Daneyl Carrington

Hello everyone! My name is Daneyl and I am married to a wonderful man, George, for 11 years now. I have 2 children, 10 yo dd, Kaylee, and 8 yo ds, Colton. Right now my children go to a very small (2 classrooms per grade) public school. I am very happy with this school, they have the highest test scores in the county. However, next year is my dd's last year at this school and she will be traveling 30 minutes one way to go to the middle school. I am not looking forward to this at all. I have been doing some research on the unschooling method and I am very interested in it. So basically I'm starting from the beginning on this: figuring out exactly what unschooling is, how it works, what is the outcome of families who have done it for years, etc. So basically I'm looking for any information, suggestions, tips, anything you all can give me. Thank you so much for letting me be a part of this group and I look forward to talking to all of you.
Daneyl


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Joanne

Hello and welcome...my best suggestion is to sit back and read some
of the threads here. There's a lot of information there written by
people who have "been there, done that". Look for posts by Ren,
Kelly and Mary.
My other suggestion is a little bit harder but it's something I
realised very early in our unschooling journey.
It has to start with you. What I mean it, changing the way you look
at education, learning and school will have to start with you.
Welcome again....I hope you enjoy it here as much as I do. :-)

~ Joanne ~
Mom to Jacqueline (7), Shawna (10) & Cimion (13)
Adopted into our hearts October 30, 2003
http://anunschoolinglife.blogspot.com/
http://foreverparents.com







--- In [email protected], Daneyl Carrington
<dunky2000@...> wrote:
>
> Hello everyone! My name is Daneyl and I am married to a wonderful
man, George, for 11 years now. I have 2 children, 10 yo dd, Kaylee,
and 8 yo ds, Colton. Right now my children go to a very small (2
classrooms per grade) public school. I am very happy with this
school, they have the highest test scores in the county. However,
next year is my dd's last year at this school and she will be
traveling 30 minutes one way to go to the middle school. I am not
looking forward to this at all. I have been doing some research on
the unschooling method and I am very interested in it. So basically
I'm starting from the beginning on this: figuring out exactly what
unschooling is, how it works, what is the outcome of families who
have done it for years, etc. So basically I'm looking for any
information, suggestions, tips, anything you all can give me. Thank
you so much for letting me be a part of this group and I look
forward to talking to all of you.
> Daneyl
>
>
> ---------------------------------
> Yahoo! Messenger with Voice. PC-to-Phone calls for ridiculously
low rates.
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>


Jason & LaDonna Harris

Welcome Daneyl for SAHMU.

LaDonna.
----- Original Message -----
From: Daneyl Carrington
To: [email protected]
Sent: Wednesday, April 26, 2006 1:26 PM
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] My introduction


Hello everyone! My name is Daneyl and I am married to a wonderful man, George, for 11 years now. I have 2 children, 10 yo dd, Kaylee, and 8 yo ds, Colton. Right now my children go to a very small (2 classrooms per grade) public school. I am very happy with this school, they have the highest test scores in the county. However, next year is my dd's last year at this school and she will be traveling 30 minutes one way to go to the middle school. I am not looking forward to this at all. I have been doing some research on the unschooling method and I am very interested in it. So basically I'm starting from the beginning on this: figuring out exactly what unschooling is, how it works, what is the outcome of families who have done it for years, etc. So basically I'm looking for any information, suggestions, tips, anything you all can give me. Thank you so much for letting me be a part of this group and I look forward to talking to all of you.
Daneyl


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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]





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[email protected]

-----Original Message-----
From: Daneyl Carrington <dunky2000@...>

>>>>>>Right now my children go to a very small (2 classrooms per grade)
public school.
I am very happy with this school, they have the highest test scores in
the
county.

-=-=-=-

Well, if high test scores impress you, unschooling might not be for
you! <g>

Grades are for meat and eggs, not children!

-=-=-=-=-

>>>>>However, next year is my dd's last year at this school and she
will be
traveling 30 minutes one way to go to the middle school. I am not
looking
forward to this at all.

-=-=--

The travel???

-=-=--=-

>>>>I have been doing some research on the unschooling
method and I am very interested in it.


