stacyzme

I have read many of John Holts books and numerous unschooling
websites/blogs and I am both excited and nervous. Most of the
featured families seem to live much more enriching lives than our
family. I am not complaining, I love our life and felt content, but
now I wonder if it is "enough" of an environment to unschool. We
live in the suburbs instead of on a farm or in a city, although we
do go to museums and outings a couple times a month. We don't have
a homebased enterprise where the children can learn about economics
and we don't have jobs where we can take them. I do volunteer work,
but it is with battered women, so I can't involve the kids there,
although I am sure that there are community programs where the kids
could get involved if we decided to go in that direction instead. I
am not super creative, although I can work a glue gun in a pinch,
but I don't make my own furniture or clothes. We do enjoy our
children and like spending time with them, and as we are learning
more about unschooling we are shedding a lot of our prior notions
about what is kid stuff and what is for adults (although I still
can't get hubby to let dear son use power tools----he is 4)
So I guess I am wondering how average (god I hate that word) people
unschool. Do they? Or maybe this is also an opportunity to really
examine the "averageness" of our lives and make some changes? Are
there any reading materials that include how children are soaking up
knowledge in the midst of conventional life? Or are the featured
families I am reading about not the norm but the "goal"?

Deb

We don't live on a farm or in a city - it's 15-20 minutes to the
mall (and DS has his own Starbuck's card lol). I WOH fulltime, DH is
fulltime at home with DS. Our days consist of lots of videogames
(both DH and DS love them, I'm just getting going on an old GameBoy
with Pokemon Ruby), movies, TV, occasional campfires in the back
yard (don't forget the 'smores!!), lots of time hanging out with our
games (both guys have Nintendo DSs and I have the GBA) at Starbucks.
We look at stars when the night sky is really clear - but we don't
know all the constellations and we don't (yet) have a super
telescope. Yesterday DH spent a good part of the day making a case
for his DS from duct tape (it's pretty cool). DS and I want one too
so we're going to Staples tonight to pick up multi colors of duct
tape. Most of what goes into blogs and postings are the "highlights"
and occasional "lowlights", not the average days. I might post about
how DS did this or that cool thing but that's one "postable" thing
among dozens of days.

A typical week is basically: I work, they game, housework gets done,
we eat on a fairly regular basis, grocery shopping gets done, we
watch movies/TV (old episodes of MASH and Monty Python are 'hot' at
our house right now), we play with the dog, watch the fish in the
fish tank (nothing 'fancy', some mollies, some neon tetras, and of
course the scum sucker fish), maybe play some board games. That's
about it. Oh, we do have one 'date night' per week, that alternates
between DH and DS (I get 4 dates each month, they each get 2). When
DH and I go out, DS visits MIL and FIL.

I wouldn't write off the kids being involved with your volunteer
work. Yes, they probably can't come with you BUT they could
collect/donate toys for the kids of the women that come through the
shelter (for example).

You're focusing on what you don't have, don't do, etc. What DO you
have? What DO you love? What DO the kids love? If there are things
you'd love to do but haven't, look for ways to explore them. Big
exciting stuff all the time isn't really typical as far as I've
seen. Curiousity about the whole world is. And when you're curious
about everyone and everything, life really isn't so boring -there's
always something new to explore, do, learn - whether it's clearing a
bit of backyard space for a firepit or learning how to make sushi or
shopping in an ethnic market or going to a park in a different part
of town. Your kids already know this, learn from them.

--Deb

Meredith

--- In [email protected], "stacyzme" <stacyzme@...>
wrote:
>> I do volunteer work,
> but it is with battered women, so I can't involve the kids there,
> although I am sure that there are community programs where the
kids
> could get involved if we decided to go in that direction instead.

That's something to look into if your kids are interested - maybe
see if there's a food pantry associated with the shelter so all
y'all can work together.

But the overall question is more "are the kids bored"? Real life
isn't always mile-a-minute excitement, and that's a good thing. I
enjoy having long days of doing "nothing much" with my kids -
nesting.

That sort of thing doesn't make good press, so it doesn't get
written about much. Yesterday, my dd and I made playdoh and she and
Ray played on the new PS2 most of the day. She climbed trees and
spun on her sit-n-spin at various times, found a little mud to
smoosh, and dug a really nice hole in the sawdust pile. Ray worked
on making a spear and did some target-practice with it in between
playing on the PS2. That's about it. Pretty normal day. We do have
some excitement now and then, but our life is pretty cozy, rather
than thrilling.

