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In a message dated 9/27/2008 4:06:19 PM Eastern Daylight Time:

<<<-=-I really truly believe that life is for LIVING not for watching other
people live!-=->>>



I think there is a lot to be said for watching people. I have learned a
whole heck of a lot over the years watching people. From the time I was very,
very young (under 5) to at least when my oldest was born (I don't have much time
for just watching any more), I have loved people-watching. One of my
*favorite* activities (before kids) is going to the mall on Christmas Eve and sitting
smack in the middle and watching the folks. The most people I can imagine in
one place to watch. What I've learned while watching other people has helped
me in my relationships with friends, love-interests, customers, strangers,
businesses and most certainly my children.

It may fit into those "learning styles" kind of things, since some people
learn by doing, some learn by reading, some by watching... I've learned a lot
about what I want (which is what brought unschooling fully into our lives) and
what I *don't* want by watching. I've also learned a lot of nuances, how the
details of little things work between people by watching. Watching has been
pretty good for me.

Peace,
De



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Sandra Dodd

-=-I've also learned a lot of nuances, how the
details of little things work between people by watching. Watching
has been
pretty good for me.-=-

I used to like to watch other people in church. I could learn a lot
about what people thought about the sermon by watching their facial
expressions. Most seemed to think they wished it would be over. <g>
And I used to feel sorry for the organist and music director because
they were stuck being up there in front of everyone with their facial
expressions part of the whole tableau. They had to be attentive and
approving and not bored-looking.

I've watched lots of people performing (plays, music, juggling/
comedy). The line between watching other people work or build or
play sports or music and doing it oneself isn't so black and white.

Sandra

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Jenny C

> I think there is a lot to be said for watching people. I have learned
a
> whole heck of a lot over the years watching people. From the time I
was very,
> very young (under 5) to at least when my oldest was born (I don't have
much time
> for just watching any more), I have loved people-watching.

People watching, now that's an activity in and of itself! We often go
out of our way to go THROUGH downtown rather than around it on the
freeway, just for this alone!

That's a whole different thing than watching someone else live their
life and not really doing anything yourself. Kind of like how the
character "Kelly" is in the american version of "The Office". She
absolutely lives for Hollywood gossip and has made it her life, well
that, and her sort of ex-boyfriend.

Sandra Dodd

-=-That's a whole different thing than watching someone else live their
life and not really doing anything yourself. Kind of like how the
character "Kelly" is in the american version of "The Office". She
absolutely lives for Hollywood gossip and has made it her life, well
that, and her sort of ex-boyfriend.-=-

I don't think this is a recent phenomenon, though, nor necessarily evil.

There are people who collect things. A guy sold his collection of
mechanical banks at auction. It made millions of dollars. Was that
living his life? Probably the fifteenth or twentieth bank he
bought, his relatives were rolling their eyes about how he should get
a life.

What if he had been saving Paul Newman souvenirs? Paul Newman died.
People care.

What if someone is an expert on baseball stats?

We can't know by watching what a person does whether it's valuable
emotionally or intellectually or morally to them.

Keith's mom has always thought his SCA activity was stupid and a
waste of time. She was embarrassed that he dressed up and had a made-
up name. Years back she worked at a hospital (head nurse of ICU)
and a friend of ours who was an anesthesist discovered the
connection. She told Keith's mom, at work, how wonderful Keith is,
how talented, and how popular. His mom was more impressed then, but
she was impressed because a medical professional said Keith was great.

Keith is waking Marty up right now to go to fighter practice (armored
combat get-together that happens every week here, and has since
before I knew Keith). He told me a while ago that he doesn't feel
very good and doesn't want to go, but Marty is just really getting
into it lately and Keith wants to be supportive, and he likes to see
people's reactions to Marty.

So even though Keith and Marty are doing something of questionable
value on the general market of the respect activities get, Keith is
directly proud of Marty, and involved, and interested.

I'm not sure stamp collecting or playing WoW would be any better or
worse. Golf? If Keith and his son played golf every week, more
people would be impressed. I wouldn't be among them.



Sandra

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Pamela Sorooshian

On Sep 27, 2008, at 10:43 PM, Sandra Dodd wrote:

> I've watched lots of people performing (plays, music, juggling/
> comedy). The line between watching other people work or build or
> play sports or music and doing it oneself isn't so black and white.

Today we went to see the film of the last performance of RENT on
Broadway. I've seen RENT live quite a few times, including on Broadway
just a few months ago. I got pretty caught up in the performance and I
started to applaud with the filmed audience. One of my daughters
touched my arm and I caught myself - I was the only person in the
theater who was applauding. Later in the show, other people did the
same thing, though.

Not just "watching" - but sitting in a theater watching a film of a
show being performed in front of an audience of people who were "just
watching." <G>

It got me thinking about applause and audience reaction to a
performance. A "good" audience can make show better. And vice versa.

Hmm, which means it is a good idea to clap and yell bravo like crazy
in the beginning of a show - get the performers psyched up.

But, the applause won't have any effect when the show is on film -
guess that's one reason why people didn't applaud. It was an odd
feeling for me - I'm used to expressing myself during a show!

-pam

Sandra Dodd

-=-But, the applause won't have any effect when the show is on film -
guess that's one reason why people didn't applaud. It was an odd
feeling for me - I'm used to expressing myself during a show!-=-

Half the people watching that with us were applauding. I wasn't, but
I did a couple of times gasp or say "Wow" and I didn't feel so bad
saying something aloud, because I wasn't going to distract those
actors. <g>

One guy couldn't help singing along once in a while, but it was
fine. He wasn't distracting the performers either!

Holly and I were doing something together and we discussed it and now
I'm sharing feedback with Pam (and others) who also saw it. We've
already talked (Holly and I) a fair amount about Desperate
Housewives. They're not "real" but the discussion was real. They're
as real as Lucy Ricardo or Nicholas Nickleby or Hamlet.

The nature of reality is always an interesting topic to me, and I
think it's very important for unschoolers to consider what's "real"
when they're talking about video games and other media in which kids
are involved.

My kids had very early exposure to ideas about what's real. Their
dad had swords that "weren't real." They had little foam swords that
both were and were not real, depending on one's point of view.
Keith's rattan sword was more "real" than their foam bats. And
Keith has reproduction swords. Also not "real" meaning not a museum
piece 800 year old sword. Yet all of them "could put your eye out"
and that. But none of it was "violence."

Sandra






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