-=-=-=-

Well, it's not a "method"--it's a philosophy.

It's hard to tell someone *how* to do it. We talk more about *why*.

And it IS very interesting! <bwg>

-=-=-=-

>>>>So basically I'm starting from the
beginning on this: figuring out exactly what unschooling is, how it
works, what
is the outcome of families who have done it for years, etc. So
basically I'm
looking for any information, suggestions, tips, anything you all can
give me.

-=-=-=-

Well, we can do that!

Suggestions are to read here---go through all the archives. You'll be
reading for weeks!

Read at www.SandraDodd.com/unschooling You'll be reading for months!
<g>

Books to check out: all of John Holt

Rue Kream's Parenting a Free Child, An Unschooling Life

Sandra Dodd's Moving a Puddle

Alfie Kohn's Punished by Rewards

Jack Gatto's The Underground History of American Education &
Dumbing Us Down

Frank Smith's The Book of Learning and Forgetting

That'll get you started...

~Kelly

Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://liveandlearnconference.org

Daneyl Carrington

kbcdlovejo@... wrote:





Well, if high test scores impress you, unschooling might not be for
you! <g>

Grades are for meat and eggs, not children!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
After going to a public school my entire life, and sending my kids this long how long does it take to get over the mentality of test scores meaning something? I'm not saying test scores are the most important things in life, I understand they're not. I'm much happier when my children learn something on their own or by asking questions but I come from a family full of teachers who stress test scores all the time.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

-=-=--

The travel???

-=-=--=-
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The travel yes is one thing that concerns me. My main concern though is the school itself. I went there and have a nephew who recently left and things go on there I'm not prepared for my child to learn. So many 12 and 13 year olds pregnant. I know my daughter is not going to be young forever and at some point will have to learn about these things but I would rather be the one to teach her and when she has questions now I answer them honestly. I just want her to mature at her own rate and not because she is thrown into a place where she has to grow up so quickly.

-=-=-=-

Thank you for the reading suggestions. I will definitely check it all out.
Daneyl



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aplan4life

--- In [email protected], Daneyl Carrington
<dunky2000@...> wrote:
---------------------------------------------------
> After going to a public school my entire life, and sending my kids
this long how long does it take to get over the mentality of test
scores meaning something? I'm not saying test scores are the most
important things in life, I understand they're not. I'm much happier
when my children learn something on their own or by asking questions
but I come from a family full of teachers who stress test scores all
the time.
>
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Hi Daneyl,

A great book that I bought a couple of weeks ago and absolutely love
is "If You Want to Be Rich & Happy, Don't Go to School?: Ensuring
Lifetime Security for Yourself and Your Children", by Robert T.
Kiyosaki....AWESOME! This may be a book to not only help you but your
family of teachers, this isn't a book about homeschooling, its a book
at how messed up the grading/competition is in schools and how
damaging it is to those who cannot meet the standards and also how
damaging it can be to those who do and everyone in between. The book
is an eye-opener in a big way.

~Sandy Winn

[email protected]

In a message dated 4/28/2006 8:29:27 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time,
dunky2000@... writes:

After going to a public school my entire life, and sending my kids this long
how long does it take to get over the mentality of test scores meaning
something? I'm not saying test scores are the most important things in life, I
understand they're not. I'm much happier when my children learn something on
their own or by asking questions but I come from a family full of teachers who
stress test scores all the time.


**********

Perhaps doing some reading about Howard Gardner's multiple intelligences
would help. Test scores only measure a very limited part of our whole
intelligence. I found the book "In Their Own Way" by Thomas Armstrong a good
introduction to this.

Some of the most well-paid people in America are sports stars. They have a
body intelligence most of us do not, standardized tests might tell these
people that they are dumb. Someone else might be *gifted* to work with elderly
or people with diminished mental capacity and make an amazing contribution to
the world, but still be less intelligence in reading and math.....basically
the only two intelligences that are standardized tested.

There is a great essay about standardized testing by David Albert. It is in
his book "Homeschooling and the Voyage of Self-Discovery". It is very
funny; he is taking questions in his daughter's test and showing how every
question could have multiple correct answers or be completely ridiculous to ask a
fourth grader.

