Mette G.

>>>Sigh.....thanks all for taking the time to share your thoughts and ideas. Unfortunately, none of them seem to pertain to me, my kids or our situation at all. I really appreciate that this is a list for bouncing ideas, so bounce away <<<
 
I first joined this list about 2 years ago and posted a question, got a lot of feedback and had the exact same reaction. I felt completely misunderstood, felt that people read things into my posts and above all, I felt
they weren't adressing *my* situation at all. I kept saying "but you don't understand" - which only added to the confusion and at one point when Sandra wrote that I was making it all about me instead of about the principles of peaceful parenting, I got offended and left in a huff...
 
It took me a long time to "get" the idea of concrete questions and situations being used as springboards for discussion of principles that are generally applicable. It took me a long time to understand that it wasn't *me* that was being "burned at the unschooling stake" but rather that someone was responding to thoughts that came up from what I had written or from the subsequent exchange, and that those ideas being presented could possibly, likely be pertaining to SOMEONE, now or later. It wasn't about *me* precisely ;-)
 
>>>>The following paragraph is addressed to me, as witnessed by the use of "you,"  as were most of the others. So I'm confused as to why it would be stated that they are not addressed to me...<<<
 
I think what's hard to understand with this list, is that once you've posted an idea (a question, a situation...) it's no longer yours. People will respond to ideas directly or indirectly launched by the OP - extrapolate and talk about it in a general way, the you not always being "you-the-original-poster" but you, we, someone - a parent. This is in any case how I understand it now, and I am getting so much more from the discussion this way.
 
Mette