Can you Deschool to long?
[email protected]
We have been homeschooling for not quite 2 yrs. Jan will be 2 yrs. When we
came home we did school at home for about 3mnths and then stopped doing
everything. At the time I didnt realize their even was this term deschooling.
My daughter was pulled out midway through 1st grade BUT she did 3 (hanging
head in sadness over losing so much time with her) yrs of full day prek at our
public school starting at age 3. My son was mid year Kindergarten and had 1
yr of prek. My son who is now 7 seems to be doing great, finding interests,
learning from anything and everything. My daughter who is 9 though gets
horrible headaches when anything is too schooly for her. She even lately has been
telling me she doesnt want me to read to her because she feels like im
pushing her to read and she just cant take the stress. So my question is can you
deschool too long? If so how do you move forward? Thanks
Chrissy in IL
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
came home we did school at home for about 3mnths and then stopped doing
everything. At the time I didnt realize their even was this term deschooling.
My daughter was pulled out midway through 1st grade BUT she did 3 (hanging
head in sadness over losing so much time with her) yrs of full day prek at our
public school starting at age 3. My son was mid year Kindergarten and had 1
yr of prek. My son who is now 7 seems to be doing great, finding interests,
learning from anything and everything. My daughter who is 9 though gets
horrible headaches when anything is too schooly for her. She even lately has been
telling me she doesnt want me to read to her because she feels like im
pushing her to read and she just cant take the stress. So my question is can you
deschool too long? If so how do you move forward? Thanks
Chrissy in IL
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Lesa
>>>If so how do you move forward? <<<What is your version of moving forward?
Lesa
http://lifeacademy.homeschooljournal.net
http://stores.ebay.com/qtpiecraftsthings
-------Original Message-------
From: Homeschlfor2@...
Date: 10/24/06 15:04:01
To: [email protected]
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Can you Deschool to long?
We have been homeschooling for not quite 2 yrs. Jan will be 2 yrs. When we
came home we did school at home for about 3mnths and then stopped doing
everything. At the time I didnt realize their even was this term deschooling
My daughter was pulled out midway through 1st grade BUT she did 3 (hanging
head in sadness over losing so much time with her) yrs of full day prek at
our
public school starting at age 3. My son was mid year Kindergarten and had 1
yr of prek. My son who is now 7 seems to be doing great, finding interests,
learning from anything and everything. My daughter who is 9 though gets
horrible headaches when anything is too schooly for her. She even lately has
been
telling me she doesnt want me to read to her because she feels like im
pushing her to read and she just cant take the stress. So my question is can
you
deschool too long? Thanks
Chrissy in IL
.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 10/24/2006 3:21:22 PM Central Daylight Time,
lesajm@... writes:
What is your version of moving forward?
Good question. I guess im just concerned that she is so overwhelmed that
she is just shutting down and how do I help her yet not make matters worse? I
wasnt and am not bothered by her not reading at all but yet am a bit
concerned that she no longer wants me to read to her. She was before cooking with me
and wanting to help and now she will only help if I do all the measuring and
she just mixes which is fine..... I just dont want to be missing something
that I should be doing. This could all be normal and that would be great!
Chrissy
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
lesajm@... writes:
What is your version of moving forward?
Good question. I guess im just concerned that she is so overwhelmed that
she is just shutting down and how do I help her yet not make matters worse? I
wasnt and am not bothered by her not reading at all but yet am a bit
concerned that she no longer wants me to read to her. She was before cooking with me
and wanting to help and now she will only help if I do all the measuring and
she just mixes which is fine..... I just dont want to be missing something
that I should be doing. This could all be normal and that would be great!
Chrissy
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
cherylwarnke
Maybe there is an underlying problem to her headaches. Maybe she
needs glasses, or maybe she just does feel overwhelmed with the
reading or being read to that it is stressing her. She is probably
entering puberty and that could be the basis for her stress and
feelings of overwhelm.
Check out www.raisingadaughter.com
http://www.raisingadaughter.com/index.php?
option=com_content&task=view&id=19&Itemid=32 - It talks about puberty
and the different "steps".
If it really is that she is uninterested, then she is uninterested.
We did a couple of really great unit studies quite a few years back
that interested my kids. My kids liked something and we poured
ourselves into it. They still do, but in the older levels now.