---Meredith (Mo 5.5, Ray 13)

oum rayan

I've been struggling with the same concerns about whether our 'average' life measures up for
an unschooling environment. Some of the unschooler's blogs I've read from various sites have left me questioning if I am a slacker! Granted, I have a new baby, and have to let a LOT of things go, but I have a hard time watching my 4.8yo occupy himself so much with TV and video games, which I allow only so I can have a breather. But when I take stock of what we accomplish in a days' time, from conversations we have (that a month later he'll repeat ver-batem), to cooking time shared, and the oh-so-many learning opportunities that fall in-between our 'activities'. I'm raising a compassionate, self-motivated, well grounded little boy, who is a joy to be around.
I guess the question is, am I self-motivated? In my own way, I am. During my entire childhood I had a scheduled life. To this day, my mother attempts to impose a schedule on me (to no avail). I have chosen an unscheduled life, whereby I live by inspiration. 'What do I feel like doing now' is what I live by. I offer the same lifestyle to my children. I feel it is their right, as is it mine. When I am still, inspiration comes. Some days I crave learning new things. I find my 4.8yo is the same (as I presume we all are, given the freedom to be still long enough to listen to ourselves.)
Writing gives me clarity, and I have found the reassurance I was seeking by just writing about this. I guess one unschooling principle that applies to this subject is 'not imposing outside standards/expectations on our children's development.' Now if we could only figure out how to take that advice re: our own parental development!

stacyzme <stacyzme@...> wrote:
I have read many of John Holts books and numerous unschooling
websites/blogs and I am both excited and nervous. Most of the
featured families seem to live much more enriching lives than our
family. I am not complaining, I love our life and felt content, but
now I wonder if it is "enough" of an environment to unschool. We
live in the suburbs instead of on a farm or in a city, although we
do go to museums and outings a couple times a month. We don't have
a homebased enterprise where the children can learn about economics
and we don't have jobs where we can take them. I do volunteer work,
but it is with battered women, so I can't involve the kids there,
although I am sure that there are community programs where the kids
could get involved if we decided to go in that direction instead. I
am not super creative, although I can work a glue gun in a pinch,
but I don't make my own furniture or clothes. We do enjoy our
children and like spending time with them, and as we are learning
more about unschooling we are shedding a lot of our prior notions
about what is kid stuff and what is for adults (although I still
can't get hubby to let dear son use power tools----he is 4)
So I guess I am wondering how average (god I hate that word) people
unschool. Do they? Or maybe this is also an opportunity to really
examine the "averageness" of our lives and make some changes? Are
there any reading materials that include how children are soaking up
knowledge in the midst of conventional life? Or are the featured
families I am reading about not the norm but the "goal"?






---------------------------------
Be a PS3 game guru.
Get your game face on with the latest PS3 news and previews at Yahoo! Games.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Nance Confer

unschoolingbasicsSo your kids haven't won the spelling bee, enrolled in college at 12 and found a cure for cancer? You are not hosting cow milking lessons while wearing your denim jumper? You and the kids did not build your home from the plans on the back of a cereal box?

And, yet, some of us manage to unschool. :)

A dear unschooling friend and I joke that nobody really suspects what we are up to. We look so white bread suburban it is ridiculous. She's driving around in her minivan and me in my (very used :) ) Volvo station wagon. The kids are being carted to this event or that activity. DH's both go to work and we Moms stay home. How "Leave It To Beaver" could we look?? :)

But the secret is that what things look like from the outside is not what matters.

My kids are being carted to things they chose! For instance.

When we are at home, we are not sitting around the kitchen table crunching math worksheets. We are online or DS is gaming or DH and DD are puttering in the yard or we are lounging with whatever book we picked up at the library or. . . etc. . . just glorious everyday life. In a loving home with mutual support.

We have not built any rocket ships in the kitchen sink but we do what we want to do and are happily unschooling. And you can too! :)

Nance



5a.
Is my life too boring for unschooling?
Posted by: "stacyzme" stacyzme@... stacyzme
Tue Jun 26, 2007 6:10 am (PST)
I have read many of John Holts books and numerous unschooling
websites/blogs and I am both excited and nervous. Most of the
featured families seem to live much more enriching lives than our
family. I am not complaining, I love our life and felt content, but
now I wonder if it is "enough" of an environment to unschool.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Deb

--- In [email protected], "Nance Confer"
<marbleface@...> wrote:
> You are not hosting cow milking lessons while wearing your denim
>jumper?

