two reference books for a few minutes
every
> now and then. He likes being read to sometimes, so we keep doing
> that. I trust it will return to him when he is ready.

Something I've noticed with my "always unschooled" younger child is
that she goes through cycles of learning and interest. She'll spend
a few months being passionate about reading, for example, and then
drop it entirely for awhile and focus on something else - cutting
paper, at the moment.

Certainly kids who have been in school have some baggage to overcome
and healing to do - my stepson is still healing in many ways after
nearly a year away from school. Its good to be aware, though, that
natural learning frequently doesn't look as "well rounded" as school-
type learning is intended to be. Its *natural* for people to immerse
themselves in an interest for a period of time and allow other
interests to wane or even drop them entirely.

---Meredith (Mo 6, Ray 13)

Deb

>>cycles of learning and interest.

Learning is a lot like eating - you eat some then you digest some.
While digesting, you may or may not want to browse the menu/buffet
table. And, digesting is basically invisible (except the occasional
burp or whatever), just as learning is inside the learner. You
really don't want to go poking someone's stomach to make sure
they're full, that can get messy. And, too, if you've had a not-so-
great experience with fried clams, you're not likely to want
anything that LOOKS like a fried clam for quite a while. The more
someone pushes you to "just try these" the more likely you are to
back off. But, if you are given time and allowed to come back to it
in your own time you may find that you like clam chowder but still
not fried clams. I know I always thought I hated avocadoes. And no
one pushed me on it. Then one day, I ordered a salad at a restaurant
and, yup you guessed it, it had nice fresh avocado slices on it. I
was in love. The problem was that I had mostly only ever seen them
mashed up into "gloppy moldy" as I used to call, guacamole to the
rest of the world and the only times I had tried it, it was way too
spicy for me. But, I've found that I love fresh avocado in salads,
in home made (not too spicy) guacamole, and in really fresh sushi.

--Deb

Donna Vanderlip

Thank you for this Merideth. This is important to remember in the deschooling process and the learning to unschool process. I stiff feel so sad that my kids have let some reading go. I work hard to keep the panic inside as I watch them choose only computer games and movies. We do have some remarkable moments together and the stress of school and homework has completely left our lives. After a couple of months I have no doubt it is the right thing to do I only hope that I will see all their interests of creativity and love of learning trickle back with the same passion I used to see before school did its damage. I so appreciate what gets shared here it surely helps me to keep being patient and to keep trusting my children. Donna
Meredith <meredith@...> wrote: --- In [email protected], "rpindc04" <robbin_mp@...>
wrote:
>> It is discouraging that ds does not want to read. Last school
year he
> seemed to love reading, devouring 400-page books like they were
> nothing. Now, it's one or two reference books for a few minutes
every
> now and then. He likes being read to sometimes, so we keep doing
> that. I trust it will return to him when he is ready.

Something I've noticed with my "always unschooled" younger child is
that she goes through cycles of learning and interest. She'll spend
a few months being passionate about reading, for example, and then
drop it entirely for awhile and focus on something else - cutting
paper, at the moment.

Certainly kids who have been in school have some baggage to overcome
and healing to do - my stepson is still healing in many ways after
nearly a year away from school. Its good to be aware, though, that
natural learning frequently doesn't look as "well rounded" as school-
type learning is intended to be. Its *natural* for people to immerse
themselves in an interest for a period of time and allow other
interests to wane or even drop them entirely.

---Meredith (Mo 6, Ray 13)






---------------------------------
Ask a question on any topic and get answers from real people. Go to Yahoo! Answers.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

txtechgirl98

Hi Everyone,

My family and I just moved to the Dallas area in August and we are
trying to find a home. I have been trying to research school
districts and such, but I am becoming more and more anxious about
sending our daughter to school next year. I have been considering
homeschooling for the last 4 years and I was just curious how you came
to the decision to homeschool. No holding back! Please be homest--
the more information, the better :) Thank you

Kimberly

Robert Saxon

Kimberly,

We've been living in the Dallas area for several years, so welcome!

How did we decide? Several factors.

We did not like how the school system is inflexible regarding how each kid
learns. It was more that the child must learn the way the school teaches,
and if the child has difficulty learning that way, well, he/she has a
"learning disability" or is "average". School appeared to us to be great as
long as the child in question learns best being spoon-fed information and
not allowed a lot of personal creativity. The school system also appeared
to enforce "obedience," and though spankings are now unheard-of in my neck
of the woods, schools have become creative in how they punish children. I
didn't want to put my kids through that, especially as dd#2 is a very
physical, spirited kid. She would definitely be labeled as having some kind
of "disability." dd#1 is a lot more pliable, and in my mind more delicate.
I don't want her creativity getting snuffed out, though I'm sure she would
"thrive" (ha-ha) in school.

Reinforcing this was the work of John Holt. That really put us on the road
to trusting our kids with their own learning and curiosity. Some of his
stuff was absolutely amazing and made so much sense.

Add to this what John Taylor Gatto has put out. He claims (and I believe
him) that the school system was put in place to create obedient factory
workers. That factory could be an assembly line or being a code jockey like
me. He has more claims, but please check him out as well as John Holt.

--Rob
DH to Seana for 10 years
"Daddy!" to Genevieve (almost 6!) and Elissa (4.5)


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]