Stuff we did:
Little House on the Prairie, lots of cooking, sewing, reading the
stories, watching the movies; lots of great information at the
library; or
Puppets. We once took an old refrigerator box and made a puppet
theatre out of it. We painted it with some leftover paint, cut out
an area at the top for them to do their puppet acts while being in
the box, made curtains, made some puppets and then my kids wrote cute
little plays to perform for us.
I have items laying around the house that my kids are interested in.
Rock and Fossil books, magnifying glasses, rocks, jewlery making
books, comic books, paper and paint, lots of craft items, cardboard,
etc. My youngest is really big into collecting comic books right
now. He has bought some comic books, checks out their prices on -
ebay and in a comic book price guide and also tells me which ones he
is looking for. Neopets is another good internet site for children.
Anyways, I wouldn't stress yourself about it too much. It took my
kids a long time to deschool and now there is no stopping them. Now,
I can't afford everything they want to do and learn about.
Good Luck.
Cheryl
needs glasses, or maybe she just does feel overwhelmed with the
reading or being read to that it is stressing her. She is probably
entering puberty and that could be the basis for her stress and
feelings of overwhelm.
Check out www.raisingadaughter.com
http://www.raisingadaughter.com/index.php?
option=com_content&task=view&id=19&Itemid=32 - It talks about puberty
and the different "steps".
If it really is that she is uninterested, then she is uninterested.
We did a couple of really great unit studies quite a few years back
that interested my kids. My kids liked something and we poured
ourselves into it. They still do, but in the older levels now.
Stuff we did:
Little House on the Prairie, lots of cooking, sewing, reading the
stories, watching the movies; lots of great information at the
library; or
Puppets. We once took an old refrigerator box and made a puppet
theatre out of it. We painted it with some leftover paint, cut out
an area at the top for them to do their puppet acts while being in
the box, made curtains, made some puppets and then my kids wrote cute
little plays to perform for us.
I have items laying around the house that my kids are interested in.
Rock and Fossil books, magnifying glasses, rocks, jewlery making
books, comic books, paper and paint, lots of craft items, cardboard,
etc. My youngest is really big into collecting comic books right
now. He has bought some comic books, checks out their prices on -
ebay and in a comic book price guide and also tells me which ones he
is looking for. Neopets is another good internet site for children.
Anyways, I wouldn't stress yourself about it too much. It took my
kids a long time to deschool and now there is no stopping them. Now,
I can't afford everything they want to do and learn about.
Good Luck.
Cheryl
Schafer Vanessa
Chrissy,
I don't know about deschooling too long, but I was
told one month per every year your child was in
school. I am still new to this, but I do know that my
daughter would stress over math (it's been hard for
her), and I would get calls from school to come and
get her, because she had a stomach ache. Stress does
really wierd things to your body, and my daughter
would get stomach aches from the stress/anxiety of
doing math. It might just be stress/anxiety. You
might have to give up on the reading for a while, and
come back to it, when she gets more interest in it.
Sooner or later the head aches will disappear, and she
will be ready to read again. (or she may need
glasses.)
Good luck!!!
---Vanessa
--- Lesa <lesajm@...> wrote:
__________________________________________________
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I don't know about deschooling too long, but I was
told one month per every year your child was in
school. I am still new to this, but I do know that my
daughter would stress over math (it's been hard for
her), and I would get calls from school to come and
get her, because she had a stomach ache. Stress does
really wierd things to your body, and my daughter
would get stomach aches from the stress/anxiety of
doing math. It might just be stress/anxiety. You
might have to give up on the reading for a while, and
come back to it, when she gets more interest in it.
Sooner or later the head aches will disappear, and she
will be ready to read again. (or she may need
glasses.)
Good luck!!!
---Vanessa
--- Lesa <lesajm@...> wrote:
> >>>If so how do you move forward? <<<Vanessa
>
> What is your version of moving forward?
>
>
> Lesa
> http://lifeacademy.homeschooljournal.net
> http://stores.ebay.com/qtpiecraftsthings
>
> -------Original Message-------
>
> From: Homeschlfor2@...
> Date: 10/24/06 15:04:01
> To: [email protected]
> Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Can you Deschool to
> long?