I remember taking a standardized test in sixth grade and getting a taste of
"what does this have to do with anything????" The question asked which
military rank was the highest from four choices. I remember being quite angry,
how the hell was I supposed to know? I knew no one in the military and my only
exposure was watching the show m*a*s*h*. We hadn't been studying military
rank in school, either. I went home and probably cried to my mother that I
shouldn't be penalized for just not being exposed to something yet!

Preparing my ground for unschooling, probably! :)

Oh, also read some John Taylor Gatto. I think particularly in the
"Underground History of American Education" he discusses someone's bright idea to test
to manipulate society. You might be able to find it here
_http://www.johntaylorgatto.com/chapters/3f.htm_ (http://www.johntaylorgatto.com/chapters/3f.htm)

Have fun letting go of this one! This was a big leap for me into the world
of unschooling. :)

Leslie in SC


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Pampered Chef Michelle

On 4/28/06, Daneyl Carrington
After going to a public school my entire life, and sending my kids this long
how long does it take to get over the mentality of test scores meaning
something?

***********************
As long as you want to hang on to them. :) If you are an active
participant in your children's lives you don't need a score card telling you
that you are doing well. You will know that you are doing well by them.
*********************

The travel yes is one thing that concerns me. My main concern though is the
school itself. I went there and have a nephew who recently left and things
go on there I'm not prepared for my child to learn. So many 12 and 13 year
olds pregnant.

*********************
My oldest went to half a year of school after being majorly relaxed
homeschooled (we were about to tip over the edge to unschooling) and there
were pregnant girls in fifth grade. Lunch discussions were about who was
still a virgin and who wasn't. Many of these girls hadn't even started
mensruation yet! My daughter's response was, "I just don't think that these
girls are mature enough to be making decisions about sex. They are all so
ill-informed!"




--
Michelle
Independent Kitchen Consultant #413652
The Pampered Chef
850-474-0817
http://www.pamperedchef.biz/michellelr
Ask me how you can save 60% on some of our most favorite products!


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Daneyl Carrington

Thanks Sandy I'll check that one out also.
Daneyl

aplan4life <aplan4life@...> wrote:
Hi Daneyl,

A great book that I bought a couple of weeks ago and absolutely love
is "If You Want to Be Rich & Happy, Don't Go to School?: Ensuring
Lifetime Security for Yourself and Your Children", by Robert T.
Kiyosaki....AWESOME! This may be a book to not only help you but your
family of teachers, this isn't a book about homeschooling, its a book
at how messed up the grading/competition is in schools and how
damaging it is to those who cannot meet the standards and also how
damaging it can be to those who do and everyone in between. The book
is an eye-opener in a big way.

~Sandy Winn







SPONSORED LINKS
Secondary school education Graduate school education Home school education Graduate school education online High school education Chicago school education

---------------------------------
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

>>So basically I'm starting from the beginning on this: figuring out exactly what unschooling is, how it works, what is the outcome of families who have done it for years, etc. So basically I'm looking for any information, suggestions, tips, anything you all can give me.>>

Hi Daneyl and welcome. My suggestion is to read at a couple of good websites and pick up a few unschooling books. You can also hang around here and join the discussions to see what we're all about.

Here are some suggestions:

http://sandradodd.com/unschooling
http://learninginfreedom.com/
http://home.earthlink.net/~fetteroll/rejoycing/
Parenting a Free Child by Rue Kream <http://www.freechild.info/>
The Unschooling Handbook : How to Use the Whole World As Your Child's Classroom by Mary Griffith

--
~Mary
http://zenmommasgarden.blogspot.com/

"The miracle is not to walk on water. The miracle is to walk on the
green earth, dwelling deeply in the present moment and feeling truly
alive."
~Thich Nhat Hanh

-------------- Original message ----------------------
From: Daneyl Carrington <dunky2000@...>

[email protected]

>>After going to a public school my entire life, and sending my kids this long how long does it take to get over the mentality of test scores meaning something?>>

The general rule of thumb for deschooling, which is what you'll need to do, is to allow one month for every year you were in school. So it'll take your kids 6 or so months to decompress and shake off the school-think. For you I'm afraid it will be a longer process since you've got your school years plus your kids'!