LOL I always love it when this stereotype pops up because DH is the at
home parent with DS, going places and doing things. He'd look so
loverly in a denim jumper with his big old beard! Think a youngish
Santa (pre-white hair) in a jumper and that'd be DH. It'd make it a
little tough getting in and out of our big, black Ford F150 fullsize
pickup. LOL

--Deb

Lesa

Nance,

I love that.... can I put that on my blog?



Lesa M.
Crunchy Unschooling mom to dd10
Currently reading "The Road Less Traveled"

http://livinginfreedomeveryday.blogspot.com/

"I say that with cruelty and oppression, it is everybody's business to
interfere when they see it." - Anna Sewell

-------Original Message-------

From: Nance Confer
Date: 06/27/07 06:42:42
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] Is my life too boring for unschooling?

unschoolingbasicsSo your kids haven't won the spelling bee, enrolled in
college at 12 and found a cure for cancer? You are not hosting cow milking
lessons while wearing your denim jumper? You and the kids did not build your
home from the plans on the back of a cereal box?

And, yet, some of us manage to unschool. :)

A dear unschooling friend and I joke that nobody really suspects what we are
up to. We look so white bread suburban it is ridiculous. She's driving
around in her minivan and me in my (very used :) ) Volvo station wagon. The
kids are being carted to this event or that activity. DH's both go to work
and we Moms stay home. How "Leave It To Beaver" could we look?? :)

But the secret is that what things look like from the outside is not what
matters.

My kids are being carted to things they chose! For instance.

When we are at home, we are not sitting around the kitchen table crunching
math worksheets. We are online or DS is gaming or DH and DD are puttering in
the yard or we are lounging with whatever book we picked up at the library
or. . . etc. . . just glorious everyday life. In a loving home with mutual
support.

We have not built any rocket ships in the kitchen sink but we do what we
want to do and are happily unschooling. And you can too! :)

Nance

5a.
Is my life too boring for unschooling?
Posted by: "stacyzme" stacyzme@... stacyzme
Tue Jun 26, 2007 6:10 am (PST)
I have read many of John Holts books and numerous unschooling
websites/blogs and I am both excited and nervous. Most of the
featured families seem to live much more enriching lives than our
family. I am not complaining, I love our life and felt content, but
now I wonder if it is "enough" of an environment to unschool.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]





[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Brian & Alexandra Polikowsky

> You are not hosting cow milking lessons while wearing your denim
>jumper?


Hey you ALL...<<<G>>> We don't give any " lessons" on milking cows but if any of you ever want to come milk some we can certainly show you how.
And my DH wears bibs/jeans overalls ( AKA denin jumper ) everyday morning and night to milk our cows...lol.
My ds wears them with a red shirt so he can be like Super Mario ( he couldn'd care less about the cows right now).

Alex ( who married a Dairy Farmer and lives with the cows)

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

stacyzme

I really appreciate all the responses! I guess I knew that it would
be okay, but just needed some mirroring that it is enough just to live
and learn together. I need to be gentle with myself as well in this
adventure. Of course it goes against everything I and most people
know about education and the trust will grow over time. I feel like I
am about to jump off a high dive without being able to see that there
is water underneath.

So by the way where are those cows lol......

Kathleen Gehrke

--- In [email protected], "stacyzme" <stacyzme@...>
wrote:
>
> I feel like I
> am about to jump off a high dive without being able to see that
there
> is water underneath.
>

The water is fine!!!!!

JUMP!

and enjoy.

Kathleen

Nance Confer

unschoolingbasicsSure. I'm certain it's been said better but use what helps! :)

Nance

****

Nance,

I love that.... can I put that on my blog?

Lesa M.


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Lesa

That's faith, baby! Jump! It's the most refreshing water ever!


Lesa M.
Crunchy Unschooling mom to dd10
Currently reading "The Road Less Traveled"

http://livinginfreedomeveryday.blogspot.com/

"I say that with cruelty and oppression, it is everybody's business to
interfere when they see it." - Anna Sewell

-------Original Message-------

From: Kathleen Gehrke
Date: 06/27/07 21:58:04
To: [email protected]
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Re: Is my life too boring for unschooling?

--- In [email protected], "stacyzme" <stacyzme@...>
wrote:
>
> I feel like I
> am about to jump off a high dive without being able to see that
there
> is water underneath.
>

The water is fine!!!!!

JUMP!

and enjoy.

Kathleen



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