>
> We have been homeschooling for not quite 2 yrs. Jan
> will be 2 yrs. When we
> came home we did school at home for about 3mnths and
> then stopped doing
> everything. At the time I didnt realize their even
> was this term deschooling
>
> My daughter was pulled out midway through 1st grade
> BUT she did 3 (hanging
> head in sadness over losing so much time with her)
> yrs of full day prek at
> our
> public school starting at age 3. My son was mid year
> Kindergarten and had 1
> yr of prek. My son who is now 7 seems to be doing
> great, finding interests,
> learning from anything and everything. My daughter
> who is 9 though gets
> horrible headaches when anything is too schooly for
> her. She even lately has
> been
> telling me she doesnt want me to read to her because
> she feels like im
> pushing her to read and she just cant take the
> stress. So my question is can
> you
> deschool too long? Thanks
>
> Chrissy in IL
> .
>
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been
> removed]
>
>
__________________________________________________
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[email protected]
-----Original Message-----
From: Homeschlfor2@...
So my question is can you deschool too long?
-=-=-
Like everything else: it takes as long as it takes. Somepeople are more
sensitive than others.
-=-=-=-=
My daughter who is 9 though gets
horrible headaches when anything is too schooly for her. She even
lately has
been telling me she doesnt want me to read to her because she feels
like im
pushing her to read and she just cant take the stress.
-=-=-=-
Then she's right. Back off. Do nothing schooly or even remotely
schooly. Just FUN stiff. Let her know you trust her. She'll be there
when she gets there. Not a moment before.
~Kelly
________________________________________________________________________
Check out the new AOL. Most comprehensive set of free safety and
security tools, free access to millions of high-quality videos from
across the web, free AOL Mail and more.
From: Homeschlfor2@...
So my question is can you deschool too long?
-=-=-
Like everything else: it takes as long as it takes. Somepeople are more
sensitive than others.
-=-=-=-=
My daughter who is 9 though gets
horrible headaches when anything is too schooly for her. She even
lately has
been telling me she doesnt want me to read to her because she feels
like im
pushing her to read and she just cant take the stress.
-=-=-=-
Then she's right. Back off. Do nothing schooly or even remotely
schooly. Just FUN stiff. Let her know you trust her. She'll be there
when she gets there. Not a moment before.
~Kelly
________________________________________________________________________
Check out the new AOL. Most comprehensive set of free safety and
security tools, free access to millions of high-quality videos from
across the web, free AOL Mail and more.
Ren Allen
"Just FUN stiff. "
Another slip? ;)
Cuz I was just doing Day of the Dead art and this just seemed so
timely and all. Going back to the dungeon to create some more stiffs
for trading.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
Another slip? ;)
Cuz I was just doing Day of the Dead art and this just seemed so
timely and all. Going back to the dungeon to create some more stiffs
for trading.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
Deb
Just leave stuff available for her - paper, fun markers, glitter glue,
whatever looks fun and interesting - NO STRINGS ATTACHED.
Also, you do whatever interests you and invite her along - maybe get
some candle making stuff or soap making or candy making or knitting or
wood carving or whatever YOU enjoy - and go do it, again NO STRINGS
ATTACHED. Rather than waiting for her to 'move on', get doing yourself.
Third thing I wanted to say was broaden your scope of what 'counts' as
reading. Odds are she is reading more than you are noticing because
you're focused on book reading. What is it she ENJOYS doing? Odds are
that somewhere along the way, there are words involved (videogame
instructions, shopping catalogs, whatever). It's unlikely she's
spending 24/7 staring at the wall - so ask her what you can do
with/for her (including just getting out of her way for a while) -
would she really really like to get outdoors more, go for walks in the
woods, or whatever? or listen to different types of music? or spend
time with animals? or learn to sew or knit or carve fancy pumpkins?
Whatever it is, be a resource to get those things - you've got the car
keys and credit cards but let her lead - you push the cart, let her
fill it. Avoid the temptation to jump in and take over the idea (by
going out and getting a bunch of how to books and supplies and setting
it all up and then pushing her at it) - just sit back and give her
space and time. If she feels like she's being pushed, even if you
don't think you're pushing, you're pushing as far as she's concerned.