The more you read and discuss on lists like these though, the easier it will come. We'll help you to question the answers instead of only answering the questions.

--
~Mary
http://zenmommasgarden.blogspot.com/

"The miracle is not to walk on water. The miracle is to walk on the
green earth, dwelling deeply in the present moment and feeling truly
alive."
~Thich Nhat Hanh

-------------- Original message ----------------------
From: Daneyl Carrington <dunky2000@...>

[email protected]

-----Original Message-----
From: Daneyl Carrington <dunky2000@...>
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
---------------------------------------
After going to a public school my entire life, and sending my kids
this long
how long does it take to get over the mentality of test scores meaning
something? I'm not saying test scores are the most important things in
life, I
understand they're not. I'm much happier when my children learn
something on
their own or by asking questions but I come from a family full of
teachers who
stress test scores all the time.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
---------------------------------------

The rule of thumb is that it takes one month per year you were
schooled. If you have a college degree, chances are it will take *you*
a minimum of 16 months. And you start counting from the *last* time you
worried about it! <g> Meaning: if you were doing OK for six months and
then started nagging your children to pick up workbooks or read
something, your deschooling has been interrupted. You've lost their
trust. You now have 16 more months to deschool instead of the 10 months
you had before!

Block out the family views. If you must, block interaction witth them
until you're comfortable with your decision---until you believe you
have deschooled yourself. Don't let them invade your deschooling.



~Kelly

Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://liveandlearnconference.org

“Learn as if you were going to live forever.
Live as if you were going to die tomorrow.” ~ Mahatma Gandhi

Debi

My name is Debi. I am a mother of 2 great children. Kayla who is 18,
who just graduated high school and boy was it a struggle. And my son
Ethan who is 10, who is in 4th grade in public school still. I am
thinking of taking him out of the elementary school and start home
schooling him. I have no clue where to start but I have been doing a
lot of research and unschooling seems to be what would fit us the
best.

Ethan is a very sensitive child who can not express himself very well
and had many health problems. He is developmental delayed as he can
not tie his shoes, ride a bike, his fine motor skills are lacking yet
but he sure can memorise things to get by in class. I kept him back
in 3rd grade and he did much better. He was A B honor roll all year.
But what I find frustrating with public schools is even if they label
a child with a disability sometimes the teachers still will not work
with the child.

So this is where I am at, because he used to love learning and now it
seems he just gets frustrated knowing he has to go back in that
classroom each day.

Any help or knowledge on how to get started would be a major help for
me. I have broke it down to 2 different cover schools I am deciding
to use but from there I am lost.

I do not have much support here. My family thinks I am crazy to do
this, but I have seen my daughter struggle thru public school just to
prove them wrong and graduate with a regular diploma ( they wanted
her to graduate with just a occupational diploma)

Ok I am long winded. I hope to get to know everyone

Thanks again

Debi

[email protected]

In a message dated 8/7/2007 11:09:30 A.M. Pacific Daylight Time,
liddledevlangel@... writes:

So this is where I am at, because he used to love learning and now it
seems he just gets frustrated knowing he has to go back in that
classroom each day.

Any help or knowledge on how to get started would be a major help for
me. I have broke it down to 2 different cover schools I am deciding
to use but from there I am lost.



____________________________________________________

Hi, Debi! Nice to meet you!

to get started, well for me, it took a few things (and I consider myself
still in the act of starting, too).

1. Acknowledging your child's needs (you got that!)
2. Knowing options are there (you got that too!)
3. Having the confidence to trust and be open, so you can continue to listen
to your son with more than your ears - so you can say to those naysayers,
"Ha! This'll be great. Just you watch!" ;) (and you WILL have that, really!)

Honestly? Keep reading. Here, other lists maybe, books, all the blogs fro
the parents here...and let your son just BE for a bit. He may need 4-5 months or
longer before he sees his own sense of trust and love of learning return. (I
heard an average type number is as many years as they were conventionally
schooled, will be as many months as they need to decompress - give or take -
and I THINK that's what I heard, lol!)

