lamortimer

Here's an article describing research that shows that not only is spanking detrimental to kids (increases child's aggression) but that other conventional forms of discipline not only don't "improve" children's behavior but also increase children's anxiety.

Spanking sparks aggression, does little to reduce behavior problems
http://www.physorg.com/news189367630.html

"It may be that the long-term investments that we make in children, like spending time with them, showing that we love them and listening to them, have a more powerful positive effect on behavior than any form of discipline," said Andrew Grogan-Kaylor, U-M associate professor of social work.

Lori


Jill Parmer

On Apr 2, 2010, at 8:06 AM, Sandra Dodd wrote:

> Thanks for that note and link, Lori. I've added it here:
> http://sandradodd.com/s/stop

Quote from that page and article, ""It may be that the long-term
investments that we make in children, like spending time with them,
showing that we love them and listening to them, have a more powerful
positive effect on behavior than any form of discipline," said Andrew
Grogan-Kaylor, U-M associate professor of social work."

This makes sense in my experience, that spending time with my kids
and listening to them and talking with them, which I think does show
my love, has had lots and lots of positive effects, so many it makes
me giddy sometimes. And I really really think that kids would like
their parents to spend time with them.

This happened in World of Warcraft a couple days ago. (Which I
started out playing with my kids to know about the game they were
playing and help them. It's turned out that I like the game and
still play with them....mostly I help them with gold, and using my
priest to help them stay alive longer. :-))
------
A player: What did you farm to get your mechano hog? (meaning, how
did you make so much gold to get that very expensive riding machine
(carries 2 players)?)

Luke: My mom's love.

A player: ... (meaning, huh?)

Luke: She gave it to me for christmas, we're both engineers.
(engineering is a profession in WoW, where you can make really cool
gadgets)

A player: Your mom plays WoW? Sweet.
-------
This has happened lots of times, and it's always made me think that
kids really like their parents to participate with them in a lot of
things. Only one time did a player say something about never
wanting their parent to play WoW with them.

~Jill (Addi 15, Luke 11)



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Katrine Clip

Most of the comments on that website still seem to be in favor of spanking.
I don't think the commenters really understood the main idea in the article!
Most keep defending spanking, it didn't hurt them and it doesn't hurt their
kids. So spanking will go on...

-Katrine

On Thu, Apr 1, 2010 at 8:13 PM, lamortimer <lori@...> wrote:

>
>
> Here's an article describing research that shows that not only is spanking
> detrimental to kids (increases child's aggression) but that other
> conventional forms of discipline not only don't "improve" children's
> behavior but also increase children's anxiety.
>
> Spanking sparks aggression, does little to reduce behavior problems
> http://www.physorg.com/news189367630.html
>
>
>


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Sandra Dodd

-=-Most of the comments on that website still seem to be in favor of
spanking.
I don't think the commenters really understood the main idea in the
article!-=-

There has never been an idea that everyone understands.
There will never be an idea that everyone understands.
That's not a possibility.

-=-Most keep defending spanking, it didn't hurt them and it doesn't
hurt their
kids. So spanking will go on...-=-

At your house, you mean?

They can't make you spank. They can't keep you from spanking.
The purpose of this list is to help any single reader find good ideas
and arguments to help her understand unschooling.

If you're any closer to understanding how you want to interact with
your children, then the list and the links have been helpful.

When you post, please try to make sure it will be helpful to others on
the list.

Sandra




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