Maybe find a time to just go out for coffee together or something and
talk - being in the car is great for talking because you don't have to
look at the other person the whole time. I know when I was growing up,
Mom would often approach difficult topics in the car because it was
easier to talk then - no outside interference (except driving of
course but no phones, TV, siblings, etc) and maybe pose a 'fun'
question - do you ever think people will live on Mars? what would you
do with 24 hrs to spend a million dollars? where in the world would
you most like to live? to vacation? Who (living or dead) would you
most like to have dinner with? what would be an ideal vacation? Or,
maybe, suggest you play "the story game" (as DS calls it) - each
person contributes a sentence then the next person goes so you build a
story one sentence at a time. It can take all sorts of wild turns and
get really funny or serious or spooky or whatever. A few years ago, we
had a multi chapter story of "King Hiam" going with DS - he'd remember
where we left off and we'd continue from there next time we were in
the car for a time. King Hiam decided that all kids had to go to
school but there was a gentle loving family out in the middle of the
forest who didn't send their kids to school (DS' idea). When the king
found out, he went to see them, and in the end (many chapters later)
King Hiam rescinded his rule and let families choose what they wanted
to do, including unschooling.
--Deb
whatever looks fun and interesting - NO STRINGS ATTACHED.
Also, you do whatever interests you and invite her along - maybe get
some candle making stuff or soap making or candy making or knitting or
wood carving or whatever YOU enjoy - and go do it, again NO STRINGS
ATTACHED. Rather than waiting for her to 'move on', get doing yourself.
Third thing I wanted to say was broaden your scope of what 'counts' as
reading. Odds are she is reading more than you are noticing because
you're focused on book reading. What is it she ENJOYS doing? Odds are
that somewhere along the way, there are words involved (videogame
instructions, shopping catalogs, whatever). It's unlikely she's
spending 24/7 staring at the wall - so ask her what you can do
with/for her (including just getting out of her way for a while) -
would she really really like to get outdoors more, go for walks in the
woods, or whatever? or listen to different types of music? or spend
time with animals? or learn to sew or knit or carve fancy pumpkins?
Whatever it is, be a resource to get those things - you've got the car
keys and credit cards but let her lead - you push the cart, let her
fill it. Avoid the temptation to jump in and take over the idea (by
going out and getting a bunch of how to books and supplies and setting
it all up and then pushing her at it) - just sit back and give her
space and time. If she feels like she's being pushed, even if you
don't think you're pushing, you're pushing as far as she's concerned.
Maybe find a time to just go out for coffee together or something and
talk - being in the car is great for talking because you don't have to
look at the other person the whole time. I know when I was growing up,
Mom would often approach difficult topics in the car because it was
easier to talk then - no outside interference (except driving of
course but no phones, TV, siblings, etc) and maybe pose a 'fun'
question - do you ever think people will live on Mars? what would you
do with 24 hrs to spend a million dollars? where in the world would
you most like to live? to vacation? Who (living or dead) would you
most like to have dinner with? what would be an ideal vacation? Or,
maybe, suggest you play "the story game" (as DS calls it) - each
person contributes a sentence then the next person goes so you build a
story one sentence at a time. It can take all sorts of wild turns and
get really funny or serious or spooky or whatever. A few years ago, we
had a multi chapter story of "King Hiam" going with DS - he'd remember
where we left off and we'd continue from there next time we were in
the car for a time. King Hiam decided that all kids had to go to
school but there was a gentle loving family out in the middle of the
forest who didn't send their kids to school (DS' idea). When the king
found out, he went to see them, and in the end (many chapters later)
King Hiam rescinded his rule and let families choose what they wanted
to do, including unschooling.
--Deb
Betsy Hill
**My daughter who is 9 though gets horrible headaches when anything
is too schooly for her. She even lately has been telling me she
doesnt want me to read to her because she feels like I'm pushing her
to read and she just cant take the stress.**
Are the books you are reading from her "schooly" type books? Non
fiction or really factual historical fiction? Does she dislike all
books, or just some of them?
My son, 12, wasn't much into being read to as a little kid but he is
really into it now, and has been for 3 or 4 years. Since he was 6 or
7, he has selected everything that I read to him. People may find
that extreme, but he waved aside nearly everything I suggested and
insisted on his own choices. As an unschooler, I respect that he
knows what he likes.
Betsy
is too schooly for her. She even lately has been telling me she
doesnt want me to read to her because she feels like I'm pushing her
to read and she just cant take the stress.**
Are the books you are reading from her "schooly" type books? Non
fiction or really factual historical fiction? Does she dislike all
books, or just some of them?
My son, 12, wasn't much into being read to as a little kid but he is
really into it now, and has been for 3 or 4 years. Since he was 6 or
7, he has selected everything that I read to him. People may find
that extreme, but he waved aside nearly everything I suggested and
insisted on his own choices. As an unschooler, I respect that he
knows what he likes.
Betsy