Family members can be told, "I appreciate your concern and I will take that
into consideration." and then be DONE with it.

This is fun. I've never been able to let go and love and enjoy my children
in this way before. I was too busy molding them...or so I thought. Now, they
help mold me. We are a unit in our individuality.

Have fun with this new direction your lives are taking. It's a wonderful
ride.

Karen






************************************** Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL at
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Deb

--- In [email protected], "Debi" <liddledevlangel@...>
wrote:
I have broke it down to 2 different cover schools I am deciding
to use but from there I am lost.

Also make sure you know the LAWS where you are (wherever that is) and
whether you even need a cover school.

--Deb

Melissa

Ethan sounds like my Josh in terms of problems, and it was fourth
grade that was the breaking point for us as well. As for how to get
started, I don't know where you live, and that would change the
answer. In Oklahoma, we didn't have to do anything, there is no
paperwork, there is no annual testing, what have you. We spent the
first 18 months deschooling, trying to get rid of that stress and
rediscover his love of learning.
I don't think you're crazy, YOU don't think you're crazy, and how
your family sees you is of little consequence IF YOU DON"T ALLOW them
to drag you down. Homeschooling is great for every kid, but
especially important for those who have delays or disabilities.
Melissa
Mom to Josh (12), Breanna (10), Emily (8), Rachel (7), Sam (6), Dan
(4), and Avari Rose (19 months)

share our lives at
http://360.yahoo.com/multimomma



On Aug 7, 2007, at 11:53 AM, Debi wrote:

> My name is Debi. I am a mother of 2 great children. Kayla who is 18,
> who just graduated high school and boy was it a struggle. And my son
> Ethan who is 10, who is in 4th grade in public school still. I am
> thinking of taking him out of the elementary school and start home
> schooling him. I have no clue where to start but I have been doing a
> lot of research and unschooling seems to be what would fit us the
> best.
>
> Ethan is a very sensitive child who can not express himself very well
> and had many health problems. He is developmental delayed as he can
> not tie his shoes, ride a bike, his fine motor skills are lacking yet
> but he sure can memorise things to get by in class. I kept him back
> in 3rd grade and he did much better. He was A B honor roll all year.
> But what I find frustrating with public schools is even if they label
> a child with a disability sometimes the teachers still will not work
> with the child.
>
> So this is where I am at, because he used to love learning and now it
> seems he just gets frustrated knowing he has to go back in that
> classroom each day.
>
> Any help or knowledge on how to get started would be a major help for
> me. I have broke it down to 2 different cover schools I am deciding
> to use but from there I am lost.
>
> I do not have much support here. My family thinks I am crazy to do
> this, but I have seen my daughter struggle thru public school just to
> prove them wrong and graduate with a regular diploma ( they wanted
> her to graduate with just a occupational diploma)
>
> Ok I am long winded. I hope to get to know everyone
>
> Thanks again
>
> Debi
>
>
>



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

I live in Alabama, I know we have to have a cover school. I am not sure
about annual testing and so forth. I know the cover school takes care of the
paperwork part of notifying the school. Thanks for the support. It is so much
appreicated.


In a message dated 8/7/2007 5:14:59 P.M. Central Daylight Time,
autismhelp@... writes:

Ethan sounds like my Josh in terms of problems, and it was fourth
grade that was the breaking point for us as well. As for how to get
started, I don't know where you live, and that would change the
answer. In Oklahoma, we didn't have to do anything, there is no
paperwork, there is no annual testing, what have you. We spent the
first 18 months deschooling, trying to get rid of that stress and
rediscover his love of learning.
I don't think you're crazy, YOU don't think you're crazy, and how
your family sees you is of little consequence IF YOU DON"T ALLOW them
to drag you down. Homeschooling is great for every kid, but
especially important for those who have delays or disabilities.
Melissa
Mom to Josh (12), Breanna (10), Emily (8), Rachel (7), Sam (6), Dan
(4), and Avari Rose (19 months)







************************************** Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL at
http://discover.aol.com/memed/aolcom30tour


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]